Wherever the Light Shines: Part 3

by MLPSolarDash1907

Chapter 3 - Catching up

Starlight stepped out into the castle corridor. The taste of the leftover pancakes she’d finished lingered on her tongue. Normally, she would have savored every bite, but they didn’t have the same taste she always loved. The unicorn looked down the corridor to see a window and the sun was beginning to set.

Might as well get ready for bed... she thought, walking to her left, knowing it was around six in the evening.

She looked around at the cavernous walls and how high they stretched to the ceiling above.

I hadn’t thought of it much... She shivered. But this castle is far too big for only three occupants...

She kept moving, looking down at the crystalline floor at her frowning face. Pathetic. She was so pathetic.

Maybe tomorrow things can really get back to normal... having seen Twilight return earlier that day. Maybe my passion for student counseling can bring me some comfort and joy.

Starlight tried to think of something else, but her mind, as if it were mocking her, made her think of Trixie and Maud. Her face fell, realizing she had been avoiding them ever since her return on the cause of being “sick” and making more excuses for about a week.

Starlight lit up her horn to open a door. She paused and slapped herself.

How much did I depend on this accursed energy called magic? Starlight bitterly thought. It’s high time I cleansed my acts from all things to do with it...

She remembered all the messes she made from trying to make meals, writing, opening and closing doors all without using her magic and yet she was like a filly again with no knowledge of how to function in the world.

Unfortunately, to keep her secret hidden for now, Starlight forced herself to clean up the messes using the very thing that has plagued her life since day one.

Yeah, it should be a real piece of cake not using it anymore, Starlight thought sarcastically. Way to assure yourself, Starlight.

“Starlight?” came a soft voice.

Perking up, Starlight turned to see she had crossed in front of the library’s open door. And inside, levitating several books was Twilight Sparkle.

Forcing a smile, Starlight spoke. “Heeyyy, Twilight.”

The alicorn put her books aside and flew over to Starlight, slightly surprising her until the unicorn was wrapped in a warm hug by her friend. Meekly, Starlight returned it.

“Oh, I’m so relieved and happy to see you again...” Twilight whispered. “I’ve just...”

“It’s okay,” replied Starlight, patting the alicorn’s back.

Suddenly, she felt herself lifted off the ground and Twilight’s forelegs wrapping tighter around her. Starlight barely had enough time to ask until she was sat down on the couch next to Twilight.

“It’s been so long!” said Twilight, “We hadn’t had any time to talk and catch up!”

I keep having to be reminded of what happened recently... Starlight bitterly thought, wanting it all to vanish. It was selfish, but she couldn’t help it.

“My friends and I have tried reaching out to you but every time they gave me a report, they couldn’t get much out of you,” said Twilight. “They’re all worried about you.”

“I appreciate their concern,” Starlight almost bit her tongue, “But I am fine.”

Starlight wasn’t sure if Twilight believed her or not, but she looked away from her to the floor.

“It’s wonderful to see you again,” said Twilight, “I’ve got some of your favorite foods lined up for tomorrow so you can settle in better.”

Starlight slightly smiled, happy at the thought. “Thanks, Twilight.”

“Well, I’m glad that monster that did whatever he did to you is gone now, Starlight,” Twilight boldly stated.

If only I felt that way...

“And he attacked Equestria while we were gone to come and get you,” Twilight glared. “How cowardly and crooked.” She sighed, her look softening as Starlight’s gaze went down to her hooves.

“Well, I’m thankful you did,” said Starlight.

“Of course!” said Twilight, “Why wouldn’t we? You’re our friend.”

Starlight rubbed her hooves together in response, not saying a word. Both ponies stayed silent for a little while.

The words of her mother, father and Twilight herself berating her for her betrayal echoed in her mind. Her heart sank as she realized that they were right. She didn’t deserve any of the kindness she’d been receiving because of her actions.

Everypony will know what I did and tried to do, she thought, remembering Nightfall’s words. Then, she lightly gasped.

Oh, no... Starlight thought, her blood turning into ice. Twilight and I have a bond over magic and if... She didn’t dare to finish that thought.

How would Twilight react to her development? Would Twilight hate her own magic? No, Twilight’s magic is a blessing.

“I’m sorry I’m not very talkative,” said Twilight, causing Starlight to look up at her.

“It’s okay, I’m not either,” replied Starlight, the gnawing sense of dread growing stronger. Starlight didn’t bother bringing up Sunburst, because she knew in her heart that they had not been able to find him. It has been more than a week... What kind of stuff had he seen during that time?

