Yes, get a new Ally! Who knows, you might even be able to take her with you when you return! That... Actually seems like a really good course of action actually. Spoilers! ;p Keep going! ;)
The suspense. Aldo, as they can(presumably) eat grass, why don't they just loan a few starting books about magic, then about illusions and then just escape at night? I'm pretty sure that single guard has to sleep at some point...
5181790 I will cherish this draconic being and its active pilosity. Thank you, good sir. Have this vital organ of an enemy of mine in return.
5181865 I do not recall saying bicorns are capable of using magic. Unless... are you implying they should beat Chainmail up with books while he is asleep? Such an evil idea... I love it.
5181935 Ouch, were you one of the participants in the thread where I was called an 'eldritch horror'? Cuz that condescending style brings back memories.
5185249 I don't have a clue what you are talking about...but as someone who knows all that is going to transpire I was merely making a friendly jab...I apologize if it came off as mean-spirited...lol
5183319 That's the thing, you didn't say it... And no, I don't like nor promote violence, I'm one of those 'Love & Tolerate' guys. And, if they can't use magic(which I say they can), then just sneak out or jump out of the >omg so high<(just in case saying, that was sarcasm) 2nd story window, of course check what's below the window and where the guard sleeps first.
5185258 No problem, do you want to see the thing I was talking about? The thread I mean? I am somehow, even if I have deduced many mistakes on my part, still proud over it, proudest thing in my life actually XD.
5185268 I have no idea what you mean, quite literally, English isn't my mother tongue. Anyway, decided to give you the link anyway, its a long thread, idk if you'll want to read it all, most of the fun starts at Page 2:
5185268 I have no idea what you mean, quite literally, English isn't my mother tongue. Anyway, decided to give you the link anyway, its a long thread, idk if you'll want to read it all, most of the fun starts at Page 2(although, if you want to understand it all, read from the beginning):
5185487 Uh, yeah, I did, um, welcome, I guess, I think I am the proudest over this because I personally somehow had fun whilst writing the responses >_> idk how that works. Also, the pink side of your avatar is more profit.
I found the premise of this story to be quite interesting... and its execution didn't disappoint me
You've managed to create two original characters with their own little quirks and distinguishable personalities, which many other authors fail to properly do with theirs. I don't even mind their constant bickering
I haven't noticed any glaring errors that would distract me from the immersion, so that's also a plus.
All in all, I enjoyed reading this and will be looking forward to future chapters
5188367 We're really glad to hear this. My co-writer has declared that you made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
As you can imagine, we do so like having those characters clash, as they are great friends that cannot stand each other for extended (read, in the order of seconds) periods of time. Or pretend to. We have a blast writing them snark at each other. So, we're glad they end up looking like their own persons in the end.
In any case, we thank you for this comment and will do our best to please you with more chapters as soon as possible.
5188367 I wish to state i never said i felt warm and fuzzy inside...I offered a hug...geez lol Plus...Frenchies and Brits love to argue...this is just a fact of life...lol
...yeah still not buying it. If bicorns were having 12 foals a generation, even if you only started with 2, at that rate they'd outnumber the number of humans on planet Earth in under half a millenia. That's assuming a roughly 150 year lifespan, sexual maturity at age 18, infertility at 120 and 1 child per litter. I'm not weird.
Comment posted by Anemptyshell deleted Nov 6th, 2014
5234296 I'm sorry to say your comment does make you weird. More specifically this one 5233980 .
This being said, you're making certain assumptions here. For starters, the line "But everyone acts as if there is some obligation to lift their tails for bicorns." is inaccurate. Everyone is acting as if bicorns have an obligation to lift their tails for others, there's a very big difference here. Another is assuming that this kind of rate or even attitude is constant throughout the history of the country.
There is a number of factors that have yet to be revealed that are keeping the number of bicorns in Equestria still lower than the rest of the population that you do not know of. But, without spoiling anything, you are also forgetting to take into account consanguinity if such a scenario would occur, with a rising number of birth defects and others. And since there ARE herds in this fic, a significant number of families in a single location are related to one another, often to the first and second degree.
