noise."Story Notes: Paradise by the Dashboard Light · 3:10am Dec 9th, 2023
So how has work been? Well, it's taken me two weeks to post an already-written, already-edited, already-published-in-an-exclusive-con-book story, so I think that's your answer.
But anyway, onto the story notes!
First off, I gotta give praise to my pre-readers (there'll be a little more about that later). AlwaysDressesInStyle did the initial pre-read, followed by Sonicsuns, and Vivid Syntax. Yay!
Coverart is the default art designed and drawn by Alsey, who I don't have a link for (sorry Alsey)—if anyone does, put it in the comments and I'll add it 
For the ponies, wow there's a lot of them. The titular character is of course Paradise, who (according to the wiki) is the resident storyteller of the G1 ponies: she "knows a great deal of legends, stories, riddles, and lore." Maybe that's why I find her such an interesting character.
Or maybe it's her beguiling green eyes.
As for the rest, I'm gonna be lazy and just link to a previous comment where I gave pictures of all of them. Long-time readers of mine will remember them, I'm sure; they're the tornado ponies in Silver Glow's Journal, also appearing in Starbucks as an ensemble, as well as a smaller subset in Shamrock Shake and and Velvet Light flying solo (proverbially) in 189 No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service.
The humans are mostly all characters from the movie Twister. The only exception is Mr. Dove who comes from a different movie, but I'm not gonna tell you which one.
As for the story title, that's a song by Meatloaf. Not really thematically connected with the story, if you're familiar with the song. Incidentally, it's not the only Meatloaf song reference I sneaked into Ciderfest; one of my app stories was titled "I Would Do Anything For Love."
While most of the places in the story do really exist, I drew the line at a place to be destroyed by a tornado. That having been said, there was a town called Babbs Switch in Oklahoma, right where I described. It no longer exists, although there is a stone marker at the location of the former school, which burned in a tragic fire in 1924.
Fun fact: originally, the town was going to be Lugert, which is nearby. Much of the town was destroyed by a tornado in 1912, and then it was flooded by a dam in 1927 or so.
Source (Yes, I've used that image in a blog before, but I love it very much)
For those of you who don't have them, tornadoes are a concentrated funnel of Mother Nature's wrath, and they can reach mind-boggling extremes. The largest single tornado-producing storm had 219 of them in a 24 hour period; the Tri-State Tornado travelled over 219 miles (352km) through three states; the widest tornado on record was 2.6 miles (4.1km) in width; the fastest tornado on record had wind speeds of 302 mph (515km/h), and the fastest forward movement of a tornado was 73mph.
Their destruction is rated on the Enhanced Fujita Scale, with EF-0 being 'it's very windy' and EF-5 being utter destruction. To quote the National Weather Service, damage from a EF-5 tornado is "Strong frame houses lifted off foundations and carried considerable distances to disintegrate; automobile sized missiles fly through the air in excess of 100 meters; trees debarked; steel reinforced concrete structures badly damaged." In theory, EF-6 tornadoes are possible, however since the Fujita scale largely relies on damage on the ground, 'complete destruction' and 'even more complete destruction' look a lot alike.
Earlier this year, a tornado hit north of me, and I've seen some of the swath of destruction (woodlots are only sticks now, houses damaged, barns destroyed, and at least 17 semis were flipped on the highway, and that was only an EF-2). Unlike hurricanes, while storms that can produce tornadoes can be identified in advance, the tornadoes themselves often arrive with little warning. Many municipalities in tornado-prone areas have warning sirens which are sounded when a tornado is coming, and for those who live in those areas, it's terrifying to hear all the sirens screaming as the sky is turning black or green and the clouds are starting to circle.
(Or if you're a grizzled Tornado Alley veteran, you can just go out on your porch and crack open a cold one, 'cause whatever's about to happen is gonna be epic.)
Point is, any data we humans can get to better predict and/or mitigate tornado damage is worth it, and maybe the ponies can help us with that.
