Friendship is Epic - Book 2: Dat Mareami Heat

by FlareGun45

I'm On A Float!

Yeah it’s been chillin these last couple of weeks. It’s great that Candy and her sister made their peace. So far they’re doing okay together. What next? Well, I bet you’re probably wondering, what was I doing while the Too Many Pinkie Pies episode was on. Nothing…. I was at my shop working and then the Pinkies swarmed in and they kept touching my hair, which it was made me kick them out of my shop with a broom. That’s pretty much all that happened, nothing special, so I’ll skip that. But I do have a little story, and by little story I mean a story that’s probably over 10k words like most chapters in this story, while the One Bad Apple episode was going on. So before Babs Seed came into town, the first thing that happened (as I remembered) was that I was at my home, and I lost my name tag. Seem like a familiar plot to you? Well, this isn’t what the story is about; I’ll get to that, be patient.

So I was looking for my name tag because I can’t work at the shop without it. I looked inside my trunk, even threw all the worthless junk in there out, which caused a mess in the room, but I’ll take care of it later. It’ll probably clean itself up in a later scene cause that’s how cartoons work. As I continued looking, my name tag wasn’t in the trunk, so I looked in the closet. I threw all of the blue armors that were in there out and even checked all the pockets. I didn’t find my name tag, but I did find a few bits, and I put them in my vest pocket. I next looked in the dresser, then under the bed, and the room was a complete mess, but I couldn’t find my name tag.

“Aw c’mon! You kidding me?” I complained. “Why can’t I find my name tag anywhere?! It should be easy because my name is on it. Wait… I put my name on everything I own… well my face should be on it.” Just then, my friend Aqua came inside the room and looked pretty confused.

“Uh Flare, what ya doin?” he asked.

“Flare’s looking for his name tag.” I said in a third-person.

“Flare’s lookin for his name tag?” he repeated.

“Nooo! Does Flare have to spell it out for you?” I said to him sarcastically.

“Are ya speakin in third-person?” Aqua asked.

“Yeah, you got a problem with that?” I asked him grouchy. “Well you can just kiss my shinny red flank!”

“Why are ya mad at me? What did I do?” Aqua asked.

I took a deep breath and sat down on the bed. “Sorry, Aqua.” I said to him. “I guess Flare’s just in a bad mood right now because he lost his name tag. He can’t work without it. Flare’s been looking high and low for it, but he couldn’t find it anywhere.”
“So ya decided to look in MY room?” Aqua asked. Oh right, of course. I forgot, I was in his house, sorry for the confusion readers. Hee hee! Oh wow I sound like Michael Jackson.

“Wait, this is your room?” I asked.

“Yeah, you forgot?” he asked.

“Well then it explains it.” I said.

“Because my room looks nothing like yas?” Aqua asked.

“No because my name isn’t anything.” I corrected him.

“Ya put your name on everything ya own?” Aqua asked.

“Yeah I do. Don’t YA, Aqua?” I asked.

“Unless ya forgot when ya looked everywhere in my room.” Aqua reminded me.

“Yeah ya probably right, Aqua. YA YA YA YA YA!” I teased him.

“Umm… alright?” Aqua said.

“So do YA have any idea where my name tag is?” I asked.

“Not really.” Aqua said. “Unless ya have it on right now and don’t realize it.”

“No I checked, double-checked, triple-checked, quadruple-checked, and whatever five means checked.” I said.

“Well ya if leave your vest tag sticking out like it is now and face backwards, maybe your customers can look at your name from your vest tag.” Aqua suggested.

“What do I look like to you, Aqua? One of those mares that look hot from the back but ugly from the front?” I asked. “Like, do you think I’m a fat mare to you?”

“I don’t think that tactic works that way with ponies.” Aqua corrected me.

“If they’re standing on their hind legs, yes it could work that way.” I corrected him.

“If ya say so, mate.” Aqua said.

“Hey Aqua, can I treat you for breakfast?” I asked.

“Nah I’m good, thanks.” Aqua said.

“Oh but I insist. I made your room a mess. It’s one less karma thing for me to worry about, so technically I’m doing something for me to save myself from karma.” I explained.

“Well if ya put it that way, I guess it’s fair.” Aqua agreed. “Besides, Wind Racer’s the one that cleans everything up anyway.”

“Why? Because you tell her to or she offers?” I asked.

“She has to because it’s a tradition from our old village.” Aqua said.

“Are you serious, or is that just an excuse?” I asked.

“For all ya know, I’m serious.” Aqua said.

“Sounds about right. I can believe that.” I nodded.

“Hey Aqua? Why is six afraid of seven?” I asked.

“I already know this joke.” Aqua informed me.

“The answer is: Six is a number and therefore doesn’t have feelings and can’t be afraid of another number.” I said.

“I see.” He said, with an attitude that sounds like he’s saying ‘What did he say?’

“I see you’re in that ‘I don’t care’ type of mood so I guess we’ll just get going to the restaurant of your choice.” I said as I got off of Aqua’s bed.

“I don’t know where to go. Ya can pick.” Aqua offered.

“Ok I’ll just pick a restaurant that isn’t worth mentioning its name and we’re probably not going to go there anyway because something else pops up.” I said. So the two of us headed out of Aqua’s house and were on our way to breakfast. On the way over there we met up with Pinkie on some sort of… I dunno… a giant lettuce with doors and wheels. Well, it’s Pinkie Pie; I’ve seen her do weirder. I once saw her fly a kite made out of wood that’s on fire. I didn’t even think it was possible. She said that the wood she was using was magic wood from Everfree. I just took her word for it and decided to forget about it. I don’t want to know the answer of dividing by zero.

“Aqua! Flare!” Pinkie said excitedly as she jumped off her lettuce vehicle and landed on her head without hurting herself, and then she flips and lands on her hooves.

“I’ll pretend I didn’t see that.” Aqua said awkwardly.

“Sup Pinks?” I asked. “What’s with the giant cabbage?” Oh wow, Flare, really? You’ve been in cooking for Faust knows how long and you don’t even know the difference between a lettuce and a cabbage?

“It’s not cabbage, silly! It’s lettuce!” Pinkie corrected me. “It’s for the Summer Harvest Parade!” Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, we’re flashbacking back to summer. This actually takes place right after Water moves into town and before the Nightmare Night chapter and before Candy moves into town. In fact, this was before I met Crèmepop, so she’s not here yet either.

“The Summer Harvest parade, huh? It’s too bad. After seeing you with a food parade float, I wanted to have a giant pizza. I mean unless you can grow pizzas from the garden like those fat idiots from Wall-E thought, I’d totally have a pizza float!” I said.

“That would be so cool!” Pinkie said excitedly. “I would’ve had a hot dog parade float and called it an Oscar Myer!”

“I think one of those was already made.” I corrected her.

“Oh, then maybe I’ll make a bologna one.” Pinkie thought.

“Heh, you say it that way, but I say ‘bologna’ how it’s spelled, with an E in the end.” I said.

“Ya like making up words, huh mate?” Aqua asked.

“It makes me unique, brah.” I said. “I don’t care what other’s think. It may sound weird, it may sound weird, and I dunno why I said ‘it may sound weird’ twice- err, three times, but it makes me unique. Unless I’m talking to a boss (which nopony is with me) or a random stranger, as long as you’re talking that way to your friends, it’s fine. Wouldn’t you agree, Pinkie?” I asked her but she was already gone. “Oh, she’s already gone.”

“Yeah she left a while ago.” Aqua informed me as he was eating some pancakes.

“Huh? Since when did we get to the restaurant already? How long was I talking?” I asked.

“A while.” Aqua said. “A very long while.”

“Anyways Aqua, I was thinking; maybe we should enter the Summer Harvest Parade. Make an awesome float and win prize money!” I suggested.

“I don’t think it’s a contest, Flare.” Aqua corrected me.

“Well still, I’d rather win prize money to make up an entry fee.” I said.

“Well first, ya might need a flyer.” Aqua suggested.

“Somepony call for a flyer?” Crystal asked as she flew over to us and flapped her wings.

“Yeah, ya got a flyer for the Summer Harvest Parade?” Aqua asked.

“Oh, I thought you two wanted a pegasus?” Crystal asked.

“Well… you can help us out. How about a little pegasistance as we build ourselves an amazing float for the Summer Harvest Parade?” I offered.

“Nah. I’d rather build an AWESOME float for the Summer Harvest Parade.” Crystal said.

“So can you help us get a parade flyer?” I asked.

“I didn’t think a parade could fly.” Crystal teased.

I chuckled, “Oh Crystal, you dog!”

“Dog? Did you just call me a dog?” she asked me feeling insulted.

“What? Is that offensive?” I asked.

“YES!” she yelled.

“Flare’s sorry, Crystal.” I said. “Please forgive Flare!”

“Oh I’ll forgive Flare, but should I forgive you? Hmmm?” she asked as she gave me a dirty look.

“You’ll forgive Flare, but you won’t forgive me? WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!” I yelled. But then I calmed down quickly because it hit me. “Wait a sec…. I’m Flare. Which means you already forgiven me.”

“Yay!” Crystal cheered.

“I got a big grin on my face see? See the grin, Crystal? Aqua you see this grin on my face?” I asked.

“Yeah, I see it.” Aqua said. I bet Aqua was thinking I was crazy, but I was only being myself. “Hey, uhh, Flare? Is it alright if I go down to work now? It’s gettin late for me.”

“No problemo, brah! Flare will see you when his shift ends.” I said.

“Thanks.” He said. “You two have a great day.”

“You too.” Crystal said and Aqua trots away. “I like him.” She said.

“He said ‘you’ instead of ‘ya’. I think I bought breakfast for an imposter.” I said.

“So how about that parade?” Crystal asked.

“Oh this parade is going to be so much fun, Crystal!” I said excitedly. “We’re going to build a float, drive around in it, wave to everypony, and maybe I’ll even advertise my shop! I mean, should I though? I’m pretty sure everypony in town has eaten there before and if not, at least they probably hurt about it, so it wouldn’t make much sense to advertise something that everypony already knows about. What do you think, Crystal?” She wasn’t there. “Oh… she’s already gone.”

“Order up, bossman!” Bonnie said as she gave me a ticket order.

“And I’m at my shop already.” I said. “I really need to keep track on how long I talk.” Just then I felt my phone vibrate, so I took it out of my pocket and checked it. “I mean for realsies! I didn’t even know I poked Keith that many times!”

Meanwhile, Aqua was trotting across town on his way to work until he hears a loud “C’MON MAN! It wasn’t even a drop!”

“Huh?” Aqua asked as he looked over and saw my sister Water with a leaking fire hydrant.

“Ok maybe it was a little drop… it was a puddle… it was a wave… but it wasn’t a strong wave! Yes it was a strong wave.” Water said to herself all soaking wet from the water from the leaking fire hydrant.

“Hey Water.” Aqua said as he walked over to her.

“Oh hi horse.” Water said.

“Umm… ok?” Aqua said confusingly.

“Please excuse me, Aqua, but like Flare’s ‘sup brah?’ I like to make my own quotes too.” Water said.

