• Member Since 27th Jun, 2015
  • offline last seen Mar 17th, 2021

Shock n awe


Comments ( 15 )

Y'know... I really think this story has potential to be amazing.
You made some mistakes, like: grammar, run-on sentences, a lack of commas, and capitalization.
Also," Shinning "is spelled "Shining". Other than that, great job.
This was definitely a lot better than some beginner story's I've read.
Hopefully this helped, and if not.
I'LL STILL READ IT! YEAAAAH!
Hope to see more soon

I got lost in it and thought it was the end of the story. xD

7856239
I never was good at English class. I won't be able to do any adjustments for at least 4 months. I ship tomarrow for boot.

"She replied and extended her hand to mine and gave it a genital shake i started getting that protective feeling again."

stuffpoint.com/my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic/image/75603-my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-lolwat.jpg

>>shock n awe Well I wish you luck, BE THE BEST!

This is awesome. Hope to see more.

I'm intrigue, so I will keep reading. Please sir, may I have more chapters?

7857562
Sure after four months of boot. actually waiting at the airport for the plane.

7857603
I see well have fun in there, and good luck

Have fun I could let you in on alot of the jokes but it's a right of passage just roll with it and have fun. BEWARE OF THE E-4 MAFIA!

10420781
Then at the very least is already over right?

10420788
Yep. my bad luck was I got out drove all the way home then next day state lockdown.

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