Ghost Mike's Ponyfic Review Monday Musings #58 · 5:00pm Apr 17th, 2023
Alright, I’m spent. It’s Sunday night as I’m writing this, I’m more knackered than Big Mac after the turkey call competition, and I have literally nothing to mention as a forward to this Ponyfic Review Monday Musings that’s springing to mind, except a pointless two-paragraph ramble on what I’ve been watching lately. I won’t blame you for skipping it.
There’s The Super Mario Bros. Movie, naturally, because surely everyone who’s planning to see it theatrically has by now. I’m a little kinder than the critics have been, but still found it on balance to offer little series references/in-jokes and recreations of gameplay mechanics/sequences. And not ones that really get much beyond the mechanics. Don’t regret having seen it, but I can’t see myself desiring to watch it again. Though the visuals are easily Illumination’s best, largely off the solid baseline from the games, even if they’re not being used creatively. Not in a world where DreamWorks and Sony are pushing the CG animation envelope.
On the other end, I had a pleasant surprise come from a friend’s recommendation of the 4-episode Netflix miniseries Oni: Thunder God’s Tale. One that flew under the radar even more than Kid Cosmic, this, it’s a stop-motion-emulation-via-CG hybrid (reportedly there’s some actual stop motion in there too, but I couldn’t spot it, though that might just speak to how good they got at making the two indistinguishable) blending Japanese myths and legends with a modern-but-not-anachronistic-angle into a quirky and sweet package. Even the routine coming-of-age and community-outsider threads of the main character in a village of folklore heroes feel dynamic enough as expressed through this angle (put it this way: I found it gains the freshness from the cultural shot that recent Disney Animation films are trying and failing at). Then there’s the mixture of varying textures for different characters, from felt to wood, and the specific colour palette choices and diffused lighting courtesy of Daisuke “Dice” Tsutsumi. Makes for a treat. Definitely for kids, both in repetitive dialogue that often goes a few extra lines on point already implied wonderfully and the easily-predictable plot. And it is a streaming series, with a 2h40m runtime across the 4 episodes that could easily be fitted into a single normal-length film (though I’d advise against bingeing it; I watched one episode a week myself). But it’s a nice treat, easily digested and enjoyed. An IMDb viewer rating of 8.2, even from only near-exactly 1,000 votes, isn’t nothing!
Oh, and I also got to the end of Star Wars: The Bad Batch Season 2, which definitely falls somewhat into the “comfort food of a franchise I like” territory. Like the first season, a bit meandering at times, but somewhat more focused and with a higher portion of striking/memorable episodes and moments, so it represents an incremental increase over that in character and plot, continuing to largely carry the strength of The Clone Wars into an early-Empire era; little I’d actively rewatch, but it reaffirms that for all the live action Star Wars series have largely gone the way of the bantha, the animation content, produced largely as it was pre-Disney, remains enjoyable – can’t wait for Visions Season 2 in May, and not just because of the Cartoon Saloon episode! 
Okay that should do. Back to Ponyfic. Pretty normal theme-less week this time, though one keeping to my personal goal of a healthy-ish word count, with one short one shot, three medium-length ones, and a novella. All leading up to some actual Ponyfic novels in here real soon, now I’m a decent ways into catching up on missed Author Spotlights for the end of 2022. No timeline promises, but likely right in the heat of Summer, that. In the meantime, have these five fics to pick at.
This Week’s Spectral Stories:
Truthfully by Ice Star
A Filly's Guide to Not Making Headlines by Bradel
The Origin Of A Species by MasterThief
Petriculture by Kwakerjak
Above All Else by 8686
Weekly Word Count: 46,154 Words
Truthfully by Ice Star
Genre: Romance/Sad (w/Death)
Rarity, Applejack, Big Mac, Other
4,300 Words
November 2017Listened to via Scribbler's reading
Rarity never thought much of Applejack, no sir. She was just another filly in school, one with a complete set of opposite attitudes and interests, and other than situations where their desires collided, like Applejack’s knack in maths and biology for homework, Rarity didn’t socialise with her. Yet now that something awful has happened to Applejack, given her and her brother’s days-long absence from school, Rarity decides to do what no one else will, and finds out what’s wrong. Not because she’s Applejack’s friend, for she isn’t. This is something apart from friendship.
