Rainbow Dash was late. Pruning the apple trees had been messier than she thought. She didn’t normally spend much time on her mane, but with that many twigs and bits of bark and grass in it, she had needed more than her usual quick cloud bath. She had done the only sensible, logical thing she could think of: gone to the Luxury Lotus Spa. It had been a time saving measure, nothing more. She definitely wasn’t trying to look good for Twilight; they weren’t even dating yet.
Dating. Dash pondered whether or not they would be dating after tonight or if they had to actually go on a date before that applied. Rarity would know, probably Fluttershy too. Whatever. They were going on a date, sometime. If asked, she would say, “Yeah, I’m dating Twilight.” She felt a sort of giddy tightness in her chest, a warmth that made her want to shout and cheer, a fluttering that made her want to scream and run.
She was not nervous. Twilight’s question rang through her mind again. The tone, the normal, utterly Twilight way she had been asked out. It– It didn’t intimidate her, not Rainbow Dash. It was just so utterly cool. She’d have to be equally awesome about the whole thing. No stammers—not that she’d do that—no hesitation. Rainbow Dash wouldn’t be caught dead hesitating. Like the first bend on the sprint track, she’d just have to go for it.
She twirled around in a barrel roll before landing in front of Sugar Cube Corner. Faint music thudded through the wall; it sounded like Pinkie’s party was in full swing. Well, it was her fault for being so late. An idea formed in her head, bringing a smirk to her face. She’d heard this song before. It was dance music and if she timed it right... Now!
Ignoring the ‘closed’ sign on the door, she burst into the bakery, rearing back and spreading her wings. All eyes turned towards her and mouths fell open in mute astonishment as the bass dropped. She’d timed it perfectly: her hooves clopped down on the floor a beat before the drums resumed. Perfect.
It took Pinkie less than three seconds to recover before she zipped over to welcome Dash to the party. “Oh my gosh, Rainbow Dash! That was amazingly superriffic awesome timing! Sometimes when I try to...”
Dash let Pinkie’s torrent of words wash over her. It wasn’t so much that she ignored her pink friend, but her mind had made a sort of Pinkie filter that let her concentrate on the core of what the party pony was saying without having to listen to the individual words. She made some polite assurances—yes she was okay, yeah she knew she was late, yes butterscotch ice cream was an awesome flavor—but she was paying even less attention than usual. She hoped she wasn’t agreeing to be covered in pancake batter or to fly a chocolate fountain in from Canterlot or something annoying like that.
She stared past Pinkie, her eyes fixing on Twilight, her soon-to-be girlfriend. That tingling was spreading. It seemed to encompass her entire body and she found herself fighting back the urge to giggle and rush over to Twilight. So uncool. The unicorn’s horn glowed softly and the music stopped.
“Oh, right! Now it’s time for marshmallows!” Pinkie sang as she shot off towards the kitchen, freeing Dash to walk into the room proper and the presence of her other friends.
“Rainbow darling, what have you done with your mane?” Of course Rarity would focus on Dash’s hair.
Applejack chuckled as she walked up next to the pegasus. “Yeah, RD. What’d you get all gussied up for?” AJ’s knee dug into her flank, just under her wing. “You clean up nice.”
“Oh. Thanks guys. Sorry I’m late, I had a lot of washing up to do–” she shot the orange earth pony a narrow-eyed glare– “after I helped a certain somepony with her farm chores.”
“It looks lovely. Um, did you go to the–” Fluttershy glanced down at her hooves, as though embarrassed to have spoken. “Oh, never mind.”
Twilight’s voice commanded Dash’s attention. She’d never noticed before, but Twilight’s voice always seemed to be on the verge of laughing. “Well, I think it looks lovely.” Twilight smiled at her.
Wow. Rainbow hadn’t realized how intense a smile could be when it came from the pony you were about to go out with. It was like somepony was leaning against her. She was glad her wings were still in flight position from her entrance or things might have gotten a bit awkward. Not that she was nervous about Twilight. She just didn’t want things to get weird.
“Whatever you did, it looks great on you.” Twilight’s complement washed over her. That tingling was getting warmer. Rainbow reminded herself to focus on cool, she didn’t want to be that pony who spent all her time blushing. No way, that wasn’t her.
