Chapter 1

This is a dark and desolate place, but peaceful. Then again, peace is boring. It gives me nothing to do but think about-- pretty much anything, and I hate it. It makes me realize how flawed I am, how flawed my world is. I could use somepony to talk to, somepony to distract me... but banishment isn't too kind on that matter. As I lay back on the uncomfortably rocky ground and look at the night sky, I think to myself... why? It's a question with boundless answers. And none of them satisfy me...

Why am I here?

Because you were banished.

Why was I banished?

Because you aided in overthrowing the Princess.

Why does it matter?

Because everypony looks towards the Princess for guidance, and you nearly took that away, which would lead to disorder.

I hate arguing with myself...

Me too.

Hey, why is that light getting brighter?

It's not getting brighter. It's getting closer--really fast!

Shimmering in the distance, a ball of light with a fiery tail rushes towards me, cutting the starry atmosphere with an iridescent glow and shrieking with an intensity I can feel in the back of my throat. It doesn't take long for me to realize I need to move. As my skin stabs at me with little needles, I roll onto my side, and I feel an overbearing heat explode across my back followed by the odor of burning mane and feathers and the sizzling of caking skin. The explosion itself pushes me, causing the rocks to jab and cut at my side.

Silence settles once more, and all I can feel now is pain: the pain from my bleeding side, the pain from my cauterized back and the pain of knowing the universe is out to get me. As I clamp my eyes shut and bite my bottom lip to keep myself from screaming, I hear a deep, almost malevolent breathing behind me. Shuddering from the pain, I try to pick myself up with my wings, but the struggle of unfurling them hurt more than the cause of the pain in the first place. Instead, I slowly get to my hooves, making sure I don't set a wave of paralyzing agony coursing through my body. It helps a bit, but standing up still hurts.

With sweat on my brow and tears on the corners of my eyes, I face what attacked me, but my mane -- what's left of it -- is so drenched in grime it hangs limply over my vision. Through the dark violet shroud, I can still make something out, however, something alive and it sees me. Before my attacker can get the upper hoof, I swipe away my mane and prepare to defend myself, but what I see gives her the opportunity to land the first strike as I drop my defenses in utter shock and disbelief. Standing before me with her horn crackling with dark magic energy is a dark alicorn cloaked in a velvety, midnight blue mane embellished with the night sky itself. Her eyes sparkle like a dazzling emerald with an angry fire within. She's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen-- and she's attacking me.

The alicorn lets loose a ball of surging, azure energy from her horn towards me. Snapping out of my stupor, I grab hold of the spatial fabric before me and tear open a hole to swallow up the magical burst of energy. At this, curiosity and astonishment colors the mare's face, and she takes a step back to reassess her opponent. She begins to circle me, taking in every detail of my being. Once she gets to my wounds, a smirk stamps her face, and she prepares another attack. I quickly jump around, but she's already cast her intended spell. At first, no light is emitted, no energy of any kind, but it isn't until I feel a tingling sensation on my back that I realize what kind of spell she used.

My back erupts in a terrible rage of agony. Every nerve ending feels as if it's drowning in acid. The pain is too much for me to handle, so I collapse, writhing on the dusty, unforgiving and cold landscape. It feels as if I have no control of my body anymore. As if my body has a mind of its own and all it wants is to rid itself of its back-- literally tear it off, from the base of my spine. I contort and struggle, creating more abrasions all over my body from the hard rocks cutting my skin. And all I hear is laughter.

My eyes are drowning in sour tears, but even behind the stinging, watery veil, I see the alicorn enjoying my torment, but more than that, I notice a black cloud hanging over her--something I'm far too familiar with: a dark thought. Using the energy from my involuntary movements, I open a gap once more and release the ball of magic I trapped inside a pocket of space over the alicorn. The energy showers her in midnight lights, catching her by surprise. With her attention off of me, I tear another hole under me and link it to the one over her, landing on her back and wrapping my hooves around her neck.

"Get off of me!" she screams in a powerful and commanding voice as she rears and bucks, trying to knock me off. It's then I hear her horn crackle with magic, signaling me to act quickly. I take a bite of her neck, sinking my teeth in her flesh. It's not long before the heavy taste of iron fills my mouth, but I ignore it and focus on hanging on as I drain her of the dark force clinging onto her blood.

She rocks back and forth, but eventually she calms and falls to the ground with me still hanging on like a parasite. Once I could drain no more of the shadow within her, I let go. She was too taken by the darkness, so I was only able to weaken it and suppress it. Hopefully enough to keep her sane and placid.

With me still on her back, she groans as if she is coming out of a terrible headache. When she stands, I fall over on my back, eliciting my own series of distraught noises. A ringing in my ears drown out the already-set silence while flashes of red and white dance around in the sky. I close my eyes to wait out the spell-induced pain, then the actual physical pain. It's then that I feel cool water course through my veins, numbing my rebellious body. I crack open my eyes and see a bluish alicorn mare framed by a soothing azure halo. Her eyes are liquid sapphire while her face radiates concern. "Art thou well?" she asks as the light is snuffed out with a wave of her horn.

"Y-yeah," I croak, my voice feeling rusty and broken as if I haven't spoken in years, because... well, I haven't. Not out loud, at least. Moreover, is this really the alicorn I was fighting? She changed so much, but considering she healed my wounds, I am not complaining. In fact, she looks even more beautiful than before, so definitely not complaining. But she's an alicorn, one of royal blood. I have never seen the Princess's sister, but I do know she had one; I even know her name. "Are you Luna? Princess Luna? Wh-what are you doing here?"

She looks around, utterly confused as to her whereabouts, but quickly realizes where she is since this is her gem we're on. In a shaky and timid voice, she states, "I-I don't know."

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QPaysTaxes

QPaysTaxes #1 · Jun 29th, 2014 · · ·

Ooh, very, very nice. I saw some errors here and there, and some parts could be rephrased, but as-is... 9/10. I'm eager to hear more.

If you want a helping hand/hoof/limb-end structure, shoot me a PM. I'd be glad to help.

I should mention that I am an editor. I literally find errors for a living and, as such, am very sensitive to them. You wrote a story that so enthralled me that I was able to ignore them. No mean feat is it, to get me to ignore an error so I can keep reading the story.

UndercoverPanda14

UndercoverPanda14 #2 · Jul 13th, 2014 · · ·

4616911 You'd just do that for somepony? Whoa,
well I was maybe wondering if you could lend me a hoof with the story I am currently writing, as I do make mistakes, and I don't always use correct literature..?