This story basically combines two headcanons, one of which is a spoiler but involves the Death tag, and the other of which forms pretty much the whole story; Rarity not understanding that she has feelings for Applejack and being her prissy filly self about it. The potential of Pre-Rainboom stories for any of the Mane Six is present and accounted for her, with Rarity being just as snobbish as the elite she aspires to one day join, yet having that vulnerability and essence of who she’ll be one day that makes what amounts to her whining to herself for 4K endearing. Mostly.
The other aspect of note here is this playing into an unrequited crush one moves on from. Both from the lack of a sequel, the way this ends and the author’s own comments. It makes the ending land quite effectively.
What leaves this all a bit muddled is that, with the bulk of this being recollection on Rarity’s part as she journeys to Sweet Apple Acres, there is far too more perspective, timeline and narrative jumps that, on paper, should build up a stream-of-consciousness to give the fic its drive, but in practice as executed here, robs the otherwise immaculate pacing and makes you aware of how little happens. Not helped by the wires in these thoughts getting crossed, with Rarity not knowing some facts then later knowing them, for instance.
With another editing pass, this might have been a really solid showcase of not understanding one's own feelings and the pony one has those feelings for. It’s still that, but a bit muddled throughout, though a strong ending leaves one leaving the story on a relatively strong note.
Rating: Decent
A Filly's Guide to Not Making Headlines by Bradel
Genre: Comedy/Slice of Life
Twilight (w/Rarity, CMCs & Applejack)
8,218 Words
May-June 2013
This just in: The Equestria Daily reports that freshly crowned Princess Twilight Sparkle has made none too flattering remarks about Saddle Arabia and Northern Griffonstan. Yeah, just add it to the pile. That’s the state of Twilight’s life lately, every comment of hers twisted by the press to the worst possible takeaway. She just isn’t cut out for the scrutiny a royal falls under. Luckily, she has somepony who’s a master of presenting the right image in Rarity, and three trusty foals to practise with. Or… maybe that’s unlucky. No, the farmpony wanting in, that’s unlucky.
Comedy is often based around escalation, upping the ridiculousness of a situation or making more and more left-field turns as a story progresses. Interestingly, this story almost does the opposite: we’ve got an opening chapter where Twilight’s statements are twisted to be taken as declarations of war. Then we have roleplay with Rarity, Applejack and the CMC, which falls apart via character-based humour. Then the final chapter is played relatively straight, with the comedy being purely of the “aha, you are clever” witty variety as Twilight now has charge of things. This works surprisingly well: due to being built around a loose arc of Twilight’s even if much of the progress does take place offpage, it gives a throughline to this shift from the fic being a joke vehicle to a sincere takeaway. Other than the middle section being a bit lopsided pacing-wise (it’s fully half the fic) this structural gambit really pays off, making the fic quite satisfying.
Somewhat less satisfying is the characterisation; there isn’t a character that isn’t well voiced, but in the middle section especially, the supporting players tread into caricature territory somewhat. At least for Applejack, who is almost purely a schticky joke vehicle; Rarity but leaning better while the CMCs act as the foil to the adults that they always are with nearly no hiccups (if one can buy the flip-flops between them having adult-level insights that undermine the actual adults, which in this context, I can). As for the conclusion, while satisfying at seeing Twilight have charge of things, it doesn’t fully link to the tactics and advice building up to it in Twilight’s tutelage, somewhat softening the link between the comedy fest and the straight conclusion.
