Endings Suck: A roundabout schedule update · 4:41am Aug 21st, 2017
So.
I've been wondering how to write this blog post for the better part of four weeks. I liked the idea of a longer post working out feelings, or musing about the nature of grief, or sharing an experience with a rejected Simpsons couch gag* that became eerily relevant not twelve hours later. I might still do one of those things, but for now there's no way other way to say it than to say it.
My father passed away last month. To the day, in fact.
We saw it coming, it was peaceful, and I'd glad he's not stuck in that crappy bed anymore, and we did all we could. This knowledge should bring comfort, but it doesn't. Not really.
I am now and have been as okay as one can possibly be in this situation. Every now and then a song on the radio will curbstomp my chest into my lungs, and I don't think I'll ever watch Tanks for the Memories** the same way ever again, but by this point I can honestly say I'm as close to fine as possible.
The bottom line of this is The Silver Standard will be delayed until sometime in late September, at the very least.
Not just because I needed space for grieving, but because the chapter itself is intimidating and psyched me out every time I tried to start it. I probably would have taken a month off even under nicer circumstances. It also would be best, I decided, to take some time to reread the entire story to recap on hanging threads, themes, etc. before jumping in to the (probably) penultimate chapter. It didn't help that roughly fifteen hours passed between the last chapter's publication and finding out the news. Some associative stuff probably happened there, too, I dunno, psychology's dumb.
However, taking a complete break wasn't an option, because A) I'd feel guilty as hell on top of everything else and B) writing about horses and their feelings is the best way of working out Patch's feelings.
Long story short, a Silver Standard sidestory is currently in progress. It takes place right after the most recent chapter of Standard left off, concerning the Riches' reaction to the fallout of the schoolboard meeting. In retrospect, this is was really the best possible option. It's both functional as a much needed add-on to the story, and also writing about my OTP is nice for selfish feelings. In all honesty I don't think it's quite as good as Riches Await but in the end, it exists to make me feel better and to fill in some blank spaces.
The side story should be published sometime next week, if not sooner. (If by chance it doesn't, it's be because I decided it steals too much of the next chapter's thunder and will appear alongside the next update.)
Now if only I could give the darn thing a title. Anybody know business terminology for ending patterns and/or good quiche pun?
*I planned on writing a blog post about this rejected couch gag last month anyway, because I had a lot to say about it and still do. But holy fuck, that timing, you guys. If this was a novel I'd say the foreshadowing was overwrought.
**I also want a blog post about this too, down the line. There's a conversation to be had about the way death is handled in children's television as opposed to film. Honestly, the only reason that blog doesn't exist yet is the sidefic ate my time.
I wish I could help you with a quiche pun, but they must be eggcellent.
I'm terribly sorry for your lost. My heart goes out to you.
Can I give you a hug through the screen?
No?
Can you feel hugged then from me, please?
You take as long as you want, mate. Can't speak for everyone, but I will definitely still be here.
My deepest condolences
I went through the same situation a few years ago
1) take your time. your well being takes precedence over horse words.
2) thank you for deciding to share this personal news with us. i cant imagine putting myself out there like that with strangers. (if you can count 6 years of publishing and conversing with internet citizens...)
I'm sorry for your loss. Please, take all the time you need.
My condolences, Patch.
Take all the time you need; grief is messy and individuals work their way through it differently. Your horsewords are lovely, but your life must take precedence.
(Also: squeeee for a confirmed Richs sidestory!
)
Aw man. Take a break. Horsewords can always wait. I'm really sorry to hear of your loss. :(
My sincerest condolences. You know best how to deal with your grief. If it's horseword therapy, then by all means, dive in.
As for the title... Paradigm Shift? (Paradiamond Shift?)
I am sad for your loss. Yet you seem to have had a good father, and to have been on good terms with him. So I am also glad you were both so fortunate.
Sharing grief with strangers is a hard thing and a risk. Thank you for undertaking both for our sake.
My deepest condolences.
As a title for your new story, let me suggest a line from Robert Frost: the trial by market everything must come to.
It resonates nicely with "And yet what riches still await" and, in its original context, seems apposite to your subject.
My condolences. If there is one thing all people have in common, it's that we all lose someone some time. I lost my own father some seven years ago, and I can tell you that although one can reach full acceptance in about a year, one is never quite the same again.
It's good to see you staying strong through this.
As far as business terminology for ending things, all I've really got is this list of euphemisms for firing workers.
But really I posted to say: good thoughts.
My deepest condolences and understanding to you! Please take whatever time you need. We'll wait!
The Quiche of Death?
Lorraine On (possessive pronoun) Parade?
My condolences, please take all the time you need!
Thanks all around for the condolences.
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A smidge too buzzwordy for this story, but if I ever get around to writing that applewood derby story I am ABSOLUTELY calling it Paradigm Drift. If not as a title, then as the name for the cart. Or both.