Low enough only Dash could hope to hear her, Applejack whispered, “Close your mouth Dash, you’ll swallow a bug.”
She snapped her muzzle shut. Had she been that out of it? When had it gotten so warm in here?
“Well my dear,” Rarity said as she flicked her own mane’s curl, “I can only say that I approve wholeheartedly of this new dedication to your appearance. I’ve always said you could be absolutely stunning if you’d just take a little more time to properly care for your coat.”
“Yeah, yeah. Look, this was a special occasion,” Rainbow said. Ignoring AJ’s hissed “I bet,” she continued, “I just didn’t want to look like I flew through a bush and then lost a fight with a dust devil.” She folded her wings back down to her side. “I’ve got to set a good example for my fans, after all.” Twilight wasn’t the only pony who could play things cool.
She turned towards Twilight, who suddenly seemed less like a fluffy cumulus and more like a thunderhead. “Sooo...” she began. She tried to swallow but her mouth was dry. She’d have to remember to hydrate more when helping Applejack next time. “Twilight. Um, that thing we talked about earlier?”
“Oh?” Twilight brightened.
Dash’s heart seemed to seize as Twilight tilted her head a bit to the side and smiled. She had to be cool. Focus on cool.
“Did you come to a decision?”
She needed to be cool. She needed to have style. Absolutely smooth. “Buh-huh.” She gave herself a mental kick and started over. “I mean, yeah, I did.” She straightened her legs and tilted her chin up slightly. She closed her eyes and said, “Yes.”
“Yes?”
“Yeah.” Dash relaxed and flashed her best smile at Twilight.
“Um, Twilight? Rainbow Dash?” Fluttershy’s soft voice wavered. “What are you talking about? That is, if you don’t mind telling us.” Dash’s face fell as she realized that she had forgotten her other friends were present.
Before Dash could reveal Twilight’s great love for her and the awesome time they were going to have together, dating, Twilight did that thing again. Where she just told everypony. It was kinda annoying, and she didn’t have the proper flair for delivery, but it was also really cool the way she just said it. Rainbow had never given the egghead much credit in the nerves department but today she was almost as fearless as the Rainbow Dash.
“Oh, I asked Rainbow Dash to go on a date with me as part of–”
“And I totally just said yes!” Dash pressed herself up against Twilight. She was not going to be outdone by Twilight. Maybe Twilight didn’t want everypony to know how awesome she was, but that wasn’t how she flew. She would just have to do the delivering for both of them. Dash threw a hoof into the air, her grin fighting with her eyes for room on her face. “You’re looking at Ponyville’s newest, most awesomest couple!”
Pinkie Pie gasped dramatically, drowning out the sounds of shock Rarity and Fluttershy made. “Ohmygosh you guys! That’s soooo great! I’m gonna have to throw you a party!” She popped up between Twilight and Dash, almost yanking them off their hooves with the ferocity of her sudden hug. The party pony’s smile was as wide as only Pinkie Pie could make it. “Wait!” She released both of them and they almost fell to the floor, catching themselves at the last moment. “We’re at a party! Time to redecorate.” With a gust of displaced air, she vanished as quickly as she had appeared.
Rarity was doing her own passable Pinkie Pie imitation. Her grin widened until it seemed to take over her face. She was almost a blur as she danced from hoof to hoof. The thin, shrill, noise she was making, like metal being sheared off, grew louder by the second.
In contrast, Fluttershy was very still. The smile on her face was like that of a teacher as their prized student received their degree. Her eyes seemed to light up and shimmer with their own, soft light. While her gaze encompassed both of them, Rainbow felt like she was the pony bearing the brunt of this gentle congratulation. “I’m so happy for you two.”
Applejack glanced towards Rarity and then shook her head. “Congratulations Twilight, Rainbow. I hope things work out for you.” She smirked at Dash. “‘Cause I don’t wanna hear RD’s bellyaching if it don’t.”
“Oh Applejack, you shouldn’t tease about such things–” Fluttershy’s worried admonishment was cut short by Rarity as the fashionista and number one romantic of the group finally processed the information.
