He's a Vampire

by Gormless Wheaton

Wight on the Warpath II

---

I drifted the deck unseen by the host of dogs and ponies aboard, silently observing as they sharpened their stakes, adjusted their crossbows, or just wondered at the little ewe wandering the ship alone. Quilt stayed at my side as I explored, while Sunbeam and Cozy were below decks keeping watch over my coffin.

"Don't worry, Peter!" Cozy had said. "I won't stake you yet. We need you to lure the other vampires out first!"

Her thinly veiled threats cheered Sunbeam up, so I made no argument. Floating up to the quarterdeck, we approached Starlight and Blueblood at the helm.

"Oh hey, Quilt, right?" Starlight called with a smile, while Blueblood spared her only a momentary glance.

"You got it," Quilt replied as she sat next to the helm.

"I thought you were downstairs with the other two and the vampire?" Starlight asked. Quilt snickered at her inability to see me.

"I was, but he wanted to walk around," The two ponies blinked and looked around.

"She says walk, but it's more like a ghostly hover," I declared, causing them both to jump.

"Master?" Blueblood stepped off the helm and looked for me in the spot where he'd heard my voice. Starlight, however, gasped and shoved him aside.

"Twilight mentioned this! She called it 'Stupor' I think," Starlight explained, studying the air I was in closely.

"Exactly that," I confirmed. "Instead of sleeping, I turn into a ghost and leave my body behind."

"Incredible!" Blueblood said before returning his focus to the helm. "Well, what can I do for you?" I looked over the skies, noticing the enemy ships dotting the air.

"Shit," I muttered. "They're everywhere." There were dozens of them, and even if we had a numbers advantage, which wasn't guaranteed, they could sink us without boarding.

"It looks bad, Master, but you'll notice none of them are moving to intercept us," Blueblood declared. "Identifying our crew would require a closer inspection than I believe we'll be enduring."

"Why's that?"

"Well, they're all sitting above villages and towns," Starlight pointed out. "I think they're more focused on pillaging than patrolling."

"Which means we have a clear path to Canterlot," Blueblood added, looking through his spyglass.

I turned to face the same direction and focused my eyes. Miles off, I could see the alabaster towers and walls of Canterlot. Or most of it anyway. There was a shroud of black clouds settled over the roofs of the city, so that only the tallest tower of the castle was plainly visible.

Scanning the area around it, I could see the mountain path leading up to the gates of the city splitting the fields in half. An idea formed in my mind.

"Land us outside the city if you can," I asked, turning to Quilt. "Go get Cozy and Sunbeam, and I need to know how long you can hold those illusions." I then drew myself up and faced the dogs.

"Attention all Diamond Dogs!" I called. The entire crew jumped and looked up at the quarterdeck before panicking.

"Master?"

"No see him!"

"Master is ghost? Master is dead!"

"Me no have severance package!"

I rubbed my ethereal face.

"It's just magic! Shut up and listen!" Starlight yelled, which drew sighs of relief and calls of understanding.

"Thank god for you," I said to her. She hummed in appreciation as I addressed the crew again. "We'll be landing outside Canterlot soon. Remember! If you see a creature that looks like me, use the ash wood weapons we gave you! To clarify, two legs and two arms, mostly hairless, with fangs. Do not look them directly in the eyes!" I looked over the crew as they saluted, and adjusted their belts where their vampire-killing tools were kept.

"Stay in groups of at least three when we land!" I continued. "And when we do, I need the best diggers off the ship first. This next part is crucial!"

---

"There we go!" Cozy said, finishing the garlic polish on Sunbeam's horseshoes. "Now, if you get in close quarters with one of them, your bucks will actually hurt." Her cheery expression fell when she saw Sunbeam's distant stare. She hopped next to her and wrapped a foreleg around her.

"But that's just a hypothetical. Just stick close to me or Peter, and it won't happen," she declared, holding her friend tight. Sunbeam blinked and took a deep breath.

"Right," she whispered, her eyes locked on the coffin before them until the sound of hoof steps came at the stairs.

"Hey, you two," Quilt called as she stepped into the dim light. "Peter wants you up top. He's explaining the game plan." The pair blinked and looked from Quilt to the coffin.

"Just go with it," Quilt muttered.

---

Adam set the cage holding Twilight into position before stepping away to inspect the other princesses as Tempest approached and leered at Twilight.

