Twist & Shout
Diamond Tiara had barely made it in on time, and she had gotten some odd looks on the looks on the way, with her new mane style and missing tiara. She did her best to pretend that Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle had just happened to enter at the same time as her, and they all went to their normal seats. Silver Spoon glanced at her from her seat, then immediately looked away.
That wasn't really any surprise after what had happened last night, but it still really really hurt to have her best friend pretending she wasn't there. Today certainly wasn't going to be easy for her. The more the room filled, the more everypony seemed to be focussing on Apple Bloom's empty desk, consciously or not. After a moment, she suddenly realized that she was staring at it herself, and turned to the front of the classroom.
Once everypony had taken a seat, Cheerilee got up from behind her desk and walked to the front of the classroom. She cleared her throat, and the noise of the classroom faded into silence.
"Good morning, class! Before we get started today, some of you may have noticed that Apple Bloom is not here today. Yesterday, she was hospitalized with both her hind legs broken after school." Diamond Tiara swore Cheerilee was looking right at her as she said that. "Barring complications, she should be out in a few days. I thought I'd pass a get well card around the classroom everypony could sign to cheer her up."
Cheerilee set the card on Twist's desk. Twist scribbled a message on it, drew a little picture of a peppermint stick by it, and passed it over to Silver Spoon. The class started talking again as the card was passed from desk to desk. Most of it was about Apple Bloom, making Diamond feel awkward. Worse, it had to be passed around Apple Bloom's empty desk, and when it was, it managed never to make it to her, either.
Snails finished signing the card, and held it up for Miss Cheerilee to pick up. Seeing this, Diamond raised one foreleg high in the air to catch her attention.
"Yes, Diamond Tiara?" Cheerilee asked.
"Miss Cheerilee, I haven't had a chance to sign the card yet!" she protested.
"Of course," she said, bringing it over. "I wouldn't want to forget you."
As Cheerilee set the card down on her desk, Diamond thought about what she should write.
Alright, how should I sign this? I really need to make this up to Apple Bloom somehow. She's the one I really need to apologise to the most, if I'm ever going to have a chance to make things up with daddy.
After a moments thought, she decided simple was best. In the one free spot, she crammed in "I'm sorry. Get better soon.", signed it, and pass the card back. Glancing at it, Miss Cheerilee nodded, and took the card back to her desk with her.
No longer occupied with the card, she noticed that Twist and Silver Spoon were talking enthusiastically, as if they'd been friends for a long time. Something inside Diamond Tiara burned. Had she really been replaced that easily?
Miss Cheerilee quieted the class down once more.
"Thank you, class. I'll be taking this card with me when I visit Apple Bloom tonight, and I'm sure she'll be very happy to see all your well wishes." She walked over to her desk. "Now, if you can all take your history books out and turn to page 216, let's begin our lesson."
Her history book. Oh Celestia, did she even have her schoolbooks?
Diamond Tiara started searching futilely through her bag for what was the second time this morning. She was pretty sure it wasn't gonna turn up, too. After all, it would have shown up when she was looking for her comb earlier. She'd probably just left it in her room last night, in which case, it might as well be lost forever.
"Diamond Tiara?" Miss Cheerilee called out. "Do you have your book?"
"I'm s- sorry, Miss Cheerilee," she stammered out, flustered. "It must not have been in my bag."
Miss Cheerilee sighed. "Would somepony be willing to share their textbook with Miss Tiara for the rest of the class?"
Embarrassingly, there was total silence for several moments, as absolutely nopony raised their hooves, not even Silver Spoon. Finally, a lone hoof popped up in the air near the back of the class. Miss Cheerilee glanced in that direction.
"Thank you, Sweetie Belle," she said. "Diamond Tiara, can you move seats next to her, and share the book? Once you are settled in place, I'd like you to start reading to the class at the beginning of the chapter."
Diamond Tiara slowly got up, put her saddlebags on, and hiked to the back. She pushed an empty desk next to Sweetie Belle, who immediately moved her history book between them. Once Diamond had sat down, she looked at the book and began reading in a bored monotone.