“If ya say so.” Aqua said. “Having trouble?”

“Oh where to begin?” Water asked herself. “Well first I went over to the shoe store today to get new boots for my hind hooves when I saw the outrages price for them, so I had to steal money from Flare’s piggy-bank in order to get these shoes, but little did I know that it was secured, but luckily for me it was fragile, so I broke it, but it was only three pennies in there; just enough for Sheldon Cooper to do his knock!”

“No, I mean… are ya having trouble with this fire hydrant here?” Aqua asked more specifically. This is a narration, so I can say ‘specific’ right during narration.

“Oh this? Yeah it’s a bugger to work but I’ll get to it. All I need to do is use my watertastic magic on it and then seal the top right back on.” Water explained.

“Ya know how it broke?” Aqua asked.

“Oh I might’ve… umm… been showing off… a little bit of… magic.” Water stuttered nervously.

Aqua chuckled. “A little bit, huh?”

Water chuckled along. “Perhaps. For all you know.”

“I just did that joke today.” Aqua pointed out.

“Oh no way!” Water yelled out in excitement.

“Yeah.” Aqua nodded as he continued chuckling.

“Y’know, Flare said you weren’t really the joking type.” Water said.

“I have a little bit here ‘n there. I guess a little bit of Flare’s humor is rubbing off on me.” Aqua teased.

“Or Crystal’s. She seems a little more humorous than Flare.” Water said.

“Perhaps.” Aqua said.

“Either that or she’s dumb.” Water said.

“Aw c’mon, Water. Dumb doesn’t seem to be a nice thing to say to Crystal. I’d prefer to use the words ‘special pony’.” Aqua said.

“What does being special have anything to do with her being dumb?” Water asked.

“Didn’t like that?” Aqua asked.

“Well, I found it to be a ‘special’ remark.” Water teased. They both chuckled.

“Well I should get going, Water. I have tons of work to do.” Aqua said.

“Okie doke! Call me when you have the chance.” Water requested.

“I would if I had your number…… or a phone.” Aqua said.

“Well I’m sure we’ll be meeting sometime later anyway.” Water said.

“Of course.” Aqua nodded. “So ya have a great day, mate.”

“See ya, Aqua!” Water waved as Aqua trotted off. Aqua’s heart began to beat and she started to feel a little cold, but then again, it could be just the fire hydrant water. Water sighed as Aqua headed off. “Aqua’s so kind. He’s no Fonz, but he’s on my crush list.”

“Ey! Yous gonna help me with this leak or what?” a construction worker complained to Water.

Meanwhile over at my shop, I invited my friends over to discuss the terms for the Summer Harvest Parade. The Noble Six is going to compete in it; just as soon as I tell them though, so everypony except Aqua came over to my shop to hear the news. “Good news, everypony!” Professor Farnsworth said to my friends. “Ok I did my part. When will I get my money?” he asked me.

“You’ll get it in the mail.” I said.

“Ok. Although I’m still awaiting my check from last time.” Farnsworth said.

“You’ll get it, just… go! Nyeh!” I demanded in a whiny voice.

“Ok, ok, no need to get all snippy with me!” Farnsworth said with an attitude.

“What did he say?” Snips asked.

“Don’t get smelly with me?” Snails asked.

“Ew! Why would I smell an old guy? That’s gross!” Snips complained.

“I think I need to use the bathroom.” Snails said.

“NO! Get outta here!” I ordered the two colts and the two of them run off. “I can only take their ‘business’ for so long.”

“So why did you call us here, Flare?” Blaze asked.

“Well as Farnsworth said, I have good news.” I said.

“If it’s Farnsworth saying it, it can’t be good.” Engie said.

“Don’t worry, I’m the one explaining everything, so of course it’ll be good!” I said. “Now then, are any of you aware of the Summer Harvest Parade?”

“Yeah, you just told me this morning.” Crystal reminded me.

“Wow, time is flying today.” I said shockingly. “Anyways, I was thinking that we should build ourselves a float for the parade. We’ll advertise my shop and whatever useless businesses the four of you own.”

“I don’t own a business. I do research, and it is NOT useless!” Psyche corrected me.

“Wow, you’re thinking? That’s a first, Flare!” Crystal teased.

“Umm… what?” I asked curiously.

“You said ‘I was thinking’ before you said we should build a float for the parade so I decided to make a little joke to make you feel dumb.” Crystal explained.

“So why didn’t you say it just after he said that?” Psyche asked.

“I didn’t want to interrupt the conversation. I have manners too.” Crystal said as she crosses her front hooves and crosses her left leg onto of her right and then gives Psyche an ugly look, and then Psyche just smiles at her with his teeth.

“You have a piece of spinach on one of your teeth.” Crystal pointed out. Psyche sticks his hoof on his tooth in attempt to take it out, but it was still there. “It’s still there.” She pointed out.

“I have hooves; how am I supposed to take it out using them, genius?” Psyche reminded her.

“How about I stick my tongue on your tooth and I’ll lick it off.” Crystal suggested, but before she could do so, my PG rating increased to PG-13 rating. “Aww, are you kidding? Fine, I won’t do it.” she complained as the rating goes back down to PG.

“So ya wanna compete in the parade, partner?” Engie asked.

“Yeah, it’ll be a great way to show our stuff. Isn’t that right?” Blaze asked.

“Righteyo!” Psyche said. “But the question is: What kind of float should we use?”

“I thought the question was: To be, or not to be?” Crystal asked.

“Wow, this is a tough decision to make.” Psyche said. “But first I need to know if we’re going to be making separate floats or just one float?”

“One float of course to represent the Noble Six!” I said. “I mean can we afford multiplie floats, let alone build multiple?”

“Right but what type shall we make?” Psyche asked. “There are so many different choices of fruits and veggies.”

“How about kumquats?” Engie asked.

“Why kumquats?” Blaze asked.

“Because kumquats of delicious, soury, orangey, and ah doubt anyone else is gonna use ‘em.” Engie explained. “Plus kumquats is a funny word to say. Kumquats… kumquats, kumquats, kumquats.”

“Put the word pickle-barrel- err, words pickle-barrel in front of it and you got an even funnier word!” I pointed out.

“Pickel-barrel kumquats, pickle-barrel kumquats- you’re right! That is better!” Engie said. “So all in favor of kumquats? Ah!” Engie raised his hoof in the air but nopony else did. We just looked at each other and then at Engie with weird expressions on our faces. “Oh what? No one else wants a kumquat? Ah thought we agreed it was a funny word?”

“It is, but I don’t want to use it as a float theme.” I said.

“Well then… any of y’all got any better ideas?” Engie asked.

“How about a lettuce float?” Crystal asked.

“Pinkie’s already using that.” Psyche informed her. “The parade rules say no multiple foods of the same.”

“Ok then.” Crystal nodded. “How about a tomato?”

“Amethyst Star already is using that. Next!” Psyche informed her.

“How about a squash?” Crystal asked.

“Daisy is already using that.” Psyche informed her.

“Wait, I thought Neon Lights was doing squash?” Blaze asked.

“Nope. That’s a cucumber.” Psyche corrected him.

“I cannot know the difference between the two, you know brah?” I asked.

“You can, you just don’t.” Psyche corrected me.

“How about an apple?” Crystal asked. “Or is the Apple family doing one?”

“Nope, the Apple family is using a pumpkin.” Psyche corrected her.

“So apple is still available?” Crystal asked.

“I didn’t say that.” Psyche said.

“Whatever. I’m a PC type of a girl anyway.” Crystal said.

“Hey Flare!” Water said as she walked inside my shop. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”

“Well, actually, I’m about to order up some food.” I said.

“To who? Your shop is empty.” Water pointed out.

“There’s nopony in the shop right now? DANG IT!” I yelled. “Why must my store be empty? It must be Porker’s stealing my business again! CURSE YOU PORKER’S! Why does that name sound familiar to me?”

“You shouldn’ve kicked Snips and Snails out.” Psyche said.

“Yeah actually Flare, I wanted to speak to you in private.” Water said.

“Private as in where? Bathroom or lavatory?” I asked.

“Bathroom or lavatory?” Water asked.

“I MEAN… lavatory or office?” I asked as the two of us began laughing after my wording mistake and she should stop laughing at me because it’s mean and it hurts my feelings.

“Office is fine.” Water said.

“Ok but hang on a second. It’s a mess in there and I need to take some stuff out.” I said as I walked over to my office. “Wait here.” So I went inside my office and from the outside, Water heard me moving my junk over, and she even hears a cat screech inside. “Ok gotta move this here, and this here, what should I move out? Why do I have a cat in here? Ok here we go! Here’s the problem! This should give us plenty of space!” So I opened my office door again and took out a stapler and a pen, and I just placed them on the floor outside. “Ok there should be enough space now. C’mon in!” So Water followed me inside my office and saw that my office wasn’t really that messy.

“What’s the fuss about? There’s mess in here.” Water pointed out.

“I know. I just cleaned it out.” I reminded her.

“The pen and the stapler?” Water asked.

“Yes!” I said.

“Well then. I didn’t think staplers and pens take much space.” Water said.

“You know how many staples are in a stapler? A lot! So that takes a lot of space.” I said.

“How about the pen?” Water asked.

“I threw a blue pen out. Blue pens take the most space. Yes the color matters.” I said.

“Wow… racist.” Water said. “Anyways I need to talk to you about something, bro.”

“Hold that thought, sis.” I said as I took out a drawing of a kid with a pair of glasses. “Does this look like Harry Potter to you, or does it look like Arthur? “

“I dunno, Flare I might have a little problem.” Water said.

“C’mon tell me! I can’t really tell because of the clothing and the ears. If the glasses weren’t there, it might be less confusing.” I said.

“I’m sorry, Flare. But can you please listen to me?” she asked.
“What seems to be the problem, sis?” I asked.

“Well… it’s your friend Aqua. I met him today.” Water said.

“You knew him since you moved here.” I reminded her.

“I know, but I had a conversation with him today and… I dunno, I feel like… I might have a crush on your friend.” Water said.

“Ok, and?” I asked.

“That’s it?” Water asked.

“What else do you want me to say? Good for you? Ok there you go! Good for you, sis!” I said with an attitude. “Jeez you’re picky.”

“Well I didn’t think you’d be fine with it.” Water said.

“No it’s fine, Water. I’m just surprised you find him attractive.” I said.

“I know! I don’t get it either? But once we started talking I felt a feeling that I never felt before.” Water said.

“Wish I had a bit every time you said that.” I teased.

“Flare this is serious!” Water yelled.

“So am I. You know how many coltfriends I’ve seen you have? You always end up dumped in the end and I’m the one that has to hear all of it.” I complained.

“Well excuse me, but I’m your sister!” Water reminded me.

“And I’m the owner of the best pizza shop in Equestria. Any more obvious things you wanna say?” I asked.

“Why can’t you support me in my time of… umm… crushing?” Water asked.

“I do support you, Water, but in the end, you’re always just… I mean… I don’t wanna see you hurt again. I’ve seen your past coltfriends. They’ve been using you.” I said.