“A date!” she exclaimed. “Oh you simply must let me help you pick out dresses, I don’t suppose I have time to make you new ones, but I’m sure I have something in the shop that will go just perfectly with wherever it is you two will be going.” Like Pinkie before her, she wormed between the two and gave both of them spine-shattering hugs. “Oh yes, I have just the thing, a quiet lilac number with an elegantly worked saddle and a full set of cream shoes, unless, of course, you want to stand out more. I’ve got a striking green saddle and blanket with the perfect cut to make a dashing entrance. It even has a matching bridle if you’re feeling exceptionally bold, Twilight. And for you, Rainbow my dear, a...” Rarity continued to spout possible fashion choices to no pony in particular. By this time both Dash’s and Twilight’s faces were darkening due to the lack of oxygen.
“Rar–i–ty!” gasped Rainbow Dash.
“Can’t– Breathe–” Twilight choked out.
Rarity abruptly released the two struggling ponies, letting them fall to a heap. “Oh my dears, I’m simply mortified. I do apologize, but it’s so exciting, being here at the beginning of such a grand romance!”
Dash clambered to her hooves and, after a second’s thought, helped Twilight regain hers. “We’re just going out, Rarity. It’s not like we’re moving in together.”
“I know dears, and I’m sorry for overreacting, but it’s just–” Rarity brought a hoof to her forehead, her horn alighting and dragging a nearby bench into position behind her. In her best drama-queen voice, she wailed “the best possible thing!” as she fell back onto the bench.
“All done!” Pinkie Pie chirped from behind the group, causing them all to jump a little. Every single balloon and streamer, every place setting, every cupcake and donut in the bakery had been replaced with blue and purple paired versions and were adorned with, or were even in the shape of, tiny hearts. The banner, which had originally read “Congratulations on Avoiding a Broken Wing Although That Didn’t Turn Out So Bad Last Time Did It?” now proclaimed that this was the Rainbow Sparkle and Twilight Dash celebration party. “Now let’s kick this party into gear!” Pinkie chomped a hapless cupcake as the music started back up. “Hey, this is really good!”
Rarity cleared her throat loudly. She had to raise her voice to be heard over the driving bass of Pinkie’s typical party music. “So, when is this date of yours going to be?”
Dash turned to Twilight and poked her in the flank. “Yeah. Where’re you gonna take me, huh? Are you taking me to dinner? Oh, how about a show? I hear there’s some totally radical ones that came out recently.”
Twilight Sparkle blushed. Twilight Sparkle, the pony who was always ready with contingencies and lists, stammered. “Actually Rainbow, I, um, haven’t quite gotten that far yet. This whole plan is still in its early stages. I guess I may have put my cart first a bit, but I was so excited to get things started.”
“Twi–light!” Both Rarity and Dash whined in unison, the latter with an exaggerated pout and the former with a wide-eyed look of distress.
Twilight nervously chuckled. “Uh, sorry?” She grinned sheepishly at them. A bead of sweat trickled down her cheek as she leaned away from those faces. “I’ll um, I’ll have something by– by tomorrow?” she asked.
Rainbow Dash led Twilight Sparkle, her new girlfriend, out onto the dance floor. She felt good, excited, like she was perched on top of Dead Mare’s Drop, the freefall training course in Cloudsdale. She was looking down, following the waypoints to the bottom. It was a long way to fall though she’d have plenty of time to pull out if stuff got too heavy. But right now, perched safely on a fluffy wisp of cumulus, she could picture herself riding the course all the way to the bottom.
Pinkie was right, these cupcakes were really awesome.
Twilight stumbled as she nearly tripped over her front step. The moon was hidden behind thick cloud cover—the weather schedule called for an early downpour in the morning. Even though it was obscured, she could guess that “in the morning” was not very far off.
As she quietly eased her front door open, hoping to not wake Spike, she marveled again at Rainbow’s enthusiasm for this project of hers. The mare had certainly seemed excited about her plans. Perhaps she should have made clear that this wasn’t supposed to be a secret, but Rainbow seemed so very thrilled about their friends’ reactions. She’d never seen the pegasus display such raw magnetism except when she was performing stunts. Dash was a much better actress than she had given her credit for.
