He's a Vampire

by Gormless Wheaton

Provision

---

The summer morning light lit up the conference room in a warm glow that at any other time would have been a comfort to the world leaders, especially after yesterday's good news from Pinkie about the severing of her bond. But as they again sat around the table with their attention resting upon the seven individuals before them, many of them felt only discomfort. Except for Gruff, who had fallen asleep.

"I don't think any of us would be against your assistance," Apollon said with his arms crossed, occasionally glancing to his side at the trembling Panthera, who rested his elbows on the table with his paw on his head and clenched teeth bared. "Most of us anyway." The white Persian Abyssinian in the pinstripe suit nodded and adjusted his shawl before inspecting his claws.

"And we are most certainly prepared to contribute our considerable resources and talented individuals to your every undead need," he looked straight at Celestia with a smile. "But as they say, if you're good at something never do it for free." The princess furrowed her brow and looked at the others at the table.

"I suppose we could at least hear what you want. Would anyone be opposed?" Panthera pounded his fists on the table, which jolted Gruff awake with a squawk.

"Of course I am!" Panthera cried.

"I'll take ten!" Gruff added, blinking and looking about at everyone staring at him. "What?" Ember rolled her eyes and pointed at Panthera.

"What's your problem with this guy?" She jabbed her thumb back at the smiling Persian. Panthera clenched his claws and held them towards her.

"My problem is this is obviously a ploy for revenge! Bubsy is still angry I cut their funding, and now he's planning to subvert my authority!" He rose from his seat and swept his arms around the room. "And he's trying to get all of your support to do it!" His wild, angry eyes fell on Bubsy, who held a bemused smile. Panthera hissed through his teeth, but Celestia raised a wing at him.

"Please, let's just hear what Lord Bubsy has to say." The Abyssinian king continued to glare but slowly relaxed into his seat. Celestia turned to Bubsy, who smiled and nodded.

"What we desire is global recognition and support, starting with each nation represented here," he gave a wide gesture to the table, but then his eyes fell upon Graggle and Tangle. "And our preferred first step is an invitation to join this coalition, replacing the compromised Woollachia." Graggle narrowed his eyes and folded his paws while the rest of the table jolted.

"What?!" Tangle squealed.

"Oh, it's just the sheep," Panthera huffed and he sank back in his seat with a laugh. Tangle and Celestia glanced at him, once angrier than the other before turning back to Bubsy.

"What in the world do you mean 'compromised?!'" Tangle demanded, stamping her hoof.

"I mean it in the same way I mean this entire coalition is compromised, of course," he looked at Ember in surprise when she growled loudly and hissed steam between her fangs.

"And what do you mean by that?" She snarled. The four Catican soldiers behind him grasped their weapons, but Bubsy held up his paws.

"This coalition was formed for two reasons: first, to provide defense against the remnant of the Storm King's army, correct?" He looked around the table and nodded. "Then second, to destroy the undead he employed and any spawn they might produce." He looked at Graggle with a glare before slowly shifting to Celestia.

"And yet the Woollachians keep one such abomination in their care, and this coalition turns a blind eye to its existence."

"Peter Harlow is no abomination," Celestia replied.

"Perhaps not in deed, but in nature he is, and categorically at that," he raised an eyebrow with a wry smile. "Regardless of your feelings on the matter." Coal folded his arms as Celestia considered the Abyssinian.

"Nature alone is a tricky thing to base the entirety of judgment upon, but even then you have only the barest understanding of his nature," she declared coolly. Bubsy nodded and clasped his paws together.

"Yes, I understand he is very well-behaved and very polite as it would seem, but it is foolish to believe that will last," he stepped closer to the table. "Our investigations and agents in the field have returned with the notion that Peter Harlow is nourished by the Woollachian public's donation of farm animal blood and blood taken from wild beasts in the woods. Is that correct?" He gestured to Graggle and Tangle, the latter of whom sheepishly nodded, while the former only studied him carefully. Bubsy nodded and again faced the whole table.