“Y-you think Aqua’s the same way?” Water asked.

“Wait… OOOOH! You were talking about Aqua?” I asked.

“Yeah. Who did you think I was talking about?” Water asked.

“Psyche.” I said.

“What made you think I was talking about him?” Water asked. “I said Aqua.”

“Yeah you kinda lost me there, I didn’t hear you say his name.” I said. “I thought you talking about Psyche because… well… it’s common-sense. He’s very attractive.”

“Yeah he is.” Water agreed. “But it’s Aqua that’s really been getting my heart to race lately. I mean… his accent, his looks, his personality! Not to mention, we both do a lot of amazing water spells.”

“Have you ever seen Aqua do magic before? How do you know he’s amazing?” I asked.

“You tell me about him all the time when we talked on the phone after I kept asking you to stop repeating conversations on ‘Mama Fluttershy’.” Water explained.

“HEY! Mama Fluttershy is amazing! She was pretty much the only Mane Six that begged me to come back to Ponyville after I ran off. Nopony ever begs to me.” I explained. “Except for that one time I kidnapped one of my bully’s little brothers in order to get back my Gamecolt from him, but… eh nevermind. Forget I said that.”

“So you think Aqua and I have a chance?” Water asked.

“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to try.” I shrugged.

“Thanks, bro!” Water cheered in excitement as she hugged me. I’d continue this conversation but I don’t want to hog the entire chapter. I want it to be mainly focused on Aqua and Water, so let’s begin with that. Oh, and in good time too! Right after Water and I exited my office, Aqua came in. “Aqua!” Water cried out in surprise.

“Hey Water.” Aqua said. “Hey mates.”

“Hey Aqua.” Psyche, Blaze, Engie, and Crystal greeted him, but not in those words though. I didn’t hear what they said individually, and if I don’t hear it, it’s not on the chapter.

“Hey Flare, can I have some fettuccini alfredo?” Aqua asked.

“Red or white sauce?” I asked.

“Since when was fettuccini alfredo red sauce?” Psyche asked.

“Not too long ago recently. With the help of Zecora, I was able to make red cheese sauce! It’s delicious!” I said.

“I guess I can try that.” Aqua nodded.

“Hey Aqua!” Water said.

“Hey Water.” Aqua said. “Also, Flare, can ya gimmie some water for to drink?”

“Give you what for to drink?” I asked as I gave him a glass.

“Oh, ya already got it. Thank ya!” Aqua said as he takes the water and sips it.

“So, umm… Aqua. I… umm… I’ve been thinking lately, and… well… after I talked to you a bit today I felt… w-weird.” Water stuttered.

“Did I offend ya in a way?” Aqua asked.

“Not, it’s not that.” Water said. “I mean… no, you didn’t offend me one bit. In fact, you pretty much complimented me in a way.”

“Like how?” Aqua asked.

“I… umm… hang on, gotta powder my nose. I mean… I have to freshen up. No wait! I mean… I have to use the restroom!” Water freaked out as she ran to the bathroom quickly.

“Oh… I’m sorry for this, mate.” Aqua said to me.

“Pfff!” I pouted. “Don’t worry about it, brah. She’s just a little shy about that crush she has on you.”

“Water has a crush on me?” Aqua asked.

“Ooooooooo!” Crystal said excitedly and giggled. “Somepony’s got a cru-ush! Hey Aqua, you better protect yourself from her muscles!”

“What makes ya think she has a crush on me? Did she tell ya?” Aqua asked.

“YA, she did-ya!” I said.

“Alright, please quit it with teasing my accent? I really appreciate it.” Aqua asked.

“You appreciate me teasing my accent?” I asked.

“Ya should know what I mean.” Aqua said.

“No seriously, the way you said it.” I pointed out. “I mean of course I get it, but what if there are actually ponies that don’t? I was just testing you Aqua! Strange ponies out there.”

“I know… and I’m looking at one right now.” Aqua said.

“OOOOOOOOOH SNAP!” Crystal yelled.

“So ya think I should go out with her?” Aqua asked.

“If you think so, but she tends to be sensitive.” I said.

“Ya pretty much looking at another sensitive pony right now.” Aqua said.

“Really? You’re sensitive?” I asked. “I mean, yes, you’re quiet, but I don’t normally see your feelings hurt that often?”

“My feelings get hurt pretty easily. I just don’t bother showing it because I’m already hiding the pain in my past.” Aqua said. “I’m used to it.”

“Are your feelings hurt now?” I asked.

“Actually I’m more curious, and a little bit surprised as well.” Aqua said. “Water, she seems to be a very nice pony, and if she has a crush on me… I’m willing to give her a chance.”

“Really?” I asked.

“Yep. I’ve never been in a relationship before, and I’m normally not a relationship type pony, but I’m always willing to try new experiences.” Aqua said. “I’m too usually, and if the mares are ever attracted to anypony in this group, it’s Psyche.”

“Got that swagger.” Psyche said.

Just then Engie whacks Psyche in the head with his wrench and yelled, “NO! No! Bad! Bad attractive pony! Bad!”

“OW!” Psyche yelled. “Ow! Ow! Normally I’d take that as an insult but thanks for calling me attractive.”

“No problem, partner.” Engie smiled at him as he whacked him on the head again.

“Ow!” Psyche yelled.

“So ya have no problem with Water and I dating?” Aqua asked.

“Would you have a problem if I dated Wind Racer?” I asked.

“She’s 15.” Aqua informed me.

“Really?” I asked.

“Yeah, she’s still a miner.” Aqua said. “So yeah, I kinda would have a problem with it.”

“Well I didn’t know!” I said in a squeaky voice in the beginning and a deep voice in the end. “Also Aqua, look at this picture; does this look like Harry Potter or Arthur?” I asked him as I showed him the same drawing that I showed Water back in my office.

“Phew!” Water said as she exited the bathroom while the toilet flushes behind her and a toilet paper is stuck on her shoe. “Glad I got that out of my system. Ok so what was I talking about again?”

“Ya want to go out with me?” Aqua asked.

“Oh good! You asked me so I didn’t have to stress myself to do so. I guess I won’t be needing this.” Water said excitedly as she throws a stress squeeze ball aside.

“Hey did you steal that from my office?!” I asked her angrily.

“Umm… no.” Water lied.

“LAIR!” I yelled at her. “How can I put up with you living in my trailer if you lie to me?!” I picked up the stress ball she threw aside and started squeezing it many times really fast. “Grrrrr!”

“So what do ya say, Water? Wanna go out?” Aqua asked.

“Wow, gosh, I… I don’t know what to say.” Water said nervously. “This is all so sudden.”

“It’s not like I’m asking to marry ya. It’s just a small simple date. Nothing much.” Aqua said.

“Well, I… umm… ok.” Water agreed. “Sure! Why not? I’d love to!”

“Good. So how about we meet at the Soup ‘n Salads tonight at 8?” Aqua suggested.

“Make that 8:30. I want to see the new episode of Two Broke Girls tonight.” Water said.

“Ok, 8:30 it is then.” Aqua agreed.

“Great! I’ll see you there!” Water said excitedly. “Oh my gosh! I should get ready!”

“It’s only 2 PM.” Blaze informed her.

“OH MY GOSH! Then I don’t have any time to lose!” Water yelled as she ran out of my shop in a hurry to get ready for Aqua’s date.

“So Aqua, you want to help us out in our parade float?” I asked.

“No thanks, mate. Being on a date for the first time is makin’ me pretty nervous. I’ll need to go do some research. I’ll check ya all later.” Aqua said as he walked out of my shop.

“I’m so proud of Aqua. Our little angel’s growing up.” Crystal said all teary eyed.

“I know, I’ve been grown up for a while.” The holy cow from the very first chapter of this story said.

“Oh not you, Holy Cow. We’re talking our friend Aquatic Armor.” Engie said.

“Oh… moo-kay.” Holy Cow said upsettingly.

“Hey how have things been going with you? It’s been quite a while.” I said.

“Not bad, not bad. I got me a full-time job at Chic-Fa-Le.” Holy Cow said. “Whoever eats at Chic-Fal-Le, I thank them with the praise of our lord and savior… me.”

“Got it! Best of luck to you!” I said.

“Moo too!” Holy Cow said as she flies off.

“You know it’s rare for a gag character to have two parts.” I said to my friends.

“I’m proud of you Flare. Despite what Mareami has done to you, and despite your awkwardness, you turned yourself into a great friend and helped out your sister AND Aqua.” Blaze said.

“And Water too.” I added.

“Now then, let us get started on working on my parade float.” I said.

“Wait, hold yer horses for a sec.” Engie stopped me.

“Ok.” I said as I put Blaze in a headlock.

“HEY!” Blaze yelled as he waved his arms around.

“What do you mean YER parade float?” Engie asked.

“Yeah, MY parade float.” I said.

“Who said it was yers?” Engie asked.

“I did.” I said.

“Excuse me, but I’m the one who mentioned there was parade in the first place.” Crystal said.

“Ok what are we doing?” Blaze asked.

“Being childish. Does it really matter who’s parade float it is?” Psyche asked.

“Yeah, yer right. Ah’m sure that type of friendship lesson on who this float belongs to is fairly obvious.” Engie said.

“How about we argue about what float to use?” I asked.

“Not very original, but I can’t think of anything better.” Blaze said.

“Well ah said ah wanted a kumquat float, didn’t ah?” Engie asked.

“And didn’t I say apple float?” Crystal asked.

“Well me, I choose a grape float. Mainly because that’s one of the only fruits I like. Green grapes, might I add.” Blaze said.

“I only like grapes when they’re hard and juicy, not soft and squishy.” Crystal said. “If any of you make a joke about that, I’ll rip off your eye-lashes!”

“We don’t have eye-lashes.” Psyche corrected her. “Scientific fact: male ponies cannot grow eye-lashes. It is a scientific impossibility. Eyelashes are only grown by female ponies… who go through puberty.”

“How about you Psyche? What kind of float do you want so we can argue about it?” Crystal asked.

“I dunno, if I had to pick… umm… plums.” Psyche said.

“Why? Because they’re your color?” Crystal asked.

“Umm… no… because I like plums.” Psyche corrected her.

“Well I pick olives because I-love it!” I said. “Get it? Olive it?”

“Olive and I-live don’t sound alike at all.” Psyche corrected me.

“Well you’re entitled to your opinion, Psyche.” I said as I patted his shoulder, and then I patted his other shoulder.

“Why did you pat both of my shoulders?” Psyche asked.

“I have this problem where what happens to one side has to happen to the other.” I explained as I lifted my hoof to explain to him and after I was done, I lifted my other hoof the same exact way. “Yeah.”

“So how are we going to find out who’s float we’ll use?” Blaze asked.

Before any of us could answer that queston, a small apricot, blank-flanked, pink maned filly comes into my shop and she asked in a Manehatten-type accent, “Scuse me? I’m looking for three fillies. One has a bow and the other has hair that looks like ice cream.”

“I dunno. You dudes know?” I asked my friends.

“Might have a hunch, but not so sure.” Engie said.

