Chosen Apples and Screaming Pearly Lords
“So, what in tarnation is this Choosing Stone Pinkie?” asked Applejack, she and Big Mac sat with Pinkie and Maud on the train headed to the Pie Family Rock Farm.
Pinkie shrugged “I’m not really sure. Mom and Dad told me it’s what helped the Pie Family have health and stable relationships for generations. You put your hoof on it and somehow it guides you to your one true love.”
Big Mac gave a sigh.
Pinkie leaned into Applejack “What’s up with Big Mac?” she whispered. Applejack whispered straight into Pinkie’s ear “He and Sugar Belle broke up recently.”, before Pinkie could gasp and shout AJ put her hoof to Pinkie’s mouth “Let’s not make a ruckus we already got that from Apple Bloom. Big Mac’s sad as it is, I don’t want it any more got it.”, Pinkie nodded and whispered “How? Why? They were so cute together, they were so prefect for each other.”
“I can hear you, you know.”, both mare turned to a slumped Big Mac “We had our prefect moment, but when you reach the peak, all you can go is down.” He sighed again “I don’t regret a second of what happened between me and Sugar, but I think all we really focused on was our love and nothing else. Hearing about Mom and Dad back when Grand Pear came back to town, well, it got me remembering them and, what they had, wasn’t what me and Sugar Belle had, and I think we both knew it. It wouldn’t have lasted.” He gave a sad smile “Sugar Belle will always be my first love, but maybe not my true love.”
Pinkie then jumped off her seat “Then this’ll be great, the Choosing Stone will show you who’s your, and if you find yours in time for Hearth’s Warming then we’ll throw a big party!”
Big Mac chuckled “Yep.”
“Pinkie?” Applejack asked “Why in tarnation did you invite us? I know we’re like distant cousins and all but do you really think this Choosing Stone will work for us?”
“Dad said to Granny Smith it would work.”
“Anyway Pinkie, I’m not really looking for romance, you know I’ve got my work on the farm, same a Big Mac. Winter it may be, but this is the time we make jams, and with Grand Pear here for the holidays we’re starting to try pear jam.”
“Yeah, but if you find your special some-pony you’ll have extra help.”
“I guess.” However, AJ still looked unsure.
By the time the trio made it to the Rock Farm the Pie Family all stood waiting for them. Pinkie rushed up and hugged them all, especially Marble. Without much ceremony and very little word Igneous Rock Pie and Cloudy Quartz escorted the very extend family inside. Applejack scratched her head “I imagined the Choosing Stone was inside a cave or something.”
“In the very beginning,” Igneous said “It was, but thy Grandfather knew something as important needed to be kept safer, so he rebuilt the homestead over it.”
Limestone blinked and hastily asked “Some wait Father, you’re saying the Choosing Stone is right under our hooves?”
“Thou are correct, that is precisely what thy in suggesting.” He pulled a carpet from the floor and revealed a trap door.
Pinkie turned to her mother “Well that explains why your always careful when sweeping around there.”, her mother gave small chuckled and nodded.
Igneous opened the door and almost immediately Pinkie cannonballed into it. Limestone rolled her eyes and she and Maud followed. Marble bit her lip. Big Mac gave her a nudge “Lady’s first.”, she blushed but nodded with a smile and walked through the door. Cloud and Applejack followed closely by the stallions.
The darkness of the basement stopped at the soft purple glow of a large rock with crystalline fragments.
Maud walked up and looked it over for a few second and blankly said, “The Choosing Stone appears to be an incredibly large example of Magically Treated Purple Bertrandite.” She glanced to Pinkie and Applejack “Starlight and I have gotten into discussions of Magically Treated Stones.”, the two Council members nervously glanced to each other before Maud added “Purely for academical reasons.”
Applejack soften slightly “Okay, but how in Celestia does a lump of some magic rock guide you to your soulmate or whatever?”
