“well you certainly handled that,” Dawn said looking at her sister. “And how in the world are you friends with an Alicorn!” Dawn said with disbelief
“yeah, yeah i know,” Dash replied
After about an hour of sitting around…
“Um, I was wondering if i could visit my coltfriend and my little colt? I don’t live too far from here.” Dawn said looking at a far off house “Sure,” Dash said smiling “I want to meet my sister’s family after all I need a…” Dash’s eyes widen as the memories of Scootaloo came flowing back to her, She placed a hoof on her head. “um nevermind about that last part, but I still want to meet them” Dash said face towards the cloud they were standing on. As they left the house.
“Lead the way,” dash said looking up at her sister. “Keep up with me than” Dawn said as she launched herself from the cloud at amazing speed that nopony even Rainbow dash could match
At Tinted Dawns Old House...
“I’M HOME!” Rainbow Dawn shouted as he closed the door behind him, after a hard day at flight school.
“I’m in the kitchen!” Unknown Photo called back “We are in the kitchen” A female voice called out
Suddenly a knock came from the door “I got it,” Rainbow Dawn yelled
As he opened the door to see who it was, he just stood there with wide eyes and a huge smile on his face
“MOMMY!” the little colt cried out leaping up to hug his lost mother
“I love you too hun, um could you let me go I need some oxygen now” Dawn said
The colt lept of his mother then hugged her leg as she walked in.
“Unknown?” Dawn said. With no reply she asked rainbow dawn “Where’s dad?”
“Last I heard, the kitchen.” Rainbow Dawn replied as his mother walked to the kitchen
She just stood there mouth agape as she saw her coltfriend hugging another mare.
“you little mothe...” she stops before she continues the sentence, so she doesn’t curse around Rainbow Dawn.
Unknown Photo Looked up seeing her standing there. “t-t-this isn't what you think.” The Colt said Shaking in fear
“Rainbow Dash, now!” Dawn yelled In tears, as the door broke down and the cyan and rainbow mare Stepped in in a blood stained Lab jacket.
Rainbow Dawn hid from the cyan mare behind her mother “Its alright My little colt she won't hurt us, but as for your father and his new marefriend” she looked at the cowering couple
She began to sing “In the Rainbow factory where your fears and horrors come true, In the rainbow factory where not a single soul gets through” She than lets out a cackle as Rainbow Dash drags the two pegasi out the door in chains. The colt whimpers at this new side of his mother running to his room locking the door, Then starts to cry.
As Dawn Cools her jets she realises what she has done and breaks down crying.
15 minutes later…
“Dawn?!” Rainbow Dash said running over to her sister “What? Whats wrong?”
“I-I-I Just hurt Rainbow Dawn…” She said standing up Looking up at Rainbow, with a tear stained face
“I'll go get him…” Rainbow said “Which room is his?”, “Last door on the left…” Dawn replied
Down the hall at the last door on the left…
“Rainbow? Rainbow Dawn?” Dash said knocking at the door
“Go away!, I don’t want to talk to anyone right now!” He Said sharply
“But don't you want to meet your aunt?” Rainbow Dash said in a caring tone
“ I don't have an aunt! just go away…” He said back to her
“I'm your aunt, silly. Now open this door so i can hug you and make sure you're safe,” she said sternly to him
He considered it then trotted up to the door unlocking it. His ears laid flat against his head as he saw the Cyan mare (Still in the lab coat).
“I’m sorry you had to see that by the way. Anyway as i said i am your aunt, and if you payed attention in school that would make me your mother's sister.” she said kindly “Oh and you and your mom are living with me but you will also have to work on weekends got it?” she said sternly
“Ye-ye-yes mam,” he said shakily, while saluting with his left wing
“Good, now your mother need a hug from you,” dash said looking down the hall where Dawn was , still crying...
5293356 Correction Done
5293356 Awesome! This is such a great story!
5294839 So glad you think so. having put together each chapter together in an hour and a half each + minimal editing. that means allot 4 me
Chapters are short, description of a Rainbow Factory fic is beyond typical...and Tinted Dawn feels like a self-insert.
T-that was... awful. I t-think I h-have cancer now...
Well i'm sorry Windlife,
I'm still a young writer and have a lot to learn. And I take some comments seriously like yours , and i know how you feel as well. All i need is a dislike than i know i need to fix it. Plus I said it needs some revising. I could keep listing the stuff i need to work on but like i said, a dislike shows that you need something better and i will try.
And plz dont mention cancer... its not funny for me . Plz and thank you
5513933
Can you possibly say my name in mail so it's not out on the internet plz and thank you blue stripe
and here have a stash
P.s I deleted ur comment b/c No real name on Fim:fiction just in one-on-one mail or irl talk plz sarry.
>>Windlife
You shouldn't be so mean. I may just know Tinted a little through her works, but thats still no excuse to be so mean. You remind me of the Baka-san that are Flim and Flam