• Member Since 6th Oct, 2013
  • offline last seen Oct 12th, 2022

AfterTheEnd


Not to be confused with BeforeTheStart

E

You never imagined that first contact with aliens would involve a yellow cartoon pegasus, let alone one who spoke perfect English and exhibited intense human emotion. You're simply exhausted, and your pony guest is recovering from quite a bit of crying. Now, as night comes around, you've wandered outside to clear your thoughts. Fluttershy follows, and you share some time together.

A short story which explores an idea I had for the old trope, "unfortunate pony is dumped from Equestria into your house and you bond". Writing this was kind of a practice/experiment that seemed share-worthy. Please enjoy it if you do, but don't take it too seriously.

Quasi-T R I G G E R S: Second person (gasp) directive, distressed Fluttershy (circa Season 2 ish), thoughtful & mysterious Anon

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 1 )

Delicate hoofsteps faded into your awareness.

My only problem with this sentence is the word faded. It momentarily threw me from the scene as, to me, it implies moving away or becoming less as if, in this case, Fluttershy is leaving the area instead of quietly approaching.

Maybe drifted of wafted? Neither is exactly right though. Perhaps: Delicate footsteps gently brushed against your awareness?

Overall, well crafted. Curious to see where this goes.

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