My Immortal

by Twitch the Fox

Chapter 6

There was an eerie silence as we walked side-by-side. He walked with a kind of stature; a kind of power that seemed to make all the other ponies look at him and smile. He himself was wearing a small grin on his face. As I watched him, I began to wonder: why me? What was so mystical or enticing about me that he would want to spend more time with me? Me, who hadn’t been out of the house in weeks, and falls asleep while eating toast. But he seemed so sure and confident. Perhaps I was just over thinking this. It’s just coffee, right? I’ve had coffee casually with plenty of ponies! Of course, I haven’t since…
“Here we are!” He interrupted.
“Oh!” I replied, startled, “So we are!” He trotted ahead of me, and pulled out my chair for me. What a gent. I took my seat, and watched him take his seat across from me. We waited for a moment, taking a quick glance at our menus. After skimming the restaurant’s selections, Mrs. Cake approached our table, with a smile.
“Hello, everypony! What’ll it be today?” she said cheerfully. She turned to me first, so I figured I should give my order first.
“I will have a cup of coffee with a donut, please.” I said plainly
“Of course, dear!” Mrs. Cake replied. “And for you, Doctor?”
“Just a cup of tea, please.” Funny. I didn’t even see that on the menu.
“Do you come here often?” I asked the Doctor. “They know your name.”
“On occasion.” He replied. “This has become my favorite café in Ponyville since I came here. Very small, very quaint, and fantastic tea!” he said, right as Mrs. Cake came and delivered our orders: my coffee and donut, and his tea. “Thank you, Mrs. Cake!” he says, as he pays her a few bits.
I slowly sipped my coffee and nibbled on the donut, and watched him sip his tea.
“mmm,” I said, “this is quite good!”
“Indeed it is!” he responded with a kind of pep in his voice.
Again, we sat in silence for some time. How could it be that I had completely forgotten how to properly interact with other ponies? I felt that I needed to start something; spark conversation somehow. It’s the least I could do to repay him for the coffee and donut.
“So, Doctor” I spat out, “why did you decide to come to ponyville?” It’s not much, but it’s something.
“To be truthful, I just sort of wound up here. I had lived all over: Fillydalphia, Manehatten, Las Pegasus, and even some places in Germaney. I was getting bored with the big city life; always getting shunted from place to place, so many ponies, so little time. So, I hopped on the train and rode until I would up here. I know it sure sounds like a cliché ran-away-from-home story, but it’s all true!”
He then paused to sip his tea again.
“When I exited the train, I was immediately charmed by the town’s homey feel, it’s sense of community and togetherness, that I decided to settle down here. I consulted mayor mare about job opportunities, and she offered me a position as a runner, delivering vitally important notices and memos that the post can’t get to in time.”
Then, as if on clockwork he took another sip of his tea. After he finished his gulp, he looked at me and said,
“But enough about me. Tell me about yourself, Mrs. Octavia! What is your position in this wonderful little town?”
“Well,” I started, “I play cello in the Canterlot Symphony. I have for a number of years. When it is not concert season, I live a slow life, giving private music lessons for the most part.”
“Ah, music!” he said grandly. “Such a wonderful art form!”
“Indeed it is.” I said back, plainly, not quite sure how else to respond. “Do you play anything?”
“I used to play a bit of trumpet, but that was many-a years ago. I’ve long since put that part of me aside.”
“It is rather unfortunate that you stopped. Music in colt-hood is something that most ponies wish they had. Half of my private lesson students are adults hoping to learn a bit of music that they had never learned when they were fillies. I try my best to help them, but many of them get frustrated and quit within the first few lessons. It is a very sad sight to see.”
“Is that right? I would have never guessed. I guess I do miss music, but there is simply not enough hours in the day for it. I’m busy rushing around town delivering fines and court summons.”
The town hall bell town then chimed, and the clock tolled 2 o’clock.
“Speaking of which,” Dr. Whooves said, “I need to get down to the hospital to deliver these papers before it’s too late.”
He then gulped down the rest of his tea and rose from his seat. I did the same, and met him alongside the table.
“Thank you for accompanying me to lunch, Octavia. I had a wonderful time.”
“I did as well, Doctor.” I said with a small smile.
“Octavia, I would love to be your company again sometime in the near future.” He stated while picking up his papers. “Where might I find you, were we to spend more time together?”
“I am located in-between Town Square and the market place. It is a fairly distinctive building; it’s hard to miss.” I said back to him.
He scribbled something (presumably the house details) on a note pad, and then said,
“Excellent! I will stop bye sometime soon and pay you a visit. Until then, Auf Wiedersehen, Ms. Octavia!”
I gave a small giggle and said back to him, “Au revior, Doctor Whooves!” and we then went our separate ways.
. . .
As I walked back to my home, I began to think about what had just happened. Interaction with ponies was always such an infrequent event that analyzing the situation was appropriate. I hadn’t been social for so long, the conversation felt forced and crude, but at the same time, had a bit of a flow to it. He was a likeable colt; a gentleman at that. He seemed interested in what I had to say, and I was, in turn, interested in what he had to say. What he had to say was interesting, and he made an effort to keep the conversation alive. I enjoyed this afternoon. One may even say that I was, if not for a moment, happy.
It had been so long since I had felt this way; I had almost forgotten what happiness felt like. It was blissful. It was exciting. It was addicting. As I walked slowly back to my house, I silently cursed the fact that our small conversation couldn’t last longer. He was the first colt in months that I had felt this way toward. He actually made me feel happy.

Comments

[CodenameTobias]

*Sees title* Here we go... *Reads* Not bad. My only real gripe here are a few minor editing things. As mentioned in a previous comment, you may want to put spaces between each paragraph to tidy it up a little. Also, there are a few sentences that I feel can be tied together (personal opinion) and the first five chapters can be tied together into one. You've really got something here, all you need is a bit of editing done. Keep up the good work!

[toastman]

That title makes me think of Harry Potter for some reason. Can't imagine why...

[AdmiralPopeyesBeard]

This wasn't actually too bad. Some bad writing here and there, but not too bad. I kind of liked it.
Looking forward to reading more of this story as it's posted.

[firepony]

Really nice story and everything is going well but i spotted one mistake when they said goodbye to each other she called him doctor whooves but he did not say anything about whooves as the seccond part of his name but he said just doctor

[MidnightBlade753]

Wait a sec....No one is acknowledging the fact that the title image’s quote is referencing RWBY?