"A fine plan, but only for a little while and only while the public is compliant. What happens when the farmers are no longer able or willing to donate to your pet vampire's diet?" Celestia closed her eyes and nodded.

"There are other avenues through which Peter-"

"Feeding a bloodsucker is already heinous enough, but for the ruler of a country to do so with her ponies?" He accused with a raised eyebrow. Celestia paused and then looked him in the eyes.

"I will urge you once to consider yourself and your words more carefully." Bubsy bowed deep before he continued.

"My lady, we have considered much already. And our consideration details an infinite number of terrible outcomes to this ploy you engage in," he studied Celestia critically for a moment, meeting her silent glare. "Even you can not divine all futures. We meanwhile have logic and reason by which we prepare ourselves." He drew himself up with a sigh and held out his paw.

"There may come a time when you and those like you are no longer alive to support the nosferatu. And what then?" He looked across the table at each delegate. "Shall the world inherit the eternal pain of this coalition's decision?" He faced Celestia again.

"Shall he have to live long enough to lose himself to his wicked hunger?" The other coalition members looked between them. The two held each other's eyes and the room seemed to chill before Celestia hummed.

"I believe you've said enough. We must discuss the Catican's offer." Bubsy's smile widened, and he chuckled quietly before reaching into his coat.

"Well, with your permission, I will remain in Canterlot for a few days before returning to the Katskills," he produced a set of black candles which he gently placed on the table before Celestia. "Should any of you find a need after that, you may contact me with these." Celestia nodded and he bowed before turning to one of his attendants who handed him his cane and hat. The group then slipped to the door without another word. Celestia considered the candles before her, noting that their number was two shy compared to the coalition representatives.

"So?" Celestia looked up at Panthera who was the focus of everyone's attention now. He looked around and pointed at Graggle and Tangle. "What's the plan?" The coalition shared a look before Candance shook her head.

"What do you mean?" She asked. Panthera shrugged and gestured at Tangle.

"I mean, we might not be on the best terms, but if the Catican's interested in fighting for the coalition, they're not a bad ally to have," he replied. Apollon rolled his eyes, while Celestia grasped the candle in her magic.

"Such a valued ally you kicked 'em to the curb," he snorted. Panthera growled and pointed at him.

"Different times!" Apollon waved a claw dismissively.

"Doesn't change the fact he's asking us to boot out one of our allies," he leaned into his chair and folded his arms. "However good their hunters are, that's a heck of an ask." Celestia turned the candle over in her grasp, focusing solely on it.

"Not necessarily," she blinked and looked over to see Tangle with her hoof to her chin. "And it is something we were discussing back in Woollachia." Graggle hummed and drew his paw over his eyes, while Tangle looked up at the delegates.

"It seems like most of the Catican's problems aren't with Woollachia or the coalition. Just with Peter," she nodded solemnly. Cadance looked at her aunt, and her ears shot back at the look in her eyes, hidden behind a serene mask to any creature who wasn't family. Celestia's ear twitched and she turned to face Thorax just as he began to speak.

"So, if we remove Prince Harlow from the coalition and Woollachia's government, they'd still help us out?" The changeling pondered aloud, at which Ember grimaced.

"Sounds good to me!" Panthera chirped.

"You don't have that authority," Graggle moaned, rubbing his eyes. "But the Woollachian population will be having a vote on the matter soon. So-"

"They will destroy him." All eyes fell upon Celestia, who stared ahead at the door Bubsy left through. "They mean to remove him from our midst so that any harm that befalls him will not be taken as an act against us." Tangle's ears pressed against her skull, and she tapped her chin as everyone considered the princess' words.

"Would that be so wrong?" Novo offered. "He is still a vampire." Celestia did not turn to face her right away, instead taking a deep breath. Cadance wilted at the sight.