“What does the third filly look like?” Blaze asked.

”The third one looked like a chicken.” The filly said.

“OH! That’s much better! The Cutie Mark Crusaders! Yeah, I think I saw them tip-hoof passed here from outside. They looked like they were trying to avoid somepony.” I said.

“Yeah dats them. You seen them, buddy?” the filly asked.

“I think I saw them head over towards the movie theater. Why? They friends of yours?” Psyche asked.

“Somethin’ like dat.” The filly said.

“Alright well send them our regards and tell them best of luck to them at the Summer Harvest Parade.” I instructed her.

“Don’t worry. I will! Thanks!” the filly said mischievously as she chuckles and runs off.

“She seems nice.” Crystal said.

“Alright so let’s do this.” I said as I cleared my throat. “Aaaaah, I wanna do my parade float!”

“No I wanna do mine!” Crystal yelled.

“Kumquats are the way of the future! We must do a kumquat float!” Engie demanded as he slammed his hoof on the table.

“No! We must do grapes! They’re an important fruit, and they’re super-awesome!” Blaze demanded.

“NO! We must do- I’m sorry, don’t you all think this arguing is a lost cause?” Psyche asked.

“Yeah, we’re really going nowhere with this. We all know already that we’re not going to agree with this, and in the end, it’ll turn out we’ll combine our ideas into one.” Crystal said.

“Crystal’s right. We should just skip to buildin’ this float. Let the arguments set aside.” Engie said.

“I agree. So let’s just make a fruit-veggie platter float. What do you all think?” I asked.

”I’m ok with that.” Blaze said.

“Yeah same here.” Psyche said.

“Ditto.” Crystal said.

“Then let’s head over to my basement and get started. Perhaps we shall think of a conflicting situation while we build-up our float.” Engie said.

“I’m sure we’ll all think of an argument sooner or later.” Psyche said. “I mean we all do get aggravated over the simplest things sometimes.”

And just as you thought there wasn’t going to be any cutaway gags in this chapter; one shows Psyche at his house watching TV. “We interrupt this program to give you breaking news. Parasprites are invading Ponyville destroying everything that’s not food.” The news anchor said. “We have many buildings damaged and three ponies that passed out in fear. Let us speak with one of their friends. Tell me, miss, tell me about the-“

“The horror! THE HORROR!” Daisy cried.

“They just popped out of nowhere eating our food, and then they stopped and started eating everything else!” Lily Valley cried.

“Our gardens have been destroyed… again, and for the first time ever, my roof, my fence, my front lights, even my collection of sticks!” Rose cried showing the news anchor a broken stick. “This is horrible!”

“Wow this IS terrible.” Psyche said. “I was recording Sailor Moon before this stupid news alert interrupted. Now I have to wait for the rerun to see what I missed!” The cutaway ends.

Meanwhile, as the five of us try to think of something to argue about, Aqua was getting ready to date my sister. Aqua’s sister Wind Racer was just adjusting his tie a bit. “Is this really necessary, sis?” Aqua asked.

“Bro, if you want to impress this gal, you need to look your best, and this suit will help.” Wind Racer said.

“I look fine in my armor.” Aqua said.

“I know; I mean if we were dating, I would’ve said yes to the armor.” Wind Racer said. Aqua was silent for a moment, a little bit freaked out. “Yeah, forget I said that. That didn’t come out right.”

“So ya think this is the best way to impress Water?” Aqua asked.

“Am I sure? No, I’m not, but it is the best way I can think of, and that’s what counts, right?” Wind Racer asked.

“Sure, I guess.” Aqua said.

“You’ll do fine, bro! You’ll do awesome!” Wind Racer said as he held on to his shoulders. “Look at me, bro. Look me for a sec.”

“Ok.” Aqua said as he looked at her.

“Do I have a pimple on my cheek?” Wind Racer asked.

“No.” Aqua said.

“Ok good.” Wind Racer said as she releases Aqua’s shoulders. “Cause I’m getting ready for a date as well.”

“Oh yeah?” Aqua asked. “Who’s the lucky colt?”

“Oh it’s not a colt.” Wind Racer corrected him.

“Is it… a filly?” Aqua asked.

“Pffft! Don’t be silly, Aqua!” Wind Racer teased him. “I’m not like that!”

“Then… umm… who are ya datin’?” Aqua asked.

“Just follow the instructions you researched and you should do great! I am so proud of you, bro!” Wind Racer said.

“Umm… what?” Aqua asked.

“You have a great date, bro! Let me know how it goes!” Wind Racer instructed him as she pushes him out of the house and shuts the door and locks it, leaving Aqua outside in the dark all alone.

“I think the silliness of Ponyville folk is rubbin’ off on her.” Aqua said to himself. “Well… I guess it’s time for the date, but since this is my first date, I’ll need to use my safety training equipment.” Aqua takes out some safety pads and places them on the cheeks on his face, and then he checks to see if he has his fake credit card. “Actually… ya know what? This safety equipment is really unnecessary. This is Water Gun, Flare’s sister. I’m sure I won’t regret it.” Aqua removes all of his safety equipment and throws them in the trash. “I don’t need safety. I’ll do fine without it.” Aqua said as he hops on his bicycle with training wheels on it. “Who needs safety?” Aqua asked again as he puts on his helmet and then rides off to the streets of Ponyville to meet up with my sister at the Soup ‘n Salads.

8:30 came, and Water was waiting for Aqua outside the Soup 'n' Salads restaurant. She was pretty nervous because she wanted to impress Aqua. "Oh stallion, where is he?" Water asked nervously to herself. "I hope I look good. I don’t think five hours was nearly enough to get ready. I should’ve had myself an earlier start.” She looks over at a blue mare unicorn with a white wavy mane similar to Trixie’s, goes by the name of Dawnray, and my sister asks her, “Hey, do I look good to you?”

“You look great, dear! Love the dress!” Dawnray said to her.

“Thank you! I’m waiting for my date.” Water said.

“Nice! I’m just enjoying the cool night breeze.” Dawnray said.

“Back in Mareami, it was still pretty humid at night. The only times it was cool and breezy out was winter time, and only when a cold-front comes in.” Water said.

“What a shame. I doubt I’d survive in that weather.” Dawnray said as she stuck her tongue out at Water and waved her face around.

“Me neither.” Water said. “What’s the temperature anyway? It’s freezing out here, but at the same time I’m sweating.”

“You must be nervous. Calm yourself. Everything will be fine in your date, dear. I assure you.” Dawnray said.

“Thanks! What’s your name?” Water asked.

“Dawnray, but my friends call me Dawnie.” Dawnray said.

“Nice to meet you, Dawnie! I’m Water!” Water said with her hoof out.

“YOU can call me Dawnray.” Dawnray advised her.

“Oh… ok.” Water said upsettingly as she places her hoof down.

“Sorry. It just seems like a pet name to me.” Dawnray said as she sticks her tongue out at Water again and shakes her face again.

“You like sticking out your tongue, huh?” Water asked.

“My friends and I all do.” Dawnray said. “We call our group – The Group That Always Sticks Their Tongues Out.”

“Really?” Water asked.

“With a little Collin-P in the end, but my friend Fancy Paints uses a lower-case P, while Drift and I use a capital P.” Dawnray said.

“Cool!” Water nodded. “Oh look! Here comes my date now!” Aqua rides his bike over to Water and parks it near a pole and chain-locks the bike on it. “Oh wait, I’m nervous still. I’m still shaking. I didn’t bring flowers or chocolates!”

“Relax, Water. He’s the one that’s supposed to bring flowers and chocolates.” Dawnray corrected her.

“Oh… well then I’m no longer nervous, but I am furious cause I see he didn’t bring me any.” Water complained.

“Hey Water.” Aqua said.

“HEY AQUA!” Water screamed in his ear.

“OW!” Aqua yelled. “That hurt!”

“Sorry. I’m still nervous.” Water said.

“It’s ok, Water. I’m a bit nervous too, but ya should be used to it. Flare said ya have been on many dates.” Aqua said.

“What makes you say that?” Water asked as her hoof is standing on a calendar. “Oh right, this. Since when I was I standing on a calendar?” Because I said so. “So Aqua, anything new?”

“Umm… oh no I forgot the flowers.” Aqua mumbled to himself.

“What was that?” Water asked even though I know perfectly well that she heard him.

“Umm… uhhhh…” Aqua got pretty nervous. I’m pretty sure Aqua isn’t desperate to be in a relationship with Water, but I know she’s broken up with somepony recently and I know for a fact he doesn’t want to upset her, so he used his magic to pull a flower from a bush. Aqua tried as hard as he could but the flower was stuck inside the bush.

“Aqua, are you alright?” Water asked even though I know she knows what’s going- “Ok we get it! Shush!”

As Aqua continued to pull that flower that was stuck on the bush, he ended up pulling the whole bush out of place and the whole bush started levitating towards him. “Here. Flowers for ya, Water.”

“Yippie! Flowers! How wonderful, Aqua! Thank you!” Water said excitedly.

“It was my pleasure.” Aqua said as Water eats up the whole bush in one bite, and then she burps up some leaves, and a ladybug.

“Thanks for the appetizer, Aqua! That will sure save us money.” Water said.

“Of course.” Aqua nodded.

“Soooo… the Soup ‘n Salads, huh? Never been here before.” Water said as she looked at the restaurant.

“I can tell. Ya lookin’ at the Taco Shack building right now.” Aqua corrected her. “Soup ‘n Salads is just across the street.”

“Oh.” Water giggled to herself. “How silly of me!”

“Heh… no worries, mate. Let’s just head over there and have ourselves something good.” Aqua suggested as Water held onto Aqua’s hoof and they both walked across the street.

“Best of luck to you, dear!” Dawnray cried out to Water, waved to her, and then stuck her tongue out.

When the two of them got to the restaurant, they got themselves a round booth near an aquarium, and the two of them looked inside their menus. When the waiter came, they ordered their food and their drinks. “I’m gonna take a Bark Cesar Salad, medium-rare, ranch dressing.” Water said to the waiter.

“I’ll take a Coral-Noodle Soup, no peanuts.” Aqua ordered.

“Yeah actually, I’ll have what he’s having.” Water said to the waiter.

"Why did you change your mind?" Aqua asked her.

"Oh, umm.... when I dated Fonz, he ordered me to get the same thing he's getting.” Water said.

"Ya can get whatever you want. I don't care." Aqua said.

“Oh… well then… I’ll take a Bark Cesar Salad, and-“ Water said to the waiter but the waiter interrupts.

“I haven’t changed your order, ma’am.” The waiter said to her.

“Well then. That saves time!” Water said to the waiter as the waiter walks away.

“Alright. Gotta remember my research. Start it all with small-talk.” Aqua mumbled to himself. “So Water, how was your day?” he asked him.

“Well that’s a boring conversation starter. Here, lemme start up something.” Water suggested.

“Umm… alright. Go on ahead.” Aqua said.

“How was yo day, foo?” Water asked.

“Isn’t that what I asked?” Aqua asked.

“Well yeah, but the way you said it bored me. Don’t worry about it, Aqua. This is your first date. I won’t judge you.” Water said.