Twilight eased her door closed, using her magic to silence the hinges. Dash was a really good actress. Twilight had thought that her portrayal of Commander Hurricane had just been a case of being given a role that suited her personality, but now she was having second thoughts. If she hadn’t known better, she would have thought that Rainbow and her were actually going out. For a moment she remembered Rainbow nuzzling her neck again and she felt her cheeks growing warm. A much better actress.
Maybe it was Dash’s playful nature, and her wanting to use this opportunity to play a little prank on their friends. Twilight felt it was only fair she go along with Dash’s plans; the pegasus was doing her a great favor. But still, it would be nice to have been told. She had nearly given away the whole thing! She chalked it up to the playful mare’s spontaneous nature.
She crept up the stairs, wincing at every creak and groan the old staircase gave off. In Canterlot, the floors had been stone and she still had not gotten used to the idea that her home would betray her presence. The rustle of the leaves when a breeze blew was as familiar to her now as the howling of the wind around a stone corner had been, but the way everything creaked underhoof was an entirely different matter. Tonight, the floorboards seemed especially loud. Perhaps Rainbow Dash’s performance had gotten to her a little bit?
As she entered her bedroom, the room she shared with Spike, she realized she needn’t have worried. While the noises of her newest home still occasionally awakened her, Spike had never once stirred.
She cast a longing glance at her bed. A string of late nights and early mornings spent on her spells and List were taking their toll. It had been worth it; it always was. But she couldn’t sleep yet. She had promised Rainbow Dash and Rarity a plan on the morrow and she would have no peace until she had something to show them. Ignoring her bed, she plodded over to her desk and levitated out a fresh sheet of paper.
Perhaps Rainbow’s idea of a play was the ideal first date. She had connections in Canterlot, so tickets shouldn’t be that hard to come by. She’d have to get Spike to send a letter inquiring after them first thing in the morning. She wrote down “Night at the Marequis”.
It certainly was anticlimactic. She had sat down with the expectation that she would be hard at work as the sun began to crest the horizon. It was almost jarring to think that it was this simple. Maybe this dating thing was easier than she had always assumed.
She turned towards her bed, but she was no longer ready to surrender to sleep. The unprecedented speed with which she had finished her task had reinvigorated her. She found her mind wandering to the nebulous future play. Shaking her head, she cleared away the images of Rainbow in her gala dress. She needed something to help settle her mind.
Books, of course. Or rather, some very specific books. She walked over to a bookshelf. Unlike its larger cousins, this shelf housed her own, personal books and those she had checked out of her own library. She knew just the book she wanted too: Daring Do and the Cave of Dreadful Diamonds. Her horn glowed as she gently pulled the well-worn book from its spot on her shelf. With a slight effort of will, she lit the candle next to her bed.
It was funny how much she liked these books. The plots weren’t particularly innovative on the first reading, let alone the tenth. The descriptions and the prose were no better than average, but for some reason she kept returning to this series. She had tried other novels written under the same pen name, but none of the other books or characters had the same life as Daring did. Her sense of humor, her confidence, her never-say-die attitude, these were present in perfect measure and Twilight couldn’t help but be fond of the plucky pegasus.
Twilight cleared her mind of all literary criticism. She liked these books and she wasn’t about to let herself over-analyze her own preference for them all night long. She resolved to read no more than three or four chapters and then get to sleep. She had a busy day tomorrow.
The room was filled with the small sounds of her house: the rustling leaves, the creaking walls, Spike’s light snoring, and the occasional sound of a page being turned. The candle burned lower as Twilight lost herself within the story. She stopped after the promised four chapters, placing the book on her nightstand. She settled into bed and snuffed the candle with a thought. Pulling her blanket up, she closed her eyes.
Twilight was trapped in a dark cave, having been taken captive by the shamanistic lizardmen who would only trade her back in return for power over the moon. The dimwitted reptiles hadn’t counted on the adventuresome explorer and doer of daring deeds, Doctor Do.
