The remainder of the day passed without incident, as did the night and at least the first part of the following day. Carrot Top arrived with her cart early in the morning, before any of the Apple clan showed up, as did the other produce sellers of Ponyville that Trixie had, by hook and crook, been able to drag into her scheme. None of them seemed particularly confident, but Trixie managed to re-assure all of them in various ways – mostly, helped out by random ponies passing by, who seemed confused as to what was happening but, when Trixie explained her intentions, at least put on a show of being happy to have more than just apples to eat tonight.
The arrival of the Apple clan’s veritable armada of stalls, at around three o’clock, was where the problems began, although for the rest of her days Trixie would treasure her memory of the look on Applejack’s face.
“What in tarnatation am Ah lookin’ at here?” the orange earth pony demanded as she stomped up to Trixie’s home.
Trixie paused a moment as she chewed thoughtfully, looking to the ensemble she had in her telekinetic grasp. “Well,” she said, “first I started with a few carrots, which I diced up and mixed with butter, or I meant to anyway but I was out, but there was still some cheese, and what they hay, it’s all dairy anyway, right? So then – ”
If looks could have killed, then Applejack’s glare would have depopulated the entire region.
“Oh, you mean the food stalls,” Trixie interrupted herself, glancing behind her. “Well, I thought over our conversation from a few days ago, and I thought to myself, hey, I’ve known Princess Luna for a decade now, and I know what she likes to eat and what she doesn’t, and I know for a fact that if she doesn’t have anything but apples to look forward to, she’ll probably go crazy and let Discord loose or something.”
Applejack’s glare managed to grow deadly enough to wipe out all of Equestria and a good portion of the surrounding nations as well. “Ah thought we were on the same page here,” she intoned. “Ah thought y’all understood just how much mah family depends upon the sales from tonight.”
Trixie nodded. “Yeah, but then I thought how much they,” Trixie jerked a hook behind her, at the vendors who were trying their hardest to look any direction but towards Applejack, “need the bits as well.”
“But they weren’t expectin’ none!” Applejack exclaimed. “They get by just fine every year all the same! This ain’t nothin’ but tramplin’ all over centuries of Ponyville tradition – ”
Trixie pulled out one of her most unpleasant smirks. “Applejack,” she intoned, “are you worried that you can’t compete?”
The orange pony backed up several steps as though Trixie had struck her. “What?” she demanded. “Mah apples, mah family’s apples, are the best in Equestria! Mah family’s recipies are the best!”
“But do we really know that?” Trixie asked, as she tapped her two front hooves together. “Every year you get the three biggest holidays all to yourselves. Must be comfortable up on that throne you’ve built from apple cores. Must be a scary thought of having to actually fight for your business – ”
Applejack’s glare returned with a force that could have knocked the sun and moon from orbit. “Ah think you may want to stop talkin’ now,” she said – ordered – in a low voice. Trixie obeyed, but her grin was loquacious to a fault. After a few moments of regarding it, Applejack trotted up to Trixie, her face getting very, very close to the unicorn’s own. “Ah don’t know what y’all are playin’ at,” she said, then looked past Trixie, at the other farmers. “Any of y’all! But it looks like you want a fight. And Luna as my witness Ah’m willin’ to oblige.”
“Excellent,” Trixie responded, stepping back a few paces, but only so that she could wave her hooves in a shooing manner. “Now trot off, ‘cause I have a lot of – ”
“I am going to murder you!” an almost impossibly loud voice shouted from straight above, reaching and maybe even surpassing volumes that Trixie had previously thought only Princess Luna capable of. Trixie and Applejack both looked up to find a small, jet-black cloud hovering directly overhead, cackling with barely contained lightning. Standing atop it, panting heavily with wings spread wide in threat, was a jasmine-coated pegasus.
Raindrops leapt from her cloud, landing with a thud next to Applejack. She briefly turned to look at the earth pony. “Hi,” she said.
“Howdy,” Applejack returned, tipping her hat.
“You might want to stand back.”
Applejack glanced at the miniature thundercloud overhead. “Ah reckon Ah might do just that,” she said, cantering away and to her clan. She kept an eye over her shoulder, however – locked on Trixie. The mare had the distinct sense that Applejack was trying to preserve the look currently plastered on Trixie’s face so that she could treasure it for the rest of her days.
