I think you did rather well. You could have discribed dane's change in detail.

And the guard was a good idea, giving them attention

11817486
Thanks 😁 and also thanks for the advice and leave a thumbs up if you want

11817496
Youre welcome. I don’t want to Sound mean or anything but your punctionation is messed up in the second chapter

11817500
how dare you!! point out something I need to improve on, instead of stroking my ego how rude of you how mean of you jokes aside thanks for putting that out

11817500
Oh and what do you think of my soundtrack selection this time

11817507
I think it fits. Heh, now i get a silly thought about the guards.

And I wonder, did they just took care of dann, or the nation itself?

Solid Redo of Healer reference. Tis an appropriate ending for King Dainn.

And I definitely like the lightning artillery. Not many authors utilize that.

11817509
We talk about magical ponies, there are no silly thoughts here.
And I will explain what happens to the nation in the remastered version

11817514
Well, i thought about the guards's thought during this, like one saying this is for his wife.

Oh? Looking forward to that, hope it wont take too long

11817511
Thanks for noticing, that cursed manga had to be good for something right.

And I'm glad I'm glad you liked the the lightning artillery, I put it in for three reasons, one it is just an awesome concept, two it is practical, and three because I didn't see it anywhere that was a tragedy I wanted to fix.

11817518
Maybe I'll add that, however I will be working on a different story, so it might take a while to get back to this one, sorry

11817536
Sure, better late than never. I actually thought said guards could be distinct in apperence.

But who am i kidding, its your Story after all

11817511
Oh and what do you think of the underground ambush

11817537
Yeah but don't worry, I'm definitely going to revisit this at some point

11817541
Of course. Just thought those guards could be named and look different from the normal onces for better effect

11817542
Yeah that would have been better, I will fix it when I revisit this whenever that may be,🙃 hopefully the other story I'm working on will be enough to make you patient

11817546
Sure. Just thought...could give you a hand with names and such

Friend! I knew that you are still alive and apparently you still haven't lost your touch.

I loved it, very good soundtrack, I don't know how I was lucky enough to have the climax of the melody right at the moment when Celestia turns into a meteorite and when she destroys the doors.

Although I was surprised that the Cabiru had more than shacks with rotten wood and mud, knowing the inefficiency of their lifestyle, but if that were the case it wouldn't have been so much fun, would it?

11817571
Yes I am alive sorry it took so long, this is my first story and I got nervous, and Yeah It wouldn't have been fun If the equestrians We're just attacking mud huts And I'm glad you enjoyed the soundtrack

11817533
I utilized lightning artillery in one of my fics. The Grimdark 6 Volume Two:Broken Beast.

11817539
Not bad at all. I can see RockHoof pulling that off.

Let's not forget he's the biggest jerk of all. Especially on his own does.

11817653
Awesome can't wait to see it when I read it

11817654
I know right, I Really wanted to give Earth Pony Magic it's time to shine, Hopefully I did that

Every single one of those Caribou bastards deserve what karma is about to do to them. I’m surprised that Celestia didn’t straight up nuke the castle.

But I do have one question, is Shining Armor and Cadence ok?

11817999
Why wouldn't they, this is in the past that's why they mean six aren't involved did I not make that clear in the story

11818111

I didn’t know that the story took place in the past because the story did not specify when the story took place. I thought the it took place during the show, because the first chapter was set in the Crystal Empire. And a lot of stories like this takes place during the show so I assumed it would be the same for this one.

Thanks for letting me know.

11818144
Oh then it's my bad, I should have been more clear