“Before Equestria was founded, ponies were separated into three tribes…”
Fortunately, she only had to do this for one page of the book, then Cheerilee switched readers. She continued doing this, switching who was reading every so often. Very few of them managed to make anything they were reading sound at all interesting.
The lesson dragged on and on. This was so boring! Usually when things got this boring would be about the time she started passing notes to Silvy. Silvy wasn't anywhere near her, though. She could try with Sweetie Belle, but she honestly didn't think she'd reply.
Pushing her mane back in frustration, and wincing as she remembered her tiara wasn't there, her only solace was that Silver Spoon was in the same exact spot as her. She glanced in that direction to confirm that, and was surprised to see a note in her hoof.
Well, maybe she was going to try to pass it to her, half the room away or not? She waited a minute, and Silver Spoon passed it alright. She passed it over to Twist, who opened it up, read it, and started scribbling out a reply.
Was it that easy to replace her? She'd known Twist and Silver Spoon had hung out before, back when she'd been busy running the paper, but that was different. The two of them had always passed notes to each other, walked to and from class together, and hung out together. They were best friends.
Now, suddenly, she felt like she'd been replaced. She pictured Twist as Silvy's new best friend. Images of the two of them going to the movies together, gossipping about the other ponies, and having fun together ran through her head. She pictured the two of them laughing and doing her and Silvy's private "Bump Bump Sugar Lump Rump" greeting, and fumed.
Lost in her own private thoughts, in took seeing Sweetie Belle get up next to her for her to notice that half the class had already gone outside.
Right, it must be lunchtime.
Pulling herself out of her seat, she stumbled and nearly fell. Diamond automatically felt for her tiara to catch it. Not feeling it there did absolutely nothing to improve her mood.
Looking down, she discovered that one strap of her saddlebags had wrapped itself around one of her legs. She pulled her trapped leg carefully out of the straps, and put them back on.
She slowly walked outside, not really looking forward to lunch, given that all she had was the muffin she'd been given earlier in the day. Everypony seemed to be reading the Foal Free Press, but she ignored them, since she didn't really want to talk right now, anyway. Picking out a table no one else was sitting at, she took her saddlebags back off.
Searching through them, she pulled out a paper bag and put it on the table in front of her. Opening it, she found the muffin inside crumbling to pieces. It must have gotten smashed some time earlier in the day.
On a normal day, this would be nothing more than a snack for her. With it crumbled into pieces like that, she might have even tossed it. But this muffin was all she had, and she wasn't even sure what she was going be able to bring tomorrow.
She reluctantly started eating one of the pieces of the muffin, thinking of the rice pilaf and waldorf salad she would have had normally today. As she did so, she heard a thud behind her. She craned her head around, and saw Twist laying on the ground next to her saddlebags.
"Oops!" Twist said, seeming far too cheerful. "Thorry!"
She dusted off Diamond's saddlebags, picked herself up, and trotted off, totally oblivious to Diamond's irritation turning into full-blown anger behind her.
How dare she just crash into my stuff like that after stealing my best friend and act like nothing's wrong! I'm going to give her a piece of my mind!
Getting up, Diamond charged over there in a fury, shoving aside anypony unfortunate enough to be in her way. A few copies of the student paper went flying, and even more eyes seemed to be on her.
"What do you think you're doing, crashing into my bags like that?" she screeched in a fury. "You could have broken something?"
Twist seemed entirely taken aback by this and just stood there, looking blank. Silvy stepped in to defend her.
"Don't you think you're being a little-"
"And you! One day!" Diamond yelled at top volume. "One day and you've already replaced me!"
"It's not like that!" Silver Spoon replied.
"Isn't it?" she replied. "You've spent the whole day ignoring me and passing notes with Twist. And now you're spending lunch with her after she nearly tramples over my bags!"
Diamond's eyes were starting to tear up, even if some part of her said she was being unreasonable. Twist seemed to have lost a bit of her normal happy detachment from everything and actually seemed upset now.
"I thaid I was th-thorry!" she protested. Then a copy of the Foal Free Press lying on the ground caught Twist's eye. She picked it up and started reading the front page intently, ignoring Diamond.