“I’m so sorry, Starlight,” said Twilight.

Oh no, Starlight thought, looking up to see tears filling the alicorn’s eyes, “No, please don’t...”

“I failed you!” Twilight cried. “I should’ve been prepared to help you with whatever you were going through.” She ran a hoof down her face, “With all that’s been going on, I just hadn’t been able to consider my friends!”

“Twilight, this isn’t your fault,” Starlight said.

“Isn’t it?” Twilight’s frown grew.

Starlight grasped Twilight’s hoof, “Please, don’t do this to yourself. You’re under a lot of pressure.” And it wouldn’t matter much to comfort a selfish pony like me...

“Everypony keeps telling me the same thing... but I won’t accept it...” Twilight shook her head. “You were hurting and all I did was fail you...”

“Do you not recall the lessons we learned?” Starlight cupped Twilight’s cheek, “Friendships aren’t defined by success rates but by how much length we go for one another.”

At this, Twilight cracked a small smile. “You’ve learned a lot. I’m so proud of you...”

That was like a knife to Starlight’s heart. And what selfish lengths did I go for myself? Starlight tried to compose herself and not crack in front of Twilight.

“Well, I can say how much I really appreciate your teachings over the years,” said Starlight, the mare inwardly slapping herself.

Twilight pulled back and rubbed the back of her mane. Nervousness pricked at Starlight’s heart. The pony that did so much for her... she was unlike anypony she’d ever met.

Starlight could tell that Twilight wanted something out of her, so maybe, she could give her something to hold over for a while.

“Actually, Twilight,” Starlight frowned, “I have been having vivid nightmares of what happened recently.”

Twilight perked up, the reaction Starlight expected, “Oh, I’m so sorry.”

“Princess Luna has been giving me counseling, but... I just don’t know how these things are going to go away,” Starlight admitting, withholding the part of Luna not checking in nightly.

“You’ve been through a lot,” said Twilight, holding her close, “Is that a reason why you’re avoiding others?”

A reason...

“Y-Yeah,” replied Starlight, “I just... feel like I need some space from everything. I didn’t want to though...” She knew Twilight didn’t fully believe her.

“Just remember everything you’ve learned over the years,” said Twilight, “With friends, you can get through anything.”

“Right,” said Starlight.

“D-Didn’t you say Nightfall had cast a spell on you?” Twilight asked, Starlight could detect an edge of desperation in her tone. The unicorn didn’t answer, unable to form a response.

I’m not so sure if there really was a spell... Starlight thought. All of her actions seemed of her own free will. I am certain there wasn’t one... “Y-Yes...” Why did I answer that?!

But Twilight seemed calmer as she managed to smile again, “Good. You know that we have nothing to worry about. You’re home and you’re no longer under his control anymore.”

“Mm-hmm,” Starlight weakly nodded.

“I’m just trying to help, Starlight,” Twilight’s soft, pleading eyes met Starlight’s, “I don’t want to keep thinking that I failed you as a friend or as the Princess of Friendship.”

“Twilight, you didn’t fail me,” Starlight repeated, “Please don’t beat yourself up for thinking that.” She brought the alicorn in for a hug and patted her back. “For me, please.”

Twilight returned the hug and Starlight felt her relax in her embrace.

“But I can’t still help but think there was more to your reasoning for wanting to go out there,” said Twilight. Starlight pulled back.

Oh, no, I won’t let her go there! Starlight began to inwardly panic.

“And what became of those spells that I had let you try out while in the Crystal Empire?” Twilight asked.

“I don’t know,” Starlight quickly answered, “My time in Oogundaa is a little fuzzy and I don’t remember where I last put those spells.”

“I see,” Twilight said, raising an eyebrow.

“Can we please not talk about that? I swear, there’s a lot I want to forget and yet I can’t,” Starlight said. Way to keep it cool.

Twilight sighed, “Starlight, I’m always here to talk and help you through whatever you need. I can’t help but feel that there is something more that you’re not telling me.”

Starlight sighed. “Well, I assure you, if there were, you’d be the first to know.” As Starlight expected, Twilight’s brows furrowed.

And you don’t need to know what my reasons for going out there were... Starlight thought, inwardly bashing her head over and over.

“Okay,” said Twilight.

She didn’t buy it. She’s just not saying anything.

It was so considerate of her.

“So, we’re getting back to school tomorrow?” Starlight asked, wanting to change the subject.

“Yeah,” replied Twilight, “Finally! And I’m looking forward to giving the students more quizzes and homework!”

