"Come on Twilight, you can do it." Spike said. Twilight's horn began to glow, casting its usual light purple glow. Twilight carefully aimed her horn at Spike and fired a beam of magic at it. And then poof, a mustache appeared on Spike's face.
"Ha ha, ya did it!" Spike shouted out as he observed his mustache. "That's the fifthteenth new spell you've mastered this week. Your magic just keeps getting better and better."
"Oh Spike, it's nothing really, I'm sure any unicorn could've pulled off that spell." Twilight said. She really didn't like boasting about how good she was at magic, it made her feel uncomfortable.
"Well maybe, but how many unicorns could pull off not only that spell but several other spells, and not break a sweat?" Spike said "I only know one, and I'm sure everypony else does too."
"I'm not so sure about that Spike." Twilight said "I don't really go out of my way to show everyone what I can do."
"Geez Twilight, you don't have to be so humble." Spike said "Besides, just wait until Rarity sees me now." He began to fantasize about the majestic unicorn. "Oh hey Rarity, good to see you too. What's that? Oh this is nothing, it's just my awesome mustache. Why yes, I do take great pride in it. I agree, it really does make me look handsome." Spike said to himself. His fantasizing didn't last long however as Twilight used her magic to remove the mustache.
"Easy there Romeo. Don't get ahead of yourself." Twilight said "This spell doesn't last very long, and Rarity isn't going to fawn over you just because have a mustache. It's what on the inside that counts."
"So you know?" Spike asked.
"What makes you think I don't?" Twilight asked "Every time Rarity comes over I notice that you can't help but stare at her."
"It's that obvious huh?" Spike asked.
"Uh huh." Twilight said "Wouldn't surprise me if the whole town knew."
"Oh well, so much for keeping it a secret." Spike said. And then his stomach rumbled.
"Sounds like it's time for lunch." Twilight said. Spike and her made their way outside only to find that the whole appeared to be deserted. "Where is everypony?" Twilight asked.
"I've never seen Ponyville so empty before." Twilight said as she looked around.
"Me either." Spike said "This town is always so full of life, on any given day there are dozens of ponies out and about. Something must be up."
"Coming through!" shouted a male voice. Spike turned to look and suddenly found himself being carried by a small unicorn colt. "Snips, Snails!" Spike shouted.
Snips and Snails were two school aged unicorn colts. They weren't the smartest students, but they weren't dumb either. They had a reputation for getting into trouble however. They always meant well, but it seemed like every time you turned your back on them they'd end up in another pickle.
"What's going on? What's the rush?" Spike asked after Snips put him down.
"Oh have you not heard?" Snips asked "It was my understanding that everyone had heard."
"Heard what?" Spike asked.
"The most amazing thing ever that's what." Snips said.
"Uh still not getting it." Spike said.
"Hey Snips, I have an idea." Snails said "Why don't we just show him?"
"That's a great idea Snails." Snips said "We were on our way there anyway."
"What are you talking about?" Spike asked.
"Follow us and you'll find out." Snips said. Spike and Twilight followed the two colts to the center of town. Standing before them was a gaint cart with a stage. Everypony was wondering where it had come from, the mayor included.
"You brought us all the way out here to see this?" Spike asked.
"Welcome citizens of Ponyville! Consider yourselves lucky, for today you shall witness some of the most spectacular acts of magic ever performed!" a voice called out. Everypony looked around to try and figure out where the voice was coming from."You must all be wondering, who has decided to grace your humble town?" the voice said "It is none other than The Grrrrrrrrrreat and Powerful Trrrrrrrrixie!" A cloud of smoke appeared onstage. When it had vanished, there standing before the crowd was a light blue unicorn, decked out in a light purple hat and cloak, with stars and moons stiched all over it. Her mane was an even lighter blue than her coat but, her cutie mark was obscured by her cloak, although that didn't mean she didn't have one.
A few ponies, namly younger ones like Snips and Snails were impressed by what little they had seen. Most of the other ponies didn't think much of her. Trixie quickly set to work trying to win them over.
"Trixie is the mightiest illusionist, and perhaps the most powerful unicorn you'll ever meet!" Trixie boasted. As a traveling showmare she had gotten use to ponies dismissing her, and she knew just how to change their minds. "The Great and Powerful Trixie would like to tell you a little story. It's a story of Trixie got her cutie mark and became who she is now." as she was talking Trixie conjured up a spell to make some of the fireworks from her wagon display little images "It all began when the city of Hoofington came under attack. But not from any ordinary creature, no. The city was attacked by an Ursa Major. Most ponies would be terrified, but the Great and Powerful Trixe knew no such fear as she boldly took on the Ursa Major alone, and with one powerful blast of magic from her wand the Ursa Major was vanquished."
Several ponies in the crowd were amazed, Snips and Snails among them and Trixie basked in their applause. But several other ponies weren't convinced and started shouting things like "That story was a piece of manure!" or "That was the biggest load of horse apples I've ever heard!"