"Tempest, please, don't do this!" Twilight begged. "If you give the Storm King our magic-"

"He'll what?" Tempest asked with a grim laugh. "Conjure a few rain clouds? Oh! Maybe he'll hold the sun hostage!" She leaned into the bars of Twilight's cage, causing the princess to retreat from her.

"The only thing I know and care he'll do is restore my horn, princess."

"Doubtful," Adam said. Tempest whipped around to look at him.

"What was that?" She demanded. Adam didn't face her or Twilight who was watching the vampire with curiosity.

"Whether, as I suspect, he will break his promise or external elements will interfere," Adam slowly looked back at her. "He will not fulfill his end of your bargain." Tempest's jaw hung open as she locked eyes with the vampire, and a heavy silence held dominion over the room.

"You-"

"Well, it's about time!" the Storm King yelled as he stepped into the room, causing Tempest to look his way. "I was beginning to suspect a mutiny." He strode into the center of the room, eyes locked on Tempest.

"Where's Hurricane?" He asked. Tempest flinched and looked back, noticing the vampire had vanished completely.

"He was just.."

"Whatever!" The Storm King declared, pushing past her to the center of the room and readying his staff. "Let's get this show on the road!"

Twilight almost didn't notice, instead watching the faint mist slip under the door at the side of the room.

---

"Thank Celestia for them clouds," Applejack whispered as her group slinked through the back alleys. The ponies regarded the dark shroud above with similar gratitude as the darkness had allowed them to sneak into Canterlot. Calaeno kept her eyes skyward but for a different reason.

"That just confirms Adam and his monsters are lurking somewhere around here," she hissed. Her crew huddled close, each keeping watch in a different direction.

"I hadn't thought of that," Skystar whimpered, hugging the ground. Rarity patted her on the back, which did little to ease her fears.

"We just need to get at that machine they've got," Capper declared with a confident smile, and tug of his coat. "There's one back in Klugetown I've taken a few peeks at. I can get us back in the sunlight."

The rest of the group looked back at the Abyssinian, and then at each other.

"We need to save Twilight before anything else," Rainbow declared before wincing up at the darkness above. "But maybe we could split up? Half go with Capper to break their dumb cloud machine?"

"You mean out in the open?" Fluttershy asked with a quiver.

"Which half, though?" Spike added. The group sat in contemplation before Pinkie suddenly jolted forward and pressed her ear to the ground.

"What the heck are you doing?" Rainbow whispered.

"Something's scratching down there," Pinkie replied as she listened to the ground. With the whole group watching her in confusion, Skystar was the only one to notice the arrival of three other creatures in the alley.

And so she was the first to scream.

Her outburst jolted the party to attention, and they all looked up to see, to their horror, a pair of storm beasts flanking a human-vampire staring right at them.

---

Starlight, Blueblood, and I followed the road weaving up to the gate. The pair had hauled my coffin from where we left the ship to the edge of the clouds, and from there we marched in anxious silence.

"Look at that.." Starlight whispered as the city spread out before us. Kept under perpetual darkness, lamps, and streetlights were also kept lit constantly. The faint glow failed to fully illuminate the buildings, but it confirmed something I'd asked my companions about.

"Narrow streets, good," I declared. I looked down at Starlight as the gate guards came into view. "Are you two going to be able to see?"

"I have a spell for it," she replied. "I'll throw it down once we clear the gate." I nodded as the guards readied their spears.

"Halt in the name of the Storm King!" One of them ordered.

"Sure thing," I replied. The pair shared a look before marching up to us.

"Identify yourselves!" One of them demanded.

"Yeah, hey, look here," I said, leaning closer and waving a hand over my eyes. The pair leaned in with a curious hum, and I snapped my fingers at them. They blinked and stumbled.

"Get that gate open," I ordered, and they rushed to obey. Starlight snickered, and Blueblood hummed in approval.

"So that's what that looks like," he appraised. "Of course, I imagine I embraced the spell with more dignity."

"Sure, let's go with that," I replied as we stepped into the city. I waved in the guards. "You two are replacing these two, let's go." They moved to my side as Starlight and Blueblood teleported away. Looking up at the rooftops, I saw a brief flash and nodded.

