Final Gift

The time has come for Rainbow Dash to say goodbye. But she wasn't prepared. And she knew she never would be, even for years to come.

Her "little sister", Scootaloo, has one last day to live, and the day had gone by so fast. The horrible disease, leukemia, was constantly draining the energy out of the young filly. Rainbow Dash was not prepared to say goodbye, she never wanted to. Scootaloo was one of her best friends, her biggest fan, the first pony she'd ever considered as a sister, the first she'd took under her wing.

And now she was going to leave. Forever. Rainbow Dash would no longer be able to see the filly's bright smile that could light up even the darkest of days, would no longer have a number one fan to hang out with, would no longer have a friend she could consider a younger sister.

She looked at her number one fan's weak state. The doctors had given permission for Scootaloo to have a day out of the hospital one last time, and Rainbow Dash was going to make it awesome, even as awesome as she was, maybe even better.

“C'mon Squirt, let’s go,” Rainbow attempted to joke by calling Scootaloo by the nickname Rainbow had given her as she wheeled her sister's wheelchair out of the hospital. They both went to a park. Some ponies were staring at them and giving them weird looks but neither Rainbow Dash nor Scootaloo cared. Scootaloo’s final day on Equestria was not going to be ruined by the ponies who knew nothing about her. Not if Rainbow could help it.

The duo were strolling around for quite a while. Rainbow Dash didn't even know why she had gone there so early, perhaps she was just so worried Scootaloo would pass before she could show her what she had intended to.

At the same time as they were walking, though, Rainbow Dash could not help but daydream to herself a little bit. Dream for the day she and Scootaloo could meet again. They could fly together forever, side by side. It would be the best day ever, Rainbow Dash thought to herself.

Though she was trying to comfort herself with those thoughts, she could not help but pity Scootaloo at the same time. The filly still had a huge life ahead of her, she hadn't even gotten her cutie mark. Beneath those small, orange feet should have been a trampoline, a field, a rainbow, anything but a wheelchair footrest. Seeing the pony she'd known as a strong, determined filly who never gave up reduced to such a state of weakness shattered Rainbow Dash's heart to dust.

At last, night came. Everypony else had already left the park, leaving just Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo there by themselves.

The night was quiet and peaceful. It was dark, save for a few lights from houses and buildings. A gentle breeze was blowing into Rainbow's mane. This could've easily be one of her favourite nights, if not for the fact Scootaloo would leave her forever.

“Rainbow Dash…It’s time we returned to the hospital,” Scootaloo uttered softly. Rainbow Dash looked at the little filly's pale face, and shook her head stubbornly.

“No, Squirt, there’s one last gift I have to give you. I must…” Rainbow’s voice trailed off as she ruffled the magenta mane of the filly, though more to comfort herself more than Scootaloo. She knew that Scootaloo wanted to die comfortably in the soft bed of the hospital but Rainbow Dash was determined to go to one more place before Scootaloo was gone forever. Rainbow Dash wheeled Scootaloo’s wheelchair to a stop at the bottom of a small hill. There was a bench and that was where Rainbow Dash sat down and locked Scootaloo’s wheelchair beside her.

“Look up,” Rainbow Dash whispered softly to the pony beside her. Scootaloo did so and she was fascinated by the sight she beheld. Millions of stars were sparkling in the sky, like little shining jewels in the distance, gleaming beautifully in the dark, night sky. Though most nights were indeed beautiful, this night seemed exceptionally majestic, as if it was specially made to bid Scootaloo a last farewell. Rainbow Dash put her hoof on Scootaloo’s and squeezed it tightly.

“Rainbow Dash…Thank you,” Scootaloo smiled weakly at her idol. Rainbow Dash smiled back, a tear rolling down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away, remembering her vow never to cry in front of Scootaloo, though this time it wasn't just about her pride. She vowed to always to smile to Scootaloo and to leave her a beautiful memory. Scootaloo looked back up at the sky, enjoying the view tremendously. Rainbow Dash couldn't recall the last time Scootaloo had smiled that way since the disease hit her.

“Scootaloo, I want you to know…to know…that…that…I love you. I will miss you.” Rainbow Dash’s voice cracked as she struggled to say the words to her sister. Now , against her will, more tears were streaming down her cheeks.

“I love…you…too…Sister…” Scootaloo uttered with her final breathe, smiling her sweetest smile, and the hoof that Rainbow Dash was holding went limp. Rainbow Dash grasped Scootaloo’s cold hoof for another few hours while fighting back more tears that threatened menacingly to fall. At last, Rainbow Dash forced a smile as she looked lovingly at her dead sister. Now, after months of pain, Scootaloo finally looked so at peace, so beautiful. She looked as if she was just a sleeping like a baby.