“Ok… well my day was fine.” Aqua said.

“Fine? Just fine?” Water asked.

“What do ya want me to say?” Aqua asked.

“Oh nevermind, please continue.” Water insisted.

“Alright… well, I went to work today.” Aqua said.

“Where do you work?” Water asked.

“At Ponyville’s Water Refinery.” Aqua said. “I make sure all the water in Ponyville is fresh and clean, and on certain days I help repair leaky pipes.”

“So you’re a plumber?” Water asked.

“I wouldn’t go far to call myself a plumber.” Aqua said. “I mean, I kinda am, but not really. Since I have a master’s degree, I’m a higher rank than a plumber is. I don’t just fix pipes; I also make sure the water is fresh and clean, and I don’t ever show my butt-crack.”

“Thank goodness for that, huh?” Water asked.

“Thank goodness for that.” Aqua agreed. “So how about ya day?”

"It was great! Your sister is so much fun, Aqua!" Water said.

"Oh really? Ya and Wind Racer seem to get along fine, huh?" Aqua asked.

"You betcha!" Water said.

"So what do ya do for a job?" Aqua asked.

"Oh I don't have a job yet." Water said.

"Oh, I could've sworn that Flare would've hired ya at his shop." Aqua said.

"Well, I did ask, but he said he's pretty full there." Water said.

"What? I could've sworn he'd hire his own sister." Aqua said.

"Well, he did say the only position available was janitor." Water said having a vision of all the mistakes and gross stuff she has to do if she was janitor. "But then I figured that's not the job for me."

"Ya won't have any argument from me. Nopony wants to be janitor." Aqua said as he chuckled.

"I know right?!" Water said said excitedly. "You gotta take my word on it. You know how disgusting it is cleaning bathrooms? Try cleaning Flare's bathroom when he's sick. Blah!"

"When Wind Racer was sick, I had to clean up the bathroom as well. It wasn't an easy task, ya know." Aqua said.

"I hear ya, buddy." Water said.

"Man, our siblings." Water and Aqua said at the same time, and then they both laughed. Uh oh, I can see a connection coming along! Do you ship these two together? I do!

"I should've got to know you earlier, dude. You're really fun!" Water said.

“Thanks, ya two.” Aqua nodded.

“Ya ya ya, what’s with the ‘yas’?” Water asked.

“Ya know… I’m ok with ya teasin’ me about that.” Aqua nodded.

“Well that’s nice. Where's our food?! I'm so hungry right now!" Water complained.

"It'll come, don't worry." Aqua said as he smiled at Water.

“This would be a great chance for the two of us to continue this conversation.” Water said as she stared at Aqua.

“Ok… I did say I’m ok with ya teasing me about my accent but starin’ at me is still uncomfortable.” Aqua said.

“How about this?” Water asked as she blind-folded herself.

“Much better.” Aqua nodded as he sighed. We'll continue with these love birds later.

Meanwhile over at Engie’s basement, the five of us were getting prepared in building ourselves a combination float. Engie’s robot mom comes down and asks us, “Would you kids like some brownies and lemonade?”

“Oh yes please, Miss Robomom.” Psyche said.

“Can I have some nuts with it?” I asked.

“Of course.” Robomom said as she takes a nut shaker out of her metal chest chest (it’s a storage chest on her chest area) and shakes some nuts on some of the brownies. “Here you go, dear.”

“Actually… I wanted nuts in my lemonade.” I corrected her. Robomom did so and I got excited. “Yay! I’m nuts for my lemonade! Is pun intended? Who cares? Nuts in my lemonade!”

“Thanks ma! These are delicious!” Engie said.

“Ah’m glad ya find them delicious, dear. They were made from grandma’s secret recipe.” Robomom said.

“Yee-haw!” Engie cried.

“Wait, Engie, didn’t you build your mom? Which means you’re your own grandparent?” Psyche asked.

“Illogical… illogical…” robomom said as her head explodes.

“Yeah, that’s why ah didn’t correct her, Psyche.” Engie said to him.

“Alright so are we building this float?” Blaze asked.

“And how are we going to argue about it?” I asked.

“Flare, do we have to argue about it? It doesn’t seem necessary.” Psyche said.

“Psyche, bro, this whole situation won’t make sense unless we argue about something. I want to give Princess Luna another letter. I’m close to another free dinner.” I explained.

“So that’s it? All this for a free dinner?” Blaze asked.

“It’s not so much of the dinner, more like seeing Princess Luna. I haven’t seen her since our return from Chaos Mountain, and I haven’t sent her a letter in a while.” I said.

“It’s ok, man. Just send her a letter and say you two should hang out.” Blaze suggested.

“Oh sure, Blaze, it’s that simple!” I said sarcastically. “Hey while I’m at it, why don’t I donate to charity? Why don’t I build a ship in a bottle? Heck, how about I just stop making the Friendship is Epic series? C’MON, BLAZE! Make sense!”

“Well if you want to argue about something. How about the argument you two are having now?” Crystal asked.

“Illogical…” Robomom said again as her body blows up. Her head blew up before, not her torso.

“C’mon, Crystal! What kind of friendship lesson is that? Arguing about arguments? Even I’m not that far-fetched.” I said.

“So how about that float, huh?” Engie asked. “We should quit our procrastinatin’. The parade is tomorrow.”

“Wow, already? Time moves by fast.” Crystal shook her head and said.

“So we want a grape-olive-kumquat-plum… umm… what was yours again, Crystal?” Engie asked.

“Apple, I think, but I think I’m thinking of changing my mind, I think.” Crystal said.

“Nice tongue twister, Crystal.” Blaze said.

“Thanks! Anyways, I’m thinking of changing mine to banana.” Crystal said.

“Banana?” a minion asked.

“Actually no.” Crystal said.

“Awww.” The minion complained.

“Actually…. Coconut!” Crystal said.

“Coconut?” a Jamaican minion asked.

“Seriously?” Crystal asked.

“Ya-mon.” the minion said.

“How about spinach? Is there a minion that likes spinach?” Crystal asked.

“Aye-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay!” Popeye said.

“This will take a while for me to think about.” Crystal said.

“And it’s going to take me a while to think of an argument for us to use.” I said. “I don’t think I can take a group project without some sort of argument and then resolving it. That’s what Equestria is all about.”

“Really? Cause ah thought Equestria was all about giggin’ at unfunny jokes, statin’ the obvious, and apologizin’ and huggin’ each other constantly?” Engie asked.

“Different ponies have different points of view on Equestria, Engie.” Psyche said. “So anypony up for a jelly-baby?”

Meanwhile with Aqua and Water, they were just finishing up their meals. “Ah! That was delicious! Much better soups and salads than what Flare has, forgive me Flare.” Water said.

“I agree. It’s not often I get to go out to dinner with just one other pony. I normally just go out with all of my friends at once.” Aqua said.

“Wait, I thought you said this was your first date?” Water asked.

“I go out to dinner with my sister sometimes, but she prefers eating at home most of the time.” Aqua said.

“Your bill.” The waiter said as he gives Aqua the bill.

“Oh allow me, Aqua. It’s my duty as the marefriend to pay for our expensive meal all by myself.” Water said.

“Huh? Oh no need, Water. I got it.” Aqua insisted.

“No, no, no, no! It’s my job to pay for the meal.” Water said.

“Who told ya that?” Aqua asked.

“Fonz did.” Water said.

“Again with Fonz?” Aqua asked. “I keep tellin’ ya, mate; I am not Fonz.”

“I know you’re not Fonz, but he said the stallion of the relationship is superior in every way, and I agree with him. I’m the fool, Aqua.” Water said.

“No ya not. Stallions are no better than mares. Why would ya agree with that, please pardon my language, that garbage?” Aqua asked.

“I don’t know… every stallionfriend I had is always tough.” Water said.

“Every single one?” Aqua asked.

“Except with for that one wheelchair pony back at home with the volley-ball scar on his face.” Water said. “By the looks of him, he seemed tough.”

“Ya like tough ponies?” Aqua asked.

“I do! They’re rough snugglers and I like that!” Water said.

“Seems weird.” Aqua said.

”It’s who I am, Aqua. I can’t help that.” Water said.

“I won’t judge ya.” Aqua said.

“Shouldn’t you be correcting me and try to improve my attitude?” Water asked.

“No, Water. Ya fine the way ya are.” Aqua said.

“You’re so laid back. Why are you so laid back?” Water asked. “It’s weird.”

“Water, I’m not a tough pony. I’m kind, gentle, and I play the good guys on World of Warcraft.” Aqua said. “In fact I play the good guys on every single game that let’s ya choose. In Star Wars I play the light side, I unlock every single positive emote on Fable, and on Grand Theft Auto I always say sorry every time I crash into another vehicle.”

“You’re like my brother, Aquaman. No wonder you two get along great.” Water said.

“And ya like ya brother too. He calls me Aquaman sometimes.” Aqua said.

“So you’re not a tough guy huh?” Water asked. “C’mon don’t lie! I’m sure there’s toughness in you somewhere.” Aqua takes money out of his wallet and places it all on the bill. “Keep the change.”

“Very good, sir.” The waiter said as he takes the bill.

“So it’s true then. You’re gentle, sensitive, and kind.” Water said.

“If ya don’t like it, it’s fine.” Aqua said. “I’ll just getting going now. That was a good dinner, Water. It was nice getting to know ya.”

“But Aqua, can’t we make this work?” Water asked.

“I’m not the type of pony ya lookin’ for. I’m sorry. I’ll see ya around.” Aqua said as he walks out of the restaurant and begins to head home.

“Aqua wait, come back!” Water yelled as she ran outside to chase him. “Aqua! No he’s already gone! I guess I’ll try again tomorrow then. I’ll see him at the parade.”

“I’m still here though, actually.” Aqua said. “I don’t remember where I put my bike.”

“Didn’t you park it across the street?” Water asked.

“Oh yeah, that’s right.” Aqua remembered. “Thanks. So what did ya want to tell me?”

“D’oh I already made my decision to just talk to you tomorrow. It’s too much effort to change my mind. See you at the parade.” Water said as she walks off.

“And I didn’t even need the safety for this date.” Aqua said as he puts back on his bike helmet.

Meanwhile back at Engie’s basement, we continued to build the float, but we weren’t even a quarter of the way done and some of us were getting tired. “Ugh! Are we almost done? I don’t think we’re gonna get this done on time!” I complained.

“It’s only 9 PM, Flare. We have plenty of time.” Engie said.

“Plenty of time? Where’s sleep?” I asked.

“We can pull this all-nighter, no problem!” Engie said.

“No we can’t.” I argued with him.

“Yeah we can.” Engie argued with me.

“No we can’t.”

“Yeah… we can.”

“No we- nope, still not a good enough argument.” I said.
“C’mon we can do this, guys.” Blaze said. “I mean look, we got the wheels and steering wheel done. Isn’t that something?”

“Once Psyche comes back with our coffee we’ll have no problems with this all-nighter!” Crystal said.