"Take me to whatever's making these clouds," I ordered. "Discreetly, if you can." The pair nodded and began tramping down the road. Further up the road, a patrol of guards was marching towards us, so we slipped off the main road and into an alley.

And then a scream rang out. I screamed back and slapped a hand over my face as I heard shouts coming from up the road.

"Peter?!" A familiar voice yelled. I blinked and saw Twilight's friends and a score of new creatures huddled together, some brandishing weapons.

"Pinkie?!" I yelled back.

"Identify yourselves!" A guard yelled. Looking at my two, I saw they were still hypnotized, so I turned to see the alleyway was blocked by the bodies of at least twelve storm beasts, one of whom blew into a horn that echoed across the city. I held up one finger at Pinkie and company before hurling a gout of fire that swept over the entire guard squad, who fell away screaming.

"We have a minute, so what the fuck?" I huffed, walking closer to the discomfort of their new friends.

"Language," Rarity chided.

"Right," I replied.

"We're trying to rescue Twilight!" Pinkie declared, rapidly shuffling her hooves as she spoke. "There'sabunchofmeanvampiresworkingforthisguycalledtheStormKingandtheyshowedupandtookoverCanterlotand-" Applejack shoved a hoof in her mouth.

"Thank you," I sighed. "I already know about the Storm King and the vampires and all that. That's why we're here. Where's Twilight?"

"One of the vampires grabbed her!" The tiny purple dragon declared. "They've got her locked up in the castle!"

"Gotcha," I nodded. "So, wha-"

"Hold up!" One of the bird people yelled. "This guy's clearly one of Adam's!" My eyes snapped up and met hers, causing her to shiver.

"Not one of Adam's, just also a vampire," I corrected, and extended a hand with a smile. "Peter Harlow, Prince of Woollachia and friend to the silly little pony race." The birds stared in confusion at my hand and declarations, before the cat man slowly slid up.

"Prince, huh?" He chuckled, shaking my hand. "Capper. Pleased to make further acquaintance with royalty." I nodded back.

"So, we're on the same page and same side," I declared. "Let's talk about how we make the most of it." The bird people relaxed slightly, but the small bird horse who'd screamed upon seeing me still eyed me fearfully. Rarity wrapped a foreleg around her back.

"He's not like the others, princess. Trust us," she said. The bird-horse princess looked at her and back to me before humming quietly. A new horn rang out, and I heard the noise of many feet rushing for our position.

"Our minute's up, let's go," I said firmly, striding out into the street. Capper and a few of the ponies followed, but the rest, especially Rarity stayed behind hissing for me to come back.

Out in the street, there was a host of guards rushing into formation around us. The narrow street kept them huddled close, however.

Just as planned.

"Quilt, stealth's out the window. Are you near me?" I psychically called out.

"Identify yourselves!" One of the soldiers roared as their circle tightened.

"I think? Can you give us a sign where you are?" Quilt responded. I stomped my foot on the road hard enough to crack the stone and startle the guards, causing an echoing boom beneath the earth. "Fleeces Tuft! Yeah, we're under you, you tail hole!"

"Seize them!" One of the soldiers ordered.

"Loose the dogs of war," I called to Quilt.

As the formation rushed in they came to a halt as paving stones and earth exploded up from the road, revealing deep pits down into a vast tunnel. I raised one hand and slowly pointed forward.

"CHARGE!"

At my command, our army of dogs and pony guards burst out of the holes and stormed forward with spears and shields out. The formation was taken completely by surprise and broke immediately. Soldiers who didn't fall back were either skewered or thrown to the ground as dozens of dogs spilled onto the street. Once the initial rush was topside, one of the dogs looked around and whistled down the hole before waving to me.

"Cloud machine! Let's go!" I called to the party still in the alley before taking off down the street led by my two storm beasts, the dog in my company making occasional calls and howls to signal the diggers below.

After only a block or two, the rest of the party caught up with me. Far ahead, from the direction of the castle, we saw a streak of blue lightning explode out which filled all the clouds with a constant glow.

"Twilight!" The little dragon cried. I brought our group to a halt and whistled to a nearby cluster of dogs who stopped beating on the storm beasts they'd pinned and rushed to my side.

"You boys are heading for the castle," I ordered before turning to the party. "I gotta destroy the cloud machine. Whoever's heading to the castle, take these guys with you." Twilight's friends and the little dragon nodded and along with the bird-horse and dogs rushed for the castle.