Maud answered again “This is something me and Starlight have talked with Tree Hugger about. Certain Magically Treated Stone give off vibrations which open the chakras, Purple Bertrandite is a rare and highly desired MTS as it has many properties. It opens to third eye, the heart and throat chakras, allowing brief physic communication, an increase in unconditional love and better communication skills.” She turned to the Choosing “A piece this large has never been discovered elsewhere in Equestria, just standing next to it gives me a sense of awe.” She blinked “Wow.”
Applejack turned to Big Mac and Marble “Did either of you understand that?”
“Nope.”
“Uh-uh.”
Applejack turned to Pinkie “Did you?”, Pinkie passed air through her lips and waved off the question “Course I did. The magic in the rock puts a couple of images in your head of your one true loves, makes falling in love with them easier and gets you talking with them a whole lot easier.”
“Tis true.” Cloudy Quartz said, “As we explained to thy Grandmother Smith, we were betrothed within a fortnight of Igneous Rock Pie touching the Stone.”
Marble blushed, Pinkie went “Aww.”, Limestone raised an eyebrow “Isn’t that a bit fast?”
Igneous shook his head “Thy Mother and I lived close to each other and knew of each other for many years. Pie relationships have been known to be between ponies from across Equestria and even rivals.”
Applejack and Big Mac glanced at each other. Cloud Quartz walked up to the Apple Siblings “Do thou wish to try the Choosing Stone.”
“Well,” Applejack said slightly awkwardly “I think me and Big Mac will wait till your daughters go first, we are your guest after all.”
“Yep.”
Cloud Quartz smiled and nodded.
Limestone trudged up to Maud “I’m the eldest I’ll go first.”
Igneous spoke up harshly “You will all touch the stone together. Mine siblings and I did so as mine Father and mine Aunts and Uncle did, as well as they’re Fathers and Mothers before them. One rock is not superior to the other, they are all of the same earth.”
Pinkie grabbed Marble and practically pushed her to the Choosing Stone. The four stood around it and Pinkie called out the time “On three. One. Two. Three!”, they’re hooves touched in unison. The purple glow increased and filled their eyes, which all widened. Mane and Tails stood on end.
The glow died down. The four took they’re hooves off. Pinkie’s mane and tail went extra puffy and she smiled wildly “Yay!” she yelled and jumped about “I know who me Choosing is! I’m going to throw the biggest party when I find him!” She jumped to each of her sisters “Did get something like what I saw?”, Limestone still in shock just nodded shallowly, Maud answered simply with “Yes.” And unsurprisingly Marble went “Mm-hmmm.”
Pinkie squealed and jumped about “All my sisters are going to meet the one true loves! I’ve never been so excited in my life, well maybe that time when Twilight…” Applejack quickly jammed her hoof into Pinkie’s mouth “Alright Pinkie, you had your, very loud say. I don’t think your family want their eardrums to bleed.”
Maud spoke “We’re used to it.”
“Speak for yourself.” Limestone said passing the Apples to up into the living room.
Marble blushing passed Big Mac without even glancing to him. Big Mac narrowed his eyes and hummed. Applejack turned to notice “What’s the matter Big Mac?”, he shrugged and turned around “I guess Marble was just being friendly with another quiet pony.”
“Wait,” Applejack said taking her hoof from Pinkie’s mouth “You thought Marble might have had a crush on you.”, Big Mac blushed and looked away.
Pinkie went “Aww, that would have been so cute.” She paused “But I guess whatever powers there are in the universe have other ideas.”
Applejack raised an eyebrow “Powers in the universe? Pinkie, I didn’t expect you to go all Silver Enlightenment, that’s what I’s expect the Reverend Farthing to do.”
“I’m not going all Silver Enlightenment. But answer me this Applejack, if there’s no guiding hoof behind the universe, how come bananas are just the right shape and size for your mouth?”
Applejack face-hoofed “Can why hurry this along, me and Big Mac have got work on the farm to do.”
“Yep.”
Pinkie and Maud stepped out the way of the Choosing Stone and the Apple pair walked up to it. Applejack glanced to her brother “Are you sure we should do this?”
