Billy Krumroy a human is somehow transported to Ponyville and is turned into a pony. soon he is found by Twilight Sparkle and is brought to Princess Celestia who reviles that he is part of an ancient prophecy stating that he will one day save Equestria from a great evil. First, however, he must find and wield the great Sword of Harmony. Billy then changes his name to Saber Strike. And since Billy's pony form is a unicorn, the princess tasks Twilight to instruct him in the ways of magic.
Cover art by MirandaEscalante
Chapters (3)
Okay...Ummm.....Where to start. Obviously this is your first ever post here on FimFiction. The plot, the way i see it, could really work. As for your first chapter, you needed to think more carefully on what to put down. First off, we know nothing about Billy other than he is from Tennessee and he likes to play games. His life back home is boring, and that's it. To me it seems that you did not truly think about character development enough. Everything is so rushed. One second he is freaking out, and the next he is calm? You really need to put more detail into this story. Don't get me wrong, I like the plot that you are going to be doing, but you need to sit down and think this over before you post another chapter. Get someone to help you out with this and it will go far. Also, you will need a proofreader to aid in spelling and grammatical errors. I will withhold my rating for now.
Write on!
Rokkurin
I expected Billy Mays. You should make this story about Billy Mays instead of this other guy. Way cooler.
i.imgur.com/ikQmsK4.gif
So much nope. Seriously.