Raindrops’ attention was turned once more to Trixie, and she took a single step forward, though with enough force to actually crack one of the cobbled stones beneath her hooves. Trixie blinked at that. She had expecting Raindrops to be angry. She had not been expecting a pony who could break stone with her hooves – her bare hooves, as it seemed that Raindrops, like most pegasi, went without shoes.
“Weather-for-hire ponies.” Raindrops said, her voice now frighteningly calm. “I got up and brushed my mane and went to work this morning and I found a dozen of those reprobates swarming my weather patrol station!”
“It’s not really your – ”
“Don’t care!” Raindrops exclaimed, taking another step forward. “Now as it turns out I happened to recognize one of them. Oh yes. I recognized him – and he’s their leader, mind, of that group of…of…” words failed her for a moment before she could resume. “He was kicked out of flight school. Not flunked out. Not dropped out. Kicked out. Do you know why, Trixie? Ask me why he was.” Trixie didn’t. Raindrops once again stamped a hoof and broke stone beneath her. “Ask me why, Trixie!”
“Why?” the unicorn asked, in a small voice.
“It doesn’t matter why! Pegasi? We’re pretty rowdy as yearlings and in Cloudsdale that’s always taken into account so the kinds of things that would get somepony expelled from school down here would probably just get you a detention in Cloudsdale. So for him to do something so bad it got him kicked out? It’s a miracle he has any job at all, and it’s a sin that his job is leading a weather-for-hire team! So, Trixie, I’m going to murder you. Then I’m going to murder him. And I am going to enjoy it.”
“I didn’t know!” Trixie objected. She gathered a modicum of courage, stepping forward. “You’re the one who told me ‘no promises’ about that storm!”
Raindrops didn’t budge an inch. “So you don’t trust us to do our jobs? You think this is the first major storm to roll out of the Everfree? The first time we’ve had to deal with something like this? But no, you have to go and hire a bunch of flight school flunkies – ”
“He has the job,” Trixie interrupted, “he came highly recommended, so whatever happened in flight school it clearly didn’t have anything to do with his weather abilities, and I spent just about my entire monthly stipend on him and his team!” She leaned forward once more. “You’re the one who complained about missing your weather manager, I was just trying to help!”
Raindrops’ teeth ground together with such force that Trixie was surprised they didn’t crack. “One full day,” Trixie said, pressing what little ground she had gained. “Just one day and one night. That’s all they’re hired for. Just to keep the storm from rolling into Ponyville and ruining everything. After that they’re gone.”
The jasmine-coated pegasus leaned forward, right up to Trixie’s ear. “Sleep with an eye open,” she intoned, before beating her wings, ascending slowly to her thundercloud and carting it off. Trixie watched her go, then let out a huge sigh of relief. From somewhere near the town hall, she heard chuckling that somehow managed to be accented with a country drawl, but chose to ignore it as she turned back to her home. Carrot Top and the other ponies were staring at her.
“What?” she demanded, stomping down the path that lead from the street to her front door. “You have work to do! Get to it!” The last was punctuated by Trixie opening her door, stepping inside, and giving as hard a slam as she could manage.
---
Despite being the culmination of two straight days of standing on the surface of the sun, the beginning of the twilight, about two hours later, was almost a relief. By now, the stalls had been set up, and several unicorns were working in concert surrounding the town center to create a bubble of warm air for the multitude of ponies that were even now making their way there. More than a few were surprised by the additional stalls from Carrot Top and the rest – but more than a few were happy to have more than just apples to eat, though the Trust itself was cleaning up nicely regardless. As the sun began to approach the horizon, the pre-festival spirit was fairly high for most ponies. In addition to the food stalls, there were games of chance and skill, like hoof-throwing balls at a target or bobbing for apples (the latter, surprisingly, having been set up by somepony not related to the Apple clan); there were several open areas where vinyl records were playing music for dancing.
Trixie was paying attention to none of it. Earlier in the day, she had finally gotten around to seeing the mayor of Ponyville, formally introducing herself, presenting her credentials, engaging in light and friendly banter that served as a pleasant temporary escape from the last few days, but most importantly of all, rushing through approval for a last-minute performance to be added to the Longest Night’s retinue. Given that the music that was supposed to have been provided by Fluttershy was now largely absent and had to be provided by phonographs, it wasn’t hard to arrange an hour-and-a-half break from the sometimes dubious-quality records and instead put Trixie’s scheme into full motion.
