Page generated in 0.023 seconds
Total duration
613 users online
1,042,407 hits today, 2,159,462 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Nights still a fucking idiot. whatever the reason may be, she's still a fucking idiot. she took what would have been a long, yet extremely effective answer to their problem, and fucked it up. and she doesn't even know what she did or where she sent her! why the fuck is no one getting angry at her?!!
5142385 Yeah! Rainbow should have totally been like 'Bad Night!" and then baps Night on the nose with a rolled up newspaper while saying "Bad!" again
5142651
That made me laugh (something I needed right now) Thank you very much!
Period instead of a comma.
Period should be a comma, and the comma should be a period (and remove the "as")
Was that supposed to end in a question mark? It's not really a question.
With the noise you two were making you would have woke the dead;
tell-tale
interrupt. Two "r's"
Not. Surprised. At all.
*eyeroll* Rainbow, Rainbow, Rainbow...
Well, not unless you two watched, but I wouldn't blame you for not wanting to.
conviction
Period instead of a comma.
Night has a point here, but I do agree that she shouldn't be going alone.
whoops, too soon. Hold on.
5144751 Changes posted, thanks!
You can combine these two sentences. The second one looks weird on its own.
needs to be past tense.
regardless of
Period instead of a comma.
That's what Spike said. See how that worked out for him?
In Ataxia's vision
"always" is redundant here. Either of them needs to be removed.
very powerful, out of control grave danger
Something that, if night is right,
I mean, so much is happening
You can take out "she" in there (and the comma, obviously).
True, but we should get some rest
We've got
Either a period or comma after "thank you"
Needs a comma after "Night", as well.
defer to
comma instead of a period. (you can't be looking shabby in A/N, now).
5142385 Because the only thing on her mind at the time was "stop Ataxia from being banished" and "put her somewhere safe". And she didn't really have much time to stop Twi's attempted banishment. I disagree with her rationale (unlike with NMM, Twi would still be around and still have the power to actually take care of Ataxia when the time came) and think she shouldn't have done it, but I can't really find much fault doing it. Especially if you consider that not even Twi knows how long it'd take her to help Ataxia.
5144877 Changes posted, Thanks!
wow... Deja vu.
5144975 Not really. I just accientally submitted part of the edits before I was done.
5148260
It's all good, bad joke on my part.
Thanks for everything though.
At least we have a decent reason for Night's actions now. I can't wait to see how she acts when this is all sorted out...
I can still see Dark Magic being used.
Sorry I have not been commenting but I have been really busy with life and work and....life. Any way it seems that you are a bit better which is good the story is just as good as ever haven't yet finished but I definetily will. I was hoping that Ataxia will not choose that road but like every time Grim Night has to fuck everything up. I will be very very happy when he shows his face because when he does I know you will have something in store for him because karma can be a very very mean bitch. I am looking forward to some more stories from you because you definetily have talent for this hope to see you again.
5355924
You got a lot left to read. Trust me, it gets good.
It may sound cliché but the best is yet to come.
5356099 I look forward to it.
I think that first her is supposed to be he.
Missing 'i' in Celestia.
6434990
Edited, thanks!!!
Ok, i certainly had the first-plan character (except grim, ofc) that i'm hating now, just the sad it's not a villain
_______________________________________________________________________________
I didn't get it.
like.
world.
one.
word.
6484094
Every day ends in Y, so Aurora getting caught with her hoof in the cookiejar happened every single day.
I simply must say good sir, your use of foreshadowing with this "new" guard fellow is simply impeca- impeck- impecca- impeci- it was simply divine!
5143807
Original sentence:
cannot be found at this timeOriginal sentence: She could be key to undoing everything that happened to Ataxia.
Original sentence: It was highly ornamented with several different design carved into it, all of it detailed the slaying of dragons
Original sentence:
cannot be found at this timeOriginal sentence: I talked to him for a while, and we decided that Captain Fey Light will going with you.
Original sentence: She had wanted to tell him to buck off; however, Aurora could come up with no good reason why to deny this request.
Firestar is bed ridden because she over exerted herself in her first month but a pony near due is going on a long trip.
This can't end well.