"Let's move," I said as the two storm beasts took off. Capper was the only one who followed me immediately, the others lagging behind. I heard them holding a hushed conversation.

"Not how I expected today to go," one of them muttered. My Evil Eye twitched.

"Yeah, well- Look out!" Another suddenly shouted. Looking up I saw what she was calling attention to.

There was a line of storm beasts with crossbows on a balcony aiming at us. Before they could shoot, however, a cyan laser screamed through the air and exploded on the balcony, sending them tumbling to the ground. Looking back over my shoulder, I waved to Starlight and Blueblood, the former's horn smoking as she waved back.

"This way sir!" My storm beast called, and we rushed into a wide, well-lit plaza, where a score of guards and ponies in chains were found, as well as the machine we were looking for right in the middle between us and the storm beasts.

Just like the ones on the ships, it was a large metal frame full of spinning wheels and pistons, with two huge tanks on either side that fed into a funnel sitting on some kind of Tesla coil-looking thing. Out of the funnel, black electrified clouds were spiraling up to the sky.

Before the guards could move upon us, the dog in our party whistled once, and the ground rumbled. Just as the guards got into formation, a deep trench collapsed in front of them, and more dogs came bounding up and crashed into the storm beasts. Capper and I rushed for the machine.

A small line of storm beasts managed to dash around the trench and the tide of dogs, and formed a line between us and the machine. I rushed up to them and grabbed the first spear that came at me. Using it and its wielder as a club, I swept the entire line away. The sight demoralized the already shaken enemy force, and so the plaza was quickly falling under our control, despite reinforcements arriving from where we'd come from.

Capper came to a sliding halt at the control of the machine and started delicately removing a panel.

"Alright, just give me-"

I hefted the machine up and slammed it back down three times until it made a shuddering whine and clattered before the last of its stream slipped free.

"Okay, or that works too," he whispered.

I hurled the broken machine towards a distant line of storm beasts and scanned the plaza. The bird-woman and her pals were running circles around the guards who'd just shown up, with the woman herself parrying a whole line of spears all at once with her cutlass and then tumbling over them, cutting throats and arms as she rolled.

"Damn," I huffed.

"No kidding," Capper affirmed. I looked around and saw one of the holes the diamond dogs were pouring out of shimmer and vanish. Up on the roof, Starlight and Blueblood were in position. I nodded and pulled my axe out.

"Hey," I slipped a stake free from my bundle and handed it to Capper. "Keep that on you."

---

The vampire trio stood in the hall just outside the Canterlot library, waiting for their leader to finish examining the book they'd stolen and deliberately ignoring the chaos outside, despite repeated orders from the Storm King to get outside relayed by messengers. The most recent and insistent of them lay dead at their feet, completely drained of blood.

Adam scanned the pages as he leafed through them. Once he was halfway through the tome, he stopped and turned a page back over. His eyes locked onto a few lines, and he winced, something his comrades did not fail to notice.

"Something wrong?" Candy asked. Adam hummed in response as he studied the page a few times.

"I believe this will work for our purposes," he finally declared, snapping the book shut. Dog leaned forward at the hips with a raised eyebrow.

"But you saw something you didn't like," he declared. Adam shook his head.

"A personal item, nothing that will hinder us," he replied, turning away from them. "We have what we need. The time has come." Dog hissed a laugh, and Candy stamped out his cigarette.

"Aw! But big man's so jolly with his new toy," Dog cackled, jutting a thumb to the frenzied storm clouds through the window. "Least he'll die happy."

"You sure his boys are going to fall in line?" Candy asked as the trio set off down the hall.

"The soldiers he has afield are not a concern," Adam explained. "The Storm Isles and much of his conquered territory are now hosts to a plethora of souls who are loyal to us. Immortality seekers and the sort." He ripped a window from its frame and gestured to Candy.

"Pursue the next phase, if you would," he ordered. With a nod, Candy turned to a pale yellow mist and slipped outside. Leaning out the window, Adam watched the tail end of the generated clouds slither into the sky.

"The rebels have destroyed the storm machine," he declared. "We're short on time. Let's-"

Looking down into the well-lit plaza, he saw him. Human in shape and displaying tremendous strength, he hurled the ruined storm machine into a line of soldiers.