“Uhh, Crystal? I’ve been back, and you finished your coffee 10 minutes ago.” Psyche corrected her.

“Oh… well that’s the power of caffeine, baby.” Crystal said.

“I don’t drink coffee though. That’s why I asked Psyche for a hot chocolate.” Blaze said.

“And you didn’t drink it yet.” Psyche said.

“I’m waiting for it to cool down.” Blaze said.

“Yep, hot chocolate: the beverage no one drinks until it cools down.” I said.

“Alright, partners. Ah’ll need a 4x6 socket wrench to make some adjustments to the lever pulleys. Can somepony pass me one?” Engie asked.

“On it.” Crystal said as she walks over to Engie’s tool box to look for the socket wrench. “But one question though.”

“Yeah the socket wrench is the one with the twisty circle top, Crystal.” Engie said.

“That’s not what I was going to ask, I’m not stupid, I know what a socket wrench looks like.” Crystal said. “I was going to ask which one is the 4x6 one?”

“Here, just take them out one at a time, show them to me, and ah’ll tell you.” Engie said.

“Ok.” Crystal said as she takes out one of the socket wrenches.

“That’s a 6x8 socket wrench.” Engie said.

“Ok, how about this one?” Crystal asked as she shows him another one.

“That’s a 3x9 socket wrench.” Engie said.

“This one?” Crystal asked with another one.

“Close. That’s a 4x6 pipe wrench.” Engie said.

“Can’t you just use this?” Crystal asked.

“No we have to do it by the book.” Engie said.

“What book, Engie?” Blaze asked.

“This book, Blaze.” Engie said as he points to his head.

“Hmm…” I thought to myself as I was reading Engie’s head right after I removed his helmet. “Yeah this must be some sort of foreign alien language because I can’t read it.”

“That’s just the spots on mah shaved head, Flare.” Engie corrected me.

“I thought you were bald?” Blaze asked.

“Ah was but ah started growin’ back a bit. Since the cool weather isn’t too far away ah decided to let it grow a bit.” Engie said.

“How about this one, Engie?” Crystal asked with another tool.

“That’s a 7x8 cake wrench.” Engie said.

“A cake wrench?” Blaze asked.

“Sometimes ah have to make sure if ah bake a cake, ah have to make sure it’s twisted on correctly.” Engie said.

“How about this one, Engie?” Crystal asked with another tool.

“That’s a mallet.” Engie pointed.

“Oh sorry, that’s mine.” Gallagher said as he takes the mallet and runs off.

“Yeah this is going to take a while.” Psyche said.

“No it’s not.” I argued with him.

“Flare, quit it with trying to argue. It’s not going to work.” Psyche said.

“C’mon Psyche! The two of us are always going at each other!” I said.

“AAAAAH! My melons!” a pony yelled from outside.

“WOOOOO!” Gallagher yelled from outside.

Meanwhile back at my trailer, Water was getting ready for bed and as she climbs into bed she starts talking to herself. No I will not call her crazy because I talk to myself too. In fact, I’m pretty much talking to myself half the time I make the story. “I don’t understand. Is toughness really what I want in a coltfriend? It doesn’t make much sense. I like Aqua! I really do! Perhaps I need to make a different approach.”

A cutaway shows Aqua sitting on a park bench and Water walks over to him while pushing a heavy box. She wipes her sweat and said to him, “Phew! Hey Aqua! Want to stare at me as I carry this heavy box?”

“Huh?” Aqua asked.

Water walks over to the side of the box with her back facing him. “Look out Aqua! I’m about to pick up this heavy box. Watch my back.” Just then, Water crouches towards the ground and tries to pick up. What? You think she was going to bend-over as she tries to pick up that heavy box? C’mon, she’s smarter than that! You have to crouch while trying to pick up something, not bend-over. “Aqua can you help me out please?”

“Um, sure.” Aqua said as he uses his magic to easily pick up the box.

“Oh… right… I forgot about that.” Water said. The cutaway ends.

“Or maybe it’s the way I’m dressed.” Water thought. “Maybe I should dress into something that shows a little more skin.”

A cutaway shows Aqua sitting on the same park bench, and Water walks up to him and says, “Hey, Aqua! How do I look?”

Aqua looks at her pretty surprised. “Wow… ya look… I never expected that.”

“You like it? I got his sumar wrestler outfit from Party City.” Water said as she was wearing an inflatable beige sumar wrestler costume. The cutaway ends.

“Or perhaps I need to take a different approach WHILE showing more skin.” Water said.

A cutaway shows Water with the sumar wrestler outfit and carrying a heavy box towards Aqua. “Don’t mind me, Aqua. I’m just about to pick-up this heavy box.” Water said, but this time she does bend over while wearing the costume.

“Ugh!” Aqua said in a disgusted tone while covering his eyes. The cutaway ends.

“I don’t know. There has to be a way to impress Aqua. I never not had a coltfriend for this long before. What was that word again that means you’re not in a relationship?” Water asked herself. “Oh right, alone! Well it’s not going to be that way for long. I’m really going to wow him tomorrow, and I’ll show him that I can handle a gentle-colt.”

“Good luck with that.” A voice said from the other side of the room.

“Huh? Who’s there?” Water asked.

“I’m a thief that broke into your trailer and is stealing all of your stuff.” The pony said. “Didn’t your brother remind you not to leave the door unlocked? Shame on you, missy!”

“I got so much on my mind! I can only do so much at a time!” Water complained.

“Well regardless, I hope things go well with you and Aqua.” The thief said.

“Hey thanks! When you finally get arrested, I’ll be sure to come and visit.” Water said.

“Hey thanks!” the thief said happily as he takes some of Water’s stuff, stuffs them in his sack, and runs off.

After a while went by, back at Engie’s basement, Crystal was still looking for the socket wrench Engie was looking for in his toolbox. “Is it this one?” Crystal asked.

“No that’s a 3x9 socket wrench.” Engie said.

“How about this one?” Crystal asked.

“That’s a 2x4 socket wrench.” Engie said.

“How… about… this one?” Crystal asked as she struggles to hold a humongous socket wrench,

“That’s a 300x500 socket wrench.” Engie said.

“How about this one?” Crystal asked as she wasn’t holding anything on her hoof.

“That’s a 0x0 socket wrench.” Engie said.

“Engie can’t you just whack the parade float with the wrench you always use like when you build dispensers and sentries?” Blaze suggested.

“I can, but where’s the fun in building something when we could just work together to build something?” Engie asked. “Ya can’t rush perfection.”

“Wow, Engie, that is a very important lesson to learn. Very good! That could be our friendship lesson this week!” I said impressively. “But we’re not gonna use it because I still want to do the argument lesson.”

“Wait a second, Engie. You mean all this time you could just whack the parade float and it’s done?” Psyche asked.

“Well… yeah.” Engie said.

“You do realize we would’ve been done and home already by now right?” Psyche asked.

“Think of it how you like, Psyche. Ah’ve enjoyed the time we all had together.” Engie said.

“Well this is great then!” Blaze said excitedly. “Go ahead, Engie. Build up the float and we can all head home and get some sleep for the big day.”

“Well, two things Blaze. One: ah just finished it. How does it look?” Engie asked as he just finished building the olive-kumquat-plum-grape-banana float.

“Nice!” Blaze nodded.

“Very impressive, Engie!” Psyche said.

“But wait what are the bananas? They weren’t my final decision.” Crystal said.

“Ah decided it for you.” Engie said.

“Whatever.” Crystal said. “As long as minions don’t attack the float we should be fine.”

“And what was that other thing you were going to say, Engie?” Blaze asked.

“There was a second thing?” Engie asked.

“Yeah, you said two things, and one you already build the float, what was the other one?” Blaze asked.

“Oh right! It’s already day-time so we have to go to the parade, not sleep.” Engie said.

“But we weren’t even up all night building this!” Crystal complained.

“No but we were up all night trying to find that stupid socket wrench.” Psyche said.

“Ah still wonder where it- OH! There it is! It was underneath the float the whole time!” Engie said as he picks up the wrench from under the float. “Ah was usin’ it for the wheels and must’ve left it down there.

“UGH!” Blaze groaned and facehooved himself. “Let’s just go to the parade already!”

Meanwhile at Aqua's house, Aqua was walking down to his kitchen to make some breakfast, so he sits down at his table and starts eating the pancakes that were in front of him. But wait, how did those pancakes get there? Aqua was staring at the pancakes and how they got there because he didn't make them.
"Windy? Is this my breakfast on the table?" Aqua yelled from across the house.

"I don't know what you’re talking about, bro! The table was empty last I checked." Wind responded from the Living Room.

"Hmm." Aqua was really concerned about how the food got there, when suddenly, Water walked into the kitchen carrying Aqua's laundry.
"Morning Aqua!" Water said.

"Mornin Water." Aqua said as he was eating his pancakes, but then Aqua became surprised and spit out his food. He then drank his coffee and spit that out too because it was more effective than spitting out food. "Water? What are ya doing here this early?"

"I came to make you breakfast and do your chores." Water said.

"Why? I mean, it's nice of ya to do this, but why?" Aqua asked.

"Well, that's what marefriends do to the coltfriend's, right? Right, Aqua? Right?" Water asked.

"Oh, we're in a relationship now?" Aqua asked.

"Aren't we?" Water asked.

Aqua was confused. "I thought I wasn’t ya type?”

“I thought so too, but I was really desperate and did not want to be alone anymore, so I decided to come over and give you another chance! I don’t care if you’re gentle or rough, Aqua. Just being with you is all I need!” Water explained as she gives Aqua a hug.
.
"Umm…” Aqua said to himself. “Ya may not know it, but I’m not much of a hugger.”

“Oh sorry.” Water said as she releases Aqua from her grasp. “Anything for my Aquey-Walky!” Aqua felt a little uncomfortable after she said that to him and he just decided to return to his breakfast.

“Like the pancakes I made?” Water asked.

“Yeah they’re delicious.” Aqua said.

“Good! I made them with love!” Water said as she boops him in the nose.

“So I see.” Aqua said awkwardly. Water just giggled at him and Aqua wasn’t liking it that much. “Umm, Water, h-how about we head over to the parade and see Flare and the others with the new float?”

”Good idea, baby! Whatever you want, I’ll always be there!” Water said.

“Ok then.” Aqua said awkwardly. “Let’s… ummm… l-let’s h-head over there.”

“Great! Want a doggy-bag so you can take the pancakes home as leftovers?” Water asked.

“We are at my house, mate.” Aqua corrected her.

”Well that saves paper!” Water said as she giggled. “Let’s go!”

”Hey bro, don’t forget, if any of the parade floats start throwing candy, be sure to give me some!” Wind Racer yelled out from the living room.

“I’ll give ya all my peanut ones!” Aqua called back.

“Save the 3-Muskateers for me. I love those.” Water said.

A little while later over at the streets of Ponyville, everypony was setting up for the Summer Harvest Parade. After we signed up, we were just refueling the float or and oiling ourselves up for the parade. Umm, I mean, the other way around. “That polka music playing in the background,” I said upsettingly to myself, “it reminds me of my accordion.”