That was for after Luna arrived, however. Right now, Trixie was standing in the crowd of hundreds of ponies inside the town hall – warmer than outside was, even with unicorn magic, albeit stuffier. Through a window, she could see a darkening sky, red and purple and not a cloud in the sky. Ringing the auditorium were Apple clan stands, but more than a few ponies were carrying foodstuffs acquired from outside, from Carrot Top and the others as well. The decorations, despite Lyra’s warnings, looked just fine – not as fine as before, but they had been adapted to take the arts-and-crafts projects of the school foals into account, Rarity apparently deciding to spread them around throughout the auditorium to turn the place into almost an art gallery. And Lyra was with her mare-friend BonBon, dressed in a fine white-and-gold gown and with lyre slung over her back, ready to play. Everything had worked out.
Trixie was alone.
This was a feat in and of itself, because she was, properly speaking, never more than six inches away from anypony. But it was as simple as that: she was alone, despite being in the middle of a crowd. She wasn’t talking to anypony, she wasn’t outside celebrating, she wasn’t doing anything more than just sitting near the middle of the auditorium, next to a dark blue pegasus mare who was chatting amicably with a gray-coated pegasus stallion – he looked like an off-duty royal guard – and doing little more than just counting down the minutes until Luna arrived and wondering how she had managed to, in a mere two days, get everything right and yet screw everything up at the same time.
Trixie let out a long sigh. Whatever. This was the course of her life now, and nothing would change it.
“Fillies and gentlecolts!” A voice exclaimed. Trixie’s reverie was interrupted at the sound, and she saw that the mayor – an older earth pony with a beige coat – had made her way to the center of the stage and was trying to get everypony’s attention. At great length, she mostly succeeded, though a few quiet conversations continued, including the unicorn and stallion sitting next to Trixie.
“Fillies and gentlecolts,” the mayor repeated, “I hope you’re all having a good time so far. I hope you slept in this morning as well, because all the fun and games have only barely begun! The shortest day of the year is drawing to a close, and it is now time to truly begin celebrating the Longest Night!”
There were cheers and hoof-stomps at that, but they were relatively subdued. Everypony knew, after all, what was coming next, and they wanted to get to it as quickly as possible. “Now then,” the mayor continued, turning slightly to face the curtains that obscured most of the stage. “As mayor of Ponyville, it is my greatest pleasure to officially introduce and welcome our guest of honor. Our ruler, our savior and our protector. The Shepherd of the Moon, the Caretaker of the Sun, the Mistress of the Star Beasts, the Sovereign of the Three Tribes, the Ruler of the Land of Equestria…Her Royal Majesty, Princess Luna Equestris!”
The curtains pulled back, revealing…nothing.
Technically untrue – there was some more stage, a wall, and another curtain that hid the backstage area. But as for the alicorn herself? Totally absent. Some ponies gasped in horror. Some ponies sputtered in confusion. Some ponies simply stood stock still, completely dumbstruck.
But the pegasus pony standing next to Trixie had continued her low conversation as if nothing was wrong – a surprising oversight on her part and one which utterly ruined her disguise. Trixie let out a long, low sigh, reached over, and poked the pony next to her. The pegasus turned in temporary confusion, before her eyes widened.
“Oh,” she said softly, beating her wings a few times and taking to the air, soaring over to the stage and landing there. She turned to the mayor. “My deepest apologies, mayor,” she said, then turned to the confused Ponyvillians, “and to you all. This festival is delightfully distracting. Give me just a moment to collect myself…”
There was a midnight-hued flash and a pop from somewhere in the crowd, and quite suddenly, standing next to the pegasus was her unicorn doppelgänger – identical in every way except for the lack of wings and the presence of the horn. Following that, an earth pony, once more identical to the other two ponies, simply leapt on stage from where she had been standing in the crowd – more than a dozen feet away. The earth pony landed evenly and smoothly despite the impossible distance of the dead-start jump, and as soon as the three were together, each began to glow with soft, blue light.
The pegasus and the unicorn moved first, turning to each other and simply stepping into one another, features becoming indistinct for several long moments before coming together once more, revealing that they had become as one, and also changed in appearance slightly – a longer snout, mane and tail length longer, though still light blue, and a somewhat more slender, delicate frame. The pony that had resulted had both wings and a horn.