"It's him," Adam whispered. Dog leaned past him and looked out.

"Who?" He asked. Adam pulled him back inside to face him.

"He's a vampire," Adam declared. "I have no time to explain. You must kill him." Dog choked and stumbled, held up only by Adam's grip.

"Hold on! There's another?" He cried, stealing a few glances down to the newcomer. "Shouldn't we, like, recruit him or-"

"Absolutely not," Adam firmly retorted. "I don't know what he is capable of, but of us two, you are the better fighter. I will eliminate the Storm King. The sun will clear the clouds soon, so we must hurry. Please."

That was the second time Adam had ever spoken with any urgency. Dog looked him in the eyes and slowly nodded.

"Gotcha, I guess."

---

There was a pitched fight happening inside the castle now, as Twilight's friends and a mix of pony guards and dogs rolled into what seemed to be only a few handfuls of storm beasts. I followed them with my Evil Eye, praying the other vampires' focus would fall on the guy who'd ruined their cloud cover.

The plaza was clear of storm beasts, allowing Calaeno's pirates, now that she had a chance to introduce herself, to start freeing the ponies from their chains. Capper and Calaeno both scanned the plaza nervously.

"Hey, so uh," Capper suddenly said. "What are we-"

My Evil Eye started spasming worse than ever before. Something wicked this way came. I had a solid guess what the source was.

"Vampire's coming, one of Adam's," I huffed. Capper and Calaeno gasped as I turned to address the entire army. "Clear the plaza! Get everyone to cover!" They rushed to obey as the dogs and pirates hauled ponies into nearby shops or down the trench, leaving me alone in the center of the plaza.

Stowing my axe in my belt, I loaded my crossbow and did a sweep. Up on the rooftops, I saw the faint shadow of something moving very quickly, leaping from building to building as it beelined towards me.

Then he leaped out of the clouds, and I took the shot. It passed right through as he turned to mist and then back.

"FROM THE TOP ROPE!" He yelled as he came crashing down elbow-first into my face. Despite his being a vampire, just like with Boss, his attack failed to hurt me.

As a result, I was very aware that I never hit the ground. Instead, he caught me with his other arm, dragged me in a spin, and hurled me in the air. Before I could react, he tackled me in midair and slammed me into the roof he'd initially jumped from.

"How it do?" He yelled, pinning both my arms under his boots. "Name's Mad Dog! Picked it out myself!" He reached down and grabbed either side of my head.

"And you, sir, are about to slip from the census!" He yanked my head to the side and brought me into a tumble along the roof before hurling me again with a kick.

"Condolences to your nonexistent widow!" He called as he ripped a board from the roof he was standing on and charged after me. I caught myself in the air and hurled a wad of fire his way.

"HOH!" He shrieked as he swung his beam through the fire. "Fuck was-"

I teleported behind him and tried to slam a stake in his back, missing entirely as he turned to mist again, before reforming in a way that let him grapple me by the arm and throw me to the street with him on top.

"Vampire magic's a new one!" He declared before I teleported again. "And I already hate it!" He blinked and looked up at where I was floating.

I stared down at him as he slowly rose to his feet, and drew another stake since I'd lost my grip on the other one, like the crossbow. I could tell what was happening. His Evil Eye was at least as sharp as mine, probably sharper. I'd need to ruin his focus to get by it.

"So-"

My attempt at banter was cut off when he went running down the street towards a pony chain gang that hadn't made it to cover, where he stomped on the chain and pulled one of them free.

"Work release!" He called as he hurled the squealing pony at me like a football.

"Mother-fuck!" I threw out my magic and caught them in mid-air, and was immediately blindsided by Mad Dog who came flying up alongside them. I gurgled in pain as he slammed the stake he must have swiped off me into my stomach.

"Bingo-bongo!" He slipped up behind me and pulled me into a headlock with his hands over my face. "Bob's your uncle!" He yanked and sent us both plummeting towards the earth.

We didn't fall far before he was blasted off of me through a window, and I managed to wrench the stake out. Looking to where the blast came from, I saw Starlight and Blueblood, the latter of whom had the pony I caught safely in his magic.

"Get all the ponies to cover!" I yelled and pointed at the remaining chain gangs before flying after Mad Dog through the hole he'd made.

---

Right as my head cleared the wall I was nailed in the eyes with a cracked window pane, blinding me.

