I love writing, even though i haven't done much of it. Oh, I also like video games, music and ponies
A war is brewing between ponies and humans. Can Alexander the Third stop it alone, or will he need help from the pony side? The fate of humanity and ponykind rests on one man's and one mare's shoulders...
Contains OCs, strong language and some gruesome scenes...
P.S. Sorry if my dialogue grammar is wrong, it's not my strong point
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From what I can tell, the concept for this story is decent enough, but it's held back by multiple issues.
While your grammar and spelling certainly isn't horrid, it could use a bit of work. I'd recommend looking over it and researching aspects you aren't sure about. Having an editor also helps.
The chapter is rather short. Remember, this is the first time a reader will see your story, so you need to draw them in. Having a longer length not only looks better, but it also allows you to provide more information and flesh things out. This makes the story more interesting and in turn generates more interest from your readers.
There are parts of this story that don't seem very realistic. For example: the way you portray ponies and humans adjusting to living together feels extremely glossed over. This would be a great place to flesh things out a bit. You don't have to tell the reader everything, but you should give enough information to make sense. As it is, there is no explanation whatsoever, and that really hurts the story.
I don't feel the humans would give up eating meat so easily, and ponies don't seem the type to adjust to using new technology very quickly. Perhaps the humans were desperate enough to do so, but we have no idea how the ended up in Equestria. Was their world destroyed? Did they come in spaceships? Was there a mass teleportation of some sort? Was a portal between worlds created? I don't know, and I have no clue as to what happened. I'm just left confused.
Hardly any information on the protagonist is given out, so I don't feel a connection to him. Come on, show a little personality!
Lastly, you should probably space out the paragraphs. It's a minor adjustment, but it really makes a story more visually appealing.
This story could be good, but it is in serious need of improvement.
You have the potential to be a great author. This is very good for a first fic, and you've done everything almost perfectly. You set the tone correctly, you describe the setting masterfully, and, most importantly, you've gotten my interest.
The on,y problem I can name off the top of my head is the occasional grammatical or spelling mistake.
Bravo.