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Apple Bloom's Diary

Apple Bloom's diary and her struggle to get her cutie mark.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 3 )

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TheApexSovereign

TheApexSovereign #1 · Mar 2nd, 2014 · 1 · ·

I could imagine A.B. talking like this. Minor complaint, the dates! I wish there was some so I can get a sense of time with this. But regardless, an enjoyable read, and I hope you prosper on FimFiction, friend! Welcome!

Screw

Screw #2 · Mar 5th, 2014 · · ·

I'm a pre-reader or critique-r in 'training'.

There were a few problems with the grammar and consistency.
1) Ponies became people.
2)

I always try to smile and stay positive for them

I've always tried/I have always tried
3) A few times you've made some words present tense when they should be past.

Other than that, this type of story method isn't my forte. Good luck with further fictions

Fire Flareon

Fire Flareon #3 · 4 weeks ago · · ·

I remember reading this years ago and it’s still one of my favorites. I think I might have liked it if the show went in this direction and had the CMC realize they could still live fulfilling lives even without a cutie mark.