"If any of you stab Pete in the back, the United Cities will withdraw all support from this coalition and will nullify any trade agreements and land deals we have with the offending nation," Coal declared and pounded his fist on the table. Panthera squawked and shot up, while Apollon burst out in laughter. Celestia exhaled hard before turning to the panicking Abyssinian.

"Bu-bu-but! We just spent all that time on our black powder weapon contract! How're we supposed to defend against the Remnant's airships without them?!" Panthera screamed. Coal shrugged and jabbed a thumb at Ember.

"Phobia or no, you still have the dragons." Panthera wilted and looked at Ember, visibly shuddering as she grinned and wagged her claws at him. Coal leaned back in his seat. "The United Cities have survived without a king or emperor or anything like that for six centuries because instead of some goofy 'right to rule' being our basis for government, we lean on the contract." He held up one hand and began counting off with his fingers.

"Whether on paper, in stone, in wood, or through speech or a gift, a promise between two parties is everything. No minotaur will ever break his promise first," he folded his arms and snorted a heavy gout of steam. "And on behalf of the United Cities, I gave Peter Harlow a gift as a contract between us and him." He glared daggers at Panthera.

"So if you force the United Cities to break that contract, well," he cracked his neck. "That's just about the most heinous crime you can commit." Ember snickered as Panthera gulped and fell back into his seat. Coal stroked his beard and snorted again.

"If the Woollachians give him the boot, that's between him and them. But the United Cities have a contract with him to keep him employed. End of story."

"Besides," Ember leaned back in her seat and inspected her claws. "The guy showed up drunk and made a bunch of ballsy claims and promises. Then, once he sobered up, he still went out and did them anyway." She snapped her claws and looked at the rest of the table.

"Half the dragons I know woulda tried to wriggle out of the agreement, since, y'know, it was made while he was drunk."

"Yeah!" Cadance cheered, spreading her wings. "He ran off to help all of us out without a second thought! We can't just let some hokey mountain cat clan spit on that." She looked at every attendee as she made her declaration. Thorax hummed and grimaced.

"I didn't think of it like that," he groused, and Ember punched him in the shoulder. Gruff looked around the room and scowled.

"What're we talking about?"

"The vampire," Ember explained, Gruff nodded.

"Ah, alright then," he laid his head back on the table and closed his eyes. Celestia looked to either side and took a shallow breath.

"Well, I believe we can at least agree that we won't be expelling Peter unless anyone has further qualms they wish to present?" The table was quiet for a moment before Apollon cleared his throat.

"If Woollachia expels him, what then?" Celestia considered the eagle for a moment.

"I will personally see to his care and provision. It will not be an issue." They locked eyes before Apollon hummed and nodded.

---

"Set me free. Thrice reborn in the Dark. Set me free."

I couldn't breathe. Martin was glaring down at me from the ledge he threw me from. Mom and Will were at his sides, crying, and that thing had its claws around their necks, resting its head on Martin's shoulder.

"Set me free. Life is a cruelty. Let us put an end to it."

Its face split sideways and sank its needle-like teeth into Martin and twisted Mom and Will's necks with a crack before dragging all three into itself. I tried to scream, but nothing came out. The darkness comprising the monster filled my vision and I saw the door again, hovering over me.

"Set me free."

I finally took a breath and sat up, only to be met by a scream and a thud. I blinked and looked around, finding I was in a dark cozy little room with two beds and a nightstand between them. Looking down, I saw Quilt lying on her back on the floor.

"Peter?" She murmured as she slowly got to her hooves and reared up on the bed's edge.

"Hey," I huffed, still breathing hard. She furrowed her brow and climbed up next to me.

"What happened to you?" I scooted over to give her more room and hummed, folding my hands together.

"Saw some freaky shit after I took Candy's dark magic. Just had a nightmare about it," I took a shuddering breath and looked her in the eyes. "I think I need to talk to Celestia about it." She put her hoof on my knee.