The next part is going to be some behind-the-scenes stuff you might not want to know (i.e., how the sausage story is made), so you can skip ahead to the next pony picture if you choose!
I'd had the broad idea of the story since well before I decided I could use it for Scattered Pages, and of course most of the research had been done previously, which saved a lot of time. There's something I just love about the tornado ponies; they're cute and pastel and go out flying in weather that would make any pilot turn in his license. I did some research at EFNW and started writing the story then, continuing on the airplane ride home.
Over the course of edits, the story focus changed (in a large part due to Sonicsuns' suggestions), which means that ultimately out of of the original 15k story, only about 2k words actually got used in the published version. It's easy to go on and on (and y'all know I do that) when publishing online, but when it's in actual book format it needs to be cut down to the essentials.
I actually do need to publish a blog post about that specifically at some point; during some downtime at the PVCF bookstore I was editing a different story of mine, and a fellow writer stopped by and asked what I was doing. By the general context of the conversation, I think he tends to plan out what he's gonna write and takes time before he sets words on the page to know what he's gonna say and how. Since I'm a discovery writer, I just come up with the barest idea and start writing it to see what happens, then fix whatever I need to later on. In actual fact, one of my recently-published stories is version 3 of the original; over the course of the brainstorming/writing/editing process it changed location and characters and theme entirely and the only thing that remained the same was Home Depot.
Anyway, that's just a long-winded way of saying that sometime next year, once all this Misgiving madness is over with, y'all will be getting the Author's Cut of Paradise which is going to be significantly longer.
As I've transitioned to a mostly PoE writer, one thing I've always paid attention to at cons is how pony-friendly various hotels are. Of those I've stayed in recently, the Mariott at the University of Dayton is most pony friendly (it's got big showers and a balcony for pegasi), with the Grand Hotel in Ocean City coming in a close second (balcony for pegasi, but bathroom is less pony-friendly).
Coffee makers are less pony-friendly; sometimes not even human-friendly. The hotel that I stayed at on my way to PVCF had a two-cup coffee maker that technically made two cups, but one was full and the other was only half-full.
In what can be considered perfect timing, one of the books my parents gave me during our pan-birthday celebration was how to survive stuff, and they had a chapter on tornadoes, which gave me some additional terminology I didn't know. Inflow tails are the section of warm, humid air feeding the tornado (I think), while the dry line is the boundary between humid air and dry air; while it also applies to larger weather patterns, my understanding is with tornados it's really the difference between 'it might miss us' and 'it's too late to run.'
Speaking of tornado survivability, Dusty's right that a car might seem safe; it's made of metal and has airbags and seat belts and stuff, and a tornado laughs at that.
That was a pickup or SUV (there's not enough left of it for me to confidently identify it, but the fuel tank location and wheels make me think F250 or F350). Bridges aren't good cover either; if you're caught outside, lie down flat in the lowest spot you can find (ditches are ideal, although watch out for them rapidly filling with water) and cover your head. If you are in a house, stay in the basement or the lowest floor of the house away from windows, under something sturdy if possible. Bathtubs are an option and may protect you from falling debris.
"It's what pegasi were born to do."
—AlwaysDressesInStyle
I would be fascinated to know what the start was and how it ended up to what we got.
This was a fun read, both story and notes.
I hear you on the work part. Things have been too busy for too few people.
I hope things ease up for you soon!
Which, as you know, was written by Meat Loaf's frequent collaborator, Jim Steinman. One of my app stories had the hashtag #Steinman (it also featured G1 ponies), and another of my app stories was also named after a Steinman song (Holding Out For A Hero as made famous by Bonnie Tyler).
There's a lot of overlap in the things we like.
Woo! Having seen a good chunk of what's been cut out, I think everyone's going to love this. I'm interested to see how you integrate the various drafts into a cohesive whole.