“Nope.”, she read his expression “But you want to know if you have a one true love?”
“Yep.”
“Well,” Applejack said turning back to the stone “Only one way to find out.”
“Yep.”
The pair touched the stone. Once again in increased its glow.
Applejack’s eyes widened and she went stiff. A powerful tingle coursed through her. Her sight went black and a couple of images went through her head.
The first what she assumed to be a cutie mark. And an unusual one. First thing of notice being the equines shaped happy and sad masks associated with theatre. However, the two masks got fused at the top to from a cube shape, and at the top a slot with a piece of paper with a x on it being posted into it.
Next a circus tent.
And finally, a Griffon Settlement.
The images went and the feeling of nauseas and an increase of her heart pumping remained, shaking she glanced a Big Mac. He blinked wide-eyed and almost with the thousand-yard stare. Applejack nudged him “You okay big guy?”
Big Mac shook himself and glanced at his sister “Yep.”
“You saw a cutie mark and a location.”, he nodded “Yep.”
“I hope it closer to you. I got a circus tent in Griffon Country.”
Pinkie jumped up beside her “Does that mean you’ll have a Griffin as your Chosen.”, Applejack turned to her with an expression which read “Seriously.” After a second or two she spoke “Pinkie, Griffon can’t get Cutie Marks.”
“A Hippogriff then?”, Applejack considered “Maybe, but I have the feeling it’s a pony.” She turned to Big Mac “How about we go home and discuss this with Granny, Grand Pear and Apple Bloom. I show also tell the girls.”
“Yep. I’m also going to need to check on Cheerilee, that sprain of hers is still play up.” The way he spoke got Applejack to raise an eyebrow.
“Griffon Country?” Apple Bloom asked. Granny Smith and Grand Pear looked equally surprised.
Applejack nodded “I know it a bit sudden, but I got this draw. I don’t know how to describe it.”
Both the elderly ponies chuckled and Granny spoke first “Kind off reminds me of you Ma and Pa.”, Grand Pear nodded “We should be able to handle to work AJ.”
“Actually, I asked around for some help on that.”
A knock came from the door and Apple Bloom opened it and immediately smiled.
Twilight, Flash and Reverend Farthing walked in and started taking off their winter clothing, the Princess explained “Sorry we’re late, but Flash wanted to me to take things slowly in my condition.”
“That’s alright Twilight.” Applejack said, “Thanks for doing this.”
Flash chuckled “When you left Twilight mood went all excited, I should have told you she’s developed a craving for apples.”, Twilight blushed.
Applejack chuckled too “Well, how about that.” She slapped Twilight on the back “Just means that your little trio have got good taste.”
Grand Pear huffed. He then turned to Reverend “Do you know anything about jam making?”
“Well,” Farthing said taking a seat “one of the guest lecturers at Crown’s House was a vicar from the Griffish Isles. He had an orchard, and a traction engine for some reason. I went to his parish as part of my training and he did some jam making for the Summer and Winter Fairs, good stuff too.”
Grand Pear nodded at this.
Applejack looked about the room and nodded herself “If every-pony's okay with this I need to get going.”
Apple Bloom ran up and hugged her sister “Good luck AJ.”, Applejack ruffled her mane “Don’t you worry Sugarcube, I’ll be back before you know it.” She slung her pack on her back, wrapped her scruff around her neck and trotted out the door and towards the station.
Applejack ran her hoof along the map of the tracks. “So, if I take the train to the Crystal Empire. Then exchange for the train going through Rainbow Falls, then over that weird bridge…”
“You mean the Royal Borders Bridge Miss Applejack.”, the farmer turned to the voice.
Lord Blue Moon and his Grandson, Greater Thunder walked up to the platform. The Viscount Boxer tapped the image of the bridge passing over the expanse of the North-East Passage, the icy river which marked the northern border between Equestria and the Griffon Country. “That bridge was designed by my Grandfather, Glittering Iron, the Kingdom Engineer, he built the Equestrian National Railway, and for that he was honoured with the creation of the title Viscount Boxer, Boxer House being the family home.”