Trixie was not surprised to see that so many ponies didn't believe that story. "The Great and Powerful Trixie shall let you draw your own conclusions, but she hopes that at the least she has captured your attention." she said "The real show starts now!"
Twilight and Spike made their way over to join their friends, who, not surprisingly, were already talking about Trixie.
"I say she's nothing but a stuck up little filly who loves to hear herself talk!" Rainbow Dash said "And she thinks she's better than everypony else!"
"Sounds like someone we know, eh Rainbow Dash?" Applejack said, the look on her face showed she was not amuzed.
"What are you talking about?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I'm talking about you sugarcube." Applejack said "Don't act like you're better than she is when you go around tootin your own horn day in and day out. Why just yesterday you said, and I quote, 'An earth pony like you could never keep up with a speedy pegasus like me.'"
"O.k., so I like to brag." Rainbow Dash said "The point is I know I'm better than everyone else. But Trixie, I guess she never heard that the most powerful unicorn in town is right here!"
"Rainbow Dash! Although there is nothing wrong with a little healthy pride, braging and boasting all the time is not polite, and to be perfectly honest it's something that I've grown tired of." Rarity said "You might be better at certain things like racing, and flying. But I know for a fact that you couldn't sew to save your life, and yet you never hear me bragging about how good I am at making dresses."
"Rarity's got a point there." Applejack said. "To me I don't think Trixie's half bad, although I do wish she'd stop talking all the time, she's like the thing that won't shut up."
"And I most certainly think she's got a bit of an inflated ego." Rarity said "But then I suppose that's to be expected with magicians and illusionists."
"She seems nice." Pinkie Pie said "But even I can tell that Ursa Major story is a lie."
"I just think she shouldn't be talking in the third pony so much, I mean I'm not the only one who's getting tired of hearing The Great and Powerful Trixe, right?" Fluttershy chimed in.
"You're right." Twilight said "But I have to ask, if she's so annoying then why are you all staying?"
"Because there's nothing else to do Twilight." Rainbow Dash said "The instant that wagon arrived everypony raced right over here, everywhere else is deserted."
"Guess that explains why we didn't see anypony before we ran into Snips and Snails." Spike said.
"Hey you, all seven of you!" Trixie said "Do you have something you wish to say to Trixie?"
Rainbow Dash was about to speak up but Applejack stopped her "Not at all." Applejack said.
"Trixie thought so." Trixie said "So please be quiet. If you don't like the show you're free to leave."
No one did however and the show resumed.
"Now for her next act the Great and Powerful Trixie will need a volunteer from the audience." Trixie said. She scanned the crowd pretending to consider a few ponies. She already knew who she wanted to pick. "You." Trixie said pointing to Applejack "Please step forward."
Applejack did so and joined Trixie onstage. "What is your name?" Trixie asked.
"My name is Applejack." Applejack said.
"So tell Trixie, what is it that you do best?" Trixie asked.
"Well I'm pretty good at apple buckin." Applejack said.
"Anything else?" Trixie asked.
"Well I'h also happen to be pretty darn good at rodeos, and I'm very skilled at rope tricks." Applejack said.
"Then perhaps you'd like to demonstrate those 'skills' in front of everypony." Trixie asked "Unless you're afraid."
"I ain't afraid!" Applejack said "Just watch." Applejack started off performing moves, but before long she started doing moves that were so complicated even Trixie was having a hard time observing. When Applejack was finished the crowd burst into thunderous applause. "What do you think of that Trixie?" Applejack asked.
"You are good, Trixie will give you that." Trixie said "But now Trixie thinks it's time she showed you a trick that you've never heard of." Her hat began to glow light blue, and was lifted off her head to reveal a horn. She focused magic on the rope, which began to slither like a snake.
Applejack was rendered speechless and the crowd watched with intrest. Suddenly the rope began to coil around Applejack until her legs were completly hog tied. Trixie then stuck an apple into Applejack's mouth. The audience burst into laughter as Applejack began to hop offstage, although her friends certainly weren't laughing.
"That's what Trixie likes to call 'The Wormy Apple'." Trixie said.
"Applejack, are you alright?" Twilight asked as she removed the apple from Applejack's mouth and untied her.
"I'm fine Twilight." Applejack said.
"But Trixie used her magic to trip you up at what you do best. That isn't fair!" Twilight said "How can you be o.k. with it?"
"Because in all honesty I think I deserved it." Applejack said "I don't really like admitting it but I was starting to get carried away up there. I was about to start boasting about how nopony could beat me in a rodeo. I was basically stooping to Trixie's level."
Apparently those last few words fell on deaf ears as Rainbow Dash flew onto the stage. "You want a REAL challenge?!" she asked Trixie.
"And you are?" Trixie asked.
