Dinner Plans
"What was that Braeburn? I couldn't quite hear you." Twilight asked, concerned.
Braeburn jumped and turned, giving an awkward smile to the concerned princess, "It's nothing!" he turned back to the door and opened it
"Welcome to my home!" he gestured around "Let me go get my parents so they know you are here. They have been dying to meet you. Excuse me." he trotted off in presumably the direction of the kitchen.
Twilight was a little surprised by her host’s sudden abandonment, but did not take offense.
She made to step through the threshold, but an armored hoof blocked her path. After a nod from Blue Blazer, Bastion and Stonehoof went to either side of the door, and made their best attempts to look like they weren't assuming a breeching formation. Before the assault on the compound began, though, Twilight pushed the hoof out of the way.
"Please princess, please allow us to-"
"No, I think I will just go inside."
"Princess, but- this is- ... This is an unsecured compound! It's just standard protocol to have us inspect it for anything that could be hazardous to you!"
Twilight didn't buy it, that was obvious, but Blue Blazer kept up his bearing as best he could.
Unamused, Twilight continued past the stallion and on into the house.
Once she was about midway into the foyer she turned back to the ponies who stood outside.
"Well? Come in!" Twilight commanded.
The hoofmadens needed no more direction and came right in, joining their princess in the center of the room.
The guards followed inside, tentatively scanning the walls and ceiling for any traps or archaic symbology.
"Stop that already!" Twilight commanded, shocking the guards with her tone. "Braeburn is a good personal friend, and he has been more than kind hosting all of us while we are here. I will not let you be so openly hostile inside their own home while they are making us dinner!" She gave a huff, "Since it is apparent you don't respect my wishes, and you have already blatantly ignored my orders on many occasions before, I am regrettably forced to use pressure that you might actually respect!"
Twilight smiled deviously as the previously distracted guards were brought to sudden and absolute attentiveness.
"You brought this upon yourselves! If you don't stop acting like foals-"
The fear in the eyes of the stallions brought Twilight a guilty satisfaction as they awaited the price of further transgressions.
"-you are all going to bed without dinner!"
A pregnant pause filled the room as the threat was processed.
... and the stallions drew back in fear of the terrible threat. How could she be so cruel!
Before the reeling guards could recover, a pair of earth ponies descended upon the princess.
The stallion of the pair grabbed the princess's hoof between his and began to shake it with gusto. "Oh boy princess! Lil' Brae here's been telling us all about you, and let me say it's nice ta finally meet’cha face to face! Sorry we couldn't make it to the celebration, but we were so worn out from making all those pies that we couldn't possibly have participated and made it in time ta make ya a proper dinner. My name's Fritter by the way, and this here" he said releasing one hoof to gesture to the mare beside him, "Is ma' lovely wife Honey-Crisp."
"Now honey," Honeycrisp said, "We'll have plenty of time to talk over dinner. I don't want to make her majesty wait any longer than she has already." The calm mare directed her husband’s hoof to release the whiplashed princess's and turned them to the kitchen, "If you'll follow me!"
They were quickly brought to the home's dining room.
Twilight had been a little concerned with the farmers' ability to handle the logistics of a twelve person dinner, but when she saw the table, her fears evaporated.
Set for all twelve, Twilight assumed it could have just as easily held twenty.
...and fed all of Ponyville.
The thick wooden table was buckling under the weight of the plentiful bounty spread upon it.
"Have a seat dear! -I mean Your Majesty! We'll be eating just as soon as Lil' Brae gets his flank down here!" the last part was yelled out the door to the wayward stallion.
Right after the call, a clattering of hooves could be heard tumbling down the hall until the stallion source came through the doorway.
"Now where ya' been? Ya' shoulda seen our faces when we walk through our house and we find a princess waiting in our foyer! Why didn't ya' come get us!"
"I, uh-" Just as at the front door, the guards could again see the mixture of nervousness and fear had returned to the stallion's face.
"-Well, I guess it don't matter none now anyway. Come over here so we can get this princess fed already!"
Heaving a sigh of relief, Braeburn sat down at the table.
Unseen by the others, Brush gave one last nod to the girls confirming their plans and resolve.