Twist not paying attention to her only served to make Diamond Tiara more upset. What could possibly be more important than her right now?
"Maybe if you actually looked where you were going occasionally, instead of traipsing around with your eyes closed and that stupid smile on your face all the time-"
Eyes tearing up, Twist looked up from the paper. "D-Diamond? I t-think you have o-other pro-problems right now."
Twist held the paper out to her, turned to the front page. She went to brush it aside, but then the picture on the front cover registered with her. Her annoyance at Twist and Silvy faded, and she got a sick feeling at the bottom of her stomach.
On the front page was a big picture of Apple Bloom laying under her wagon, leg clearly broken. The headline read "DIAMOND TIARA CRIPPLES APPLE BLOOM - HAS SHE GONE TOO FAR?".
She remembered how many ponies around her were reading that paper and she went pale. Looking around, she was receiving even more glares, and a few foals seemed to be heading in her direction.
Not even paying attention to the fight she'd started a minute ago, she stammered out. "I-I'm sorry! I'd b-better go.."
Fear in her eyes, she blindly stumbled back to her bags, only to be cut off by Snip and Snails blocking her way. Normally she wouldn't have too much trouble with those two morons, but they actually looked upset, and with a few others starting to come over, she might actually be in trouble.
"Hey! Where do you think you're going?" Snips said.
"Yeah. Where are you going?"
Approaching from one side, a blue earth pony chimed in. "We heard about what you did to Apple Bloom."
She thought her name was Archer, but couldn't really remember. She'd never talked to her other than in passing. Looking away, she suddenly noticed Rumble was approaching from her other side, and was really starting to get worried.
"Where do you get off yelling at Twist like that? What she'd ever do to you?" he exclaimed, and the others sort of glanced at him for a moment, then looked away.
"You see, we like Apple Bloom," Snails continued. "We thought you should know how she feels right now."
"Yeah. What he said."
As all four of them approached, she panicked. She couldn't have a broken leg right now! Nopony'd help her out if she got hurt. This was bad.
"Miss Cheerilee?!" she called out, getting pretty freaked out. There wasn't any response.
What was with this? Why wasn't Miss Cheerilee ever there when she was needed?
She took a deep breath. Ok, think, Diamond. Daddy always talked about knowing ponies weaknesses and taking advantage of them. Can I do that here? What are their weaknesses?
Well, Snips and Snails were dumb, she supposed, but how could she take advantage of that? Then she noticed something. The two of them actually were leaving a lot more room between them then they should be as they approached.
Not even stopping to think, she darted forward as fast as her pudgy legs would let her, rather than backwards like they were expecting, pushing right between them. Startled, they didn't manage to block her and got shoved aside. It took a moment for them to grasp what had happened and turn around.
While they were doing that, she grabbed her bags and fled the schoolyard, adrenaline making her go the fastest she thought she ever had run. She ran and ran and kept on running, paying absolutely no attention to where she was going.
After a while, she tripped over a tree branch, and fell to the ground. Exhausted, she lay there for a moment, just hoping it would be over quickly. When nothing happened, she slowly picked herself up, and looked around.
All her pursuers were gone. Maybe they'd been gone for a while, even, since she hadn't been looking. She walked over to where her bags lay from her fall, and winced as one hoof touched the ground.
Examining it, she picked out a stone that had managed to get stuck in it. It had left a bit of a bruise behind, though. Well, she'd have to live with it for now. She limped over and put her bags back on.
Looking around, she she had gotten a lot further from the school then she thought. And, it suddenly occurred to her, from her lunch.
Well, there was no way she was going back now. Even if Miss Cheerilee didn't get on her about leaving school grounds before school was over, she couldn't go back. They'd gang up on her again, and she'd be hurt worse next time.
And now everypony knew what she'd done. Worse, the paper had acted like she wanted Apple Bloom hurt or something! How could they do that? How could they do that to her? It wasn't fair!
She wanted her daddy. She wanted her daddy so bad to come and make it all better, and make all her problems go away. It hurt that he wasn't there for her, and it hurt even more that some of her problems were his fault.