“That must have been a feat and a half.” Applejack comment amazed.
Thunder nodded “I’ve read his notes on the task, and the stresses involved.” He cleared his throat and shut his eyes “If ever I go mad I shall have ghost of the opening of the railway walking before me. And when it steps forward, a little swarm of devils in the shape of half-finished stations, sinking embankments, broken screws, unfinished drawings and sketches will quietly lift up my ghost and put him off a little further.”
Applejack tilted her head “That last part seemed a little tame compared to the language before it.”
“Canterlot stiff upper lip.” Said enough, more jovial voice. Applejack turned around as Mr Waterbury and Firelight walked up. Morals paused and turned to the farmer “I hear you’re heading to Griffon Country, as Foreign Sectary it’s my duty to inform you to behave yourself, you know what Griffons are like.”
“I sure do, don’t worry yourself Mr Waterbury, I won’t get into trouble.”
“I’ve that before.” He muttered before turning the Viscount “Can I escort you and your grandson home? We have much to discussed.”
“I believe so.” Lord Blue Moon said and the four of them walked away. Thunder and Firelight behind their relatives and talking to each other.
Applejack turned back to the map and followed the line from the Royal Boarders Bridge to Griffonstone Station. She could tell she did need to the go to Griffonstone. But where to?
A whistle took her attention and Mr Perks called out “Ponyville Station!”
The train pulled in and quickly ran around as Perks called out “This is the non-stop train to the Crystal Empire.”
Applejack took the announcement and quickly boarded. Almost as soon as she sat down the train moved off. Alone in the carriage she pulled out a map Twilight gave her of the Griffon Country.
What Applejack gleaned from info from Twilight’s books on Griffon history. While the throne of Griffonstone was the most powerful and the de facto leader of the Griffon Country, it was quite federal, the land includes dozens of smaller states and fiefdoms and tribal areas. Each with their own leaders, always male, Griffons are a very patrilineal, and they often got into disputes.
For a brief period, the Griffons tried to act in cooperation with each other in a Confederation of these various states, but this feel a part as states wouldn’t pay the Federal Assembly and the government collapsed, King Grover of Griffonstone saw the only way at the time to unite the Griffons was through force, and ultimately through magic.
And now, from what Rainbow, Pinkie and Apple Bloom said, it might be possible the Griffons are slowly reuniting under the Magic of Friendship.
Right now, however AJ needed to find which area of Griffon Country would most likely have a circus, and why would a circus go to the Griffon Country, apart from Gabby, well, Griffons didn’t have much of a sense of humour and Gilda especially seems very unpleasant, at least before Rainbow and Pinkie were sent to Griffonstone by the Map.
As she looked about the regular map she felt her heart react when her hoof landed on the Duchy of Hiss, south of Griffonstone.
Still it would take a good few hours to get to the Crystal Empire and then onto Griffonstone Station, so, Applejack decided to get some sleep. She pulled her Stetson over her eyes and let sleep come naturally, the last thing she wondered ‘How’s Big Mac search for his Chosen going?’ she did have a fairly good idea of who it would be.
Big Mac knocked on the door.
Next-door opened and Cipher poked his head out “Afternoon Big Mac.”
“Afternoon.”
“What brings you down this way?”
“Wanted to talk to Cheerilee.”
“I see.” Cipher helped Riolu onto his back and shut his door “I’m off down to Fluttershy’s, could the two of you keep an eye on my house?”
Big Mac just shrugged “We may be doing something else.”
Cipher raised an eyebrow and took a deep breath, his eyes widened and he blushed “Oh.”
“Maybe it won’t come to that.”
“Not when you live next-door to her it won’t.” Cipher muttered and he turned to walk down the street.
Big Mac frowned in confusion as he watched the Changeling go. Did he really mean what he said?
The door opened and Big Mac turned and looked down. Cheerilee blinked and then smiled slightly “Hi Big Mac.”
