Not really good at art. I do programming however
A 1st person story of an unexpected visit to Equestria.
Is everything really as it seems? Is the answer to life really so complicated as people make it out to be?
Follow me into the world of Equestria, and experience the pony world from a 1st person perspective.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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The meaning of life is Twilight Sparkle!
857477
Proven fact! (She even was Number 42!)
BTFF:
Since it's the first fanfic you wrote I'll try to give some advices instead of rating down:
First things first: As you may noted while reading other fanfics, it's common to write in past tense instead of letting everything happen in the present.
One may think that this isn't that important, but gosh! This was so odd to read.
Also, a great improvement for this would be a co-reader.
Errors like: "There is no sounds." and "I look up and sees a rainbow-colored pony" can be killed easily with a doupled eye-count.
Last but not least maybe a little style-trolling:
"I hear a -snap- like a stick breaking" IMO, it would be better to break such direct actions in several parts, like:
'Snap'
A sound suddenly reached my ear, equal to those caused by breaking sticks.
Not the best too, but you got the idea.. ( I wonder what people will say when I will finally release my fic, if someone will read it at least)
I want to give a link to you that is great for improving writing-skills:
Oh darling, be a dear and klick me please! (Writing-World.com)
So far..
keep writing! This has potential inside!
# 42 in Read it and Weep,the 42nd episode.
Well, is anyone interested in me continuing the story?
860375 I are!!!!!
861976 Excellent, then I shall keep writing
861991 When will you upload it?!
978177 I've had a mixture of a writers block, and simple vacation. I have written some, but just not enough to upload yet
978766 -L-
To those few actually following the story, I updated it with another chapter :P Hope you like it.
At first I was like:
Then I was like:
nice story, a little bit rushed but still realy nice