"I'm the one and only Rainbow Dash, and the instant you decided to make fun of my friend Applejack you sealed your fate!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Oh really?" Trixie asked. She hadn't planed on facing Rainbow Dash, or anypony else for that matter, but she knew she could find a way to make this work.
"Yup!" Rainbow Dash said "You think you're so awesome?!"
"Maybe Trixie does and maybe Trixie doesn't." Trixie replied "Trixie assumes you're willing to show these ponies what you do best?"
"Darn right I am!" Rainbow Dash said "I'd like to see how good your magic is against my awesome flying skills!" With that Rainbow Dash took off into the skies. She pulled off a series of impressive aerial stunts, and ended with a minature rainbow appearing over her wings when she landed. "See Trixe?!" Rainbow Dash said "They don't call me Rainbow and Dash for nothing! Good luck trying to top that!"
"Trixie accepts your challenge." Trixie said and she fired a beam of magic at Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash watched in horror as the mini rainbow began to expand, and began to envelope her. Before long it had created a mini rainbow tornado which lifted her off the ground, sent her flying through the air a little, and then brought her back down to the stage, the auidence erupted with laughter. Rainbow Dash was dazed but unharmed.
"Trixie would like to call that 'Rainbow Crash', but Trixie feels like she'd be touching a nerve." Trixie said as she helped Rainbow Dash to her hooves "You'll be okay. Trixie does not believe in violence."
"I can't believe she beat me!" Rainbow Dash said as she made her way off the stage.
"Ya got what was coming to you." Applejack said.
"What do you mean by that?!" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Whether you admit it or not you were basically being as much of a show off as you claim Trixie is. Trixie dealt you a slice of humble pie." Applejack explained.
"Did someone say pie?" Pinkie Pie asked.
"It was a figure of speech Pinkie." Applejack said.
"Darn." Pinkie Pie said.
"Does anypony else wish to volunteer?" Trixie asked.
One by one Rarity, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie stepped forward. And one by one Trixie defeated them in a face off. Rarity was amazed to discover that Trixie knew a spell that allowed her to change her hat and cloak into any number of colors. Fluttershy was surprised when Trixie managed to tame Angel Bunny. And Pinkie Pie very nearly had a break down when Trixie cast a very meancing looking illusion, which she failed to shake off.
"I simply must find a way to master that spell. I could make good use of it." Rarity said.
"I can't believe Trixie managed to get Angel to behave that easily. Even I have trouble with him." Fluttershy said.
"Those illusions were so strong. Even when I tried to laugh them away they wouldn't budge." Pinkie Pie said.
"I hate to admit it but that Trixie has some real skill." Rainbow Dash said.
"For once I agree with you Rainbow Dash." Applejack said "She might only be a traveling show mare, but her magical skills are a force to be reckoned with."
"And of course she's likely going to challenge Twilight next." Spike said. He had no sooner spoken those words when Trixie pointed a hoof at Twilight.
"So do you wish to challenge The Great and Powerful Trixie?" Trixie asked Twilight.
"Uh no thank you. I think the auidence already knows who would win." Twilight said sheepishly.
"You are right." Trixie said "That's very smart of you to refuse a challenge you know you can't win. Now then is there anypony else who thinks they are better than The Great and Powerful Trixie?" This time nopony said anything or stepped forward. "Well then seeing as there are no more volunteers Trixie will now move on to the grand finale. Hope you all like fireworks." And with that Trixie's cart started to shoot fireworks into the sky from the various tubes on the sides. After a while the fireworks stopped and the show ended. Everything went back to normal for the time being.
"And you all had your doubts about her." Twilight said.
"She's kind of like you in a way." Spike said "Only more smug and confident."
"Twilight's confident." Applejack said "But she's also smart. She knows she doesn't have to go around showing off like Trixie. Besides that excuse she came up with was techincally true."
"Yeah, everypony in town knows Twilight's the best at magic." Pinkie Pie said "Too bad Trixie doesn't."
"I still wish I knew what she did to get Angel Bunny to behave." Fluttershy said "Maybe if she sticks around for a while I'll be able to find time to ask her."
"First thing tomorrow I plan on dropping by the library to see if I can find that spell Trixie used. It could really help my business." Rarity said.
Spike was, needless to say, excited to hear that his crush would be coming over for a visit. "I've got to find that spell for Rarity. That's sure to impress her." he thought to himself.
"What do you think Rainbow Dash?" Applejack asked.
"Well I wish I could say she's still a stuck up mare who seems to have nothing better to do than boast, but then that'd be a case of the pot calling the kettle black." Rainbow Dash said "I guess if you all don't have a problem with her I don't either. But all the same I'm not sure if we can fully trust her."
"We'll just have to keep our eyes peeled then." Twilight said "And if she tries anything funny we'll make sure to put a stop to it." Just then she was reminded of her inital reason for stepping outside "What do you say we discuss this over lunch?" she asked.
"Sounds good to me." Pinkie Pie said.