“Don’t worry, man. You’ll get a new one soon.” Blaze said as he comforted me.

“For polka’s sake, I hope you’re right.” I said.

“Hey! This the same song I used when I helped fend off the parasprites!” Pinkie said excitedly.

“Hey there you are, Pinkie! Weren’t you right next to us a little while ago after I smelled something good but you stole the scent from me?” Spike asked her.

“No, I don’t remember being there.” Pinkie said.

“Oh crud… Twilight, we have a clone survivor!” Spike called out to Twilight annoyingly.

“Last year, everypony would’ve thought it was a changeling, but after the mirror pool crisis that theory’s changed.” I said to my fiends.

Meanwhile over at the crowd, Water and Aqua headed over to their spots where they will be watching the parade. “I bought some seats so we don’t have to stand the whole time.” Water said.

“Good call, Water.” Aqua said.

“Thanks, hun!” Water said as she sets up the chairs. Aqua sighs after she said that. “There we go! I got ourselves matching seats!”

“Umm… ok.” Aqua said awkwardly as he sits down on one of the seats, and then Water heads over and sits on his lap. “Hey!”

“Hi horse!” Water said excitedly to Aqua.

“Why are ya sittin’ on my lap? What’s wrong with ya seat?” Aqua asked.

“Oh that seat? That’s just where I’m putting my drink.” Water said as she places her drink on the spare seat she bought. “Don’t marefriends sit on their coltfriend’s laps and pretend they’re Santa?”

“I-I didn’t see that in m-my research.” Aqua said.

”Where did you research anyway?” Water asked.

“I went on YaTube and watched some videos.” Aqua said.

Water started laughing. “I always think you’re teasing me with that accent.” Aqua didn’t say anything and just sat there.

As the five of us were setting the float, we took a sneak peek at our competition. “Why is Doctor Whooves wearing a pear outfit?” Blaze asked.

“Isn’t this the type of parade to wear costumes? Maybe we should’ve made some.” Crystal said.

“I know but the Doctor hates pears. Maybe when he changed incarnations he preformed a love for it.” Blaze said.

“Nope. I still hate pears, my good chap.” The Doctor said. “I just wear this to show how much I hate it.”

“Ok then.” Blaze said.

“That makes no sense to me. Why advertise something you hate to show how much you hate it? Doesn’t anyone have anything better to do with their lives than waste them showing how much they hate something?” I asked.

“You wanna see somethin’ else that’s confusin’? Ah see Amethyst Star many times in the audience, and ah see her again in that tomato float.” Engie pointed out. “Ah swear, that mirror pond.”

“Or changeling.” I added.

“Or just an error.” Psyche said.

“Oh shut up, Psyche! Make sense!” I advised him.

“Eh, sometimes I see a replica of myself too, but I just ignore it and move on.” The Doctor said.

“Are you cheatin’ on Derpy for Cloud Kicker, Doctor?” Engie asked him. “Cause ah saw you at the movies with Cloud Kicker. Got something to confess?”

Back with Aqua and Water, they were seeing on who they could find at the parade. "I don't see Flare and the others." Water said.

"I see the Crusaders with a golden apple float." Aqua pointed out.

"Oh I see them too." Water said.

"Ya really do, or ya just agreein with me cause ya think we’re a couple?" Aqua asked.

"Both." Water said.

"I also see Amethyst Star with a tamato float." Aqua pointed out. “And I see her here too.”

"You say tomato weird." Water said with a chuckle, but then she covered her mouth in fright . "Oh I'm sorry! I didn't mean to say that! Please don't hit me!"

“I-I'm not gonna hit ya, Water." Aqua said giving himself a facehoof. "Ya gotta stop with that.”

"Sorry, sorry." Water said.

Aqua peeks over and finally sees our float. “What in the living… what?”

"What happened?" Water asked.

"There’s Flare and the others with that… what is this? Is that supposed to be a fruit of a veggie?” Aqua asked.

"I have no idea." Water said. "Wanna go see them?"

"I'll see them after the parade. Ya can go ahead." Aqua insisted.

"No, no. I'd rather stay here. It makes you happy." Water insisted.

"Umm, I have to go to the restroom." Aqua said. “Unless ya gonna say ya wanna join me?”

"No, ew! That’s disgusting, dude!” Water said. “But I’ll come with you and wait outside the door! I can do that!”

"Uhhh, no thank you. Ya stay here and protect our spot." Aqua suggested.

"Are you sure? You think I'll behave myself?" Water asked.

"I know for sure." Aqua said as he trotted off. Water looked around, and then she started tip-hooving over to our float to see what we were up to. The five of us were all inside of our float getting it ready.

"Ah, this looks like a fantastic float! I love it!" Crystal said excitedly.

"Yeah, I gotta say, we did good.” Blaze said. “So I’ll say it now: we did it go.”

"Eeyup." Engie said.

"Hey bro, hey guys!" Water said trotting over to us and hops inside the float with us.

“Who’s the bro and who’s the guys?” Crystal asked.

"Hey Water! How are things with Aqua?" I asked.

"It's going great, Flarey!" Water said excitedly. "I think he's a keeper."

"Really? I knew there was something off about him.” I said.

"It’s awesome possum, isn’t it?” Water asked

"Yes, of course! But I don't want to say that all the time, that's what everypony expects." I said.

"This float is gonna rock everypony's socks off, Water!" Crystal said.

"What kind of float is that anyway?" Water asked.

"It's a plum-kumquat-olive-banana-grape float." Psyche said. "You see, Water, we couldn't agree on what theme float we'd do, so we decided to put all of our ideas in one."

"And we'll win the contest for sure!" Crystal said excitedly.

"Wait, this was a contest?" Blaze asked.

"Duh, it's a contest! Where have y’all been in the past few days, Blaze?" Engie asked.

"Nopony told me it was a contest." Blaze said.

"OF COURSE IT'S A CONTEST, BLAZE!" Pinkie yelled in his face and started hoping towards her float.

"Ow! Say that louder why don't ya?" Blaze complained while holding his ears.

"OF COURSE IT'S A CONTEST, BLAZE!" Pinkie yelled in a megaphone at his face. Blaze started shaking and heard nothing but ringing in his ears. His ear drums just bursted out. Seriously, there were drums in his ears. Why? Cartoon logic.

"Wow, you alright, sugarcube?” AppleJack asked Blaze from outside of our float.

"What?" Blaze asked.

"Ah said, you alright, Blaze!?" AppleJack said a little louder.

"What was that?!" Blaze asked.

"Pinkie's megaphone might've been too loud, and it might've made him deaf." Psyche said to her.

"Oh." AppleJack said.

“It’s only temporarily though, I assure you that.” Psyche said.

AppleJack then looked over at our float in confusion. "What in tarnation is this? Ah know food and that there don't look like any food ah seen."

"Oh we didn't know which theme float to use so we combined our food ideas.” I said.

“Ah can see that, and ah’ll be honest, this isn’t the weirdest thing ah’ve ever seen.” AppleJack said.

A cutaway shows Gabe Newell reading his emails. He looks at one of the emails and the emails reads ‘ur fat lol’. Gabe then picks up a phone, dials, and then said on the phone, “Hello? Is this Hasbro? Yeah, this is Gabe Newell. Delay MLP season 3.” The cutaway ends.

“So you in the parade, AJ?” Crystal asked.

"No, but Apple Bloom at her friends are. Well, actually they were, but they given their float to my and Apple Bloom's cousin, Babs Seed." AppleJack explained.

"Oh, cool! Which one is their float? I bet it's the squash one!" I guessed.

"Flare, you obviously don't know the apple family." Psyche said.

"Of course I do, I known them longer than you have!" I reminded him.

"See that golden apple leading the parade?" Psyche asked me pointing to it.

"Yeah, I bet it's pretty expensive." I said.

"They're riding that." Psyche said.

"How is that possible? The Apple family ain't that rich." I said. “Now if Expensive Headpiece or Colorless Tableware were riding it, then it would make sense.”

“They used golden glitter.” AppleJack said.

"You know what would be really cool? If we put that golden glitter on chocolate ice cream!" Crystal suggested.

"Why?" Psyche asked.

"Because then it would be rich!" Crystal teased and laughed. We all laughed along, except for Blaze.

"What?" Blaze asked. "What, why are we all laughing?"

“Well ah gotta get goin’ to see the parade. Good luck to y’all!” AppleJack said as she walks away and passes Aqua while she was at it. “Howdy Aqua!”

"Hey AppleJack. Oh there you are, Water!" Aqua said as he hops inside our float.

"AQUA! Oh I'm so sorry! Please don’t be mad! I should’ve stayed there, I’m sorry!” Water begged.

"Oh sweet Celestia, Water." Aqua said with an irritated tone and a facehoof. "Water, I'm sorry, but I've been thinking."

"You were thinking? That's a first." Crystal teased.

"You were thinking of what?” Water asked.

“Umm… are ya sure ya ready for a relationship? Because this might be a bit much.” Aqua asked.

“What’s wrong with you, Aqua? I kept saying I’m ready.” Water said.

“I think this is the first time I asked.” He corrected her.

“Well regardless, do you not think I’m ready?” Water asked.

“I… umm… I don’t know. What do I say?” Aqua asked.

“I have no idea what all of you are talking about cause all I hear is ‘bllllling’.” Blaze said.

“BLAZE!” Engie yelled at him. “AQUA WANTS TO BREAK UP WITH WATER AND TRY WITHOUT BREAKING HER HEART!”

“Wait, WHAT?!” Water yelled.

“Shut up, Engie. No he doesn’t!” I corrected him angrily.

“Actually, Flare…” Aqua said.

“You want to break up with me?!” Water yelled at Aqua.

“It’s not like that, Water. Nothin’ personal.” Aqua tried to calm her down.

“Don’t lie, Aqua, it is personal.” Engie corrected him.

“Engie, SHUT UP!” I yelled at him.

“Yeah, Engie!” Crystal agreed. “Yay! I’m part of the conversation!”

“What? I can’t hear a thing!” Blaze yelled.

“You really want to break-up with me, Aqua, and you don’t even have the guts to tell me yourself? What’s wrong with you?” Water asked.

“Flare said ya were sensitive and I didn’t want to hurt ya.” Aqua explained.

“Yeah and look where that’s gotten you.” Engie teased.

“Engie, you’re REALLY trying my patience!” I yelled at him.

“Why are you mad at me? Aqua wants to break up with water.” Engie asked.

“No I don’t! I mean… yeah, but…” Aqua stuttered.

“So you can’t just tell me yourself?!” Water yelled at him.

“Ok everypony SHUT UP!” Psyche yelled. “I’m tired of this arguing!”

“Arguing? Wait… yes! We’re arguing!” I cheered. “Yes! A new friendship lesson! This is exactly what I wanted!”

“Well this is probably a bad time because the float is moving.” Psyche pointed out.

”Psyche c’mon, stay on topic.” Crystal suggested.

”I’m serious, look.” Psyche pointed. So we all looked outside and saw that our float was moving on the parade.