She could see the pegasus, shrouded in shadow, as she out-flew, out-thought, and out-dared her opponents until at last the brave explorer could approach Twilight. As the pegasus stepped into the light, Twilight was surprised to note that her coat, rather than a warm tan, was the same color as the sky. Tufts of hair poked out from beneath the domed cap she wore, a full spectrum of color instead of multiple shades of gray. Her rose-colored irises met Twilight’s eyes and all concern vanished.
As she dreamed of her rescue at the hooves of Equestria’s number one doer of dangerous deeds, Twilight hugged her pillow with all four legs. The unicorn’s mouth turned up in a dopey grin as she drooled on her mattress.
This story is flippin' marvellous. Kits writes in a style that evokes images all the time; so many little scenes that are easy to visualize because they're show-close in how they're written. Both Twilight and Rainbow Dash hit all the key points, and one particular scene later in the story just presses all my buttons with regards to characterization.
I've watched this story take shape, so I'm obviously slightly biased, but I will be the first to tell you: read this. If you like TwiDash? Read it. If you generally like shipping, but you're not convinced 'bout TwiDash? Read it. If you don't like shipping? I've no idea why you clicked the link here, but read it.
So. Much. Cuteness. A little hot, too! I may be in love with Rainbow Dash now.
471675
>implying you didn't love her before
But seriously, thanks for the help you've given me. Even if you think it wasn't a lot, this wouldn't exist in anything like its current form without you.
472775
Might I inquire as to why it is not? Is it the pairing? I'm actually a huge fan of myself. Is it >shipping? Or is it the setup? I don't want to spoil the ending, so I'll shut up and just let you answer.
472823
I hope you enjoy! TwiDash is probably my second fav pairing now-a-days. It shot up after Building Bridges and Read it and Weep, knocking AppleDash aside. I really just like shipping Dash with her friends.
this is awesome and twilight better not hurt dash.
>See this added to twiDash group
>Looks at Approval Rate
"Well this sounds promising-"
>kits wrote it
I MUST READ THIS!
Sorry, had to post that, will actually review later when I read it.
473117
Nothing against your work. generally I'm jsut not much for paring because it happens, ALL THE TIME. I have liked some and very few. but like i said. while this story is great, I just don't like the shipping basis much.
the one thing I'm worried about is that this is going to go into the classic cliche of 'you thought it was a real relationship?' and Dash is going to get hurt...if you end up doing that, it'd be wise to do it in a very unique way because it's too overused
473136
Spoilers :x
473183
I have fans
Thanks for the support!
473139
473189
Certainly! It is actually refreshing to talk to someone who doesn't like shipping and is mature about it. Thanks! You Might like Storm. It's not Shippy at all and written in a similar 3rd person limited PoV. But, being almost a YEAR OLD now (holy ****nuggets) is quite a bit rougher in places than this.
I actually started this fic for a contest back in Feb. (I missed the deadline by 38000 words and 2 months. Hah) I know a lot of TwiDash has come out since then, but that isn't going to stop me from posting my own.
Oh god how did I not fav/thumbs up this before.
*fixt*
473117
Yes, implying at any point that you don't love Rainbow Dash should be considered a grievous offense.
Perpetrators must be severely punished!
TWENTY SMACKS WITH A WET POOL NOODLE!
473207
Spoilers. I can note you if you wish to know before deciding to read the next 37000 words.
473240
Thanks!
473259
Twilight should be adorkable. And Dash should be whatever the sporty version of that is? (hot? I dunno. I find her so.)
473360
Lol. When it first went up, I had two thumbs up and 11 faves. I was very confused.
473366
I'm 90% sure that any ship that involves Pinkie is amazing.
PinkieDash is my favorite pairing, but when you get ideas, you gotta roll with them. If you don't mind clop, check out End of a Rainbow. It's been called "sweet and funny" by some.
473396 nah I'll wait it out. just saying that that particular path for this kind of story is a rather overused one.
473396
I realized after I posted that I read it whilst it was still on gdocs, Cloudy had pointed me at it, heh X3
473454
Haha
Well, THIS one is edited
Hence it being only 3 chapters instead of all 12
473499
Sounds like a good reason to read it again, soon! X3
hmm, this is indeed a peculiar proposition. Then again so are most situations where communication - and lack thereof - malfunctions big time.