She didn’t remain still for long, turning instead to the earth pony, who also stepped into the other pony. Once more, they faded from clarity for a moment – but the single resultant pony was markedly different, taller than most stallions, frame still slender but no longer delicate in appearance, instead more like that of a trained runner, with tight, well-worked muscles under her midnight blue coat. Her mane and tail were no longer hair at all, but rather a glowing, aura of midnight blue, studded with stars and rippling as though water catching a clear night sky. The pony’s flank glowed, and her star cutie mark was replaced by a nebulous black cloud, but one that was overlaid by the presence of a white, crescent moon. Following this, the pony’s hooves, chest, and the tip of her head behind her horn glowed momentarily, and in a moment she was clad in the royal regalia of blue shoes, a deep blue chest plate with a crescent moon emblazoned on its fore, and a black, three-pointed crown.
The Ponyvillians stared in awed silence. Trixie managed to suppress a loud groan of exasperation as the alicorn who stood on the stage spread her wings wide. “My little ponies,” she said, her voice soft, yet firm, perfectly regal yet still carrying a slight hint of embarrassment over her earlier distraction – albeit one that she had managed to turn into an impressive display of her magical power. “Your Princess of the Night has arrived.”
The applause was just shy of instantaneous. Princess Luna beamed at it, offering her best royal smile. After a moment, she raised a hoof for silence, tucking her wings against her body once more.
“This imminent night carries deep meaning,” she said. “It is a time of endings, and a time of beginnings. Since the height of summer, the days have been growing shorter and colder, the world withering as the leaves died and had to be taken from the trees. The last harvest was taken in as the pegasi began the three months of winter. The first snowfall sealed the fields from the light of the sun and moon, and the cold hardened the ground and turned the water into ice. The old year is dying, and tonight it shall finally pass on, consigned to the realm of memory.
“But take heart, my little ponies. Though this year passes, a new one is to begin tonight. The days shall grow longer and warmer, the snow shall melt, the ground will soften, and the earth shall once more become receptive to your care, stronger and better for having had the winter time to rest. Tonight the old year dies, but we do not grieve for it, for its passing makes way for the new year, and the endless possibilities that year contains.” She smiled. “I walked amongst you tonight, disguising myself as pegasus and as unicorn and as earth pony. I spoke with many of you, danced with a few of you, shared food and drink and laughter. And from all of this, my little ponies, from your character and your actions, I have reached a decision about this nascent, incoming new year: it shall be a good one.”
The collected ponies looked amongst each other, smiling. More than a few were blushing furiously, likely being ponies that Luna had interacted with while in disguise and even now mortified at the things they may have done or said – but happy, nonetheless, for Luna, the Princess, the Shepherd of the Moon and the Caretaker of the Sun, had just blessed the new year due to their actions.
Luna’s smile never faltered. “Now then,” she said, turning to look at a mint green unicorn, wearing a white-and-gold dress and who was holding a lyre in her magical grip, “I believe a little music is in order for what comes next.”
Lyra stared blankly for a moment, before realizing what Luna was asking. She nodded as professionally as she could, before settling down into a position that looked back-breakingly uncomfortable to most ponies, hooves at the ready. At a nod from Luna, she began to pluck her lyre, horn glowing to amplify the sound – and to provide backup music despite the lack of a band. To Trixie’s surprise, the sound that came out wasn’t the national anthem at all, but was instead something far simpler in arrangement.
Luna nodded approvingly, before turning back to the ponies. “Close your eyes,” she said, as her horn glowed and midnight energy washed from it like a wave over them. The ponies obeyed, and instantly they were no longer in the auditorium – they were outside, high above Ponyville, standing in the sky as Luna spread her wings wide. Behind her, to the west, the sun slipped down beyond the horizon, the last of its light disappearing, and for a brief moment everything was utterly black.
Then in the east, the first sliver of silver light appeared on the horizon. The sliver widened, becoming a beam, then a wide ray, before finally a silver, full sphere began to rise from the horizon, bathing the entire countryside in soft light. Everypony gasped at the sight, though any further reactions were cut short as Luna leapt, appearing atop the rising moon. Despite the distance, everypony could see her clearly as she stood there, utterly still as she guided the moon fully over the eastern horizon, before leaping again – but this time, not alone. From behind the moon, following her, came a million points of light, following her like a wave as her mane and tail flared with magic along with her horn. Luna began dancing amongst the sky – hopping, skipping, twirling and spinning, a deep, primal dance as the stars chased her across the sky. She would wave her hoof and string up dozens at a time, swing her mane and imprint them in the patterns of the familair constellations. The stars would move of their own accord as well, twirling around her body as though trying to embrace her, and sometimes she would let them, holding them all close before releasing them against the sky one more.
