I did, in fact, prefer Mister Miyagi, but I kept that to myself.
Discord is probably not the world's best teacher, but I will say this here and now: His lessons helped me get over the stumbling block that kept me from using spells. The most hilarious thing about it? He taught me by using basic logic.
Like I said earlier, magic users are seperated into Instinctive and Instructives. But the thing is, everyone is an instinctive at their core. Key among the instincts is the survival instinct: Instinctives immediately start casting magic when in danger, even if they've never used magic before. Following that logic, I should have been casting magic like crazy the moment the queen tried to kill me. The fact that I had not meant that something was getting in the way. Actually, it was two somethings. One was me, and the other was the body I was inhabiting.
Tirek, from how Discord described him, was a magic stealing asshat who seemed to get a kick out of destroying things. He was greedy, ruthless, and violent. In fact, he was pretty much flat out evil. His body, and the instincts that came with it, were conditioned to respond to his kind of mindset. I was, in all honesty, the absolute opposite of Tirek. Thus, my mind and instincts were unable to trigger my current body's magical instincts, and would never do so on accident, unless I did something drastically out of character.
That was a little disheartening. "So," I asked, after Discord's short explanation, "the fastest way I can begin to use magic is by thinking and acting like an asshole?"
Discord burst out laughing, and didn't stop for several minutes. I should have expected that reaction, given what I was beginning to understand about his relationship, such as it was, with Lord Tirek. When he finally regained control of himself, he wiped a mirthful tear from his eye and said, "I wouldn't have put it quite like that, but that is one option. I wouldn't recommend it, though."
"Obviously," I agreed with a chuckle. "But I take it that there's another option?"
Nodding, the embodiment of chaos said, "Oh yes. The thing is, you currently occupy Tirek's body. The magic inside is currently set at 'Tirek', rather than 'Conrad', which is why an accidental activation is almost impossible. However, at its core, magic is not a thing of the body, but of the mind and spirit, both of which are yours. So, there is a way to tap into your body's magic, but it will be a little tricky."
Raising an eyebrow, I asked, "How do I do it?"
A half-smile upon his face, Discord said, "You just have to tap into your 'self'." At my confused expression, he explained, "Well, unicorns awaken their magic when they find their special talent. While you might not be a unicorn, the principle is the same for you as it is for other magical creatures. Magic responds when you realize who you really are inside. All you really need to do is find your special talent, the thing that makes you... who you are, and you'll awaken your magical powers."
------------------------------------------
Flint and the troops were not having a good night.
Sombra, on the other hoof, was having a blast. Using his dark powers to oppress the crystal ponies had been a constant struggle, since their innate nature, that of love and hope, was constantly at odds with his powers of hate and fear. It had required ceaseless control and manipulation to keep his slaves under his control. Too little, and his slaves might break free; too much, and he might crush their fragile psyches completely. The perfect balance had been almost impossible to maintain, yet under his supervision, it had been achieved.
Here, however, he could really let loose. The ponies of the Equestrian army had a score to settle with these... changelings. While unfamiliar with these beings, Sombra didn't need to know much about them. All he needed to do was to pump the soldiers with enough hatred that they'd stampede into the hive in a raging fury. The attack would make for a perfect distraction.
He just wished that it wouldn't take so long. At his full strength, this would be the work of seconds. Instead, since he had to husband his resources very carefully, it would take hours yet for his power to fully infect the soldiers. At this rate, he'd not be able to let his new minions loose until sunrise. And even then, they'd be less slavish underlings who would obey his every whim, and more a rampaging mob that would only obey a single command...
Oh well, one cannot have everything one wants... at least, not yet.
-------------------------------------------
It should not be this difficult to figure out who you are, deep down.
Seriously, ponies manage to find out who they truly are when they get their mark, which typically happens at an age of five. Reflect, for just a moment, on how obscenely absurd that is: Ponies reach a state of self-actualization at the age of five, without exception, although some take slightly longer than others. Worse, once reached, they almost never fall from that state. Most humans are lucky to attain self actualization in their lifetime, and it is rare for one to maintain it for the rest of their lives.
I suppose that was the trade-off they had to make in exchange for not having thumbs. A pity that humanity was not given that choice. 'Hey, which would you rather have: An extra digit that allows you to do more stuff than the average animal, or complete and perfect knowledge from preadolescence onwards regarding exactly what it is you're put on earth to do?' Screw thumbs, I'd pick the second option, even if it meant having a pink fluffy unicorn dancing on a rainbow branded permanently upon my hip. Wouldn't you?