I love the detail you put into each little bit of description. All the little points that make it come to like, all of which I am seriously envious of you about and that I can only wish I could pick up on your knack for detail and making it spring to life. I've been trying to pull it off myself where I can but I fall flat.
My biggest question is though, with that last bit about Twilight imagining Dash as Daring Do, is Twilight actually going to develop feelings for Rainbow because Rainbow is taking it like a legit relationship or is she really just going by her objective?
Don't Answer!
Looking forward to what comes next, obviously.
Oh god. In during the best TwiDash.
This is delightful! Kits, where have you been all this time?! Why have I not come across you before?! I have the stupidest smile on my face, and people are looking at me weirdly in the lecture theater. Apparently political theory shouldn't make people go 'dawww'. Funny that.
Seriously, this is a lot of fun, and you have a really commendable style. I have become far more picky with the ship fics I read, but this one has me hooked! I really can't wait for the next update.
Keep up the great work! I'm gonna go check out some more of your stuff, haha. Any suggestions?
I am so very excited to see this posted!
473710
(comment has been noted. any answers have been explicitly removed) Thanks though. I usually have a really vivid, fully animated with voice acting and sound effects image of what's going on. That first scene where she stalks her table... If I could animate, I would make that a thing.
473759
/me blushes. I hope it lives up to your expectations
473878
Well. After I published Storm (which would be the one I'd recommend if a darkish/sadish thing is good with you) I got involved in Phoe's New Artist Training Ground event and went from talentless hack to almost good. Then I got brought onto EqD's pre-reading staff because they needed more people. Storm hitting 6star and the help I gave Cupcakes with Nocturne got me an in. Between art and pre-reading and starting the mlp-wtg on deviantart, I had no time for writing.
Then I pre-read Building Bridges, offered to buy Cloudy's booze, and we hit it off. I spent a lot of time helping friends get their ideas up. I actually have several fics I've never got past rough draft of part one. Trying to use the same WTG prompt that Rainbow Dash's Best Plan Ever used made me hit writer's block so hard, I ended up writing End of a Rainbow (clop).
I don't have anything else near this long:
Read Goddammit Pinkie Pie, it will take around 1 minute. But only if you can afford to laugh.
If you like show-style CMC, I'm told I did a good job on Chancing Canterlot. Probably the weakest of my fics.
If you want a darker, less bouncy mane-6 centric fic that did real well around a year ago, check out Storm. No, Dash does not lose her wings or die.
End of a Rainbow is my attempt to write clop. I didn't bother futzing around with a story to critique, it's just Pinkie and Dashie having fun. It's been called "sweet and funny"
Featherfall is primarily Scootaloo learns to fly from Dash. But I have a twist planned for it. This fic just killed all my time.
That and the twins that are being born in <6 weeks
OH! There is a fic, written by one "Tittyhawk" called "The Great and Powerful Ship" that is trolling 2nd person clop so hard people seem to LIKE it. I TOTALLY DIDN'T WRITE IT.
<.<
>.>
- Kittyhawk out
473958 Goddammit Pinkie Pie is hilarious. Best 400 words I've read in a long time, haha. I'm definitely going to check out Storm as soon as I can, too. It is 6 star, after all.
And helping Cloudy with anything is a perfectly reasonable use of time! Haha
This is adorkably brilliant, and reinvigorates shipping with plenty of awww yeahhh.
474061
Wait for the super secret epilogue to be posted in a different story thread. It'll get a rise out of you.
Ooooo Featured now
Congrats!
-
Usually these stories go with Twi actually finally getting into the relationship, followed by Dash finding the truth or the lists, betrayal feelings of sorts occur, while Twi will have to prove herself to Dash... (Or maybe I have no idea what I'm saying)
ANYWAYS
Thank cloudy skies for leading me here
Awaiting moar
Adorkable Twilight causing confusion. I can't find anything to dislike.
474104
>Usually these stories go with Twi actually finally getting into the relationship, followed by Dash finding the truth or the lists, betrayal feelings of sorts occur, while Twi will have to prove herself to Dash
You are correct. That is the trope.
