Celestia decides to give human form a try. She asks Shepherd for his opinion

Celestia: "So, how do I look? Did I do it right?" beams

Shepherd: *blush* "Er... It's very good. Extremely good, actually. How do you feel?"

Celestia: "Different... But good." *She studied her hands thoughtfully* "... I can see why inventing fire was so important for you as a species."

Shepherd: "What do you mean?"

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Zephyr: "COME ON YOU HUMAN MOTHER BUCKER! COME ON!"

Shepherd: "... We're not doing this."

Zephyr: "Wha-COME ON! FIGHT ME!"

Shepherd: "You're holding your spear wrong. I'm not fighting you."

Zephyr: "What are you, scared?!"

Shepherd: "That's... Not the word I would choose, no."

Zephyr: "WELL COME ON THEN! FIGHT ME!"

Dash: "Zephyr, come on! I'm happy! Very happy! Don't do this!"

Zephyr: "I must! I love you too much to let you go!"

Dash: "By embarrassing me?! Really?!"

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I was tempted to write a flashback to when Shepherd was in Canterlot. It would show that, no matter how thirsty mares in Ponyville might be over him... The mares in Canterlot were worse.

A unicorn maid grins lustily as she seals the doors and windows.

Shepherd: "Ummm... I kind of need to get to breakfast with the Princess. So if you would please-?"

Maid: "Give me a bushel of foals you hot alien stud, you!"

Shepherd: "... Okay there's been some miscommunication here-"

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The Elements were quite put out over Gabby Gums' articles. Shepherd though was rather unimpressed.

Rarity: "How can you be so blase over this-this atrocity of a column!"

Shepherd: *shrugs* "Do remember I've had much worse, Rarity. I mean, the kingdom's tabloids routinely say I'm some sort of hedonistic monkey who plows every mare and stallion in Equestria."

Rarity: "Yes, yes, but that's all untrue! Just sensationalism! Gabby Gums is publishing real secrets about us!"

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Old Man Shepherd had taken Sunny and her friends to an ancient cavern, far from Maretime Bay.

Hitch: "Uh huh... There a reason we're out here?"

Izzy: "Is it a good reason? Like a secret candy stash? Ugh, two thousand year old candy! Gross!"

Shepherd: "Hang on... I know it was around here somewhere... Aha." He hits a control and a secret passageway slowly opens "There we go."

Sunny: "Oh wow! A secret door?!"

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Shepherd and Twilight talked at length about the situation, and Twilight promised to be supportive of any decision he made. Though she was still hoping it would be her. She was at the very least honest and restrained, so he really appreciated that about her.

She was learning so much. Honestly she had grown up, and he'd helped her. It made him feel very fond of her. Almost as fond as-

Shepherd: "Oh shit."

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In the future, at the Shepherd-Sparkle family table…

Shepherd: "Pass the potatoes please."

Twilight: "Shepherd, did you beat that dragon senseless?"

Shepherd: "He was asking for it. Besides, you took out that alien invader with the sun last week."

Spike: “Honestly Twi, that guy is an asshole.”

Twilight: "Even so! He didn't have to break his tail in ten places!"

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Luna gets a T-shirt with OPPAI on it, and tight shorts-Which do nothing for teenaged Shepherd's hormones. Celestia remains in naked apron mode, though she put on some racy panties. Clearly, both princesses-er, principals-are still massive trolls no matter what universe.

Celestia: "How is your omelet, Shepherd?"

Shepherd: "It's fine..."

Luna: glare "I got the mushrooms especially for you."

Shepherd: "Uh... Thank you?"

Luna: "Hmph."

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The repairs to Canterlot after the Changeling invasion were still taking time, and Shepherd was technically part of the decision makers. So he'd spent the entire day helping with the repairs, directing guard rotations, and filling out reports to hopefully ensure something like this never happened again.

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Shepherd: "So... What are we doing on our date, Rainbow Dash?"

Dash: "Ah... Well, ya know, dates are stupid and romantic and junk. So you just make the decisions there. You want to do mushy stuff and all."

Shepherd: "Okay. How does a trip up to Cloudsdale to the Wonderbolts museum, then dinner at the Skyview Cloud?"

Dash: "Yeah, sure, that sounds pretty okay. I'll need some girly clothes. What do you like?"

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Shepherd: "Hey Twilight? I got your mail for you. Huh, what's this magazine? Predator Fetish Monthly?"

Twilight: bright red, snatches it away with her telekinesis "Th-That's about scientific inquiries into the religious practices of certain predator groups and tribes and definitely not pornographic in any way whatsoever ahahahaha!"

Shepherd: "... Okay?"

Fluttershy: "Hello Twilight! I just got the latest issue!"

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When Shepherd shows "The Little Mermaid" to his Pony friends...

Fluttershy: So... She traded her voice and possibly her soul just for legs? That seems... A bit much.

Twilight: Isn't she a demigoddess? Shouldn't transforming be one of her powers? It's not that hard a spell to learn.

Applejack: Aw ain't sure o' her jest abandonin' her family like this over some guy she ain't even conversed with. Even after her daddy broke her stuff, it's a little too fast fer me.

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When it comes to Hands, I think I'll focus on the short shots for the time being, like "The Stars Revolt" and so on. I need to do some cleanup for the TRON arc. So I think a main focus of those Hands shorts (Or Short Hands, ha) will be on Shepherd in the middle of crisis situations in Equestria. Surprisingly, he tends to stay out of a lot of the drama ponies have.

Spike actually enjoys his company as they both commiserate on how nuts ponies can be.

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In a field near the Everfree Forest...

Shepherd and Chewie are fighting furiously, a pitched battle of grit and sheer masculine strength! Shepherd swung his staff, extending it, but the Manticore leaped over it to try and pounce! Shepherd rolled, retracting his staff and swinging it again as hard as he could at Chewie's front paw! Chewie took the hit, but jumped forward to slash at Shepherd! His claws caught on Shepherd's shirt, and the human pulled back, his shirt coming off!

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Shining Armor and Cadence have come to Ponyville to celebrate a human tradition: Thanksgiving. They arrive at Twilight's castle, with the food and music in full swing. Shepherd and Twilight come out to greet them, along with Chrysalis and Fluttershy.

Twilight: "BBBFF! Cadence" *She gallops up and hugs them both* "I'm so glad you could make it!"

Shining: "Well, any chance to see my darling little sister, her friends... And the monkey." *Cadence elbows him* "I mean Shepherd."

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Here is a very stupid omake for if Shepherd had arrived and settled into Ponyville even before Twilight came...

The party for the Summer Sun Celebration was just too damn loud. Shepherd was trying to sleep, damnit! He'd had a long day of getting shit together and he just wanted some sleep! Not that he didn't like Pinkie's parties: He loved them! She was one of the kindest ponies and first to accept him, the strange alien, into their community. But he really needed shut eye.

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Ponies don't have hands; they've got hooves instead.

Source

This is hardly new knowledge, of course. I'm not exactly treading on new ground here.

Warning: lots of YouTube images below the break

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Ponyville was right on the front lines of the conflict. Everywhere Twilight could see evidence of the slaughter. Wounded ponies, wounded soldiers, nurses working overtime in camps. It was terrible to behold.

Pony Soldier: "They're attacking again! GET READY! HEY YOU!"

Twilight: "Ah?!"

Pony Soldier: "If you're a combat mage, help us! We're being-!"

He was grazed by a bullet and fell. A hulking Crystal Empire Trooper loomed over him him, brandishing a pony-style gun.

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