Diamond Tiara trudged along the road, hoof hurting, and a stitch in her side from running so hard. She wasn't really sure where she was going, but eventually found herself at the edge of Sweet Apple Acres.
She abruptly turned, and started making her way towards the clubhouse. She'd be in big trouble if any of the Apples caught her, but once she got to the treehouse, that was probably the best place for her right now, oddly.
She cautiously made her way through the orchard, quite aware how much her pink coat made her stand out. A few times, she thought she heard something, and hid behind a tree, but nopony turned out to be there.
Eventually she made it to the clubhouse and limped slowly up the ramp. Unsurprisingly, nopony was there. Well, school was still going on without her, she supposed. She doubted anypony really missed her.
Well, Miss Cheerilee might. At least, enough for her to be in trouble if she went back tomorrow, especially since she still wouldn't have her schoolbooks. She might even want to talk to her parents again, which couldn't happen.
Why had she been stupid enough to go off on Twist and Silvy like that, anyways? Sure, Twist shouldn't have crashed into her bag like that, but it wasn't really her fault if she was clumsy. Diamond supposed she couldn't really expect Silvy to go on with no friends, either, even if she had to.
But here she was. Living in a cobbled together treehouse that wasn't even hers. And nopony liked her. Perhaps nopony had ever liked her, and she'd just never quite figured that out before. Morosely, she tossed her bags in a corner, making a crunching sound when they hit.
Wait, had she just broken something?
She limped over to her bag and started rooting through it for what must be the third time today, trying to figure out what had broken. Everything looked about how she'd left it. Then she noticed the edge of a plastic bag under everything.
Pulling the bag out, it turned out to be full of more than a dozen peppermint sticks, and since they were broken in half, she was pretty sure they were what had broken. At least it wasn't anything major. But where had they come from?
Suddenly something clicked in her mind. She hadn't actually seen Twist fall, she'd just heard it, and saw Twist dusting off her bags afterwards. What if she hadn't actually fallen, but had actually just pretended to, and stashed these in there?
They were Twist's signature peppermint sticks, too, of that there wasn't any doubt. Why would she have done that, though? It wasn't like they were friends or anything. Her only real friend had been Silvy-
Silvy. Silvy, who Twist had just spent all morning talking to, and passing notes with. Oh Celestia, she was dumb. How could she have been so stupid?
It was obvious to her now. Because they were friends, Silver Spoon and Twist had been talking about her all morning. Twist, after finding out how bad things were for her, must have wanted to cheer her up, and stuck those peppermint sticks in her bag as a surprise for her.
And all she gotten for her trouble was yelled at. Twist probably wasn't thinking very good thoughts about her now, and neither was Silvy. She doubted they'd try to help her out again.
With the article in the school paper, everypony else was bound to be against her, too. So she didn't have friends. She couldn't go to school. She didn't even have lunch. Why couldn't she have anything? Why couldn't something go right?
She dissolved into full fledged nonstop crying and this time there was nopony there to comfort her. She cried, and called out for her daddy despite some part of her mind knowing he wasn't going to be there. She wasn't even sure how long she cried for.
Hours later, when somepony pulled a blanket around her, she didn't wake up.
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ten outa teeen
Darn, DT. You fool! Hopefully things will turn around at some top.
I had planned on holding off on this one until it was complete. Damn your clever self promotion!
You're a bold one, using my fondness for Twist against me...
Shake it up, baby, now
Shake it up, baby
Twist and shout
Twist and shout
3200497
I couldn't resist. I actually referenced Twist and Ponyville Confidential in here briefly, after all. Things don't go well for Twist in this chapter, but things don't go well for anypony, and Twist obviously had her heart in the right place.
Looking forward to the next chapter. Want to know who pulled that blanket over DT and why she didn't wake up.
Worded such a way you don't know if it's a kind act or she's been ambushed.
Of these sorts of stories, I can say you're doing a rather interesting take on it. Twist was a real treat in how she spoke and acted. Silvy I'm not 100% there, she's just being a good daughter and trying to see what happens I guess, but still seems to want to help Diamond out in some way possibly.