>i.imgur.com/iIrEj.png
I haven't read the story yet (Will in a second) but just wanted to point out that I read the title as Twilight's Lust (Same with the pic).
That is all.
I don't think I'm the only one who knows where this is going and is perfectly okay with it.
"Rainbow Dash led Twilight Sparkle, her new girlfriend, out onto the dance floor."
I believe it should say "Rainbow Dash led Twilight Sparkle, her new marefriend, out onto the dance floor."
474124
That is also a fic I am writing. In fact the full title is "Twilight's Lust: One Letter Makes all the Difference"
474129 see 474122
I need to stop getting distracted. i opened this 5 hours ago.
Just finished chapter 1.
Good work so far.
The characterization in this story is both enduring, hilarious, and brilliant! My goodness, Bravo kits!! BRAVO!! Easily the best representation of the characters I've seen yet in any relationship based fanfic. I'm in awe at your ability to capture these mares personalities in an enjoyable and believable way that hasn't been seen in the show yet.
Personal favorites? Rainbow Dash getting flushed over Twilight's Ice water nerves, no, like, cold ice water nerves (so obvious it in retrospect but this is the only fanfic I've seen point something like that out, and you did it so well), and then Rarity's fangirly reaction to her two friends dating. So funny! You made my night.
I wish I could offer some constructive criticism in return for sharing this work with us, but you've struck me stupid. You really only have yourself to blame for this.
I like the canon-inity of this shipfic. Scystorm tells me this'll dethrone me, or something along those lines, and depending on where it goes I don't think I'd mind too much.
I wish I had
the daring do episodeall of season 2 to go off of when I wrote474122
Ehhheheheh, well it'll be fun to see how you flesh it out
Part of the fun of reading these is seeing how writers take classic scenarios and put their own flair on it
474241
I dunno about dethroning, but it's definitely a worthy match.
Just read 1 through 3, was so awesome. If there's something I love in a story it's how close the characters are portrayed to the characters on the show. And I'd say you hit it right on the mark. It was those things like Twilight's orderly perspective and Dash's brash and spontaneous perspective that get me and really make the story for me. Applejack seems more mocking and teasing to me but I could put that down as her competitive attitude with Rainbow Dash.
Chapter 3 Fluttershy. . . DAWWW
474145
Me Gusta
473245 "I actually started this fic for a contest back in Feb. (I missed the deadline by 38000 words and 2 months. Hah) I know a lot of TwiDash has come out since then actually started this for a contest back in Feb. (I missed the deadline by 36000 words and 2 months. Hah). I know a lot of TwiDash has come out since then, but I'm not giving up on it just because it got popular while my slow-plot tried to finish this story."
Sweetie Bot has detected an error.
Suggested Action: Initiate repair protocols.
I see this little experiment in romance is going to end up going much further than Twilight expected, though she doesn't quite realize it yet...
And now...we wait for moar.
Oh no, Oh No, no, mo!
Dash thinks its real, Twilight thinks Dash is playing around! Pore Rainbow!!! this will not end well!!
Love this story, The writing is top quality , and the plot is fantastic!
474413 1-Poor Rainbow
2-RAINBOW NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
3-WHY TWILIGHT WWWWWHHHYYYYYYY
Why the buck did I read the title as "Twilight's Lust"?
I don't know what everyone here is so worried about. I, for one, think it's going to end just fine with no hurt feelings at all.
Ooh...this could end in heartbreak. I don't see a "sad" tag, but it definitely could...
....
*tracked*
let's hope my craptop can handle fimf comments!
474225
Thanks! Characterization is the number one thing I care about usually. It's made me love some less than stellar writing and has sunk great writing. It's one of those things you run into with >fanfiction a lot more than original fiction.
I had a lot of fun imagining how Rarity would ever react if two of her friends showed the slightest bit of romantic interest in each other. Fangirling out is the only reaction that makes sense to me.
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Well, I didn't seek out to dethrone anyone. I mean, Twilight's quill is blue because I saw someone make a comment about how Twi having one of Dash's feather is a unique thing to TwiDash (*snrk*) so I had to. Cloudy appreciated it I think.
