Dashi Lover
Joined 6th Feb, 2012 ·
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Not a bad little story you have here.
The comedic value of the first half blends surprisingly nicely with the darker second half of the story.
Is the story this is a continuation of on this site and if so what is it called?
Very interesting story. Do you have a link to what this is a continuation of? Just to get a little more perspective on this?
590654 It was meant to be dark all the way through. Sadly, darkfics never survive the wrath of Pinkie Pie.
590664 Why thank you ^^, and no, it's not on this site. It was actually surprisingly horrendous, and if I ever get back into clopfic writing it will be rewritten for your viewing pleasure. (See what I did there?)
590684 I do, but it's on an adult site that Fimfiction probably wouldn't appreciate me linking to such sites.
590696
I, for one, salute you good sir. Keep up the good work.
590696
Well that's going to annoy me now....I hate not being able to read the thing that leads into another thing...drives me battier than Pinkie Pie!
Now to annoy you with my rant
ITS MINUT-*drop dead*
"The box had been delivered 10 minuets ago."
MINUTES
“Well… I thought if you were crying then you really needed a surprise party so… Wait a minuet… "
Yes, minUTE. Unless you have an obscure use of the term "minuet" to mean a length of time equivalent to the time it takes to play a minuet.
So, good, not exactly the kind of style I enjoy, but the writing is good and everything.
This was really good. I think it is a powerful message to all those who have been in in twilight's situation here. I don't think i would enjoy the earlier fic but this one was golden.
need a moment right?
hmmm, not sure if want......
590715 It's not actually that critical ^^; Aforementioned fic was a failed attempt to link a whole lot of clop-fics together through one Derpy Fic. (In my defense, I usually write my clopfics very late at night) So all the re;event information was included in this fic, you're not really missing out. ^^;
590755 Sorry, I always misspell minute, it's hard when there are so many words that sound the same with similar spelling. ^^;
594231 It was intended to be a suspense/comedy. And Twi did do something with the box, she poked it and beat up the pony inside. That thumbs down was probably my friend, who I showed it to and they hated it. They also hated "The Star in Yellow" (SPONSOR!) which was one of my favorite Fanfics so I'm not bothered by it.
Uh ...
This started off as a comedy about Twilight's anxiety clashing with Pinkie's exuberance, and then became a darkfic where Twilight was molested. Bro, I don't know, feels like you jumped genres in the middle. That only works if you're William Shakespeare and you have five acts to spread it out over; here, feels a bit like literary whiplash.