"Oh goody, and I believe it's my turn to pick." Rainbow Dash said. "Follow me, I know the perfect place." And with that the six ponies and Spike set off. Little did they know that in a few hours this peace would be disrupted.
In another part of Ponyville Trixie had been pleasantly surprised at how many ponies wished to meet her once her show was over. She had never had many fans before. "I usually just get one or two, and usually all they ever do is ask me how I performed a certain spell. I'm not doing this for a living but surely a little appreciation isn't too much to ask for, right?" she thought to herself.
Her thoughts were interrupted as Snips and Snails came forward. "Hello Trixie." Snips said.
"We just wanted to say that we think you're the most amazing unicorn ever." Snails said.
"The Great and Powerful Trixie is flattered." Trixie said "But surely you don't actually think Trixie is that amazing."
"But we do." Snips said.
"Yeah and we want to be just like you when we get older." Snails said.
"I sure hope not. Especially since you don't know what my life is like." Trixie thought to herself. Fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, Snips and Snails didn't notice the somber look on her face.
"Trixie would like to ask what brings you two here?" Trixie said recovering.
"We were wondering if you might be willing to teach us how to use magic." Snails said.
"Surely you two don't need any help. You already have a grip on the basics of magic, don't you?" Trixie asked.
"Actually no." Snips said sadly "Our parents have been very busy, and so they haven't had time yet."
"What?!" Trixie said. She was surprised to hear such a thing. "Do you mean to tell Trixie that no one has bothered to teach you two anything?" she asked.
"We don't know anyone who's good at magic aside from you and Twilight." Snips said.
"Then why don't you ask her?" Trixie asked.
"Because if we do then Twilight will talk with our parents, and they recently insisted that they and they alone would teach us." Snails said.
"So you're asking Trixie to teach you two how to use magic against the wishes of your parents?" Trixie said.
"Just a little bit." Snails said.
"Please?" Snips begged.
Trixie tried her best, but she was unable to shrug off the puppy dog eyes that the two colts were giving her. She sighed. "Oh alright. Trixie supposes that she could teach you two, just this once."
"Yay!" Snips and Snails cheered.
"But only on one condition." Trixie said.
"What's that?" Snips and Snails asked.
"You must never tell anypony about this. Trixie doesn't need any more trouble." Trixie said.
"We understand completly." Snips said.
"We're ready when you are." Snails said.
"Good, now pay attention." Trixie said.
After traveling to a more remote location, where she was sure nopony could see her or Snips and Snails, Trixie spent the next few hours teaching Snips and Snails everything she knew about the basics of magic. She taught them when to use their magic and when not to use their magic. She even taught them how to perform some of her low level tricks. But eventually she noticed how late it was getting.
Trixie had no trouble getting back to her trailer. After all her time spent wandering from town to town she had a keen sense of direction. She was even sometimes heard to say "The Great and Powerful Trixie never gets lost."
Unfortunately the same couldn't be said for Snips and Snails. The two of them had failed to mention to Trixie that they had never been outside of Ponyville before. This was now coming back to bite them in the butt.
"I knew we should've taken that left turn back at that tree." Snips said.
"Uh I think we passed that same tree three times already." Snails said.
"Oh that's just great! Now we're lost!" Snips said.
"Calm down Snips." Snails said "Let's just find somewhere safe to sleep and we'll try to find our way back in the morning. And if worse comes to worse our parents are sure to notice when we don't come home, and will get the town to send out a search party."
"That's a great idea Snails." Snips said "I never knew you were so smart. The only question now is where we're going to find that 'safe place'."
"Well there's a cave right over there." Snails said "Why don't we go in there?"
"I don't know Snails, it seems awfully dark in there." Snips said.
"So, we'll just light up the place with that illumination spell that Trixie taught us." Snails said.
"Then what are we waiting for?" Snips said "Let's go inside and try to find someplace to sleep."
What neither of them could've known was that this precise cave was already inhabited, and they were about to wake up one of the sleeping residents.
"Gee, it's kind of dark in here." Snips said "Hey Snails, do you think you can cast that illumination spell?"
"I can try." Snails said and his horn began to spark. The spell prooved to be very difficult for him. and although neither Snips or him could see it, he was straining from the amount of energy he was using up. Then a small beam of light began to emerge from his horn. It slowly began to grow "Hold on. I've almost got it." he said in between grunts. Finally the light became bright enough for him and Snips to see each other. "I did it." he said wearily.
"Alright!" Snips said loudly "You did great Snails! Trixie would be proud!"
"Yeah!" Snails said.
Suddenly Snips and Snails heard a loud growl.
"Um w-was that your stomach Snails?" Snips asked nervously.
"No." Snails said "Was it your stomach?"
"No." Snips said.
"Then where's that growl coming from?" Snails asked.
The growl was heard again. Snips and Snails turned around, and found themselves face to face with a gaint blue bear with red eyes. He had apparently been woken up by Snails illumination spell, and needless to say he wasn't very happy.
