The Strange Cases of Twilight Sparkle

by DrakoGlyph

Case 27

Twilight found herself starting to lose speed in her reading. It was late afternoon, and the results of yesterday’s ‘Case 33’ had been logged into the notebook she then put in her saddlebag. “I’m heading out, Spike, you can head over to Rarity’s if you’d like. I’m sure Owlowiscious can take care of the library.” The owl hooted in accord, then perched himself on the statue on the table in the middle of the room.

She was heading on a short little flight to stretch her wings and visit Rainbow. There was just some compelling urge she had to go visit her most loyal friend. As she flew over to the cloud building that Dash called home, she pondered about the mysterious events of yesterday, how all her friend were trying to lurk. She made sure that there were no stray clouds or trees following her.

She finally reached the cloud house of none other than Rainbow Dash, complete with its small, permanent rainbow fountain. As she trotted up the little walkway from the end of the clouds, Rainbow appeared at the front door.

“I’m so sorry about yesterday,” Rainbow said, “I really don’t know what got into me…” she put a hoof to the back of her neck.

“It’s alright,” Twilight said, “I wanted to see you.”

“Oh? Do you want flying lessons?”

“Ohnonono,” Twilight said hurriedly, there were only so many times she could crash into the ground before her body would fail her altogether. She would prefer to save those times for an emergency.

“Well, I’ll teach you anything you want to know when you want to know it!” Rainbow beckoned her friend inside her house and they went through to the kitchen. The smell of one particular pastry was wafting through the air… muffins.

“Were you making muffins?” Twilight asked.

“Yeah, I was going to have some ready for Derpy. I know I’m constantly being hard on her, but it’s because I think she can do better, so I’m making some muffins.” Rainbow checked the cookbook sitting on the kitchen counter, then looked in the oven. “I just don’t think they’re supposed to be black like that…” Both of them usually left the baking to Applejack and Pinkie Pie. It seemed that Earth Ponies, amongst their brute strength and affinity to grow foods, were also excellent cooks. Twilight was secretly jealous. “Yeah, I think we need to start over.”

Twilight looked into the oven next to Rainbow. “So, you really like Derpy?” Twilight asked.

“She’s a good friend. I mean, although she’s older than me, I kinda find her like a little sister, always in need of protection.”

“Are you sure you don’t like her more than that?” Twilight was pushed by some deep desire inside her to ask that.

“What do you mean ‘more than that’?” Rainbow said, giving Twilight a strange look as she moved back from the oven to the cookbook.

“I don’t know, like say…” Twilight wasn’t quite sure how to word it. How might Rainbow Dash understand?

“Like say what, Twilight?” Rainbow asked. She was starting to get confused and worried about her friend.

“I don’t really know how to explain it… didn’t your parents ever talk to you about the bird and the bees?”

“Twilight?” Rainbow asked. “I hope you’re not asking me what I think you’re asking me.”

Twilight was being driven by some unknown compulsion. She wanted to question Rainbow Dash about this, and there was no real clear reason why. “Are you sure you really like Soarin’ the way you think you do, Rainbow?”

“What?” Rainbow asked in utter disbelief. What was Twilight really asking her?

“I mean, are you sure you don’t like mares more?”

Rainbow Dash could only scowl as she finally realized exactly what Twilight was talking about. “Twilight, I’m straight.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“Well, I mean I could be bi, but I do like stallions. Applejack once slapped me because I was drooling over Big Mac…”

“Perhaps we could test that theory,” Twilight said, teleporting Fluttershy.

“Ohdearme,” Fluttershy said quietly. “Is this because of me lurking yesterday? I’m so sorry!” She squeaked and buried her head in the cloud.

“Come on, Rainbow, do you like what you see?”

Rainbow merely stared at Twilight. “Twi, you’re drunk off the cider again, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m not drunk.”

“And you’re not fretting over a late homework assignment, are you?”

“Nope, all my assignments are on time or better,” Twilight said.

“Then why are you trying to get me to look at Fluttershy’s plot?” Rainbow pushed the ostrich that was Fluttershy out of her way as she stepped up to Twilight. “And if there was any mare that I would want to be with, you know it would be a Wonderbolt, Twi.”

Their eyes met, and Rainbow’s glare was enough to break Twilight out of whatever thought was running through her head. “I’m so sorry!” Twilight said, teleporting off to her library. “What in the hay was I thinking!?” This was certainly cause for another entry in her notebook. She figured she would hide out in the library the rest of the night and send Spike out if she ever needed supplies.

Case 27

I was fit with a sudden urge to question whether Rainbow was straight or not. I just hope she can forgive me for the lengths that this strange desire made me go through before I realized what was going on.

Either that, or I’m out one Element of Harmony. Got any loyal friends?

Your most faithful student,

Princess Twilight Sparkle

Comments

[BenRG]

Don't worry, Twilight; I think everypony doubts Rainbow's sexuality... or her gender... at least once in their lives.

[DrakoGlyph]

2275681 In my head, Rainbow's Bi. But that's me.

[Wonderstruck]

*spoiler alert*

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