“Howdy.”
“I didn’t expect you today. My sprains getting better though.”
“Good to hear.” He glanced around at the snow-covered streets “I don’t suppose I can come in.”
“Of course.” Cheerilee stepped back in “Anything for a friend.” She winked at him. He blinked unsure and walked inside and shut the door behind him.
He looked back to Cheerilee. His mind thought back to how their causal relationship started. They’d been friends in passing since they were foal, he did spare the occasional glance at her in their teenage years, but the two never got a chance a proper to talk to each other, since their occupations were so different and time consuming, Cheerilee begin the one and only teacher in Ponyville and Big Mac, prowling and bucking all day long on Sweet Apple Arches.
The first time they spent time together was on the Hearts and Hooves Day three years earlier. But in truth it was more at the bequest of the Cutie Mark Crusaders. The CMC finding that Cheerilee did not have a “Special Some-pony” for Hearts and Hooves Day set up a date for them both, since Big Mac didn’t have anything to do for the day. And because it had been set up it didn’t go well, they awkwardly chatted, for a moment Cheerilee leaned forward, he wondered if she was going for a kiss, until she said he had something in his teeth.
Later the CMC tried again and apparently, they’d spiked their drinks with a love potion, causing the two to fall deeply in love. And from what the other ponies in town said sappy to the point of annoyance and cringing.
As it turned out the potion was in fact a love poison. Basically, it made them so enamoured with each other.
And yes he knew what that word meant, just because he was a farmer didn’t mean he didn’t know what big words meant, often in his time working on the market stall he’d hear costumers of Rarity use words like it, he would use a dictionary to learn the meaning, often to impress Cheerilee with his vocabulary, she seemed the only pony, other than his family where he would speak more often, and more with her then the Apples since his decision to be a more quiet and listening stallion, of course with talking more he did have the occasional slip into rambling, but somehow Cheerilee liked listening to his stories.
Anyway, where did he get off to? Oh, right Heart and Hooves Day and the love poison, since it caused them to become so dedicated to each other they would have spent every moment of their lives together, so he wouldn’t have worked on the farm and Cheerilee wouldn’t be teaching. Of course, the Apple Family could have found another strong stallion, and Mayor Mare could have sent for a new teacher, but thing wouldn’t have been the same, and well, before he and Cheerilee didn’t wish to subject their friends to their sappy, lovey-dovey talk for decades.
And thankfully Apple Bloom and friends came to the same conclusion and broke the poison’s hold on them. Lesson were learnt and fences were mended, but all the same, both Big Mac and Cheerilee were changed by this experience, they began talking more, spending time together, although he feared maybe the poison was still in their system somewhere.
Cheerilee winced as her hoof hit the ground but she shook it off and opened her mouth.
Immediately both said “Can we talk about something…”, they both stopped and blushed. Big Mac cleared his throat and said, “Ladies first.”
“Charmer.” She bit looked down slightly and tapped her hoof on the ground before nodding a looked up “Macintosh?”
“Yup?”, Cheerilee rarely called him by his proper first name, Big Mac being his nickname. Must be important.
“I’ve been thinking, we’ve been bumping into each other and meeting like this for a while now and I’ve heard townsfolk speculating, I’m not one to believe rumours, as a teacher I prefer to get my facts right. But maybe they’re right and we’re just not seeing it.”
Big Mac narrowed his eyebrows, he understood what she was referring to, he’d heard once or twice ponies saying they acted like a couple, and of course the occasional reference to the disastrous Heart and Hooves Day. Just not seeing it. He sighed “The reason why I’ve been hesitating about going further his because of that love poison, what if we still got it?”
“Big Mac,” Cheerilee said “do you know the full history of Hearts and Hooves Day?”
“Nope. Why?”
“The Earth Pony prince and the Alicorn Princess made amends and they did eventually come to love each other, per the records they were the founders of the Blueblood line.”
“But Rarity said that Prince Blueblood is a Unicorn.”