Nopony knew exactly how long they watched Luna dance. Eventually, the stars following her began to thin out, until finally only one was left. This one, she placed firmly above all the rest in the north, nuzzling it before drifting away, back to the awestruck ponies. As she landed, the ponies found the world fading back to normal – they were once again in the auditorium just as Lyra brought the musical accompaniment of Luna’s moonrise and star dance to a close.
Silence prevailed for several long moments, before Luna bowed, wings spread wide. That set off the Ponyvillians, and it was surprising that the entire town hall didn’t come crashing down from the force of their hoof-stomps. Luna smiled widely.
Trixie, meanwhile, let out that exasperated groan she’d been holding back, since it wouldn’t be heard over the sound of the ponies anyway.
“Great,” she said in a low voice as she turned around. “That’s the act I have to follow…”
"You think I can't do my job? You think that Raindrops is just going to fail at something she's done her whole life? YOU'RE WRONG! Because you see, Trixie, you're not dealing with the average weather pony anymore. I've risen above to become the stuff of legend - the legend you fear! I have become A SUPER WEATHER PONY!"
i41.tinypic.com/2uhmsxt.png
"KAIO-CUMULUS!"
brilliant!
You continue to enthral me with this... Enthralling story. Nice work, I really enjoy it . Nice to see everything working out for Trixie, and I want something bad to happen to Applejack, like say a storm cloud *Mysteriously* Setting fire to the barn
hrm... i'm surprised raindrops didn't leave the stormcloud over trixie's house
as a lingering threat of sorts
361264
Ooh, shoulda' done that...
did you see the new epesode yet, raindrop was the first to bite-it on there first atemped at the tornado.
361285
My characterization of Raindrops is very different from the TV show's...
...to be fair, though, I selected her pretty much based on her Viking costume and created her personality around that and a few Fan images of her in it, plus the vector of her lying down and looking annoyed.
She doesn't seem to have much of an accepted fan personality, so I just went with what I thought would be funniest.
Continuing excellence, as always. I look forward to the next part.
361029
The legend has arrived! Taste my Kamehameha!
What would a cutie mark look like on a saiyan, anyway? Worlds exploding?
I was really surprised here. I thought we'd get Coronis to show but Luna pulls a fast one on me once again. Really nice dance she put on for her subjects.
Now, what happens next? Trixie and Luna discussing the night? Or Coronis coming in and blaze them away? Looking forward to it!
361341
Depends on the Saiyan, I guess. Goku's would probably be...a monkey's tail poking out of Nimbus. This makes sense as he would have earned it before he knew what a Saiyin is, so his cutie mark is going to symbolize his younger years.
Vegeta's would be...that bling necklace that King Vegeta wore to symbolize the fact that he was king. Vegeta was pretty proud of being the Prince of All Saiyins.
Broly's would be teardrops made from blood. "KAKAROT...!"
Heh. Coming up with cutie marks for DBZ characters is fun. Cell's would be a perfect circle...Frieza's would be a planet cracking open, yes...Cooler's would be two short wooden planks, because I secretly suspect that Cooler was an idiot, and by "secretly" I mean "I bring it up all the God-damned time."
And now Trixie performs a magic show......
I wanna read it now!
Love the implied dynamics between Luna and Trixie here.
Oh, I should probably mention this because it's not going to be very easy to convey until I get to "Crisis on Two Equestrias," but this Princess Luna is taller than Mane Luna but shorter than Mane Celestia.
Hang on, let me toss something together lickity-split...
i44.tinypic.com/2jfyw0h.png
(I like using "mane." It's punny).
361657 "Crisis on Two Equestrias"? YES!
361657 Any reason you didn't just make her Celestia's height?
Luna's dance among the stars was beautiful. And her forgetting her cue, funny. Applejack, shut up. And felt a bit sad at Trixie being alone, there.
An extremely well written piece. You've done a very good job of altering the personalities of Canon ponies by just a smidgen to make them somewhat antagonistic without pulling a complete personality 180. You've done a good job of showing how Applejack and Rainbow Dash's hard headed canon nature could make them less then agreeable ponies, with Rarity and Pinkie Pie being well natured but annoying. And of course, Fluttershy could never be an antagonist.
Now about the bit with the CMC becoming the bullies and Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon becoming the victims. That is unlikely. But, I would think that in this world, the group of fillies that befriend the Elements of Harmony would be different. Sure, the CMC probably exist as a group, but why would we focus in them, seeing as their connection to this story's mane six are tenuous. This new group would have a similar dynamic to theCMC, but the members would likely be as follows.