So, while Discord left to take care of whatever assignment he'd been given (He'd stated that the mission was classified, and the princesses would be miffed if he'd disclosed the details to me), I sat down and tried to figure out just what my 'special talent' would be.
Meditation isn't exactly my specialty, but I decided that a little self-contemplation might be just the thing to set my magic off.
Who was I, really? Twenty-six years ago, I was born to two loving parents, Conner and Madelyn Conrad. Yes, my name is Conrad Conrad. What were you expecting it to be? My birth was unremarkable, no problems or complications. I'm given to understand I learned to crawl, walk, and speak within the expected time frames for an ordinary child. Asides from an early obsession with building blocks, I wasn't that special.
Ah, I felt a little twitch there. Why was that?
Continuing on, I reflected on my school life. Above average grades, I was put into a gifted and talented program... up until I realized that 'Gifted and Talented' actually meant 'You Are Forced To Do Extra Work, On Top Of What You Are Already Given', at which point I, through the use of shenanigans that I'd rather go too much into right now, made myself ineligible for the program. Heh, they never did figure out how I managed to trick that circus elephant into sitting on the gazebo. Ah, but I digress...
Look, my free time was precious to me, alright? Homework already took up to much of my valuable time, time that I could have used building Lego sets...
Ah, there was that tingle again. Maybe I was on to something there.
In high school, I found my calling when, as part of a class project, I was asked to build a bridge out of uncooked spaghetti noodles. To get a passing grade, the bridge had to hold at least five pounds. An A required a weight of fifteen pounds. I was having so much fun with it that I ended up going a bit overboard: My bridge was so solidly constructed that the teacher, a man weighing three hundred pounds, could stand on it, and even hop up and down on it, without the bridge doing more than creak a little bit. It ultimately broke at six hundred pounds of pressure, but it got me an A plus with extra credit. That was when I knew what I wanted to be.
The tingling became a trembling...
I'm not a wrecker. I'm not an annihilator, or a ravager, or a destroyer. I don't break things, I make things.
The trembling became a rumble...
It might not have been 'sexy', being a structural engineer, but it was something that could pay the bills, and then some. When I finished earning my masters, I could design just about anything. After The Lego Movie came out, the Trifecta started calling me Emmett, partly because of how much I loved to play with the toys in question, but mostly because I kinda looked like a human version of Mister Brickowski. I didn't mind.
The rumbling became a roar...
When I graduated from college, I knew, without a doubt, exactly what I was.
Above my head, a golden ball of fire appeared, and a beam of light shot up into the sky...
I'm a Master Builder...
In the sky above the hive, a series of images appeared, combined with a very familiar song.
Yeah, I was pretty sure that I'd never be able to call out anyone on copyright infringement ever again...
When the song finally finished, I heard someone behind me say, "Again!"
I turned around, and was startled to see Skyflower, as well as the entire hive, behind me, with expectant looks upon their faces. They might not look it, but those bugs could be ninjas when they wanted to be, and Sky was no slouch herself.
I shrugged, then started focusing. I needed the practice, and I doubted that Warner Bros was about to complain: I'd bough the DVD, after all, complete with special bonus features, and if I'd had it, with a tv and dvd player, I wouldn't have minded showing my new bride and my subjects the entire movie. In fact, I didn't need that now: I was like a magical movie projector, with the sky as my movie screen. So... why not show them the whole thing?
And that was why the hive, my wife, and I ended up staying up until midnight, watching The Lego Movie.
---------------------------------
Twilight Sparkle woke up suddenly, to the sound of Pinkie Pie singing and dancing along to a strange series of images and sounds that were suddenly being broadcast across the sky. Within a few minutes, she was hooked, as were all of her friends...
----------------------------------
King Sombra almost lost his hold on the Equestrian soldiers that he'd been corrupting, when an overwhelmingly powerful burst of pure positive energy roared through the surrounding area. It had almost possessed enough power to finish what the Crystal Heart had started...
Admittedly, it was a catchy tune, and the plotline of the story that played across the sky was... interesting, even if it possessed an overwhelmingly positive message.
----------------------------------
Luna would normally have been upset by the sudden interruption of the night she had crafted for the citizens of Equestria, but after a few minutes of watching, she was just as engrossed as anybuggy in the hive...