Snips and Snails screamed at the top of their lungs and ran out of the cave. The bear was right behind them.
"How did we manage to wake up an Ursa Major?!" Snips asked.
"I don't know!" Snails said.
"What are we gonna do?!" Snips asked.
"Hey, didn't Trixie say she vanquished an Ursa Major before?" Snails asked.
"I think so!" Snips replied.
"Then let's bring the bear to her and have her send it away!" Snails said.
"That's a great idea! Now we just need to find our way back to Ponyville!" Snips said.
Suddenly the two noticed a sign pointing towards Ponyville. They ran into town as fast their hooves could carry them. The sun had already set, and most ponyville citzens including Twilight and her friends were already fast asleep. Or at least they were until the "Ursa Major" came rampaging through town. The town's ponies awoke with a start.
Snips and Snails raced up to Trixie's cart. They banged on the door.
Trixie was not happy to have been woken up. "You two." Trixie said "What are you doing here? Don't you know the Great and Powerful Trixie needs her beauty sleep?!"
Before either Snips or Snails could reply there came a load roar. Trixie looked up and saw the "Ursa Major" heading straight for her. She along with Snips and Snails ran and managed to escape. The same could not be said for Trixie's cart however, which was crushed by one of the "Ursa Major"'s gaint claws.
"Is this your idea of gratitude?! Trixie teaches you two magic and you bring her an Ursa Major?!" Trixie said angrily.
"We didn't mean to!" Snips said "But we got lost, and Snails decided we should try to find shelter!"
"We took shelter in a cave! But we somehow woke up the Ursa Major, and then we decided to bring it to you so you could banish it!" Snails said.
Trixie gulped. Now she wished she hadn't told that story. But she knew Snips and Snails were depending on her. She couldn't let them down.
The "Ursa Major" was still roaring furiously. Trixie knew she had to stop it. "Hear Trxie out Ursa Major! This is as far as you go! You shall not destroy this town! The Great and Powerful Trixie will not allow it! So pack your bags, because Trixie is sending you back to where you came from!" Trixie bellowed. She channeled as much of her magic as she could into a powerful blast and fired it at the "Ursa Major" "Begone monster!" she shouted.
Meanwhile in another part of town Twilight had just been rudely awaken by Spike. "You'd better have a very good reason for waking me up." she said as she cast an angry glare at Spike.
"The town is under attack!" Spike shouted. "The mayor asked me to wake you up because she thinks you might be the only one who can help!"
"Help with what?" Twilight asked.
"With an Ursa Major!" Spike said "The mayor told me that Trixie was trying to take it on alone."
The instant Twilight heard those words she sprang from her bed "Come on Spike!" she shouted "There's no time to waste! If we don't hurry Trixie could become that Ursa Major's next meal!"
Trixie panted slightly. She was certain that the "Ursa Major" was no more. She was about to leave when the smoke cleared to reveal the "Ursa Major" still standing, and without even a scratch on it.
"What?!" Trixie said. "Impossible! There's no way you should've been able to shrug that off! You should be back in the cave you came out of!"
The "Ursa Major" let out another loud roar. It was so powerful that the force of it almost blew away Trixie's hat and cloak. Trixie began to panic. "That was the most powerful spell I knew ,and that Ursa Major just shrugged it off like it was nothing! I'm doomed!" And with that Trixie resigned herself to her untimely end.
Just as the "Ursa Major" began to draw close to Trixie a powerful blast of purple magic hit it, sending it flying back. Trixie opened her eyes to see Twilight running towards her. "Twilight! Thank Celestia you came!" Trixie shouted.
"Trixie, what in Equestria where you thinking?! Challenging an Ursa Major?! You were in way over your head!" Twilight scolded.
"Twilight, you don't understand!" Trixie said. "I can explain!"
"You'll have plenty of time to explain later!" Twilight said "For now I need to drive this thing off!"
"But I threw everything I had at it and I couldn't even scratch it!" Trixie said.
"Trust me, I know what I'm doing!" Twilight said "I'm not Celestia's student for nothing!"
"What are you going to do?" Trixie asked.
"Just stand back and watch!" Twilight said. Trixe did so and Twilight's horn began to glow. The familar purple aura appeared, but this time Twilight was straining. It was clear to everyone watching that she was using a lot of magic.
"Come on Twilight." Spike said nervously "You can do it."
The "Ursa Major" was enveloped in the purple aura and was lifted into the air. Then a gentle wind began to blow across the grass, creating a soothing lullaby. The Ponyville Water Tower was removed, the water safely stored elsewhere, a bunch of cows were milked, and their milk was stored in the tower, which now became a gaint makeshift bottle of milk. The "Ursa Major" happily began to suck on it as he slowly nodded off, and was carried back to his cave. Once all of that was done Twilight's horn stopped glowing.
Twilight began to pant, exhausted from having used so much magic.
