Left 4 Dead in Equestria

by Pegasi will rule

Well, that's unexpected...

Chapter 5: Well, that's unexpected...

---

The survivors turned ponies just sat awkwardly in front of the mane 6. Francis rubbed the back of his neck, Louis shuffled his feet, and Zoey rubbed her forelegs together. Sensing the tension had gone on long enough, Twilight took the initiative to break it.

"So... Each one of you should go with somepony else and try to earn your Cutie Marks. We'll decide who we want to help. I think I'll take Louis." Twilight finished standing beside the dark Stallion. He smiled warmly at her and shrugged.

"Works for me." He said happily. Twilight got the tinniest blush on her face and looked to the others.

"Who wants to take Zoey?" She asked. Applejack smiled and nodded.

"Ah will. It'd be good to have another mare on the farm to help with the apple buckin'." She affirmed. Zoey rolled her eyes and walked over to Applejack's side. Twilight smiled and looked at the rest of her friends.

"So, who wants Fran-" Before she could finish, however, Pinkie Pie shot her foreleg into the air.

"Oh, Oh, Oh! Me! ME! I do! I DO!" She shouted. Twilight looked to Francis, who had a look of sheer dread on his face. His ears flattened back and he began to back into a corner as Pinkie giggled and hopped towards him.

"D-Don't I get a say in this?!" He asked frantically. Louis and Zoey laughed and shook their heads.

"C'mon, buddy! Go out and earn your 'Cutie Mark' with Pinkie!" Louis goaded. Pinkie squeed and grabbed Francis' hoof, dragging him out the door.

"Come on! I'll bring you back to the bakery! We can make cupcakes!" She said happily. Francis gulped and his face turned bright red.

"Oh, Jesus! I hope that's not innuendo for something else." He freaked. Pinkie giggled and gave him a wink. Francis gave his pals one last pleading look as he passed the threshold of the exit, never to be seen again.

(well, for the rest of the day, at least.)

"Alright, everypony! Let's get them their Cutie Marks!" Twilight said happily.

Rarity, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash left, since they were too busy to take on the three. Applejack left with Zoey back to the farm, and it was now just Louis and Twilight alone in the Library. She watched as he looked over all her books, smiling brightly.

"Oh, man. You have a lot of books!" He beamed. Twilight smiled and walked up beside him.

"Thank you. So, what did you do back where you're from?" She asked. Louis frowned and picked up a book, surprised his hoof had that kind of dexterity.

"I was an I.T guy." He said with a hint of frustration in his voice. Twilight had no idea what the buck that meant.

"I.T?" She asked. Louis smiled and put the book back.

"Stands for Information Technology. Pretty much my job was morons calling me up, having computer problems, most of the time it was because they didn't know how to turn the damn thing on..." He muttered something else under his breath that Twilight didn't catch.

"Hated your job, huh?" She asked. He nodded and sighed.

"Oh well. Anything you got for work around here is better than what I did where I'm from. I think I'm gonna like it here a lot better." He said happily. Twilight smiled and gave him a hug.

"Whoa." He said with a chuckle. "What was that for?" She smiled and shrugged.

"Glad you're happy. That's all. I wonder how your friends are going to take their Cutie Mark quest." Louis laughed at how Francis was doing and shrugged.

"Zoey? No problem. Francis, however, is going to drive Pinkie up the wall." Twilight giggled and grabbed some books from the shelf.

"I think the reverse is true..."

---

Twilight and Louis couldn't have been more wrong. Not only were Pinkie and Francis getting along, they were actually having a fun time, telling jokes and cooking treats and sweets.

"Man, Pinkie. I can't believe I doubted you. You're pretty cool." He admitted, taking another tray from the oven. Pinkie continued to munch on his treats and smiled.

"Not as cool as your vest! I love vests!" She said happily. Francis' eyes went wide and his heart skipped a beat.

"You... you like my vest?" He asked happily. She giggled and nodded, eating more cupcakes.

"Mhmm. I think it looks good on you. And hey! Did you know, that ummm... YOU MAKE THE BEST CUPCAKES EVER?!" She squealed. Francis rubbed the back of his neck and smiled.

"I... took culinary in High School." He suddenly shot the pink mare a glare. "You tell Louis or Zoey that, I swear to god..." She giggled and began her Pinkie promise.

"Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." She said sincerely, sticking an actual cupcake into her eye. Francis laughed hysterically and wiped a tear away.

"Damn, Pinkie. I... really like you. And I ain't fuckin' with you either. Last girl I liked, I met her from the top of a bridge, and she said she hated my vest!" Pinkie gasped and put a hoof to her mouth. "I know, right?" Francis said disbelievingly. Pinkie got a sultry look on her face and sauntered her way over to Francis.

"Well, I don't hate it... I think it's..." She put a hoof to her chin and leaned in close to his ear. "Sexy..." She whispered. Francis' heart began to beat out of his chest. Okay, so maybe liking a pony isn't so bad when you are one, right?

"Well, Pinkie. If you think it's sexy on me, I bet it'd be a hundred times sexier on your bedroom floor." He chuckled. Pinkie shrugged and walked out of the kitchen, lifting her tail to reveal a flash of pink.

"Well, we won't find that out in the kitchen, will we, silly?" She asked, walking up the stairs. Francis began to think furiously, but found himself involuntarily following her.

"Heh. Always did have it easy with the ladies." He said proudly.