“Presumably the family married more Unicorns, this would have been in Canterlot remember.”
“I suppose that’s true, so they found love with each other and the poison didn’t come back?”
“As far as I’ve read no. But if you think it could still be a problem I understand. We are only second recorded case of the love poison.”
Big Mac blinked “Recorded? We’re going into the history books because of that embarrassing incident.”
“Twilight’s putting it on the history of the EK, but I did tell her not to use are names.”
Big Mac bang a hoof on the table “Anonymous or not I don’t want to be known for that.”
“And you won’t Twilight made sure to record other events for dozens of ponies in the town. Being Applejack’s brother I’m sure you’ve got a few mentions.”
“What about you?”, she shrugged “I don’t mind one way or another, I just want to live my life, and help educate foals.”
“And what about us?”
She smiled after he asked and looked at him straight in the eyes “I would like, us, but I’m okay to take it slowly for now. We’ve both got important jobs.”
He blushed before saying “If that’s what you want my Candy Apple.”
She giggled, walked up and hugged him “Sugar Bear.”
Looking down at her Big Mac felt pleased, and for lack of a better word loved, not by a good friend, sibling, parent, grandparent or any blood relation, but a love all to himself. He leaned down and whispered into his ear “Of course, if you want we can go further.” He felt her stir and then whispered as well “I’d like that.” He felt her nuzzled his body and rub her hooves over him. He moaned as a hoof ran over his abdomen.
She hummed “Well, aren’t you a fit one.”
He shrugged “I do my best.” He looked at her again then leaned in. Lips met. Unlike with Sugar Belle he went rough and she moaned into him and hugged him closer. They kissed again, and again, and again, chained together by small gasps of air. Macintosh stopped mid-kiss and placed his hooves on her sides.
Cheerilee brought a hoof to Macintosh's face, bringing him in for one more kiss. “Come with me.” She pleaded and grabbed his hoof in hers.
Big Mac followed as she dragged him up the stairs. Carefully, she backed into her room, using her hooves to feel for the mattress. She found it and sat down still locked together in a kiss.
Applejack stood on the platform of Hiss Station and stared at the poster for of all thing Banger’s Circus. Carol Banger went around during the Everfree Festival looking for acts, so apparently her Chosen got involved in this, who they were with a Cutie Mark like theirs they had to be a performer. She looked over the acts, amazingly enough Trixie appeared in the top billings, apparently whatever Starlight taught her payed off.
In the middle of the poster one name caught her attention, the Cutie Mark she got shown floated above it, the name made her raise an eyebrow though so much so she read it out load “Screaming Lord Sutch? What kind of parent calls their son Screaming?” She shook her head and followed the directions to the tent, the Big Top.
The stallion operated the Steam Organ looked vaguely familiar, maybe she saw him at the Everfree Festival. Anyway, she bought a ticket and entered. As the only pony in an audience of Griffons she went straight to the back, and at such a high place she couldn’t really see much.
First a mare came in on a sort of seat on one wheel with pedals, she heard the term unicycle, but it went over her head. Still, the way this mare managed to balance so many things at once truly astounded the eyes.
Next Trixie appeared in a puff of smoke and of course did her grandiose egoistical outburst. The Griffons seemed impressed.
Other acts came and went, including the two acts she and Fluttershy helped in Las Pegasus. Also, other animal acts, like trained elephants and lions. Although the lions seemed a bit tame, the tamer stuck out his chair cracked his whip but the lions just sat.
Then in came the clowns. Having seen her fair number of Rodeo Clowns she didn’t think much of this lot. Arriving in a cart much too small for them, which slowly began to fall apart. Mucking about with whitewash and balloon in their baggy pants. None of the Griffons even tittered.
Finally, the Ringer Master, Carol Banger herself walked out and projected her voice “Ladies and Gentle-Eagles. We now present to you one of Trottingham’s greatest entertainers. The one and only Screaming Lord Sutch!”