"What'd you see?" I grimaced and gestured weakly trying to find the words.

"Weird, horse-headed shadow monster asking me to set it free," I finally muttered, clenching my hand shut as I spoke. "Some creepy-looking door kept popping up." I looked at her hopefully, but she seemed lost and looked down in thought.

"That's.. hm."

"Any clue what that'd be about?" She shook her head and sighed.

"Sorry. But on the bright side you should get to ask her pretty soon," she said with a sad smile. "Calaeno and her crew are digging in the ship's wreckage for our candle to report in and request somewooly to come pick us up."

"Why's she doing that? She should be resting," I said with a frown.

"Yeah, but she said she got plenty of rest last night." I flinched and looked at the closed curtains.

"What time even is it?"

"Around noon. Almost everywooly else has been up and around for a little while, especially Twilight," she laid down on the bed next to me.

"Why Twilight?"

"You remember the pink mare who started the mob?" I nodded. "Well, she's the Honorable Chairmare of the Shang-hay Republic now."

"The huh of the what of the who?"

"Yeah, right?" Quilt laughed and tucked her legs under herself. "Also the pirates split up. Most of them ran off once they realized Hop's dead, but about a third are still around and negotiating with the Republic and the police." She hummed and nodded.

"And the changelings." I raised my eyebrows at that.

"They're still around?"

"Yep. Twilight's got her hooves full."

"What's she got to do with any of that?" Quilt giggled.

"She's a recognized authority from a neighboring power, so they demanded she oversee the negotiations in exchange for letting us rest and recover," she looked towards the door. "They've been going for most of the morning. Wonder how it's going?"

---

"The changelings are basically a part of Shang-hay now! Why shouldn't we get a part of it to ourselves?!" Ante the changeling representative hissed.

"Because the only reason you're a part of Shang-hay is because you infiltrated it and disguised yourselves as our friends and family!" Half Acre the unicorn captain of the new police retorted.

"Sure, but that also means we're already practically family!" Ante put forth to calls of agreement from the rest of the changelings. Bloodletter, the pug diamond dog who replaced Hop as the commodore raised his paw.

"Me have to say, changeling fake-brother better than real brother," he said, which a few of the ponies and other creatures in the room hummed in consideration of.

"That is true! I move in support of the establishment of the changeling quarter in the northwestern part of the city," Sourpatch said with a nod. Ante scowled, however.

"NORTH WESTERN?!" He bellowed. Twilight held her foreleg over her snout and suppressed a groan.

---

"Meh, probably mind-numbingly boring," Quilt huffed. "Glad it's not me in there."

"How's everyone else?"

"Well, like I said, Calaeno's scavenging, and Cozy and Sunbeam are still asleep in the room next to this one," she tapped her chin.

"Is Hasty okay?" I sat up and asked. Before Quilt could respond, the door opened, and in walked Hasty with Blueblood.

"Oh hey! You're awake," he chirped, looking perfectly healthy. My jaw hung open and I narrowed my eyes. He smiled in response. "Guess what Prince Blueblood found?" I slowly turned to Blueblood who pulled a crate in with his magic.

"I took a closer look at the enemy vampire's lab, and discovered his notes and supply," he opened the crate and pulled out a bottle. "He was producing magic elixirs in bulk. Including healing potions, like this one." He floated it to my hand.

"We just gave a dose to everypony who got hurt on the team," Hasty explained, turning to show the scars on his side. "It ain't perfect, but it sure beats the natural method!"

"Huh," I gawped taking and staring at the bottle.

"We were going to just inform Ms. Quilt of the development, but it's a delightful surprise to see you well, Master," Blueblood declared, bowing his head at me. Quilt scoffed in response.

"Ain't it a delight to see me?" She smiled at him, causing Blueblood to look up, and then to the side. Quilt held her expression for a moment before Blueblood slowly nodded.

