Human in Pony's clothing

by TheDawsonator1

Entry #23

So, both Firefly and I have been trying to do the…you know, but everytime we try, something keeps cockblocking us, CMC going missing, Rainbow Dash landed through our window, seriously does that mare know what a door is? And I just repaired that window too, maybe I could ask Twilight for some portable shield or something if those exist.

So yeah, Virginity still exists, it never bothers you until you start to want to have sex with your partner, then it’s an infuriating curse. But their attempts are inevitable because soon I will be rid of it! MUHAHAHAHAHA!

---

It was yet again a nice mor- HAHA! Nice try! You gotta wake up earlier to give the slip Universe, don’t you look confused, you know you were trying to get me to say that line and then you curse me with your universal powers, NOT GONNA WORK THIS TIME BEEEEEEYATCH!!

Anyway, we were once again were up for a sunny day, no clouds in the skies and such so naturally we finished early and we did take #99999999999999 of getting laid, let me tell you, Firefly wants it bad, and that’s without heat, you should of seen CK and Firefly when I first met them and it was heat time. I barely managed to get on the train away from the horde of mares.

---

Lightning Bolt had just got a leaving train with CK and Firefly at the front the crowd of hungry mares in heat.

“Alas my dear mares, this will be the day you will all remember as the day you ALMOST caught Lightning Bolt!” Lightning said to the mares while at the back of the train

---

“You ready this time?” Firefly asked
“Babe, I was born ready! And with the wait, I say we deserve double and more" I said putting my foreleg over her shoulder
“Well in that case, whaddya say we get straight to the-WOAH!” Firefly said seductively

My house started rolling suddenly as we both flied the center in midair as things came spinning like a washing machine but we managed to get out with our heads intact and our virginity again!.

“Well, I understand the universe trying to cockblock us but this is ridiculous” Firefly said massaging her head after taking a blow
“There’s only one being that can do stuff like that, DISCORD!” I knew at once
“Did he escape again?” Firefly asked
“No, it means Celestia has decided to get the Mane Six to reform him” I said
“Wanna go check it out?” Firefly asked
“Sure, and I can get him to stop spinning my house so we can make sweet sweet love” I agreed
“Dead body?” Firefly asked
“Not this time, we need Discord alive so future events go well, the next cockblocker will suffer the same fate as the fake Pinkie Pie” I declined the offer

Yeah, we want it that bad that we start killing those who deny us, we’ll be living next to a graveyard soon…okay it was only the fake Pinkie Pie that crashed through our windows but we still yelled at them and maybe a few punches.

---

So when we arrived, we found a very reformed Discord along with the Mane Six next to him, guess we missed the fireworks. I still have some questions for Discord based on our last meeting. If I’m right, he should have a few answers and he should, why shouldn’t he?

“Well if isn’t my good friend, Lightning Bolt?” Discord greeted me
“And if it ain’t my recently reformed friend, Discord? How’s it hanging?” I greeted back
“Oh you know, just got out of stone, recently reformed and made a good friend named Fluttershy but you already knew that didn’t you?” Discord replied with a halo above his head as he said reformed

Okay, greetings aside it’s time to get some answers.