We’re left with a predictable piece but a very enjoyable one, even if some small oversights do keep it back from being all that memorable. But between the above, a treasure trove of ungulate-based puns and what I understand are characters and a tone borrowed from GhostOfHeraclitus’s Whom the Princesses Would Destroy, this homespun take on grappling with international diplomacy make for a solid episode-like piece.
Rating: Pretty Good
The Origin Of A Species by MasterThief
Genre: Adventure/Drama/Sad
OC
2,528 Words
October 2022
A kirin linguist has finally cracked how to translate an ancient stone tablet she’s been bashing her horn against for weeks. What she finds therein, an account of oral history otherwise lost on exactly how her kind came into the world, serves to paint everything in a new light.
Even the best finalists at Everfree Northwest’s Iron Author, a speedwriting contest to use several seemingly disparate prompts together, usually still show their origin’s weaknesses when they make their way to Fimfiction. Not this one. Oh, it is short and quickly-paced, so I suppose it does show its origin, but not in a way that matters. You’d never believe an exciting and touching adventure story could fit in 2,020 words (the length once omitting the bookends), and yet it does, with characters making an impression purely from their action, as will happen with strong historical accounts.
More than that, MasterThief nails both the voice of this tale and the tone/timeline span of it feeling like an account of a tale where some details were still lost to history, and thus there might be minor embellishment here and there. It has the feeling of a bedtime story or fairy tale, except one with a bit more violence (so, a Brothers Grimm tale), all while still fully carrying out this property’s mantra of love, one bourne through to the final bookend after the linguist is done.
Seriously, stop what you’re doing and go read this. It’s a real keeper, for the adventure aspects, how it’s recanted, the coolness of the ideas within, the brevity giving it energy that benefits it, and the lasting effect that the final result within leaves. Speedwriting contest fics rarely get better than this. Hearing this read live must have been an absolute treat.
Rating: Really Good
Petriculture by Kwakerjak
Genre: Slice of Life
Twilight, Pinkie
6,716 Words
March 2012Reread
Preparing for a visit from her parents for her birthday has Twilight in full-on panic mode, despite all the preparations being well in order. Thus, she easily defaults to Spike’s suggestion of researching something to keep her mind clear, settling on unsolved conundrums. Alas, most of them regard Pinkie Pie, a subject Twilight learnt about not trying to logically puzzle out the hard way. But there is something at the bottom that involves her, but isn’t about her: ‘What exactly is rock farming?’ Surely the rest of Pinkie’s family is normal, so this must be possible to solve.
Honestly, for a story jossed six ways to Sunday even before Pie family members started showing up in the show, this fandom classic has aged remarkably well. Helps that it likely felt fandom-only even at the time, while its final deduction explains a lot of random asides in the show’s early lore as regards Pinkie and Twilight, for folks who like to see that sort of headcanon. That’s honestly the main reason this story was in the top 50 rated stories for so long (even now, it’s still at 91st); it explores it’s interesting questions competently and ends with a very satisfying answer. Even returning to the story, and having forgotten nearly everything else about it and the three sequels I read bar the concept of a new character from them, I never forgot the end reveal. Simultaneously mind-warping and instantly believable, and that sticks.
This does rather handicap my ability to talk about the story (okay, it’s got 58K views, but I still gotta assume some folks reading this review haven’t read it), so what of the buildup across its first two-thirds? It’s fast-paced, jumping around several different scenes in its very low-key S1/2 manner of portraying the characters and Twilight being Twilight (with everypony assuming she’s doing another checkup on the preparations before she instead asks about Pinkie/rock farming, among other things). Frankly, it does show it being Kwakerjak’s debut fic, with both the prose construction and the actual incident often tying itself in loops that does take some energy out of the heavily interesting mystery itself. And some LUS, for those particularly vigilant of such things. It makes the bulk of it merely moderately pleasing, and while the last chunk justifies that, it’s not everything. Even that last part largely amounts to a talking head exposition dump, not the most creative way to go about it.