Snips and Snails: Essentialy Scootaloo split into two, they idolize Trixie the way Scoots idolizes Dash, though since Trixie is less of a jerk in this universe, this would be a positive thing.
Dinky Doo: The Sweetie Belle of the group, having inherited a bit of her mother's spaciness.
Twist: Possibly Bon Bon's apprentice, Twist never seemed to hang out with Applebloom after she recieved her cutie mark. It could be her special talent at sweet making prompted the apprenticeship, causing Twist to come to look up to Lyre due to Bon Bon's influence. This causes Applebloom to start blowing Twist off, still resenting the Element Weilders due to all the bad blood with the Apple Family you've set up. Thus, Twist makes friends out of the other three.
This creates a three group dynamic between the CMC, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, and this new group, who for the sake of writing I will call the Fanon Crusaders. The Fanon Crusader would be "against" one of the two other groups, with the final being a neutral third party. If they are hostile with the CMC due to the Fanon Crusaders loving the Elements and the CMC being connected to the canon elements who were rubbed the wrong way most (Rainbow Dash insulted, Applejack usurped, and Rarity spurned), then Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon would be neutral because the Fanon Crusaders all have Cutie Marks. If Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are the antagonists, then I imagine the CMC would simply avoid the Fanon Crusaders, though I'd imagine they'd still take their side against Diamond and Silver should the chance arise.
As for the other antagonists, a bit of speculation...
Gilda: Still an ass, and probably a co-antagonist alongside Rainbow for that episode.
Blueblood: The letter seems to imply his time in Ponyville humbled him, so any unpleasantness that arises from dealing with him would probably be related to him being bitter and unpleasant rather then snobby and unpleasant. Probably not antagonistic, but it'd be a bit crushing to talk to him, in a blunt "the image of me you've built up is a complete work of fiction" sort of way, but that could be a lesson about unrealistic expectations.
Flim and Flam: In your blog, you used these two as an example of ponies being less trusting, and perhaps the lack of gullibility among customers forced them to deal fairly. In which case, they might team up with Carrot Top to break the monopoly. Or, they could team up with the Apples to try and run the bolder every day minor farmers out of business for good.
Diamond Dogs: I don't see why any member of this Mane Six would be out searching for gems, and with no Spike (still wondering what this universe version is like) the Diamond Dogs would have little connection to the story. You may want to skip them.
I'm also wondering what kind of sun based holiday will replace Nightmare Night. Whatever you devise, I do hope Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie get their's in that episode. I found their behavior rather asinine.
Keep up the good work!
362203
On Blueblood:
That was the former Baron, Duke Blueblood. Prince Blueblood is Duke's grandson, if he's in this universe at all (hint: he is, though I'm saving that for a thoroughly comedic oneshot tentatively titled either "Trees" or "The Jam Must Flow").
This is based off of a joke that I *wanted* to happen (but it never did) in "the Best Night Ever," which was to have Prince Blueblood revealed to not even be a real prince, "Prince" just being his name, not his title.
In this universe, his family holds the inherited title of Baron, which is actually pretty low amongst the ranks of nobility. On Duke's retirement, the title has passed to his son, whatever his name is. Since Prince is Duke's grandson, he doesn't hold the title of Baron himself, yet, but it is acknowledged that he will one day by giving him the informal title of na-Baron. Prince's full name and title, then, would be na-Baron Prince Blueblood.
And between the proposed title for the oneshot above, the term na-Baron, and the unnecessarily complicated situation, clever readers (or at least Frank Herbert fans) might see what I'm planning now with that oneshot.
361790
Didn't seem right for some reason. She still towers over most ponies, in any event.
361790
Well, I assume she's still the younger sister, here.
361790
i've ever been under the impression that an alicorn's size is proportional to their power. at least in terms of magic
and magic in equestria seems to be at odds with the user's personality
-- twilight, the extreme introvert, has extremely overt magic
-- trixie, the spectacular extrovert, has remarkably subtle magic
-- rarity, who's obsessive nature will not let her do anything else if that one thing isn't perfect, has been shown doing half a dozen things at once without blinking via magic
-- lyra (as shown here), who seems to want to blend into the background, has magic to make herself and her music more noticeable
-- nightmare moon, who was extremely confident in herself, had shapeshifting magic
therefore it follows that celestia, who rules with a whisper, would have stronger magic than luna, who shows up herself to tell (read: order) you that halloween (nightmare night) should be thanksgiving ("a bright and glorious feast") from now on
Well, that's a relief. I thought something terrible was going to happen, like Corona showing up at the Longest Night Celebration! Good to see that Princess Luna is in control and nothing can possibliy go wrong.