But yes, Read it and Weep (and Lesson Zero to a much lesser extent) really helped bring this together.
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I hope you like my take!
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Well, more like her approach to dating. I think if she thought this was supposed to be >romance, she'd be petrified.
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I see AJ's relationship with Dash as really good friends who constantly try to annoy eachother. Dash pranks AJ and AJ pushes Dash's buttons when she can. But yeah, it's meant to be friendly ribbing, not HAHA U R TEH SUCK
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I may be my writing style. One critique (ok, like the _only_ critique) I received on Storm was that thought's were presented both directly and indirectly. This fic has no direct thoughts. No "I wonder what Twilight is doing?" Dash thought. The closest is teh occasional time when the ponies talk out loud. I try to let their thoughts color the narration instead of presenting them directly. It's essentially a very limited 3rd person PoV that is a step back from most.
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Yeah. AJ just can't let Dash off w/o some teasing.
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I want to respond. But >spoilers.
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Blueberry muffins :3
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Kittyhawk has thrown a Concurrent Modification Exception
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See >spoilers. But, it is tagged >romance.
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I hope to have at least one more chapter by tonight. The whole story is written, just not edited.
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Sssh! That's the spinoff!
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Hahawat
Another story where the Mane 6 are gay as fuck.
Congrats on making the featured box!
This is lovely. Here is the part where I will say I'm not usually keen on TwiDash blah blah excusecakes, but really, I think I'm not keen on BAD TwiDash. I mean, sure, I've got my preferred ships and all, but I think it really is a quality thing. (Kinda like the folks who keep saying, "I don't really like romances, but I liked this!" I wonder if they in actuality just don't like poorly written romances ... but I am digressing.)
The thing I like the best about this so far, the thing that's really making it work for me, is Rainbow Dash's goofball enthusiasm for the idea of dating Twilight. It's adorable and, though it initially took me by surprise, it seems very in-character to me. Reminds me of "Over a Barrel" ... she took a bit to come around to the cause of the buffalo, but once she did, she was 110% and aggressively defending the cause. And here, she takes a bit to process the idea of dating Twilight, but once she comes to the decision "Yes, I will date Twilight," she is ALL. FOR. IT. Zero to sixty, in ten seconds flat. So very, very Dash.
Rainbow Dash led Twilight Sparkle, her new girlfriend, out onto the dance floor.
They haven't even gone on a date yet, and Rainbow's thinking of Twilight as her girlfriend. That's hilarious and adorable. And it makes me think these two really are suited to one another--they're both going about this in an utterly ridiculous, socially inept way, just from opposite ends of the social ineptness spectrum. I cannot wait to read about these two actually going on that date.
And of course it's making us all worry, as WE know what Dash does not regarding Twilight asking her out. But then we got that lovely little bit with Twi at the end of chapter 3, her reimagining of Daring Do, and ... I think it'll all be okay, in the end. "The course of true love never did run smooth ..."
On a mostly unrelated sidenote, I LOVED that Twilight put "Pinkie Sense" under both the pros and the cons on Pinkie's list. That was very, very funny. Also, Twilight was entirely right to do so.
i love this story
and how twidash a good example of the opposites attract kind of couples
Well, looks like the scientific nature of 'completing the List' is starting to take a more...romantic turn.
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oops missed this one the first time. Shessh, go to sleep for 5 lousy hours... :P
No. "Girlfriend" is the word I wanted. Hearts and Hooves showed that "boyfriend" is in use in Equestria and I decided Dash uses "girlfriend". Other characters may or may not use "marefriend".
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I used to think shipping (not just ponies) was all bad too and that I didn't like it. Then I read good shipping. I'm glad you liked the rundown of her friends. I worried about pissing on people's OTPs a bit writing that. It's why Fluttershy's ended up as kinda a cop-out.
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hehe >spoilers
Oh crap! I didn't realise it wasn't finished! Now I'll have to wait!
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Won't be too long. It's all written, but I'm having some friends proof it for me since I was absent the day they taught us how2grammar.
I'm hoping for chapter 4 and 5 tonight. Maybe 6 if I have time. There are 12 parts in total.