"Son of a-"

I felt myself get yanked further inside and then slammed into the floor, before free-falling and hitting a lower floor. Wiping my eyes, I narrowly saw Mad Dog come flying down at me with another stake he must've stolen.

I turned into mist, and he punched clear through to the floor below us, where I heard more glass shattering. Flowing up to the hole we'd both made, I looked around and spotted the shimmering patch of road. I reformed and hopped down to street level, turning to peek back inside. I narrowly caught a wine barrel that came crashing through, followed by Mad Dog as he burst through the window and barrel, spilling wine everywhere.

He managed to stab me with his stake, but I'd thrown myself backward so it failed to stick. He slipped briefly on the wine, before lunging after me as I flew back.

Just as planned.

"Quilt, he's right above you!" I psychically called out. From the hole hidden under an illusory road Quilt had conjured, Cozy leaped up in front of Mad Dog.

"HAHA! Got you!" Cozy yelled, brandishing her cutie crucifix. Mad Dog stopped dead and dropped his stake.

"Fuck is that?!" Mad Dog shrieked as he hurled himself away from her. I teleported past Cozy and took a swing at Mad Dog with my stake but he slipped on the spilled wine and fell flat on the ground before turning to mist.

"Damn it!" I growled. "Don't let him down the tunnel!" Cozy kept her trinket up and aimed at the mist around me as Sunbeam climbed out with her ash spear ready. Rather than rush them, Mad Dog slipped into the air and wafted towards the roof of a nearby tower.

"I'll try to get him back down here!" I called to Cozy as I flew up after him.

Rising past the ledge of the tower top, I saw him standing with his hands on his hips, coat thrown aside, heels together, and bouncing on the tips of his boots as if to some beat only he could hear. He wore an expectant smile upon seeing me, despite the ugly scorch mark where Starlight had blasted him.

"Nah, Nah, take your time. Ain't like I got nowhere to be," he said warmly. I landed on the edge and took a step closer, brandishing my stake and axe. He looked me up and down and smiled wider.

"Ain't got a clue what that bullshit was, but hoo!" He huffed. "Think I might get why Adam's so skeeved about yah." He leaned forward at the hips, still smiling.

"I know I'm done sick of your shit already," his eyes shimmered, and I could feel his Evil Eye honing in on me.

"I've heard that name before," I replied, looking for some way to spoil his Evil Eye's focus. "He's your brother or something, right?"

"In spirit, not blood," he clarified, still bouncing. "More importantly, he's the lad what woke me 'n Candy up, then taught us everything we needed to know."

"Candy? Another spirit brother?"

"Bingo," he replied, sweeping one leg over the other, as he slowly paced his side of the roof.

"Adam's probably the only normal name between you three, I gotta say," I said, mirroring his movements.

"Told ya, I picked my name myself. All of us did," he bent at the knees and stretched. "Adam said it's best to separate ourselves from who we used to be. Shouldn't sully the men-that-were with our sinful nature or something." Well, that statement sure was packed. I hummed as I considered my next words.

"Y'know, now that you're not zipping around and body slamming me," I finally said. "Part of me wants to suggest the potential for us to resolve this peacefully."

"Well! All of me wants to firmly state 'ain't no way,'" he said with a hearty laugh. "Trust me, even if you hadn't taken the first shot, this'd still all be in self-defense. I came here to bleed your soul out, and brother?" He leaned forward again.

"I intend to." Before I could respond, a thunderous boom echoed from overhead.

We both turned to see a massive arch of lightning swirling up into the clouds from the balcony at the castle, transforming the remaining clouds into a flashy, swirling mess.

"What was that?" I asked just before my Evil Eye twitched, and I dumbly turned back to Mad Dog to get a face full of his hand. In the same movement, he wrenched my stake up, slipped it into my ribs, and twisted his wrist, snapping my neck.

Releasing his grip, my body fell limply and my ghost slipped out.

"Fuck," I huffed.

"Yeah," he replied. "Not quite a decap, but good enough I think." He studied me closely as I tried to repossess my body to no avail.

"Fuck," I desperately huffed. He snorted in response.

"Well son, I'mma get outta here," he slapped his hands together and looked at the superstorm forming near the castle. "Dumbass-in-Chief's about to get his teeth pounded in, and when he does, seeing as that big storm's sucking up all that lovely cloud cover.."