I really like the way you've depicted the Apple family here - again, it's not too hard to believe Applejack acting this way.
Ten bits says that the leader of the weather mercenaries has three basketballs as his cutie mark. I hate that guy. Everypony hates that guy.
Lovely description of raising the moon and stringing up the stars!
362807 I have no idea where you got that Bigger=More powerful, but that personality/magic comparison is very interesting. I never thought of it like that, and now that you've pointed it out I'm really intrigued.
363051
the size comparison thing comes mostly from the end of the second episode. when the elements of harmony took away nightmare moon's power she went from being taller than celestia to only slightly larger than other ponies
Very good. Looking forward to more.
Congratulations, your stories have made me stay up way too late. Again.
I can't wait for the next part! Trixie has a long ways to go until she's the mostly-amenable pony we see in Boast Busted. There are a few ways I can see you taking the Gathering Of The Elements.
Great writing, keep 'em coming!
366883
eh, at the end of the day luna's still a goddess, which means she's frighteningly powerful in any case.
hrm... i hadn't considered it as a persistent mental trait in all ponies... i'l have to ponder that...
367665
The inclusion of the original mane six in large roles was largely a result of a complaint I got in the comments of "Boast Busted" about how Twilight needed more screen time and insight into her motivation, on the basis of the fact that because we know who Twilight is in the mane universe, so it's important to understand how Lunaverse Twilight is distinct. I didn't agree with the idea for "Boast Busted," but for a "first episode" of sorts that is this fic, I agree with the sentiment; I think it's important to see all the original Mane Six here, if only to see what they're like in this universe.
Remember that I also would love to turn this into a shared universe, and because of that it's important to get as many basic character personalities down as possible for the first outing.
Still, it's worth noting that I never intended to turn the Mane Six into background ponies; that was just a reader assumption of what I was doing based on how "Boast Busted" played out and the fact that I drew the Lunaverse Six from background ponies (plus Trixie). Were this a TV series, mind, they would be largely background ponies, but in these fics I've always intended them to be recurring presences (I don't want to use the phrase "antagonist," since they won't always be in antagonist roles), much as how Lyra or Ditzy Doo often have larger roles in fics than they've ever had in the show. Applejack, especially, was going to be showing up in several planned fics.
In any event, at least insofar as this fic is concerned, their roles are pretty much done at this point.
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mmm... yeah, I can see what you mean... but I feel like it'd be better if you did that primarily with new episodes drawn from these six's personalities, instead of translations of the original episodes.
Also, you better not make Fluttershy an antagonist personality. Rainbow and Applejack make sense... to a degree. but Pinkie and Fluttershy(though mostly Fluttershy) shouldn't really be used as antagonists.
I haven't made it past chapter 2, yet. I try but it makes me go yerg every time I read applejack.
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Perhaps antagonist is the wrong word, but Fluttershy can certainly serve as an obstacle to overcome, an antagonist not through deliberate will but rather by her intentions (or lack thereof) clashing with whatever the protagonists are trying to accomplish.
She's served such a role in the series already; in fact, we just had an episode like that ("Hurricane Fluttershy"). She also filled a similar role in "Dragonshy."
The trick is that this Fluttershy utterly lacks the Flutterbitch aspect of her personality, which is actually a bad thing.
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actually haven't gotten around to seeing hurricane fluttershy yet. I saw it was another Fluttershy/ Rainbow episode, and just went "Ehhh..."
Don't get me wrong, I love both characters, and they have an interesting dynamic... but... It's just not my favorite interaction. Fluttershy is best pony, sure, but her and Dash just get boring.
And... I can see what you mean. I guess that makes sense... but if Fluttershy isn't IN the group it's hard to justify her being there if her meekness is going to cause problems.
I honestly am considering removing my track for this story(which I auto gave after boast busted) and just following YOU to wait for either an episode that isn't overdone in AUs or a "new" episode based on the new characters traits. (obviously these 6 would have problems the mane cast doesn't, just as you couldn't really have a "lesson zero" moment for Trixie, or a "putting your hoof down" for Ditzy)
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If you like. I advise at least reading through the end of part one (the first four chapters) before making that decision, though.