So many ponies are out for blood here. Loves the Scoots and DT moment with the breaking into sobs and Scoots totally calling out how unfair that is when she was so looking forward to fighting with Diamond it seems. Great job so far.
3200761
Yeah, I liked the horn moment, though I debated whether it was in character. I eventually decided it was, but in extremes you wouldn't normally see...
And Pinkie likes Apple Bloom. They burnt cupcakes together.
Don't let them bully you, Diamond! Send them to the hospital with all their legs broken!
Dammit, Arcum! Bullying was the only thing she was good at, and now she doesn't even have that!
3200779
Yeah, Twist was fun to write, and for as little screen time as she got, I think her character was well established. I even have a semi-canon reason to think Twist and Silvy might know each other.
Silvy pretty conflicted between her parents and her best friend at the moment. but then, internal conflicts seems to work itself in this story a lot.
And, yes, that Diamond / Scootaloo moment was one of my favorite ones in the story. It made it through several rough drafts.
Everyone certainly is after her blood, though, with a few notable exceptions. And Apple Bloom's not even out of the hospital yet.
Thanks, in any case. It'll be interesting to see how everything else I've got planned works out.
3200901
Well, two on one, or even two on three, she can manage. One on four, with possible reinforcements is a problem. And if Miss Cheerilee had actually heard her, or seen what was going on, she might have made it out alright.
Also, there's a big difference between bullying and actually being good in a fight. DT strikes me as more the type who is all talk.
Now if Babs had been there, things would have been interesting. Though that probably would have gone badly for DT, too.
3200992 IDK. Tossing three fillies UP a WHOLE flight of stairs, and getting face to face ready to throw down with Babs, even after seeing what Babs is like, I tend to think she's very well toned despite her prissy demeanor. Like a tiny Lina Inverse. Only without the overly destructive nature of tossing out Dragon Slaves like they were going out of style. xD
But yeah, brute force and talent are two different things. And the many Diamond Tiara's out there is what's nice to read about in stories, to see how others view her. Like I've mentioned else where, she's always either weak or heavily exaggerated. I think this Diamond is a fair representation of the weaker less physical DT.
3200992
Obviously, I was joking. Though, Diamond Tiara having to run away from school to avoid being targeted by the other kids does kinda underline how far she's fallen, no?
3201081
I could see that point of view. For my purposes, having her actually have a layer of fat to fall back on when she isn't exactly getting a good diet and is having to do a bunch of running helps things out. She probably will be toned by the time this story is over, simply from eating less and exercising...
3201171
It certainly does. That's going to be a problem for her. Of course, I already have something in mind...
3201204
As I see it, she needs to make some allies, fast. She can't get anywhere without anyone watching her back.
If I were her I'd start by patching things up with Silver and Twist as soon as possible, get Cheerilee to rein in the other kids a bit, beg Apple Bloom for forgiveness, cement the peace treaty with the CMC, and possibly seduce Scootaloo.
Oh yeah. Best plan ever.
3201289
You'd seduce Scootaloo after having Sweetie Belle's horn at your throat?
The rest of that sounds like good plans that someone who wasn't in the middle of mood swings, severe depression, and wanting the whole world to go away might do...
Eee! It lives. It must have been conjured by speaking its dread name in that topic about the best underappreciated fics.
I love that DT is coming around rather... slowly. The jealousy about Silver Spoon and Twist. The inability to put down anything meaningful on the card. Trying to pretend like she came in separately from the CMC. Much love. I know the temptation is to show huge gains. But this way is so much better.
As a totally random note, I had a huge moment of nostalgia when DT was reading from that history book. I used to love reading for the class.
Back to DT Redemption; the Twist thing was actually pretty clever. You keep bombarding Diamond Tiara with examples of ponies being good, while she distrusts them. It's honestly hard to think of a better way for a rather wretched character like Tiara to be shown the better path. The very best part of this fic is that I'm totally buying into the slow conversion. There's no eye-rolling. No sudden reversals. Just life providing lessons on how to be a better person, and Tiara being in a situation where she's forced to appreciate what that means.
I'm sorry to hear that you're having troubles writing. I do hope you figure a way around it, because I know I'd love to see more of this story. It's hitting all the right notes on a redemption fic, and that's very rare.
