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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Shorter chapters are usually preferred by most people, I know I hate having to stop halfway through, and have to go back a bit to remind myself what happened. Although I can also read through an entire story of 100k+ in one sitting too....
You have an interesting antagonist faction there, it seems like now mommy Faust had flown the coop, that they think they can get one over on their less experienced daughters. How would they fare if Hena and they cooperated I wonder?
Every single chapter a joy to read, thank you for your amazing text based art shared with everyone reading this fantastic collection of words π
Oh hi Mark.
...Damn I was actually hoping he'd bit the dust, sphinx an all dat.
Anyway; A surprise additional chapter for my collection. Also Featuredπ»
As for this, I agree for as long as they're indeed, satisfactory short chaps. I'd also be willing to be a proofreader.
Hmmm, as for those riddles, a 'hot wind' is another possibility for the first (even though caused by the sun), while 'song/story' works for the second (the personal level keeps it down to one lifetime [would the tablet being studied a story, a memory or both?]), as for the last, 'next time frame' could also work though that might depend on the scale being thought of ...
Sunshine would be my answer.
Shit... I got nothing...
The answer got me laughing, so obvious once I read it!
I got nothing again...
O my God... That is brilliant riddle and a word play as well. Magnificent
11704200
The easy to spot mistakes are typing mistakes and automaic corrections to similar words.
Happend to my work all the time when I use speech to text functions.
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Riddles with more than one answer are even better than one answer only ones.
But apparently insults are just fine
...I somehow doubt that
"Sunlight" I think
"Memory" ....although even that can be lost
I will not try to answer this one, because I accidentally saw the answer on the way back up after writing the previous section of this comment
He's worse than the others because he can actually control himself and he thinks before he acts
Likely yes.
At least one of the financers is probably Celestia and I doubt even this version of her would approve of their methods
As you should be
Wonder if the kids sight will grow with time to see what was , what is , and will could be . Hmmm time will tell.
I like the chapter.
But, a few paragraphs went on for far too long, splitting them up to improve pacing will make the chapter seem more refined than the pseudo-wall-of-text thing you have going on. A paragraph should be four or five sentences maximum.
π
Nice chapter.
And I can agree, BG3 loves to eat away at whatever time you have
Paragraphs like this should be separated by a space to look more like this;
How many more characters until we see more hints of the main cast?
Cubs have got Light Of Other Times Sight?
Seeing what the enemy is going to do next is one thing. Seeing what they have done in the past to get there is something totally different.
Imperator Titans are one thing, being at least relatable ro legged lifeforms, there shodnt be any research into tracked mechanisms because they only have basic wheeled carts so far so no need to carry the road with them?
11704266
This story is over a millennia before from Twilight Sparkle.
Excellent work
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There is more than the mane 6 in the cast. There are several characters in the cast that would be alive at the time. Including a certain bearded wizard and his crew. Hint hint.
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I never would have considered you were referring to the pillars when saying main cast. They had their finale introduction and then appeared maybe 1-2 more times each before disappearing into the ether.
Could be some fun introductions to have Starswirl wander by with his band of misfits in the future.
A foreboding ending, classic. So will Hena place wards & other safety precautions on her cubs because of this encounter?
Also, it was rather brilliant how you subtly compared the ponies actions to those of Nazis & the older organizations that Nazis copied & shaped their methodology from. I knew Equestria was fairly messed up, xenophobic, & blatant with excuse-ism. But I hadn't thought of it in such a way, but it lines up exceedingly well.
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Is that allowed? Shouldn't that break a rule, or something?
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Several thousand years, Luna hasn't even gone Nightmare yet and after that will still be a thousand years.
Pure Line doesn't realize the contract is not bound by magic. Hopefully his organization just assumes it is.
i see pure line fucking that up royally and i see him being food later for what he will do and celly will do something dumb to try and save her ponies in a unfair mind set in favor to the ponies like she tends to do
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Quite a close guess, but not completely; he's too tainted of a 'person' to be considered being given that quick of an end... But there are things far worse, than just being eaten alive . Not spoiling.
11704913
Kind of figured that it's good to know I was close will look forward to the coming chapters
Good to know that this story isn't dead and even better to know your still with us in the land of the living.
I really love this chapter and It's great to finally see the cubs, really liked the new ability you've shown and I look forward to more wholesome moments with the Sphinx-Griffon Family.
Those new guys give me KKK vibes with Nazi Scientists added in the mix, no a good combination. I hope these guys "do a stupid" and get a really pissed of Mama Sphinx on their flanks.
Glad to see that Luna is doing well, also glad to see that Celestia is getting her just desserts. I really wanna see her try to rescue her so called "innocent ponies" from the "Feral Beast of the Pass" and than gets humbled and just before she gets to meet the Grim Reaper she gets her bottom saved by her younger sister, somehow.
I really wanna see a scenario where instead of Luna becoming Nightmare Moon, Equestria gets split into two nations. Luna's nation being more militaristic, constitutional Monarchy but more open to other species and change, like The United Kingdom, while Celestia is more of a "peaceful" Semi-Absolute Monarchy that is bigoted and less likely to change, like The Russian Empire or Qing Dynasty China.
I look forward to reading more future chapters and wish you good health and good luck with your endeavors.
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I guess it is easy to miss, but the zebra says
, hence why sphinx pounces at ten fishes. Hopefully this clears up some confusion.
Pony nazis, fantastic
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Things far worse than being eaten alive? Like being trapped in a library for eternity with no escape? Or using a knowledge-imparting artifact which takes payment and could remove certain fundamental parts of one's self?
Idk, I'm just spitballing here.
Great reading experience.
Though all all your 'excitement' it seemed that you overlook a few typing mistakes. Possibly a wrong word accidentally added to your default auto correction library?
11705973
Well there are plenty of psychological things that can make one beg for it to end or a sweet release of death. Like the "White Room Torture" for one. Looked it up, and it sounds rather terrifying...
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It really shows how creative we are in creating ways to induce pain and despair on our fellow human beings, it is both impressive and terrifying.
Yeah!!, it's back
Great a pony nazi partying just what we needed I say sarcastically.
Great chapter, thanks for the update.