“Guess so, now the last time we talked you had some answers before we were interrupted” I said, getting down to business
“Indeed, we were having a nice conversation before dear Luna and our new friends showed up didn’t we?” Discord replied
“Yes we did, now you said you didn’t send me here but somepony would be just as chaotic or maybe more to be able to do that, do you have any idea who?” I interrogated
“Hmmm, the only such honorable chaotic creatures I know are all dead, there is one though, but I can’t remember his name, that’s interesting…” Discord answered
“So there IS somepony out there?” I asked
“I just said that genius!” Discord retorted back
“Sorry! Can you at least give a description? Maybe Celestia might know at least?” I hoped Celestia would know who this creature could be.
“That I cannot say, Gavin. It’s a powerful magic, only the most powerful creatures in the art of Chaos such as myself and others can do this, it allows any creature to be barred from memory, that is to say anypony who tries to remember the user or accesses a memory of another pony to remember cannot be seen. It’s actually almost useless and difficult to do.” Discord explained
“So basically somepony is wasting time with a spell so I can’t remember him?” I said
“Your memory has been barred it seems from a particular time” Discord asked
“The creature appeared at the end of Season 4 and we’re about halfway through Season 3, but I don’t have any ideas who it could be” I said
“Well my dear little human, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say somepony doesn’t want to be known before they strike” Discord said, getting relaxed on a hammock
“So, if I understand this right, the only way I’ll know who it is, is basically I have to bump into them?” I asked
“Exactly! Bingo! DING DING DING! We have a winner! That’s the only way that magic can be broken, you have to see the creature’s physical form, and if I were an evil mastermind like I was before, I wouldn’t show up until I need to.” Discord confirmed

Well that’s one way of hiding your identity I suppose, it’s kind of clever I suppose. But would they fear somepony already knew about him/her? Did they already know about me and cast the spell so I wouldn’t reveal them to Celestia and the others? I’ll have to play the waiting game…

“Oh, and I must warn you Bolty, the creature who cast this may be more powerful than Celestia, Luna and I put together to cast this sort of magic, but you are strong yes? You can handle him, save the world and get the girl!” Discord warned
“Thanks very much Discord, have fun with reformation” I said as I turned to leave

The others had been silent the whole time, I barely noticed Firefly next to me as I walked back to the house. Somepony was clearly using some sort of magical Spoiler tag against me, I don’t think it would of happened normally, they must know about me. The question is…who? Who is this creature? Is it a pony? Is it a changeling? Maybe Discord’s brother or something if he has one? Perhaps Nightmare Moon and/or Sombra returned and joined forces with some other evil?

A certain uncertainty plagues my mind, I have always been prepared but now I am not for the next villain, I have no idea what their strengths and weaknesses are, I do not know how they were beaten the first time.

There’s not a thing I can do now but live my life and wait…

Author's Note:

Isn't it funny how something completely useless exists any other time but as soon as some hero or villain or something is involved it's suddenly very important?

Oh and update hooray, you missed me didn't you? No need to lie, you can admit it now.

Oh and the whole memory blocking thing is basically one magical version of spoiler tags basically. Yes even Equestria has those!

Comments

[Amethyst Blade]

It's Tirek!

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

Hello Captain Jack Sparrow

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

4784393 can't be he's not that powerful till he's stolen alot of magic which he wouldn't have at this point. So the author is adding a new player

[cosmosain]

4784578 no
That where his power went
Dude must be paranoid

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

4785848 no he has always been weak. he has to suckj on the magic of others to be strong.

[cosmosain]

4786558
Or maybe a timetraval spell..
What it's not impossible.
He did have the power of 4 alicorn sand a powerful unicorn can cast one

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

4786586 not at thisd point. he could only tie suped up Twilight after taking the magic of ALL ponies AND DISCORD. Tirek cannot be the villain behind this part.

[Charedfirescale]

4786607 At this point its Obvious that its Tirek. Although how he did it remains a mystery.

[Charedfirescale]

4786607 Also, as I understand it, he was purged of his original powers and used that drain thing to not only gain his power back, but then some.

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

4791578 Which means nothing at this point. remember Bolt arrived before the pilot thus before Tirek escaped Tartus. Tirek CANNOT be behind this.

[Charedfirescale]

4791684 Good point, do you think whoever did bring him here is also the reason behind the universal cock-blocking?

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

4791689 Probably

[Frankie2]

4784393 That's what I was thinking. After all, Bolty can't remember the villiian from season 4, so it would make sense. I think I know why he did it too, but I don't want to accidentally spoil anything.

[Altered Giratina]

You can handle him, save the world and get the girl!”

Check, check, and che- wait what?