If you ever need someone to look over some works in progress, or to suggest things if you decide to revise, do feel free to poke at me. I do a lot of pre-reading around here. And I'm always happy to work with authors who have earned my respect.
Oh, and just quibbling little corrections that I randomly stumbled across:
I imagine that should be 'moments'. Nobody is going to sit there and wait for awkward minutes. And you need a space between 'class.' and 'Miss'.
3200901
You totally underestimate her skills at being a stuck-up, imperious bitch. It's her special talent!
And so long as her muzzle-raising muscles don't give out, she totally still has that.
3202857
You know, I'd missed that. Thanks!
I knew I needed to have her do at least one reversion to form, and I think this one worked out well. And there's a lot going on in her head, too. At least part of her anger that went into her confrontation was really anger at her father, and everything going on with her right now.
Admittedly, I'm not much good at writing anything meaningful on cards, either.
Funny thing is I think I actually knew she didn't grab her schoolbooks around chapter 2 or 3. Reading the chapter out loud is one of these traditional school activities that felt fairly appropriate. I kept the textbook excerpt short because I didn't really want to write too much of Equestria's history...
And yes, she's getting shown all these better examples while acting like she has been clearly is getting her nowhere. Once she actually has a chance to think about it, I may even be in a position to have her act nicer. Of course, act is the key word.
This chapters actually one I've had planned out mentally for a while. I'd actually kind of been wanting to get to it, then I started getting stalled out on the fight scene with Silvy and Twist. Most of it was me not finding time to write for a while. I had to write some misc. unrelated things to get back into the swing of it.
The fact that I'm trying to write two ongoing fics at the same time doesn't help. I'm still only halfway done on the next chapter of Just Winging It, though it should have gotten an update before Cubic Zirconia, and it's probably going to be a weak chapter anyways. I want the scene with sigil magic to be relatively realistic, so it's one of these ones where I really need to write it while referencing some books on magic.
And I'll keep that in mind. I actually offered up an earlier version of this chapter a few days ago in a blog post, but no one went in and commented, unfortunately. I was able to go and fix up most of the problem spots from that version anyways. I also have a horrible blind spot with apostrophes for pluralization...
More! I wanna see who the mystery pony is who puts the blanket over
Oof, kinda late reading his chapter. I seem to be falling behind in everything I read again, and this managed to slip far enough down my tracking list that I didn't even see it there.
Anyway, I'd say "What a twist" about the candy canes, but my first thought When DT saw Twist near her saddlebags was actually to wonder if maybe she stashed something in there. So instead, I'll say "What a Twist." She does seem like a pretty kind filly, even if she's mildly annoying in a superficial sort of way.
Diamond actually has more ponies willing to help her out than she realizes. There's Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, of course, and then her family butler guy and Pinkie Pie, plus even after that little situation during lunch, Twist and Silver Spoon probably won't just write her off, especially if Twist got Diamond's full story. And then there's always Fluttershy. I doubt she'd turn away anyone in need, even if she was very angry at them.
Pretty much any of them could have been the mystery pony with the blanket, really, especially since that was hours after she ran away from school. Scootaloo or Sweetie are probably the most likely, simply because of where Diamond is, but it's possible someone saw her running through town, or that Pinkie might've come to check up on her. One of the Apples? Seems unlikely, but can't rule it out.
So hmm, I wonder what those foals at lunch were actually going to do to her. Breaking her leg seems reeeally unlikely to be anything more than a threat, but beating her up a little is definitely possible.
And now what will Diamond do next? If she's starting to feel really desperate, and like she can't even hardly go into Ponyville at all anymore, maybe she'll actually try to find greener pastures somewhere else. That's a scary move, though, so she wouldn't consider that strongly until she's really run out of options.
3227018
Oh, I've been there. 349 unread updates. Not to mention my lack of Just Winging It updates.