Honestly, though, nine times out of ten, fandom classics have a more severe ratio of amazing-concept-to-slack-competent-writing than this, which is another part of what I meant. It goes down easy, the ideas stick, the characters feel convincingly themselves, and it is only deflated somewhat by its delivery method. Easy to see why this garnered so much praise and traffic.
Rating: Pretty Good
Above All Else by 8686
Genre: Adventure
Applejack, Rainbow Dash
24,392 Words
December 2014-January 2015Reread
Applejack’s received her fair share of challenges from Rainbow Dash in their time to prove who’s the most awesome pony. When the latest one of the daring variety goes awry with, yet again, no clear winner, Dash challenges Applejack in a race to perilous mountain, winner take all. Despite his misgivings about Dash’s winning-is-everything attitude to the whole affair, Applejack accepts. Yet as they venture across perilous forests and rapids, with Dash nonchalant about every danger either of them face, Applejack finds herself increasingly frustrated and confused with her friend.
By and large, this is just 8686 writing with all their usual strengths in another story that feels episode-like even when it obviously couldn’t be (I speak in ways beyond the length and frequent use of thoughts where there’s no dialogue). Well-paced to the point that even though it is a solid 50% longer than it really needs to be and is quite fond of overly descriptive scene/emotion setting, it never drags; overflowing with nice touches that just feel right (Winona’s characterisation springs to mind, though a technically-unnecessary excerpt from a fictional Daring Do novel shines especially); making the scenes and introspection feel so lived in through a tasteful combination of telling us quite a bit but leaving the key things to be shown long before they’re told, it’s all here.
More than anything, it’s the relationship between Applejack and Dash that truly shines here. Both competitive ponies, it really shows why, despite finding her indifference frustrating, Applejack puts up with and vibes with Dash, off what separates her from the true egocentric ponies out there. Beyond just standard “she’ll always be there for you” loyalty platitudes. This does form the centrepiece of why Dash does some of the things she does as explained later, and indeed she is let off rather lightly for some of her behaviour throughout. Which could be a problem in a lesser work. Yet, this so fully captures how they vibe with each other, how Dash isn’t good at expressing thanks and other sincere emotion yet will find other ways to do it, and how Applejack gets that and her, and will meet Dash halfway and bring out a different, better side of her, that it doesn’t matter. Indeed, it’s so strong that their depiction here shows why so many people ship AppleDash, while also showing why their just-friendship of unspoken closeness and mutual agreement/understanding is so very special, and deserves more spotlighting over pulling the romance trigger with the pair.
I can’t in all rights call this one of 8686’s best. On top of the aforementioned flaws that don’t bug much but which are still present, it does basically gamble it all on this reading of the duo’s relationship, and while it sold me on that, and avoids typical treading water territory of them being competitive, the buildup to the end material does still get excessive for the first two-thirds. Even apart from overt descriptions for everything, there’s at least one too many troubling incidents on the adventure, and 8686’s low-key slice of life writing as merged with these adventure aspects shows the modular cracks after a few. All more noticeable in a story with virtually no other characters or subplots. But otherwise, a spiffing unique-yet-just-right depiction of Applejack and Rainbow Dash’s friendship and personalities, strong enough to work for nearly everyone who can make do with Dash being unapologetic in being herself.
Rating: Really Good
Spooky Summary of Scores:
Excellent: 0
Really Good: 2
Pretty Good: 2
Decent: 1
Passable: 0
Weak: 0
Bad: 0
Always up for reading a fic about the kirins! I will check out "The Origin Of A Species" for sure. :)
Oh, and that's a funny coincidence - I know the artist who made the cover art, we work together on EoJ!
I know, right?
Seeing as you're commenting on shows in your intro, have you seen Lackadaisy yet? I hadn't heard of it until everybody started praising it, but now I'm hoping they'll be able to make it into a proper series.