Everyone cheered. Twilight sighed with relief, glad that the whole ordeal was over and done.
Trixie was amazed "How did you manage to tame that Ursa Major?!" she asked.
"It wasn't easy but I managed to use all of my skils to pull it off. Oh and that was only an Ursa Minor, not an Ursa Major." Twilight said. "Speaking of which it's time you told me exactly what happened before I got here."
"I'll tell you, but can we go somewhere a little more quiet?" Trixie asked.
"Why?" Twilight asked.
"It's complicated." Trixie said.
"Well I've got time. Let's hear it." Twilight said.
"Very well then." Trixie sighed. And so she told Twilight everything. Even the part about teaching Snips and Snails magic.
"So that Ursa Minor was accidentally woken up by Snips and Snails, who then brought it here so you could vanquish it." Twilight said "And then you tried to do just that, but failed. Is that right?"
"Yes." Trixie said.
"Well I hope you learned your lesson about boasting." Twilight said.
"Oh believe me I did." Trixie said.
"Now all that's left for you to do is explain all of this to the townsfolk. I'm sure they'll understand." Twilight said.
"Actually I wish to take the fall for the incident." Trixie said.
"What? You're kidding right?" Twilight asked.
"The Great and Powerful Trixie does not kid." Trixie said sadly "But I feel like this whole thing would've never happened if I hadn't taught Snips and Snails how to use magic."
"But Trixie" Twilight said.
"No buts." Trixie said "Trixie's decision is final."
And so Twilight reluctantly let Trixie explain everything that had happened to the citizens of Ponyville. To the surprise of both mares the citizens of Ponyville prooved to be very understanding. The mayor even told Trixie that she would get a team of builders to rebuild her cart. Twilight offered Trixie a place to stay until the cart could be repaired, but Trixie declined.
"The Great and Powerful Trixie does not stay in one town for long. Trixie always has and always will be a wanderer." Trixie said "Trixie thanks you for the offer though."
The next morning Trixie left, but not before saying a few choice words. "Trixie thanks you all for being such a wonderful audience." Trixie said "Trixie wishes you all well and hopes that your lives will return to normal." Then she turned to Twilight. "As for you Twilight Sparkle." she said "You have done the unthinkable. You prooved who the better unicorn was and Trixie realizes she still has a lot to learn. But someday, when Trixie feels she is strong enough, she shall return, and when she does all of Equestria will see who the highest level unicorn really is. Until then Trixie hopes that you don't slack off on your studies. The Ursa Minor may be gone but you haven't see the last of the Great and Powerful Trixie, so remember the name. For one day, Trixie will be back!" And with that Trixie took off. She cast a cloud of smoke to cloak her exit but for some reason the smoke cleared after only a second, and everyone could see Trixie running off.
"Well girls, it looks we were all wrong about Trixie." Twilight said.
"Yeah, I guess so." Rainbow Dash said "Just don't keep reminding me of it."
"I have to agree with Rainbow Dash." Rarity said "Let's just say that wasn't our finest moment and put it behind us. We'll still remember it but we won't bring it up all the time."
"Sounds good to me." Applejack said "And by the way Twilight it looks like you've got yourself a rival."
"Sure looks like it." Twilight said "Although I can't help but get the feeling that Trixie's return isn't going to be a pleasant one."
"Ah you worry too much Twilight." Pinkie Pie said.
"Pinkie Pie's right." Fluttershy said "I'm sure the next time you and Trixie meet things will work out in the end."
"Guess you're right." Twilight said "And it looks like I've got a letter to write to Princess Celestia."
"I'm ready when you are." Spike said as he pulled out a scroll and quil.
"Dear Princess Celestia." Twilight said "Today I learned that it's important to have confidence in yourself. Without confidence even the most talented of ponies is nothing. Of course it's important that you realize the difference between having confidence and being boastful. No one likes a bragger and actions always speak louder then words. Perhaps the most important thing a pony should remember is that what you say and do determines how others view you. But's it never too late to change who you are on the inside as long as you're willing to take that first step. Your faithful student Twilight Sparkle."
Spike breathed his green flames on the scroll and it was teleported to Princess Celestia.
"Well, what are we all standing around here for?" Twilight asked cheerfully "It's a beautiful day, so let's make the most of it."
And with that life in Ponyville went back to being normal. For now anyway.
And thus we have my 8th fanfic. A rewrite of some Season 1, Season 2, and Season 3 episodes that I felt could've been much better.
Now I hate to sound like a broken record but the episodes that were chosen are my personal opinion and I trust that you will all respect them.
As for this rewrite I hope you enjoy it.
I saw a couple of punctuation errors, but I mentally corrected them so I forgot where they were.
One of the many side effects of having the best teacher in the county.
You should rewrite The Mysterious Mare Do Well
2455288 Next is Look Before You Sleep, then Feeling Pinkie Keen, then Green Isn't Your Color, then Over A Barrel, then Luna Eclipsed, then Cutie Pox, then The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well, then Hearth's Warming Eve, then The Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000, then It's About Time, and finally One Bad Apple.