The walk upstairs seemed to take an eternity. His eyes followed Pinkies curves as she danced them in his face, walking up the stairs with exaggerated slowness. They finally made it to her bedroom, which looked like a children's birthday party was going on.

"Uh. What's with all the balloons and shit?" He asked. Pinkie smiled and hopped over to her bed.

"Imma party pony!" She said happily. Francis shook his head and smiled.

"Well, works for me, I guess..." He said. He held back the temptation to tell her he hated balloons, knowing he'd turn his good luck into bad.

Pinkie laid down on her bed, eying him suggestively. "Well? You said it'd look better on my floor. Prove it."

Francis winked and threw the vest off. It drifted lazily to the floor, giving Pinkie a good look at his body. He was definitely in shape; his large forelegs showing he'd been through some serious action in the two weeks he'd been fighting Zombies. Pinkie giggled and pulled him on top of her.

"Haha! I knew I'd be gettin' laid!" He cheered. Pinkie rolled her eyes and planted a big, sloppy smooch on his lips. Francis finally got into it, kissing her back. After a minute the two pulled away and gasped for air.

"Groovy..." Francis said with a smirk. Pinkie giggled and wrapped her hooves around his neck. "Dammit. Everyone laughs whenever I say that." He pouted.

"That's because no pony says that anymore, silly." Pinkie put in. Francis shrugged.

"I still say it. So, where were-"

"Pinkie Pie, we're back!" Mr. Cake called out from downstairs. Pinkie got a look of dread on her face and quickly squirmed off her bed.

"Oh no! I'm not supposed to let stallions into my room! Quick! Climb out the window!" She shouted. Francis raised a brow and grabbed his vest as she pushed him towards the open window.

"Are you kidding mEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" He yelled as she pushed him out, falling two stories into a bush. "Goddamn it..." He muttered, spitting out a few leaves.

Today just wasn't his day...

---

Zoey remained quiet the entire trip back to the farm. She seemed to be preoccupied with something else, but Applejack didn't want to impose by asking to many questions. They entered the farm house to see Big Mac helping Apple Bloom with her homework, and Granny Smith cooking. Apple Bloom looked up and beamed.

"Oh, hiya Applejack! Who's your friend there?" She asked sweetly.

"It's still me. Zoey?" Zoey confirmed. "Your princess just turned me into a pony is all to settle a bet." Apple Bloom 'oo'd' and 'ah'd' at Zoey's new look.

"Whatcha think of her now, Big Mac?" Apple Bloom asked her bother. The stallion looked up and nearly spit out his cup of coffee.

Zoey was beautiful, incredibly so. He had never been stricken by a mare so hard in his life. He looked away and gave a wry smile.

"Eeyup." Was all he could say. Apple Bloom raised a brow.

"Ah... Didn't ask ah yes or no question, Big Mac." She stated. He blushed and looked away.

"Ah... uh... Gotta go plow tha fields." He said, standing to leave.

"It's 6:30 at night, Mac." Applejack shouted to him as he ran out the door. Zoey raised a brow and watched him run.

"What the hell was that about?" She asked. AJ shrugged and shook her head.

"Ah have no idea. He's jumpier than a rabbit on coffee!" Applejack pushed that incident out of her mind and went over to Granny Smith, planting a kiss on her old cheek.

"Oh! Now yew know better than ta sneak up on an old mare like that, deary." She said smiling, kissing AJ's forehead. She turned and studied the new mare quickly and smiled.

"Hello, Zoey. Hope yer hungry for some apple stew!" Granny Smith said happily. Zoey blinked a few times. How in the hell did she know who she was? She was in the other room cooking.

Applejack chuckled and sat at the table. "Oh that Granny Smith. Older than all the apple trees on this land, still as sharp as a tack." She mused.

"Alright, so what is this 'apple bucking', you call it?" Zoey asked. Applejack smiled and gave a long stretch.

"You just go up and kick that tree for all it's worth. Gotta get the apples to fall, put 'em in baskets, and bring 'em back to the barn. Easy as that."

"I have a feeling it won't be that easy." Zoey sighed.

"On your first day? You better be ready to feel tha burn." AJ said with a wink.

"Oh great... why'd I get stuck with you?"

Comments

[Pegasi will rule]

Nice little comedy chapter to lighten the mood. Gave me something to do before bed. Hope you enjoy Francis X Pinkie. Oh, the hilarity in it all

[Pegasi will rule]

1329812 Progression takes time. Don't worry your little head off.

[Hurgusburgus]

I now have the worst mental image of Francis prancing about in a pink apron.

[Paper Crease]

>The second half of the part with Francis

oh god normally i like this kind of stuff but why would you do that

[MyLittleBurger]

If Bill is alive..... I will laugh at what their reactions to him not being dead will be..... What if he was something other than a pony.... say a old griffon....... dragon...... zebra.... granted with his attitude I would say more of a griffon.

[Ivellios]

I laughed when Big Mac said Gotta go plow tha fields.

[joebomo11]

1329766 NEXT CHAPTER MAKE CELESTIA SEE THE DESTRUCTIVE POWERS THAT ARE SPECIAL INFECTED!!!!!!!!!!

[Maverick Huntress]

Francis: The cupcake-baking prancin' show pony!

[Buckshot2825]

Francis and pinkie…
*shivers*

[ByTheNightSky]

I'm glad I grew with the L4D2 characters. There is no way in hell that nick would do this.

.....No. Don't you do it pegasi! I see that look! Don't you...!

[Warrior Kitten]

Aaaaaand now I'm dead. Bye.