Despite feeling unnerved, Starlight playfully rolled her eyes. “That’s so you, Twilight.”

“And what do you mean ‘we’?” Twilight inclined her head.

Snap, she must think I’m not able to do my duties. Starlight thought.

“I would love to go back to my counseling duties,” said Starlight, swallowing her uneasiness. “I’m more than capable of handling it.”

“Are you sure?” Twilight asked, obviously concerned.

Starlight nodded. “Yes. It’s way past time that I got back into the swing of things. It’ll help everything that happened seem like a bad dream.”

“And Luna’s advice has been helping, too?”

Always so thorough, Starlight smiled and nodded. “She’s a real guidance counselor. I might’ve picked up a thing or two from her.” She winked, hating the lie she’d told Twilight.

“I’m still a little unsure...”

“Twilight,” said Starlight, placing a hoof on the alicorn’s shoulder, “I need this. Talking through things helps my mind focus and puts it at ease. Please, just let me carry them out.”

Starlight knew Twilight could be so protective of a strong pony like herself, but the alicorn seemed to be holding back for now.

For now.

“All right,” said Twilight, “But if you need any professional help...”

“I won’t go to therapy!” Starlight snapped, but composed herself, “I-I have everything I need with you and the others.”

Twilight blinked a couple of times, “Okay, but I will be talking with you whenever I need to.”

“S-Sure! Of course!”

Both ponies went silent again.

“And... I heard rumors?” Starlight weakly spoke up. Almost right away, she saw Twilight’s eyes slightly widen but then compose themselves.

“Yeah,” Twilight frowned, “Rumors surrounding me and the Princesses.”

“I just worry about you, Twilight,” said Starlight. Wow, hypocritical much? “I know there have been talks of ponies joining forces in those rumors.”

“Like you said,” Twilight smiled, “We all have enough in one another.”

Starlight forced a giggle.

She’s not admitting it... Starlight thought, I have no doubt that taking in a criminal like me is a part of those rumors...

A yawn escaped from Starlight, soon followed by Twilight.

“Yawns are contagious,” Twilight said with a smile.

“Yeah, I guess I need to get some rest,” said Starlight. “I’ll try whenever I can to get reconnected with the others.”

“Sounds good,” said Twilight.

Starlight got up and began to leave.

“Just remember, Starlight,” said Twilight. Starlight stopped in her tracks. “That we’re all here for you no matter how many times you make a mistake. We love you and want to maintain the bond we have. Just try speaking to us.”

Starlight wanted to reply, but she decided not to. She shot Twilight a small smile and began heading back to her room.

---

Twilight watched her former pupil and wonderful friend walk down the corridor. The alicorn inwardly groaned and felt a pit rise within her stomach.

She’s not okay... she thought. Why in the world did I say yes on her going back to her counseling duties?

Twilight sighed, her mind overwhelmed with everything that happened and getting Mystic into the school. The thoughts of Bullion and his sons went through her mind and...

Cozy Glow... Twilight thought, feeling as if her heart had been jabbed. She shook her head. I’m so sorry I had failed you, Cozy... I will not fail Starlight or the School my friends and I built! Twilight clenched her jaw and hardened her gaze. I have to fix this, I need to!

Author's Note:

I hope all of you are enjoying the story so far. And just so you know, I've based Starlight's behavior off of TheApexSovereign's The Broken Bond a story that I consider one of the best Starlight Glimmer characterizations fanfics on this site. So please consider giving it a read.

And Apex gave me a lot of writing advice that helped me morph and shape my story over time, including giving me notes on how to write Starlight in a situation like this. Wherever he is, I hope he's doing well.

Anywho, leave your thoughts below and go check out that story!

Next time, we check in with Mystic and see how her apology goes with Pinkie.

Comments

[sonicfan05]

Oh Starlight...

I figured that she was both traumatized and felt guilty due to her actions during her time at Oogundaa. Not wanting to use her magic, dodging most of her friends, and now she tried to hide her feelings and problems from Twilight.

It's understandable, but all it does is hurting her further... and her friends too.

Anyway, great chapter! Can't wait for the next one!

[redmar]

Starlight is clearly in denial about several things the biggest being that she really needs therapy.

[StarzGecko]

I think they could had done a better job with Cozy… like yea she befriended a villain to get magic out of Equestria but she could have been treated better to be lead to redemption.

Though the whole Discord using her and the other trio for his means wasn’t great at all ruin his character development of learning friendship which they could had used him to bring the trio to friendship