2455479 The big change will be that Pinkie Pie is present in an episode that clearly needed her (Seriously a Slumber Party and you don't invite Pinkie Pie who lives for parties, what the heck)
2455491 I won't entirley criticize her but she was kind of out of character in fawning over a slumber party. And of course the explanation at the start about the rainstorm is total b.s., how could the pegasus ponies just "miss" a scheduled drizzle and more importantly how does a massive storm that took down a tree which very nearly landed on a ponies house make up for missing one little shower?
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Respect an opinion? On the Internet?
You're funny.
I have one of those here.
can't wait for Season 3 episode 13 rewrite
2468812 Sorry but I'm not rewriting that, if you scroll down the comments section a little you'll see what episodes are being rewritten and which ones aren't.
If you want you can rewrite the episode on your own, no one's stoping you.
When's the Next Chapter? , I Actually Love This Story.
2516804 Should be coming out within a week. I'm sorry but finals were approaching and I didn't have a lot of time to write.
Next up is "Look Before You Sleep".
2455272 I will eventually. I know a lot of you will thank me for that.
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I can totally see why you chose that episode you chose here. I totally like how you present 'Boast Busters.' I know it's not listed, but seeing you rewrote this episode, why are you not rewriting 'Magic Duel?'
Chapter 1:
That's an awful lot of empty space at the end. Were you planning to add something later?
"Oh, so you're actually this guy in disguise? Well... shit."
I really like this! There are some typos strewn throughout the story, but it's looking really promising so far. I like all the episodes, even ones that have their flaws, but I'm also really interested in seeing them play out differently. I can't wait to keep reading!
I say...
Snips shouldn't be TOO stupid (which he is in EG)
Trixie should be actually DOING what they challenge her to; not assaulting RD with a rainbow passing it on as victory. Just levitate yourself and do some tricks Trixie! Basically, she should put her money where her mouth is.
Twilight's friends should have ALL tried to get her to challenge Trixie, not just Spike.
And maybe some other things.
Don't quote a line in Family Guy leading up to..........the Bird incident *shudders*
Megatron out.
I like the way you painted the character Trixie and showed much clearer image of how most of the ponies who challenged her were in the wrong, particularly AJ and RD. I think the moral made more sense for the episode and, overall, you did a good enough job that had I seen an episode -similiar- to this one on the HUB years ago, I probably would have become a Brony a lot earlier
Aside from some consistant punctuation errors, there was only one small gramatical error that stuck out:
"Well I wish I could say she's still a stuck up mare who seems to have nothing better to do then boast but then that'd be a case of the pot calling the kettle black."
You mean than. Easy enough mistake to make
3252550
Meg's, that's the one thing you and I can agree on...
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XDDDDD That's so true. 'Unicron' is in fact an anagram of 'unicorn'. Heh heh.
(No attacks intended, SuperPinkBrony12.)
Man, I never would have thought of this. Being anti-social, I really never would have. You have officially made my story look so bad.
I like this version better. Maybe some day you can get a job writing for MLP?
You know, I did like this a lot better. You made Trixie into someone with low self-esteem rather than someone who just boasts loudly for no reason.
Alrighty, I'm now looking at all of these in detail and after watching back the original, I can definitely see why this one needed a rewrite and it was a great read, far much better from start to finish, plus it leaves the door open for Magic Duel.
Nice job. You actually made Trixie an understandable and likable character.
You had to change Trixie a bit to make it work (when Snips & Snails complemented her she probably would've just took it rather than say "But surely you don't actually think Trixie is that amazing" for example) but overall made the episode not suck and that's something considering it's my least favorite episode in the series. Have a like.
You got me hooked. I'm gonna have to read more of these.
This was a standard Season 1 episode - had its flaws but not quite a shitstorm.
You did a much better job this than MLP Loops ever did.
On "Boast Busters:"
While certainly not bad, it does change Trixie around considerably. The problem that the Ponyville citizens had with Trixie wasn't just per say with her bragging. Rather than trying to outdo them, Trixie just ended up humiliated them and targeted anyone who knocked back against her boasting. In essence, there's bragging, and then there's being a jerk about it. You could be boastful and bragful but not downplay anyone's accomplishments or in essence, be a jerk about it.
Also, when you look at Trixie's further behavior, (especially in a Season 6 episode,) she mentions she does not dwell on her mistakes, preferring to forget them and move on. It does mean she actualy doesn't realize why she was disliked. Trixie's problem is that her boasting was obnoxious and unwarranted. She couldn't walk the talk if you will.
Here, while it does spresd thigns ut, it kinda looks like you made the other characters look foolish to make Trixie look better. I am somewhat intereted on the rest of this and I will look through everything to see what you got. Will I be critical on all your rewrites, probably not, but I would like to see this.