Rainbow Dash leaned her head close to her little sister's, and planted a small, sisterly kiss on the center of her forehead. At the same time, though, Rainbow regretted not showing much affection to the filly while she was still alive and well.

“Goodbye, if we could have a next life…” Rainbow Dash sobbed, “let’s be together as friends, or maybe even real siblings, once more.”

And just at that moment, a shooting star burst forth across the sky not too far away…

Author's Note:

My writing is really bad. I know, but we all start somewhere...Right? I...Just hope I'm not that bad, for a first fanfiction. I'm so sorry for writing a really bad story.

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Comments ( 14 )

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Yamazaki

Yamazaki #1 · Sep 10th, 2013 · · ·

Made me shed a tear.

SolaristigressSolaria

SolaristigressSolaria #2 · Sep 10th, 2013 · · ·

oh the feels...so sad

TadStone

TadStone #3 · Sep 10th, 2013 · 3 · ·

Good basic story idea, although done pretty often with varying charackters. Your writing style is quite OK, but I've got quite a few content-related remarks for you for the next time:

- How did they know Scootaloo was gonna die exactly that day? Or was it that they just had given up on her already and didn't care that strolling around in the park without medication might kill her? Scootaloo seemed to do too good for that until she just dies. Also she would at least need constant pain medication if not much more. Main causes of death for children with Leukemia are:
- hemorrhage: can't really predict this and if you do you would at least try to treat this
- infection: you definitely don't sent out a child with an infection that could yet be conquered if you don't make it worse be wheeling her out of the hospital
- chemotherapy related or transplant related: both are bad surprises in the middle of treatment, you definitely don't just give up
- anemia: treatment till last second, Scootaloo would show severe symptoms
- cardiac arrest and stroke: sudden and unforseen
Anyway, the risk of infections while leaving the hospital would be far to great to even think about allowing it. And I daresay you can't just give up a patient who is still talking freely and is conscious, unless Equestria is the USA and Scootaloo ran out of money...

- Also why look at the stars? Never have Rainbow or Scootaloo shown too much interest in the stars. How about a Sonic Rainboom or a last time flying out? I don't think this day was overly awesome.
- Why has Rainbow not shown affection before her death? I mean she had had a whole day. What did they even do in the park all the time? Dash didn't even talk to Scoots and instead was daydreaming. Fine last hours...
- A dead body doesn't instantly turn cold.
- If it is Scootaloo's last time out, don't have Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle a right to see her at least shortly for a last time? What about Scoot's parents? At least mention she's an orphan or so...

I recommend backing up your next story with more research and a bit more explanations and motivations.
(Sry for just pointing at mistakes, but I just wanted to line out where I think you could improve most. As I said your style is good and others can help you more with this.)

EquesTRON

EquesTRON #4 · Sep 10th, 2013 · 2 · ·

(Aw, man, another story where I'm dying? Why are you "bronies" always killing me off all the time? What'd I ever do to you guys, anyway?)
(Now, Scoot, we talked about this. It''s just a story.)
(Yeah, I know, but I kinda can't help taking it personally, y'know?)

3185078 pretty much covered it, for the most part. Despite what you see in movies and soap operas, people don't actually die on a predictable schedule like that. It's not like the batteries running down in your laptop, where there's a little meter that says "1 hour 37 minutes remaining" and you know exactly how long you've got left until everything shuts down. If someone's condition really has deteriorated to the point that the doctors can state with certainty they won't last another 24 hours, they're going to be much too far gone to be going for a day trip outside the hospital. And yes, it takes time for a body to cool to ambient temperature; that's one of the ways coroners estimate time-of-death in crime-scene investigations.

But... yeah. Leaving aside the merits of the idea itself (which really has been done to death, I'm afraid), 1000 words just isn't enough to really develop a story of this type, and the characters are somewhat out-of-character. Dash would do something awesome like strapping Scootaloo to her back and taking her up for one final flight, maybe even taking her through a Sonic Rainboom so Scoot could see it from the inside, just once.

LeopardCay

LeopardCay #5 · Sep 10th, 2013 · · ·

3185252
(Psst! Hey scoot! I know how ya feel! What I'm thinking right now is; Yay... Another sappy story about me crying infront of ya. But, It will never happen in real life ufcourse since im AWESOME! And I'm t-
(You promised to not brag Dash! But you did, and now your time to write something is over!)