A heartbroken Spike goes through the magic mirror to find love and acceptance in the EG universe.
Page generated in 0.039 seconds
Total duration
695 users online
1,359,794 hits today, 2,064,738 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
No...
5031015 "Sorry sugarcube, but you're gonna halfta elaborate on that there answer."
5031029
Its for the best not include the cmc....
Ayeeeeyah! Chapter kicked ass, and I await the next chapter.
Yeah!
YES! INCLUDE THE CMC! the CMC make everything more entertaining!
No CMC please I rather enjoy the mature nature of this story and they would put a very definite strain on that atmosphere. However this is your story and I'll enjoy your writing regardless.
I really liked this chapter (mostly because i like japanese themes) but I can't help but feel like, Spike should have given Rarity cunnilingus in return, just to kind of, soften her up, if you will
5031260 Funny you should mention that. I was seriously considering adding such a scene before he actually had sex with her, but I was already a week behind with this chapter so I completely lacked the motivation to write it.
Sorry, but quality sex scenes are very labor intensive to produce. roundstable.com/forums/images/smilies/spikeletter.png
The CMC girls in there as a cameo? Sure, just like how you mentioned Sweetie in the story. We know that she's Rarity sister; she just doesn't need a big role, just enough that we don't have to got stupidly "Duuuh....where is she/Where did she come from" or something similar.
They do not need to be major players in your work--unless you have a purpose for one or more of them.
Perfect. As for the CMC it's your call.
Coco Pommel as a hot springs resort staffer? Yes please! I can picture human Coco in a kimono and it is ADORABLE.
Minor nitpick: a resort such as this would usually serve tea first, then sake upon request.
D'awww, poor Coco. I just wanna hug her.
More than minor nitpick: You don't actually bathe in the onsen. Guests clean themselves before entering the onsen. Actual ryokan have ejected guests for this, and in Hokkaido, Russian visitors have been permanently banned from most ryokan because of precisely this.
Like weddings!
That's...another thing you REALLY don't do at an onsen. Also, telling a guest that it's common for couples to do it in the onsen? That's...really bad for business. Nobody in their right mind would want to get into water that people have had sex in.
I mean yeah, okay, there's a lot of hentai manga where that goes on, but...that's hentai manga. In real life, that shit would get you kicked out and/or arrested, and the staff damn sure would not encourage it.
5032336 I wasn't really going for the whole "completely realistic compared to the actual cultural practices of modern Japan" thing in this particular chapter.
That being said, I pretty much wanted this to turn out like a hentai manga. In that regard, I succeeded. Yay~ roundstable.com/forums/images/smilies/flutterhooray.gif
Yeaaa I don't think the CMC should be in here. Just being honest
Yay Coco made it in XD
5032586 I think I agree with ya on that.
Really it depends on how old they are and how *ahem* knowledgeable they are about the goings on in intimacy.
5031015 5031095 5031123 5031172 5031208 5031260 5031402 5032336 5032586 5032741 5033019
And for the lot of you (and everyone else who reads the comments), I have a bit of news. Just learned that if you make a comment on an early chapter of a story, if a reply is made on a later chapter then it won't show up in the notifications. (I've tested this several times and know it to be true) Do with information what you will.
5034747
5034733
Dude, what are you talking about??? I get notifications all the time, and usually they are notifications that tell me that someone replied to a comment you made, no matter how recent or long ago it was said, or if you have a story or stories published under your handle, the notification will tell you when other users have favorited the story.
And there's the feed (the world icon on the top left of the screen) that will alert you of new stories, updates to stories you have gold-starred (faved), as well as blogs posts of people you follow and alert you to new stories that have been shown to groups you've joined.
Again, I don't quite understand your statement.
5034778 Okay, why don't we say that there's a story with five chapters in it. You make a comment on the second chapter and I see it from the home page and comment on it from there. The site sees it as I am replying from the fifth chapter and, as such, you won't receive a notification that I made a reply at all. The only way it will show up is if I go to the second chapter and reply from there.
5034758 I don't get it either (and a good thing I make it a point to check stories I make comments on from time to time. I didn't get a notification that you replied. If that meant you didn't understand what I meant then allow me to present an example:
5034823 I've seen it before
5034881 Really? Try making a comment on chapter 1 and I'll reply to it from here. Five will get ya ten says you get no notification.
5034798
I think I can understand it now. That's quite wonky, if I didn't see it before. But it just seems like a very minor inconvience---but not enough of a incovninence to have a complaint. Personal experience, I still reply from the chapter where it is relevent to the conversation. It's just a thing I do to make sure that I'm replying to the right commenter. I hardly comment from the main page.
Seems like a matter of personal preference.
5034904 As in, I've done it with another story. They've commented on an unpublished chapter, and when I commented back, it said the chapter before it.
5034916 Oh! Pardon me whilst I hang my head in shame a moment. ... We're back!
Dang it! I'm needing to head to Church, so I'll have to give you a full report later on once I'm back.
I hope you do include the CMC at some point, this story is good enough but the implied idea that Sweetie is okay with being nude because of her parents raising her as nudists might play up for some laughs in future chapters, like Spike walking in on her and awkwardness ensuring, or her trying to explain to Scootaloo and Applebloom why she is so comfortable about it
I hope something like that happens cause that sounds hilarious in my head.
THEY FINALLY DID IT.(14 chapters)
derpicdn.net/img/view/2014/1/4/515076__safe_twilight+sparkle_rainbow+dash_pinkie+pie_fluttershy_applejack_animated_princess+twilight_hug_season+4.gif
I'm surprised that Sweetie Belle hasn't made an appearance and I would like to see her.
I still say that you need to work on the pacing. As far as foreplay goes you're fine, it's just when you get to the actual sex you rush it. It finishes so quick before we can enjoy it.
WHITE RANGER, TIGER POWER!
That is how I feel.
Question: What happened to the ring Rarity bought for Spike? It seemed like it just vanished after the chapter it was bought in. And for that matter what about the necklace? It certainly seems like both of these items aren't getting very much attention.
5112907 The necklace will play an important role later in the story concerning the "Equestrian" ponies. As for the ring, Rarity will give it to him eventually. Neither have vanished, they just weren't the focus of this particular chapter.
5114032 I see, all right then. Can't wait for the next chapter to come out.
If Sweetie Belle is to play any significant part during the story, yes, the CMC should definitely be added at some point.
please no CMC