Applejack quickly looked up and took this information in “He’s from Trottingham?”
Music started playing, the song seemed cheerful alright, the word sunshine just fitted.
The curtains parted. Applejack’s eyes widen. Out into the ring stepped an Earth Pony, with a dark drown coat, bright sky-blue eyes, so bright she could see them from all the up where see sat, and a green mane and tail with more creamer green highlight. The most striking part, his costume, he looked almost as silly as the clowns, black tailcoat with waistcoat and bowler hat, not so bad, but they were cover in white dots, some of them is shapes like horseshoes, bells and play card symbols, hearts, clubs, spades and diamonds. Applejack just sighed ‘He’s going to die, just like the clowns.’
Sutch adjusted his cuffs and softly spoke “Good evening all.”, Applejack blinked, she knew a Trottingham accents, after hearing Sassy Saddles and Pipsqueak, and Sutch here did have it, but it seemed rougher, like the Trottingham equivalent to her accents when compared to the others in Ponyville.
Sutch continued “First I’d like to thank Miss Banger for allowing me to work here. And I’d also like to thank the Parliament in Buckminster for upping the Election Deposit to five-hundred bits, and the less than five percent of voters who made it necessary for me to work.”
The Griffons collectively chuckled. Applejack looked around at them, then back to Sutch as he continued “I’m very grateful to be here, because it’s true that success breeds success then I’m on the pill.”, another larger laugh.
“Now,” Sutch said “I admire Griffon Country, at least you stay within your lands.” He pointed to himself “We, in the Griffish Isle, no a chance.”, there came some knowing laughs “We tried to build an Empire, we stole countries, we stole countries with the cunning use of flags.” Titters continued.
“Sail across the sea and stick a flag in the ground, ‘I claim the Foalland Island for Trottingham.’ And the Native Penguins are going ‘You can’t claim us, we live here! About fifty-thousands of us.’ And we said to them ‘Do you have a flag?’, and they replied, ‘We don’t need a flag it’s our country you twit.’ And we said, ‘No flag, no country, you can’t have one, those are the rules I just made up.’ And that was it, wasn’t it?” The laugher grew as Sutch finished with this bit. He then sniffed and looked about then leaned in “You know, I’ve got a friend who won’t each cheese. You know why? Because it’s got bacteria.” A few more titters.
“It’s got bacteria in it because that’s the whole point of cheese. It’s milk that’s gone off big time! Yet me friend eats bread and drinks cider. I’ve told him the yeast they make bread is a fugus, and alcohol is made by something called fermentation, which in simple term mean ‘You left that fruit sitting around for how long?’”
Applejack burst out laughing, it brought memories, especially the Apple Blight fiasco. In the corner of her eyes she saw a couple of Griffons looking at her, and Sutch himself looking at her with a smirk, it suited him, he winked and then looked back to the curtains and shouted “Nurse! She’s out of bed again!”, she started laughing again ‘If that his reaction to my laugh, what’s he going to say about Pinkie?’
After the show ended Applejack went searching around the back of the tent, where all the coloured carts stood. She turned a corner and saw a conversation, Carol Banger talking with the Lion Tamer “Look Leo, those lions need to be fierce.”
“I’m sorry Miss Banger, they love me too much.”
Applejack chuckled as Miss Banger shook her head and turned away, and nearly bumped into Applejack “Oh sorry miss, wait you’re Applejack?”
“Yep, that’s me.”
Carol bowed politely “What brings you all the way out here?”
“Well,” Applejack rubbed the back of her head “it’s hard to explain, but I need to talk with that Screaming Lord Sutch?”
“He’s packing up his things in tent over there.”
“Packing?”
“This was our last stop on the Griffon Lands Tour, and he was only with us for it. He’s one of the few comedians who can make an audience of Griffons laugh.”
“I saw. Thanks very much.” She walked over to the tent. A simple brown tent with a simple board with the word ‘Sutch. Do Not Disturb.’ Applejack lifted the flap and found him without his costume on and his back to her. But, she still gauged his size, slightly above average, maybe an inch or two short then Flash and Moonlight Spectre.