I did kind of figure that some people would pick up on the peppermint thing early. It was a nice gesture on Twist's part, even if it backfired spectacularly on her. The potential Silver Spoon x Twist friendship is semi-canon, btw.
imageshack.us/a/img28/4888/sstwist3.png
I have actually been careful to make sure Diamond Tiara has a support structure of sorts waiting. Being panicked about what happened and catapulted straight into severe depression, she's a lot more sceptical about SS & T than she should be. And that support structure will grow a little, too.
That is a fair assessment of who could have been the one with the blanket. Of course, maybe it's Filthy Rich, come to take her back in! (And then the next chapter could cover his funeral, after his tragic death due to being shoved out the clubhouse window...)
As far as the foals, keep in mind that individual intents change once you actually have a crowd forming. Snips, Snails, and Archer may have just intended to scare her and maybe rough her up a little, and Rumble may have just come over because of Twist being shouted at[1], but once you have a herd, things can get ugly.
And just where was Cheerilee? And what happened after Diamond left? (Ok, i know the answers to both of those questions, but I cheat.)
What will Diamond do next? Well, that is a fair question. The answer, naturally, is the next chapter, though. I will say that at the moment, she isn't looking at the big picture, and is pretty lost in depression.
Irritating thing is I'm feeling a lot more motivated to write the next chapter of this then the overdue next chapter of Just Winging it. Of course, I actually wrote something like 2k of a story called "Magical Filly Apple B" in the last few days, but that's how things go sometimes.
--arcum42
[1] Though no one seems to have actually commented about that. Oh well.
3253737
Hmm... I'm not totally sure what you mean by the story not having a premise, really. At the very least, it has "Diamond Tiara's life gets shattered, and she has to pick up the pieces".
It isn't particularly action-acted, of course. To a certain extent, I'm still assembling my cast, really. And a lot of what I'm focusing on, really, is what's going on in Diamond's head.
And, yes, she is too young to be treated like an adult, and you can tell by the way she thinks occasionally that she really isn't prepared for any of this.
If this was Earth, I believe Filthy Rich could be charged with neglect and abandonment, and if anything happened to her, could be charged with murder. You can be assured that if Diamond had the sense to go to someone and tell them what happened, he would be in a lot of trouble.
Pity she wouldn't do anything that sensible.
--arcum42
3242113
Glad you're liking it, and I hope you enjoy where this ultimately ends up heading...
--arcum42
shows diamond tiara right
got pissed off by...her...in ten (micro)seconds flat.its fricking new academy record
DEATHPRIZE RAGE!!!!!!!
Hmm
*His carapace fades to a dark blue,
and his eyes dim from a light teal to a dark azure color*
Can a have some more chapters please?
*No muffins were thrown this day*
3402142
Well, if you look on the main page, you'll see that a story named "Just Winging It" just updated. That hadn't been updated in months, and getting a new chapter out for that was my top priority. Now that it's out, I can look at Cubic Zirconia.
As it happens, the first draft of the next chapter is done (and I'm partway into the chapter after that, in fact.). I need to do a second draft and some rewriting, though.
--arcum42
3402152
Yay
*His eyes light up and his shell turns pitch black*
Muffin party!
*Starts tossing muffins everywhere*
I admit, I didn't see the twist coming. Okay, that's a bad pun. As much as I sympathise for Apple Bloom, I can't say I think Diamond deserves to be in the rough like that. Dangit, more bad puns.
As late as I am to arrive to this, it's still interesting. There's a lot going on, there's no clear right or wrong, and it can go any way. So take your time on future chapters, I'm just going to go on to the next one.
Aaaaarrrggggg, that twist of Twist. This is a relentless fic (and that means I like it
)
Might want to change these italics to the first person, since when I first read that I thought it was referring to Twist, and it was rather jarring. Good chapter though.
*solemnly* Foals of Ponyville, I am disappointed in you. All of you.
You may not be able to see how Diamond Tiara's hurting, and if I was in your positions, I would feel just as angered at what she's done.
But while Tiara's actions may have been thoughtless, that does not excuse your actions towards her. She may be a bully, but she's still a flesh-and-blood equine being. And you're willfully hurting her?
*scowls* It doesn't matter what she's done--you're becoming no better than she is, or was.
It's been a while since I had to break out apathy mode to have to deal with this level of cringe.