----------------------------------
Discord chuckled as he sat down, watching the sky with a bucket of popcorn. He knew that Conrad had it in him. It was just a matter of pointing him in the right direction...
NEW CHAPTER UP!!!
Sorry it's so short. Next one will be longer, promise!
Holy shit, you update often AND have an awesome story.
That is a rare thing, bravo.
this chapter is AWESOME
keep up the good work as always
You just HAD to get that fuckin' song stuck in my head right before I fall asleep, didn't you?
5518193 Thank you friend! It's short but great!
YES! THE LEGO MOVIE!
Yesssss! Let's see some more copyright infringement!
5518217
Well, let's see if we can reset your internal radio:
Everything is awesome when you're part of conrad's hive!!!
I actually found it funny that Sombra enjoys Lego Movie.
Legos..... pure win.
5518193 this is still great.
5518193 My friend, You are a fucking mad genius
Maybe short
But dang is it AWESOME BRO
5518242
I feel it would be weirder if he didn't
5518233 nope. Now I've got both stuck in my head.
Best part yet
Always gets me laughing in some way, thanks.
jajajajajajajajajajja BEST CHAPTER EVEEEEEEER ajajajajajajajajaaja 10/10
I don't care who or what you are you have to like lego movie in some way
inspired by hail to the king
Am I the only one who didn't like the Lego movie (rather thought it was too overrated)
Dude.. for sure that what happened here made up for the shortness. This was fuckin' epic.
Conrad is gonna build his new city with his subjects! Awesomeness!!
His destiny is to be Flufflepuff??
Yours is the only story out of 223 favorites that has updated this week. Congrats.
I'm so enjoying this...you sir are awesome. Been worrying I would run out of stories to read -as I read a LOT- and yet this helps quite a bit in keeping me from going nuts waiting for other stories to update. As such thanks man...keep up the great work!
Also if our new Tirek is able to make constructs out of magical lego bricks...well that would be pretty rad.
Conrad, the new element of awesome and creativity. Beware for innovation is coming.
Personally, I find the idea of Pinkie Pie singing and dancing to Everything Is Awesome to be the most adorable mental image ever.
Everything is awesome!
Excellently done story. ^^
And everything was made better, if even by the slightest bit, by The Lego Movie. Magic at the hands of humans, ladies and gentlemen.
Dude, Conrad, how much pasta did you use on that bridge? Each pillar must've been three packages worth, the beams two each, and the cost of both it and the glue would've made any non-government school bankrupt. Unless the project was sponsored by food and stationery companies, that works too.
And your work was severely underrated. You were supposed to have gotten at the very least an SS rank according to Dash and Dante's Academy of Awesomeness.
5518329
The world record holder for a spaghetti bridge held 443.58kg, in spite of weighing less than one kg itself. Conrad's was pretty good for a beginner's project.
I officially love you right now.
5518349 Ah. I was thinking of a more conventional, "actually bridge-shaped" bridge, if that makes sense.
EDIT: Pretty good? It was over half the goddamn world record!
YES! LEGOS!
Man I had tens of thousands of those. Still have about half.
Every time I read a chapter I can't help but smile or laugh. You have a gift my friend.
So, how long until he tris casting Ultima, and makes something go boom?
5518217
DESCRIBE THE TEXTURE OF THEIR MAGICAL FUR
5518372
SMILES!!!
I can imagine Twilight and the gang walking in on Conrad and the hive singing that song.
5518357
Yay! Now if only a lady would say that irl.
...I made myself feel sad.
*watches Lego Movie*
HAPPY AGAIN!!!
Whoo hoo! PFUDOR reference! The Lego Movie reference! And everyone was impressed when images from the movie started to appear in the sky.
You go, Conrad! EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!
5518288 233 faves? wow I have you BEAT 4000+ on my faves
5518422 reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/problem.gif
5518435 about 77 percent though are done and complete
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ll3oeqQXbe1qbvaudo1_500.gif 5518437
Sure thing, man.
I want to see Conrad using the thunder series spells on Sombra
And I don't mean thunder, thundara and thundaga
I mean Thunder,Elthunder, Arc thunder and Thoron
5518390 >tfw nobody will ever love you I'm getting off the internet and going to sleep now
Bucking, WHERE did you found such changeling song? It's awesome!!!
I think I'm unfollowing.
It was fun (and even witty) several chapters ago, but now... it's just a mess.
*jumps off boat*