A Warm Welcome
"Sniper!" Shouted Blue Blazer.
It was in fact not a sniper, as the group saw, but war.
Buffalo charged as ponies defended hay bale fortifications. Pies flew indiscriminately, hitting young and old, armed and unarmed alike. Ponies and buffalo lay strewn about the town, faces obscured by the pastries that claimed them.
"Princess!" the girls cried as they huddled around the fallen alicorn. The guards formed a perimeter around them.
"Back to the train!" Blue Blazer shouted just in time to turn and smack face-first into the train's closed doors.
The train blew its whistle and pulled away, leaving the group stranded in a war-zone.
Stonehoof cast a shield around them.
"Can we move her?" He shouted to Dasher who dropped to examine her.
"It was only a glancing blow. She should be fine." he said as he helped her up.
"Let's move!" Blue Blazer shouted as they began retreating to the nearest building.
Twilight did not follow, instead she charged her horn and a nearby pair of fighters were frozen in place. She trotted over to the scene.
They were frozen like a picture in the positions they stood in before the magic touched them.
One was a yellow stallion with an orange mane. He stood frozen on his hind legs, pie in a raised hoof, looking downward as if about to deliver a finishing blow.
The other was a young buffalo, who wore a purple and white triangle-patterned headband. She was cowering on her back, spindly legs attempting to cover her fear-etched face.
Twilight removed the pie from the stallion's hoof and contained him in a shield. For good measure she placed one around the young buffalo as well before releasing the spell that froze them.
The stallion drooped down to all four hooves.
"Now wha'd ya have to go and do that for? I nearly had her! I was just about to fin-" the words caught in his throat as he turned to face the one who stopped him.
Twilight stood in full regalia, wings flared, horn lit, and flanked by royal guardstallions.
"Princess!" He shouted falling to the ground.
The young buffalo followed suit, appearing even more afraid.
"STOP!" Twilight commanded the crowd.
The bedlam around town all stopped dead at the command of the Royal Canterlot Voice. Ponies and buffalo alike turned and dropped at the sight of the alicorn and her guard.
When the last of the fighting stopped, and the whole town lay in silent bows, Twilight addressed the two she held in her magic.
"Little Strongheart, Braburn, What's going on? Did you block their stampeding grounds again?" she asked, a stern gaze leveled at Braeburn.
He fearfully shook his head.
"Did you try to force them to take down more of their trees?"
Little Strongheart, trembling, shook her head.
"Did you not give them the pies they asked for?" She surveyed the scene, "It seems there is an unnatural abundance."
They both shook their heads.
"Then why are you fighting?"
"-We'll explain princess."
"Chief, Sheriff," Twilight smiled as the crowd parted to allow them through. They approached bowing, stopping together just before Twilight's hooves.
"Princess"
"Your majesty"
They spoke in unison, giving bows as deep as a large buffalo and an old stallion could.
"Rise and tell me what is going on here."
They rose and eyed each other until sheriff Silverstar spoke.
"We're celebrating princess."
"Ya see, everypony and everybuffalo had so much fun last year during the great pie war, we decided to do it again. For fun this time."
"Yes, your majesty," Chief Thunderhooves continued "Today marks the one year anniversary of the agreement that brought peace to our people."
That explains the tight scheduling I guess.
"So this is all a misunderstanding?" Twilight asked, feeling a little relieved.
"Yes, your majesty, I would presume to say it was."
"And it is all in good fun?"
They nodded.
Twilight thought a moment "Then, I only have one thing to say. In the language of the Neighponese..." behind the crowd's back her magic surrounded a pile of 'ammunition' stacked near one of the hay-bale blockades.
"BANZAI!" She let loose all the pies at once, indiscriminately raining them into the crowd.
With the inclusion of the princess and her group, the war restarted with renewed vigor.
There were no survivors of the second battle of the pies. Muddled reports of the pie-massacre-princess would later be whispered as rumor and legend. From that day forth, no pony ate pie in the presence of Twilight Sparkle without deep fear in their heart.
She didn't notice.
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Don't bet against the alicorns - they've got an order of magnitude power advantage and a multi-millennia tradition of trolling.
Chief, Sheriff? It might have been a good idea to tell somepony the next time you're going to have a mock-war, especially if there was going to be a VVIP visit at nearly the same time.
Unless...
Unless they did tell Celestia and she simply... er... neglected to pass it on.
2681361pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw674_130510364996.png
Seems like a waste of good pie to me.
Guess this is the Equestrian equivalent of a reanactment. When you just shooting with pies you can use "real" ammunition.
Santahooves only comes around every Hearthswarming Day! You need one way sooner than that!
priceless!
Well looks like Twilight doesn't need her royal guards to defend herself. Not that the royal guards care.
WHY DO WE NOT FIGHT WARS LIKE THIS?
fantastic as always, can't wait for more
awesomeness
I am enjoying.
And while I'm tapped as a pre-reader for another writer already (and sometimes for a second), your chapters tend towards short, so if you need an editor, I can throw in my hat.
Yay! Braeburn! Strongheart! They're both here
Yeah, nice to see the mood lightening after Twilight's Lupus encounter
2681361 You-Damnit, Celestia!
I liked this chapter. It was funny.
i made need to re-read this, but i think the entourage just left Twilight in Appleloosa.
2683664 nevermind. just read again.
semi-obligatory.
dizzy.pestermom.com/csa/csa01marisa/csa01marisa0043-01.gif
browse through comments ...
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no one said it?
Pies will fly across the sky!
When a good Princess goes to war!
2683960 you are the most amazing person ever
2681375 something about that picture screams: "You've activated my trap card!"
Eep!
2681375 Whenever something bad happens, blame it on whoever's in power at the moment
>Banzi
>not banzai
That may have taken away from the impact for me, but I guess I was the only one
Best line in the whole story so far, and that's saying something.