Glad you liked The Origin Of A Species as much as I did! I'm not a huge kirin fan, but I was still impressed in a similar way to you. I liked Petriculture slightly more (gave it four stars) but I read it a long time ago, which may or may not have a bearing. I see we're broadly in agreement on Bradel's story, too. I haven't read either of the others, though 8686's getting a Really Good despite a whole para of reservations is enough to add it to my RiL list. Not a bad week for you, really.
Wow! I have not heard a thing about Oni! Will definitely give it a go. (I adored Kid Cosmic, but it already had a leg up with me by being in the obscure micro-genre of Isolated Desert Diners Where Weird Things Happen that I love so much.)
Good selection of stories this time, including one of my favorites. May have to put 8686's on my list.
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To clarify, I didn't mean that I found it better than Kid Cosmic; I would say I prefer the latter for sure. Oni's still a bit too comfortably generic and familiar in its plotting and characterisation. I more meant that this 100% fell in "released on streaming with virtually no promotion, a handful of folks watched it, and then it was swallowed up by the bowels of the backlog with no fanfare". Kid Cosmic, while still disgustingly under-promoted, at least had the fan following of Craig McCracken to give it a leg up on social media and word-of-mouth. The following of a gifted animator for his approach to lighting and colours palettes, even one as fantastic as Dice Tsutsumi, can hardly hope to compete with the following engineered by the creator of Powerpuff Girls, Foster's and Wander Over Yonder, after all.
I dunno that I'd ever specifically added the Diner part to that equation of my specific media niches, but certainly as far as isolated desert towns where weird things happen, I was on board from the beginning, eeyup.
I'd almost be annoyed at that tease without saying which it is, if it wasn't laughably easy to figure out which you're referring to.
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It was a Pretty Good/Really Good edge case, and what tipped it slightly for me was just that outside of the end content, the fic was completely pleasantly unremarkable, the epitome of a Decent rating. So I had to debate with myself if the material of the ending (which, again, is delivered in a plain talking heads exposition dump) was so strong as to bump it up two ratings. And I felt, as much as I remembered it and it stuck with me and many other viewers, that it wasn't quite. Still, a very strong Pretty Good all the same!
This was also a Pretty Good/Really Good edge cases, one where even now, I'm not 100% sure I made the right call. Didn't help that it had been read by few enough people as to not be able to get a great bead on a consensus, sample size and all that. But the portrayal of Applejack, Rainbow Dash and their platonic relationship really was that unique and fabulous.
And honestly, I probably protracted that paragraph a bit.
Because even some of the things in there are closer to features than bugs, if you get me.
Honestly, when I was compiling the fics for this week it looked like it was going to be a middling average of ratings. I'm as surprised as you are it turned out this well!
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Yep! All o' that.
For films in the IDDWWTH genre, Bagdad Cafe immediately springs to mind. If you like weird, it's got plenty of that! One of the Howling films fits the bill, but it stinks. Can't bring other titles to mind right now, but there are more of them than you might think. Probably because there are a lot of Mojave ghost towns that are Hollywood-adjacent where indy productions can film for cheap.
I haven't read Petriculture in aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaages but I remember it being one of the early fics where the twist really blew my mind :) I definitely celebrated it back in the day. It's got sequels too!
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It blew my mind too when I read it a few years ago, long after most folks had. So it still works, absolutely.
Oh, I'm aware. I even read three of the four (I lost interest by the novel-length Discord one), though being from my pre-rating days, I remember little beyond the new OC. Still, given how well this one fared, and the short enough length of those three (29K, 5K and 14K respectively), I can actually see myself rereading and reviewing them too. About time I got a series of several fics on here to get through an instalment every few months! Only one so far has been Lets Do This' G5-with-the-early-Mane-6-concepts AU, and as I did the first two together for that and it's only three entries in thus far, it doesn't feel that way.
dang, you read some good stuff all at once! :D
Thanks for the review!