He looked skyward to where the sun had been and pointed his finger, tracing a line from that point to me with a whistle before snapping and popping his lips once his finger reached where I lay.

"So you enjoy that tan!"

"Fuck," I heaved. He leaned backward and hummed.

"Now that I think about it, though, I could go for a snack," he said, rolling his head with a crack, and rubbing his magic wound. "And I'd just love to get to know that little lamb with the shiny little totem.."

"Don't you fucking-"

"Sorry, didn't catch that. I don't speak 'loser,'" he chirped and leaped off the roof to the street far below.

I was shaking. I tried to hover but was pinned. Instead, I threw out my Evil Eye to warn them but saw Mad Dog was already in their midst.

"GODDAMN IT!" I screamed. I blew it.

All that work, all that time, all that effort.

He's moving on Sunbeam and Cozy.

It was all for fucking nothing.

Quilt's lessons, my magic practice, all for noth...

Magic.

Wait.

I looked down at my corpse and blinked. Something was very familiar about this. Something Celestia had said.

"For instance! Did you know that eight out of ten cases of hauntings are just vampiric sorcerers who were staked, but not destroyed?"

"No?"

"It's true! They use their magic to harass the living, despite being unable to leave where their body lay."

I held my breath, prayed I was right, and slowly raised my hand towards the stake. Throwing out my magic, I felt it latch on and start to pull free.

"Celestia, you beautiful creature."

---

"Back! Spawn of Tartar-"

Cozy was cut off when Mad Dog hurled a paving stone at her head and she ducked. He then threw a second which hit her square on with a crack.

"COZY!" Sunbeam screamed as Cozy rolled and went still.

"Oh ho ho! It's you~.." Dog chirped, straightening up and striding towards Sunbeam, who jumped and looked at him. "How you doing, baby girl?"

Sunbeam couldn't even shake and simply stood still as stone. She watched the monster approach with wide eyes. Once he was within arms reach, Dog reached down and hefted her up by the scruff of the neck, gently slipping her helmet off with his other hand.

"Did ya miss me?" He smiled wide, displaying all his fangs. The image of that maw clamping down on Holder's throat flashed in her mind. She clenched her teeth and kicked him in the nose with the horseshoe Cozy had polished. Dog yowled and let her drop, grasping at his face and stumbling back. Looking at her from between his fingers, he growled.

"O-ho-kay! She wanna play rough?" Violently dragging his hand from his bloodied face, and cracking his nose back in place, he snarled. "Let's play rough."

He crouched with a feral sneer and leaned forward to pounce, all his focus plainly on her. Sunbeam took a stance, spread her wings, and braced. Then Dog lunged forward at full speed, claw-like hands poised to tear her apart.

He flew headlong into a flash of red light as Peter teleported in front of him and slammed his wooden stake into Dog's face. The added momentum of Dog's attack caused his body to lurch under Peter's arm, giving him the leverage to slam him to the stones below with enough force to crack them and split Dog's entire skull apart.

Acting quickly, he ripped the stake from the gory mess and punched it into Dog's chest. He hefted his axe up and hacked at where the pulverized skull met the body and buried the axe head into the street. Sunbeam finally let a breath out and took into the sight before her, looking between Dog's corpse and Peter. Unseen by her, Dog's ghost sat up and looked at Peter in shock.

"Fuck you. Didja catch that?" Peter asked, holding an open palm to Dog's body. He conjured a stream of fire that swallowed the vampire's entire body.

---

Comments

[Lunar Strike]

Dang I just read the last chapter and now this? Lovin the characters you’ve got rollin out! Adam and his peeps (while not fleshed out yet, still likin them) look badass!
Can’t wait to see what ya got cookin’!

[ponyreaper1]

Nasty little trick he just learned

[Monk With No Name]

Watch out! Watch out! THE PEOPLE’S ELBOW OUTTA NOWHERE!

[CV816]

"There's one back in Klugetown I've taken a few peaks at. I can us back in the sunlight."

I can get us, also peak should be peek.

[Gormless Wheaton]

11774015
Good catch. Now to delete your comment and discreetly make the corrections and take all the credit.

[Poparakelis]

You kinda suck at fighting dialogues but besides that all is cool

[Destiny Chaser]

You wrote a very good villain with Dog, lots of personality, nicely done.