Carefully planned out before them was how they would get their star-crossed lovers together, starting with an elaborate but believable plan to get their princess and host alone together.
"Now what would you like to drink princess?" Honey -Crisp asked, oblivious to the signals of the plotting mares.
"Do you have coffee?" Twilight asked hopefully.
"Sure as sugar do princess! We actually just brewed a pot! I knew I forgot something... Let me just go get that!" Honey-Crisp happily jumped to serve.
With another nod specifically from Brush to Breeze, the operation began.
"Here," Brush said, jumping up to join the old mare, "Let me get it. You just stay here and relax."
"Well that's mighty kind of ya' darling!" she sat back down and Brush went off to the kitchen.
"So how have things been going here in Appaloosa?"
Brush didn't hear the answer to the princess's question as she rushed out of the room.
Only one door separated the kitchen from the dining room, and she found the coffee pot was calmly steaming in the corner.
She gathered up the pot.
Why'd it have to be coffee? I really hope Dasher was telling the truth...
With an anxious glance to the still steaming pot griped in her teeth, Brush pushed open the door and returned to the dining room.
Ok, now...
A quick glance revealed that, just as choreographed, Breeze was right next to the princess. Just close enough that as Brush approached, she could ‘accidentally’ stumble into her and spill the staining liquid upon the princess.
Please be right about this...
Just as planned, she tripped convincingly and the coffee flew.
The room's ponies gasped as they saw the inevitable conclusion of the liquid's journey.
Still steaming, the staining beverage engulfed the princess in its deluge.
...and nothing. She drooped her head due to the unexpected weight of her now-wet mane, but otherwise did not react to the smoldering liquid.
"Oh dear Celestia! Are you alright princess? I'm so sorry! I just tripped and-"
Twilight's raised hoof cut her off, "It's no problem, I'm alright." she said looking back over her wet wings, "Nothing a quick shower can't fix."
"Well, we better get you in one right away then!"
"We'll escort the princess-" Blue Blazer said, rising from his seat, only to be cut off by Cloud.
"Where? Into the shower? I'm sure you would. We'll take it from here."
And with that, the hoofmadens whisked the caffeinated princess out of the room leaving three guards and one very embarrassed guard captain with their hosts at the overstuffed table.
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This is where i would yell first!
Also great chapter
how...how? how do you just shrug off steaming hot coffee to the face?!
2868117
the same way you shrug off death: being immortal^^
2868153 huh, i'm just gonna go with 'magic.' blaming magic always works for the unexplainable
2868164
well the reason we feel pain is to prevent us from dying but chapter 11 showed allicorns can´t die so i´m guessing twis body said "fuck it" and put away this useless pain stuff^^.
Well it could have been tea, not that it would have been any better, with all this build up I don't quite know if there's going to be any Bralliy or a bait 'n switch.
2868198 pain comes from nerve endings. if she doesn't have nerve endings, then how does she feel anything? nope, just gonna say 'magic' and leave it at that.
Darn, I was hoping we'd get to see her guards...escort her to a steamy, hot shower scene.
2868236 huh, you just took my 'magic idea and gave it a solid reason for it being magic. sweet!
2868236
Earlier in the story, Twilight added that after she got back from dealing with the lupus, she found out that she doesn't feel pain anymore.
2868212 Pain comes from the same nerve endings that cause pleasure. There's a mental switch that tells you which is which -- same as with heat and cold. It'd be trivial for your brain to just ignore sensation that would be classified as pain.
Must be a mountain of cake and food then. XD
Thing is that even if Twi can´t feel pain her brain might still be used to her pain thinking which would get her to oh shit hot coffe on me SCREAAAAAAAAmoh wait, i don´t feel pain, right ops. At least i thought so.
But man, the hoofmaidens are cruel. Hot coffe over the pony they´re supposed to serve.^^;
And poor Guards are so close to go to bed without dinner. Poor buttmonkeys. XDDD
Well already this plan is not going so well.
.... i really hope somepony tries to assassinate twilight and she will be like
2869307
Y'know... it'd be interesting if that bit her in the flank later. Gets injured, feels intense ecstasy.
Are they all foals?!
2874072
So she can't get laid
discord must be fucking rolling around wetting himself at this point