"Trixie had already begun scrambling down from the tree at Twilight’s appearance, earning more than a few scrapes and fraying her cape and hat more than a little. She paid the damage no mind as she dashed up to Twilight. “Where?” she demanded."
I'm nearly certain those each Twilight should be Lyra.
Was so looking forward to seeing this story continue. Thank you for releasing it to us.
But, uh, small thing:
“Trixie!” The mint green unicorn exclaimed as she came running, Bon Bon in tow and horn glowing gold to provide light. Trixie didn’t question how the two had found her - (...)
Trixie had already begun scrambling down from the tree at Twilight’s appearance, earning more than a few scrapes and fraying her cape and hat more than a little. She paid the damage no mind as she dashed up to Twilight. “Where?” she demanded.
“Come on,” Bon Bon responded, turning and galloping off, Lyra and Trixie in tow.
I'm not sure Twilight belongs there. It seemed like it was supposed to be just Lyra and Bon Bon.
aww that was sweet, I loved he use of Luna in this chapter, and bringing in everyone else and hiding them behind the rock was great. Interesting stuff with Trixie and Raindrops, part of me kinda wanted it to go on for longer, but everything that needed to be said was said and it was overall an excellently done scene, good details with Trixie actually puling some feathers out as well, good scene building, I hope we get to see there date!
Okay, Trixie bossing around a very confused Luna just MADE this chapter in the comedy department. It was also heartwarming how her concern for Raindrops completely overrode the terror of an annoyed Princess that she would normally have.
Even without the non-canon romantic angle here, I've always liked the post-Tales of Ponyville relationship between Trixie and Raindrops. Maybe it's true and maybe not, but I always felt like after that point, Raindrops became Trixie's best friend, and the one she relies and depends on the most. Particularly when it comes to trusting someone to help keep herself from going over the line. That really helps the ship feel legitimate for this story.
The way Trixie gives her whole effort to finding Raindrops and making things right is lovely. She's come a long way since she first moved to Ponyville.
I feel really bad for Raindrops - no wonder she felt so guilty and rushed off like that. Sadly, I think she's right - if she invited Trixie out into the woods in the hope that something would happen, then she was taking advantage of Trixie. It turned out alright in the end, but it was still the wrong thing to do. Trixie forgave her, though, so that's the important thing. I have to say, it was brave of you to write Raindrops that way - she really is far from perfect, and not only in her anger issues.
It's very considerate of Twilight to put off her insane plan because Trixie is having trouble with her heat. It's a good sign that she isn't really a bad pony at heart, she simply hasn't thought all the way through the consequences of her actions.
Not too bad. Very... cathartic to see Luna bossed around. She more than deserves it after the way she treated Trixie like she did. Ugh, I hate working my way through backlog!
Course we don't! We are just poor earth pony apple farmers. We don't have any of this fancy magical city-folk technology. Heck! We don't even have indoor plumbing! Eenope You don't say?? How can you stand to be so DIRTY?! *faints* wait Water from the pond is used to water the apple trees -which bear fruit -which is used to make Cider... -and I love apple cider -which was made from lake water that Trixie was just in... *meanwhile 1000's of miles away* Mwahahahaahhaha My plan is coming along perfectly!
"Trixie had already begun scrambling down from the tree at Twilight’s appearance, earning more than a few scrapes and fraying her cape and hat more than a little. She paid the damage no mind as she dashed up to Twilight. “Where?” she demanded."
I'm nearly certain those each Twilight should be Lyra.
Was so looking forward to seeing this story continue. Thank you for releasing it to us.
But, uh, small thing:
I'm not sure Twilight belongs there. It seemed like it was supposed to be just Lyra and Bon Bon.
How much do you want to bet they don't filter it?
Nice
aww that was sweet, I loved he use of Luna in this chapter, and bringing in everyone else and hiding them behind the rock was great. Interesting stuff with Trixie and Raindrops, part of me kinda wanted it to go on for longer, but everything that needed to be said was said and it was overall an excellently done scene, good details with Trixie actually puling some feathers out as well, good scene building, I hope we get to see there date!
2880057>>2880062
Corrected.
Okay, Trixie bossing around a very confused Luna just MADE this chapter in the comedy department. It was also heartwarming how her concern for Raindrops completely overrode the terror of an annoyed Princess that she would normally have.
Even without the non-canon romantic angle here, I've always liked the post-Tales of Ponyville relationship between Trixie and Raindrops. Maybe it's true and maybe not, but I always felt like after that point, Raindrops became Trixie's best friend, and the one she relies and depends on the most. Particularly when it comes to trusting someone to help keep herself from going over the line. That really helps the ship feel legitimate for this story.
The way Trixie gives her whole effort to finding Raindrops and making things right is lovely. She's come a long way since she first moved to Ponyville.
I feel really bad for Raindrops - no wonder she felt so guilty and rushed off like that. Sadly, I think she's right - if she invited Trixie out into the woods in the hope that something would happen, then she was taking advantage of Trixie. It turned out alright in the end, but it was still the wrong thing to do. Trixie forgave her, though, so that's the important thing. I have to say, it was brave of you to write Raindrops that way - she really is far from perfect, and not only in her anger issues.
It's very considerate of Twilight to put off her insane plan because Trixie is having trouble with her heat. It's a good sign that she isn't really a bad pony at heart, she simply hasn't thought all the way through the consequences of her actions.
You know, if the canon universe-Trixie saw all this going on, I'd think she'd either die of embarrassment, or envy. I'm not sure which.
You know, if the canon universe-Trixie saw all this going on, I'd think she'd either die of embarrassment, or envy. I'm not sure which.
Not too bad. Very... cathartic to see Luna bossed around. She more than deserves it after the way she treated Trixie like she did. Ugh, I hate working my way through backlog!
She leaped forward, grabbing Raindrops’ tail with telekinesis, hooves, and teeth all, pulling the pegasus towards.
1. I think the end here was unfinished as most of us were lost in the heat of the moment (oh puns) of the story.
Nice, looks like Twilight might finally be coming to her senses.
Course we don't! We are just poor earth pony apple farmers.
We don't have any of this fancy magical city-folk technology.
Heck! We don't even have indoor plumbing!
Eenope
You don't say??
How can you stand to be so DIRTY?! *faints*
wait
Water from the pond is used to water the apple trees
-which bear fruit
-which is used to make Cider...
-and I love apple cider
-which was made from lake water that Trixie was just in...
*meanwhile 1000's of miles away*
Mwahahahaahhaha My plan is coming along perfectly!