A small breeze caught his tail and his head bounced. He turned around and looked down at her, he smirked a tilted his head “You’re that pony in audience, sorry if I offended you.”
“Think nothing of it Mister, I’m Applejack.”
“Sutch.” He bowed.
“I thought it was Screaming Lord Sutch?”
“That’s just my stage name, by it on a performance stage or the political.” He turned around and closed the trunk he’d been packing before sitting on it “What can I do you for?”
“Well, kind of hard to explain, specially to a stranger.”
“Then don’t be such a stranger, as we in the Pearlies say “One Never Knows.””
“What’s the Pearlies?”
“I guess someone outside of Trottingham wouldn’t know. If you want we can head down the station and I’ll tell you.” He slung the trunk onto his back.
“I think I’d better explain myself too.”
Applejack explained about Ponyville and Sweet Apple Arches, but she didn’t go into the Choosing Stone just yet.
Most of the time from the Circus to the station and in fact some of the train journey was spend by Sutch explaining himself and his work, his life’s calling.
He was born in Buckminster itself, might be the political capital of the Griffish Isles, but a lot of poverty existed in the local area. His great-grandfather, born a pauper himself, and rose through the ranks to become a Costermonger King, a successful market stall trader, he decided to become an entertainer and raise money for charities.
He made a costume by sowing mother of pearl buttons to an old suit of his and perform in the streets and at fairs and carnivals. So, successful in fact, dozens of charities asked for his help, so many he himself needed help, his colleague Costermongers helped by doing the same and thus Twenty-Eight Pearly Kings and Queens appeared in Trottingham, one for every Borough of the East End, included the City of Buckminster, which his family were the Pearly Royal Family for, his elder brother was the current Pearly King and Sutch himself a Pearly Prince.
“So,” Applejack said scratching her head “What was all that about politics.”
“About five years ago I started a joke party to poke fun at Trottingham’s political system.”
“Party?” What did parties have to do with politics?
“Political Parties, I’ve got no idea why they call themselves parties but that’s what their called. A group of ponies with the same ideas. They send member to represent areas of the isles in government. Trouble is most keep to the idea of what the party wants, not what the ponies living those areas want. And of these politicians could run a whelk stall to save their lives.”
“So, you’re making fun of them?”
“Yes, as leader of the Official Monster Raving Looney Party. It also gives us Pearlies some publicity in hopes it get more ponies to give to charity.”
“But,” Applejack looked at his trunk “what about your stand-up?”
“That, it’s to raise money for charity work, seventy-five percent of the money I get from the gigs go to the Pearly coffers.” He sighed “Trouble is, all this travelling about, I just want a place to call home.”
“Haven’t you got Buckminster?”
“Not since me house burnt down. Anyway, in Trottingham I’m always Screaming Lord Sutch, I can’t be anything else.”
“Sounds like what you need is a holiday.”
“You’re telling me.”
“You can stay with me and my family in Sweet Apple Arches.”, he looked up “You’re joking, right?”
“Nope.” She held out her hoof “Just like you Pearlies, I’m giving you what you need.”, he took her hoof and looked straight at her “Thanks.”, they spent the rest of the journey just in each other company.
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It's still good to see a new chapter.
8268127
I'm trying to work out what the next one might be. But I've got other projects on the back burner. Like I've published a new chapter on one of my Fanfiction stories.
8268182 That's okay. Take all the time you need.
Okay, the Cheerimac scene was a tad suggestive, but the scenes with AJ and Dutch felt a bit more natural. By the way, you wouldn't happen to watch BGT, would you? Does the name Daliso Chaponda ring a bell?
Sorry, I haven't commented in a while. I've been busy.
8299429
I haven't heard of BGT and the name doesn't ring any bells.
I do admit I did initial intend to write a proper lemon between them, but I remembered about the rating.
Also I think you need to edit your comment, you've put Dutch, not Sutch.