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I probably will read it all, but before then I'll need to finish reading FoE-PH, Silent Ponyville, and any of my tracking stories that update in the meantime. Because while I will read this eventually... it could take a while.
Hah, so I'm guessing that the earth pony Trixie sent off to find Lyra was Luna?
Also, Luna's three races split trick was really cool.
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The key thing to that was the earth pony combining last, or at least that's what Luna intended. Looking at an alicorn, it's easy to assume that they're essentially just half-unicorn, half-pegasus, leaving earth ponies in the lurch. So when Luna "collected herself," she made a point of combining the unicorn and pegasus ponies first, which gave her the horn (and thus spells) of a unicorn and the wings (and weather powers) of a pegasus.
But the earth pony part is what gave her the taller, more robust build of an alicorn, and more importantly her signiture wavy mane and tail, strongly suggesting that it's via earth pony magic, or something like it, that she gains the ability to control the sun, moon, and stars. Even if that's not true, it certainly visually gets the point across that earth ponies, pegasi, and unicorn are fully, equally represented in her being.
...
...oh, also, yes, Luna is now 30 siver bits richer thanks to Trixie.
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Oh, the mystery mare in Sugarcube Corner back in Chapter 3 was Luna too, wasn't she? Clever. She should have been a unicorn, though.
Loved Luna's fusion, and your description of her dance as she raises the moon and the stars was wonderful! And you're doing a good job by not slavishly following the original pilot, too.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE your use of Luna's shapeshifting powers. The idea of her appearing as a unicorn and a pegasus and an earth pony and then fusing thus emphasizing an alicorn's nature as " all 3 pony races in one , existing simultaneously" is a wonderful touch of symbolism.
Show-off.
Such a gigantic show-off.
And Corona missed her cue; doesn't she know she was supposed to prevent the setting of the sun? If she shows up during the night, everypony will realize that she couldn't have just escaped, since she'd be on the other side of the world, and will ask why she didn't start the eternal day earlier, and be suitably unimpressed. She's basically missed her entire chance to make a proper dramatic entrance to cancel the longest night, and all other nights. She might be able to work something at dawn and still ride on the significance of the date a bit, but quite possibly what she should be aiming for is "midday on some arbitrary day" unless she wants to wait another year.
Well it looks like the Longest Night festival is going rather well, a few angry ponies aside, I must say that Luna's power to split into three ponies is interesting, through it does make me wonder what the down sides of such a ability would be.
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Think of the benefits instead!
i.imgur.com/8d60ZKg.png
Nice scene there with Luna forgetting her cue totally was expecting corona to come in and ruin the night. Lunas dance with the stars was also very...entertaining. poor telcos though all by herself.
Luna setting up the sky... amazing... I was picturing it in my head. That needs to be animated.
I mean, Twilight was impressed when seeing Celestia raise the Sun? HA! That has NOTHING compared to what it would be seeing Luna setting up the sky and stars and the Moon.
This is what I love a good alt verse for, the unexpected. We EXPECT that this is when Corona will show up, because that is what happens in the show. We EXPECT Trixie to be alone and ok with it because that is how Twilight acted, and we EXPECT some of the ponies to be a little close to Twilight because that is what happened in the show. Not here.
Here we actually get to see the celebration and it is glorious! I wonder how Tia managed the stars without Luna, maybe made them boring. Ilove Lyra's song here and for some odd reason, Constellations was playing in my head. I also loved how some of Trixie's plans went wrong, because that is who she is. She has a giant ego and it shows, yet...yet, I can't but see the deep pain she is feeling. She feels like she doesn't have friends because she knows her own faults well, she knows that they don't want to be with an egotist like her. Again, different from our Twily, who figured "I don't really need friends. I have Shining, Cadence, and Spike. That's it, who needs more?"
Wow! The celebration actually happened, and Luna made quite an intro so out of left-field. Totally awesome and original!
Considering the fact that the sun is just a really close-by star, it makes you wonder sometimes... just how underwhelming Tia's celebrations were...
ya
__________
yer / you're
___________
And now to see Trixie's show. I should probably go to bed soon. But this fic is such an amazing kick off to the best AU out there.
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Nice job
VegetaRaindrops!This truly is a good start to the whole thing. And is a much better start to things compared to the cannon S1 E1.
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Same errors as last time.
I personally love this chapter. It's one of the better one's in this particular fic and really sets up nicely what's going to happen next.
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Same Errors as last time.