We all had our notions on how we'd rewrite the show and so on, but you gotta wonder if our stuff would be in line and such.
In my Shadow Wars Story Verse, Snips and Snails eventually make friends with Trixie, and she winds up (after the series) helping Snails in particular make it in showbiz. As Glittershell.
Aw, I like how you didn't make Trixie horrible.
Nice job.
Sorry to say, but lost, and I mean LOTS of OOC. Actrually, not just that.
1) Mane Six are just beginning learning friendship. Applejack still has pride, and Rainbow too. They BOTH would want to bring an absolute braggart, that not JUST brags, but puts others DOWN. Rainbow brags, fair enough, but she never tries to upstage others. There are FEW moments, but they are mostly cheating against Applejack, never upstaging publicly.
2) Even sensible ponies would want to shut Trixie up a little later. It would not be a matter of pride anymore, it would be a matter of simple principle. A magican obviously lies, and ask ponies to perform. Then doesn't simply perform better, no. She PUBLICLY HUMILIATES them. Do you want to say after that: "I deserved that". No, you freaking not. You might not see yourself better than anyone, but by god, if anyone makes you look worse in front of the whole town, do you let it slide?
3) Fluttershy is OUT OF CHARACTER. Even in latest seasons she does NOT, I repeat, DOES NOT speak ill of others. She does her damned best to be kind to EVERYONE. Discord, DISCORD, who mindraped her and her friends. Let me see. She HATED being model, but trying to please Rarity, she just kept quiet and kept going as a model. What else. The only time she steps up by herself was at a family, I think. Where Zephir was lasing about, not doing work. She snapped a little, when she was surrounded by fans... Thats... about all I can remember, when she wanted to have it really her way. By HERSELF.
Dislike. I'll see if your other chapters work in any way, but for now, this.
Having just recently re-watched this episode, I'm... not 100% sure how to interpret this remake, partially because I'm not 100% sure how to interpret the original episode. It just had a lot of that 'early-season roughness' for me, which I think kind of strangled the interplay between Twilight, Trixie, and the episode's side-characters under one-off sight gags and kept the characters more shallow overall.
With that in mind, I think the idea of a rewrite that makes Trixie more reasonable has some significant potential, but while this particular presentation does get that central idea across, it is undercut in some important ways. The prose and structure of the narrative seem very simplistic in the way that it's structured; it feels like we're being talked down to like kids in a way that the show itself avoided doing once it really got good. As a big part of that, this narrative tells a lot more than it shows, with either character dialogue or the narrative itself telling us how characters feel instead of describing visible actions that would indicate those internal, abstract elements to the reader. Additionally, a lot of the sight-gags from the show are copied or slightly changed, even though they didn't really add much to the overall plot, and a lot of them don't really work (to the degree that they worked to begin with) when written out as opposed to being visual.
Still, I am interested in continuing and seeing how these develop.
Can you debrief on what’s changed from the real episode to this story where you put something additional and different?
9609041
Ikr, Trixie humiliated them in the original, of course, they'd speak ill of her.
This is my analysis of the original episode and your story:
In the original episode, we have a traveling entertainer, offering free shows with a TipJar for earning her living. If one does not like the show, one can leave. If one likes the show, one can stay and tip. She has an over-the-top stage-persona, which she needs to draw the crowds. She is a bit overly aggressive to hecklers; but unfortunately however, this is maddeningly hard to get right.*
* I remember an interview with Penn of Penn & Teller, where he talked about their free-show days with a TipJar in the 1970s, when they just started. If they would be to gentle on hecklers, the hecklers would ruin the show. If they would be too aggressive, they would drive away the audience themselves.
2 stupid colts believed the obviously fictional story of her vanquishing an Ursa Major and idiotically lure an Ura Minor into town. She bravely tries to vanquish it, but it destroyed her wagon.
After Twilight vanquished the Ursa Minor, rather than turning on the moronic colts, the town turns against Beatrix Lulamoon, driving her unfairly out of town.
Your Story:
You try to address these problems, your story addresses these issues, but a bit sloppily. That is okay, because with practice, you will improve. Your version is at least as good as the original story.
It's been a while since I last watched this episode, but from what I recall, AJ and Rarity (and RD via osmosis) pretty much started booing Trixie right out the gate. Then they had the self-righteous bit of "t'aint honest" and what not...so that was one change that I liked about your version, yeah they didn't endear themselves to Trixie, but they weren't holier than thou hypocrites either. Also, If anyone should have been punished in the original episode, it was Snips and Snails, because as I understood it, they more-or-less deliberately "found" the Ursa for their new "idol". Your take on things was minutely better with it being an unfortunate accident, but still...that bit alone wasn't the best flavor for me so to speak.
On that note, I'm of the opinion that had things worked differently in the show, Trixie and Twilight could have become friends or barring that friendly rivals. I also seem to recall reading somewhere that the show writers never intended Trixie to be "likeable".