"Uh, sure." Quilt beamed as Blueblood and Hasty turned for the door, setting the crate and notebook down. "Well, we'll leave this here. We're still waiting on Princess Twilight to finish mediation." He pulled a bottle from the crate.

"We're gonna find Calaeno since I think she's still hurt," Hasty said with a farewell wave. Blueblood bowed his head again, and the two walked out. I relaxed and examined the potion he handed me before humming in realization.

"Probably could've teleported them to her," I said. Quilt's ears twitched and she sat up.

"Oh yeah! I was planning to ask you about that," I looked at her and she tilted her head. "They said you teleported into the apartment. Without being invited first." I blinked and looked at the ceiling, pondering what she said.

"Thats.. How'd I do that?"

"Probably something to do with your magic, but I wouldn't be surprised if the extra dark magic you absorbed from the first vampire did, too. What was happening out on that boat?" She tilted her head and I hummed in thought.

"I mean at the time it was sinking," I finally recalled. She tapped her chin and her eyes shifted left and right.

"Maybe it was an urgency thing? We'll have to experiment with it once we get back home," she blinked and then looked up at me with a grin. "Once you've had your fill of Frill, anyhow." I flinched.

"Wh-"

"I know you're dying to get back to your favoritest 'lil sheep, so well save the testing until you two are done," She tapped me on the chest and her smirk grew three sizes. "Since I know she's dying to have you back, too." She stared smugly at me for a solid minute before I gently wrapped my hands around her shoulders, scanned for Twilight with my Eye, and then teleported to her.

"Peter?" She said as we appeared, cutting off the whole meeting and getting everyone's attention. Quilt looked around as I held her up for the whole room to see, Simba style.

"Quilt wants to help," I said, setting her down in the seat next to Twilight. Her jaw dropped and she stammered.

"Really? Aw, thanks!" Twilight said, wrapping her in a wing. She leaned closer and whispered. "I could use the company, I was about to lose my mind." Quilt glared up at me as I teleported out.

---

Nothing grew in this region, but the reason why is not known. It is possible that the Longhorn's excessive tinkering with dark magic poisoned the land beyond the mountains and ruined it, but the Woollachian populace had never ventured this far west even before the Longhorns rose to prominence. So there was a distinct possibility it had always been this way.

Under the sun, stained grey by the clouds of ash that filled the sky, a fat crow soared west from the mountains and then south, towards New Ramstead, the collection of empty clay houses the Longhorns had erected after their exile, where they tried to survive the wastes. The bird had lived here, feasting upon the bodies of the Longhorns for many years, but ever since the arrival of his new master, he had been away.

He circled above the village and slowly descended in front of the house with the only well. He peered at the dark interior, leaning forward to get a better view.

He cawed out three times and something inside shuddered.

"Back already?" In the dark a figure slowly shambled up off the ground and shuffled out into the light, hissing and wincing as the sun met his eyes. Briefs blinked and shook his head before looking upon his familiar. "Well?"

The crow bobbed up and down and tilted his head before cawing again. Briefs shook himself and a thin cloud of dust fell from his wool. As the crow spoke, he approached the well and drew a bucket of water.

"Shang-hay.." He set the bucket down between himself and the crow before laughing "He didn't try to run away?" The crow cawed again and hopped onto the edge of the bucket. Briefs scoffed as he and his familiar drank. He sighed and stretched.

"Well, that makes two. Did you find Adam, or whatever he's calling himself?" He asked, rubbing his chin. The crow replied, causing Briefs to scowl. "The Storm Isles? Wouldn't that be the first place they'd look?" As the crow explained what he'd seen, Briefs slipped back inside and dragged the remains of a long-dead and rotten sheep out with his teeth. He paused as the crow reached the end of its report and shook his head with a deep laugh.

"Some creatures, I swear," he sighed and turned to his companion. "Good work. Now, you only have to keep an eye on Adam. Join me and then be off." The crow chirped and hopped on the carcass as he and his master feasted.

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END OF ACT 4

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