I'm hoping that means more updates to Convention Hotel!
I sincerely hope no one was in that vehicle at the time.
Now i wish to go to titan since you could strap on wings and fly there
...thought wolves were my spirit animals
Turns out its pegasi!
This may be the most inaccurate thing I've ever seen you write. You're a PoE writer, and your one big HiE story is going on three years without an update.
Ah, sorry about your work difficulties.
Thanks for writing!
(Though did you mean to not link this blog post in the story?)
5758391
Thank you!
Yeah, one of the big things that was a problem for us was a Ford 6.7 with oil and coolant leaks. Especially since my manager wanted to take some shortcuts to save time and cost fixing it . . . I probably spent close to 40 hours on that dumb truck over the last three weeks.
Looking at the parking lot, it won't be until after the New Year at the very earliest. Sigh.
5758397
The man who wrote pretty much all the great 80s power ballads. Also I love one of Bonnie Tyler's songs, I think you can probably guess which one. Exit Eden did a banging cover of it, too.
I'm interested to see how I do it, too
I currently have an editing copy of it with sections labeled by number and sections labeled by letter and it'll be blended into one fabulous copy 
It might; there's one idea I've been holding on to for a while regarding elevators and how they're meant to operate versus how some ponies use them.
So do I. I'm guessing if the National Weather Service used it on their official page, it probably didn't have anyone in it, but I don't know for sure.
5758449
It's not wrong, either.
Some years ago, I was working at a factory when a tornado came through town. While everybody was crouching under tables in the break room, I was out on the front steps watching the clouds swirl and the shingles start to peel off the abandoned Michigan Bean Company elevator. They made me come inside, but honestly if we'd been hit, being inside and under a table wouldn't have helped; the presses were steam operated and if one line ruptured everyone'd get cooked.
The good news was that tornado didn't kill or injure anyone, and property damage was minimal . . . we kind of lucked out on it, to be honest.
5758569
Yeah, I dunno what I was thinking when I typed that. Goes to show I should spend more time proof-reading my blog posts, I guess.
5758880
It's the nature of the job I chose, sigh. At least it gives me enough money to buy ponies and inspiration to write a few mechanic-themed blog posts here and there, so that's something.
You're welcome!
Nope, just totally forgot to put the link in the story. I'll fix that now, thank you!
5759078
Neat
5758367
So the original idea was a human store in Equestria (I settled on Home Depot) and a resident human in Equestria seeing it and being curious. I figured they'd have the usual corporate branding, but instead of being a big box store as we know them, it'd be more rustic (half-timbered or stone, thatched roof, etc.). It was going to focus on some of the merchandise differences; for example, in the lumber section there would be a bin of 'sticks for building' next to a bin of 'sticks for eating.'
As I was turning over that idea in my mind, I was thinking of the customers who'd be there (who's buying the sticks for eating, for example?), uniforms and so on and sort of expanded my vision beyond ponies, which led to version 2 of the story where it focused more on the customers and employees of the store (i.e., how would ponies deal with working for a human company, does the floor manager have a Home Depot cutie mark, etc.); humans who lived in Equestria might adopt some of the more relaxed clothing rules in Equestria . . . that led me to imagine the checkout scene and who the narrator was in line with, and I somehow thought of there being a minotauress with all the ponies in the checkout line.
And of course you know where it went from there.
5759082
And thanks to site search, now I do too. To quote the meme, hello there!
5759080
Aye, glad it has those positives. :)
(Even if the mechanic blog posts are one of the things I'm behind on.)
:)
Ah, glad I mentioned it, then, and thanks!
I'm glad I was able to help edit this =)
¡Paradise has an hot plot!
I finished my copy of Book of All Stories a few days ago. This was in the top 5 for my favorite stories.
5760640
I'm glad you did! It's a very different story from when it started, that's for sure!
5760657
She does. And beguiling green eyes.
5761508
Huzzah! Glad you enjoyed it!