“Wait what are you all looking at?” Blaze asked as he looks over later than all of us. “Oh, the parade started! Hi everypony! Check out a big awesome fruit basket!”

“And veggie, there’s one veggie.” I reminded him.

“Aqua, why?” Water asked.

“Ya mad at me because I don’t have the courage to break ya heart?” Aqua asked.

”If you don’t want me? Why not just say so?” Water asked.

“Flare said ya sensitive. Ya just went through a major break-up and I don’t want ya to feel upset.” Aqua said.

“Well you darn right made me upset! This has been a major problem in my past! Nopony ever points out my errors and are, how you say, ‘too nice’ to tell me the truth. I just get ignored for that, and I hate that! That’s why I loved Fonz! He points out my errors! He was harsh yes, but at least he was honest!”

“He WAS NOT honest! He used you to get to Flare.” Engie reminded her.

“Besides that!” Water yelled.

“Wow so many Bon Bons, Amethyst Stars, Caramels, Raindrops, Carrot Tops, and Cherry Berries out there. How is that possible?” Blaze asked.

“Why couldn’t you just tell me, Aqua? It would’ve been so much easier!” Water yelled.

“I’m sorry, Water. Being rough isn’t my thing! Quit trying to push me, mate!” Aqua yelled.

“How do I even know all of YOU are not hiding anything from me?!” Water asked all of us.

“Hey whoa, ah barely know ya.” Engie said.

“Neither do I. Other than you overreacting, I have no other opinion about you!” Psyche yelled.

“This arguing is so much fun!” I said excitedly.

“Flare! Shush! Why are you not helping out your sister or any of your friends? All you care about is those stupid arguments!” Psyche yelled.

“It’s not for me, it’s for Luna!” I yelled.

“AAAAAH! Why can’t I think of anything to argue about?!” Crystal yelled.

"Hey what's with all the racket over there?" Blaze asked looking at Pinkie's float and the Crusader float hitting eachother. “Wow. Bumper cars it’s like.”

“Ok Water, I’m sorry, alright?” Aqua said.

“How about actually proving to me that you’re tough? C’mon, Aqua! Prove it!” Water yelled as she begins to shove him.

“Water, please?” Aqua asked.

“DO IT!” Water yelled as he pushes him again.

"Hey get outta the way ya crazy drivers!" Blaze yelled at the other floats. “Oooo, Pinkie’s float just crashed into the grass.”

“C’mon PROVE IT!” Water yelled as she pushes Aqua so hard that he knocks into Blaze and it makes Blaze hit his head on the steering wheel and passes out.

“Water are ya doin’ this? This is unnessarry!” Aqua yelled.

“Prove your toughness! Break up with me!” Water yelled.

“OK! We’re done, Water! I cannot stand ya! Ya happy now?!” Aqua yelled.

“VERY! See? Was that so hard?” Water asked angrily.

“It was very hard! I will not be tough for anypony! Even if I care for them dear! My kindness makes me who I am! I’m sorry that I didn’t have the courage to break up with ya! That’s because I was only trying to spare ya FEELINGS!” Aqua yelled.

“Well it worked!” Water yelled.

“Ok! I cannot stand the arguing anymore! I’m getting flashbacks!” I yelled.

“Then why did you keep asking for arguments?!” Psyche yelled.

“I just wanted to learn a new friendship lesson! I haven’t written to Luna in a while and I haven’t seen her in ages and I just miss her so much, man- why is Blaze laying on the ground?” I asked as I just noticed that Blaze is passed out on the floor.

“Flare if you want to talk to Luna, just write to her. She doesn’t need a friendship lesson, bro.” Psyche said.

“Oh… I knew that.” I lied. “Ok so all that leaves is Engie.” I turned over to Engie said to him, “You’re a jerk.”

“Truth hurts, mah friend.” Engie said.

“Well then don’t say the truth all the time!” I advised him.

“Yes the truth hurts sometimes, I know that, but sometimes it is really nessarry to just say them and get it off ya chest, for the sake of ya friends. I’m sure there will always be a way of understanding.” Aqua said.

“You’re right, Aqua. I’m sorry for pushing you. I just don’t want to be alone. Losing Fonz made a major impact in my life, and being in a relationship with you, I guess I just miss him.” Water explained.

“It’s alright, Water. When ya ready for a relationship, ya will know it, but for now, have a little time to yaself and think. Ya free Water. Fonz is no longer in control of ya life. Live a little without a coltfriend. Ya might think it’s actually more fun than ya know.” Aqua explained.

“You’re right, Aqua. I will do it.” Water understood and smiled at him. Aqua smiles back at her, and then Water gives Aqua a big hug, which still made Aqua feel uncomfortable.

“Yeah, I’m still not a hugger.” Aqua said.

“C’mon, Aqua. Just this once.” I whispered.

“Well…. Umm….. alright.” Aqua said as he hugged Water back which really made Water excited. She started jumping up and down as she was hugging him. “Ok, ok, too much; too much!” Aqua said.

“Right, right, sorry.” Water said as she releases Aqua quickly.

“Hey who’s watching the wheel?” Psyche asked. After our argument was finally over, we looked out the window and saw that our float was getting close to the nearby cliff.

“Oh snap!” Crystal yelled as she quickly hops over to the steering wheel and quickly turns it all the way at the same time pressing down on the breaks, including the hand-breaks.

“NO! I’m too attractive to die!” Psyche cried.

The crowd that leaned over the cliff to check out the wreckage down below all jumped out of the way. Down below was a wreckage of the Cutie Mark Crusaders’ apple float, and while AppleJack and Babs Seed were helping the crusaders out in getting out of the wreckage, they looked up and saw our float leaning over to the cliff-age. They all gasped in fright, but luckily for them, Crystal was able to stop the float just in time, and here we stand, safe and sound leaning on a cliff-edge. “Phew! The float is okay!” Engie said in relief.

“Banana?” a minion that popped out nowhere said, and then suddenly, all of the minion’s friends began attacking our float, yelling ‘banana’, and started taking everything, leaving the seven of us sitting on the grass near the cliff edge, and the only thing left from the float was the steering wheel that Crystal was holding.

“Meh.” Engie shrugged.

“Huh? What did I miss?” Blaze asked as he woke up.

Later that afternoon, I delivered a pizza over to Sweet Apple Acres with my friends, and as we hung out there for a while, we met Apple Bloom’s cousin Babs.

"So, ya run a pizza parlor, huh?" Babs asked me.

"Affirmative!" I said.

"That's pretty sick, I've been waiting for somepony to open up one 'round here." Babs said.

"So you visited here to get away from bullies back home in Manehatten?" I asked.

"Yeah, 'cause I'm a blank flank. Couldn't take that garbage anymore, man!" Babs said.

"Hey, you and I are alike, you know that? I moved to Ponyville to get away from bullies back in Mareami. I couldn't take the heat." I said.

"Heh, I guess so." Babs chuckled.

"Hey, I was wondering. What's does a bab seed have to do with an apple?" Crystal asked her.

“I think I got it from my mom’s side. I’m more of an Orange than an Apple.” Babs said.

“So Aqua, are ya still gonna date Flare’s sister some day?” Engie asked.

“Maybe someday, mate, but for now I’ll just stick by myself for the time being.” Aqua said.

“What did you say the joke yet? Do we do our post-chapter group laugh now?” Blaze asked as he suddenly starts laughing. The rest of us just awkwardly looked at each other.

“Relax, he’ll hear again.” Engie said. Just then, my phone starts to ring. It was an unknown caller, and normally I don’t respond to those calls, but I’m in a good mood so I allowed it.

“Yo!” I said as I answered the phone. “Yes, this is Flare Gun. Uh huh. Yeah? Wait, what? You have my stuff? My trailer was broken into? Really? You caught the thief, huh? Ok good. Yeah I’ll go pick up my stolen possessions, thank you. Bye.” I ended the call there. “You see, Aqua, that is why I put my name on all of my stuff. When they get lost and then found I can retrieve them.”

“Got it.” Aqua said.

”Now I have to call my no-good stubborn sister for not locking the door last night.” I said angrily as I dialed Water’s cell phone number and called her.

“Hello?” Water asked.

“Water, what the hay is your problem?! I keep telling you to the lock the door! But do you ever listen?! NOOOOO!” I yelled.

”I’m sorry, bro. I really am, but can this wait? I’m visiting a friend in jail.” Water said.

“Thank you, Water Gun!” the thief that stole my stuff that is now in jail said happily to Water as he places his hoof against the glass. Water places her hoof against the glass at the same spot as the thief’s but from the other side. Great, now my sister is dating a criminal! Oh well, whatever. I’m done here. I’m gonna go get myself a taco salad.

Author's Note:

In this chapter, it mainly started off as just a chapter about building a float, and the Noble Five that are building it actually have an argument the whole time, but that idea was changed because it was something that alot of stories do, so I made that about Flare WANTING an argument instead.

Now the Aqua-Water scenario was added in to make the chapter bigger the first time, but this time their scenario is the main story of this chapter. Aqua was a little more OOC last time I made this so I made sure both Water and Aqua are actually more IC. Plus in the original version of this chapter Aqua was stuck on gum and Water had to save him from the Noble Five's float after they were arguing in there, but that was stupid, and not funny stupid, so I made it how you see it now, which is actually good enough!

Comments

[FlareGun45]

Alright I guess I can't explain it here. Alright who knows good animation, and who can voice well? I'm turning this into a series on youtube, maybe you'll like that.

[Mr Pones]

"Friendship is Epic" "new epicness, new LULZ!" "And yes, this isn't really the type of story for those without a unique sense of humor, or those who say tl;dr."

Also, goddamn all these epic may-may references...
1.bp.blogspot.com/-bME7xtUC2Xw/TyGFrwR5CvI/AAAAAAAAAoI/WJCShh4uTOw/s1600/thumbs_what_the_fuck_am_a_reading.png

This is just..... well...

"Alright I guess I can't explain it here. Alright who knows good animation, and who can voice well? I'm turning this into a series on youtube, maybe you'll like that."

Please no.

I don't really have much else to say to you besides i.imgur.com/3wgWL.jpg

[Mr Pones]

static4.fjcdn.com/comments/3714842+_6c6152e4e60ead1880b57a0c2c9c170d.jpg

[Tuuc]

I've been slowly snarking my way through the second book, currently I am in chapter six. I was just asked if I think you have improved at all as a writer during the time this fic has taken.

The answer is no. I wish I could say "yes", but... Just no. I still have something like three hundred thousand words and over six months of this fic to go, but at the time you posted this chapter I am currently reading, you had already written over a quarter-million words of the fic in over half a year - that should be more than enough room for improvement.

Yet in this chapter and other recent chapters, you still make the same typos as in the beginning of the fic ("angerly" and "bolcany" come into mind); your vocabulary and sentence structures are still just as limited and your grasp of grammar just as abysmal as they were at first; and most insultingly, you have made no effort to improve your original characters nor your characterization of canon ponies despite repeated comments regarding those points.

All this is a harsh slap in the faces of all the readers, illustrating just how little you care about them and how your only goal is to write this self-insertion mess for your own purposes, whatever they might be.