Of course my model is ridiculously simplistic. For any degree of realism I'd have to include a food source, and a finite geographical area for that food source to grow upon, thus putting a hard limit on any population growth. But my only real point was I can't figure out why ponies are so intent on not just... letting bicorns die off naturally.
The tail raising comment was about how all the mares were being all awkward and blushing and shy. If they were anticipating nothing more sexual than watching a Nature documentary I'd think they would be more... enthusiastic? Encouraging? Just there's less risk involved when you're not the one who's going to be riding the pocket rocket. But their reaction could easily be something unrelated to the bicorn restoration and totally not evil internment project. (BRTNEIP)
You would get so many downvotes if this was about bison not bicorns.
Good story, good characterization so far. I at least fully understand and agree with the incredulity thing. You do not accept someone's word of an unlikely event without proof and personal experience. This is the case regardless of how different that world is from the reader's. I can't recall if Equestria Girls was locally confirmed. I think it was however. This adds the Quantum Mirror (Stargate ref) as extra points of evidence to it being at least inside the realm of possibility. Although magic, teleportation, shape-shifting, and Quantum Mirrors exist, it is still not easy to accept. Especially with the Mirror being only operational once per *unknown delay * (30 moons meaning 30 days, or two and a half years, due to local nature of reality and astral manipulation) and hence would not be a possible avenue of entrance. That along with her preconceptions (which everyone has tons of) easily explain and make it fully reasonable that she believes them to be making up stories. I still have no idea if traumatic memories can actually cause you to come up with new false memories to cover them up in reality, but many fictions suggest that is the case. Bicorns, locally, are known to sometimes be abused, obviously in secret, and she believes them to have escaped. She follows up with what are obviously more or less standard protocalls, and, as with almost any person (exceptions are people who are dangerously open minded, like conspiracy theorists) will have the data they observe pigon-holed into their preconceptions. If they don't fit perfectly, some minor details can be explained away. If it is extreme enough, then the whole system breaks, and they end up having to reevaluate things. She did not observe, in any way, any true evidence that they are telling a true story. She did not view their arrival, Transformation, or old forms. She did not view their memories (which admittedly is probably illegal, and depending on local rules of how memories work, may or may not then be sufficient) She only knows them to be Bicorns, who were in the Everfree forest, and seemingly in questionable mental state.
On Bicorns, they apparently have a intrinsic Luck effect, which is presumably genetic. This makes me think of Larry Niven's Ringworld's Teela Brown. I think that is gramatically correct... In Ringworld, the Pierson's Puppeteers manipulated Human's Breeding Programs. By which I mean that after strict birth control to avoid overpopulation was implemented, they later managed to tweak the system somehow. Each person, or family, I believe, had some number of Child slots, and could sell them for significant amounts of money to another. Additionally, extra slots were given out in a lottery-type event. This had the interesting effect of causing people who were adapt at making significant amounts of money to be more likely to reproduce, which had selective evolutionary pressures, making those skills somewhat more common. Additionally, The lottery did in fact select for luck, which was locally (in universe) a genetic trait. Teela Brown was one such result. Many others existed, and in the book, they convinently were all busy, away, or otherwise impossible to contact for the mission to the ringworld, due to their luck. Teela Brown constantly twisted events around her to make her more likely to survive, and even to avoid injury. I think she never even learned to walk like other people, seeing as she never even stumbled or even got an injury at all, if I recall correctly.. Which was not quite the same as making the mission itself more likely to succeed...
Anyhow, I think the local setup here is similar. Bicorns, regardless of origin, have a similar genetic luck effect. What that chance manipulates, I don't really know. It is unlikely that it Reduces chances of injuries by a lot, since that protection law exists. Also, They can obviously be abused, based on Twilight's assumptions about their origin. I have no idea what chances the luck trait effects.
I am uncertain as to whether or not Bicorns interbreed with other pony-types. (and whether they are considered one of the 4-6 pony-types. Earth Pony, Pegasus, Unicorn, Alicorn. Also bat Ponies, and then now Bicorns.) If they do, then presumably that would give some of the luck trait. However, other data suggests something more disturbing.
5234296 The 12 siblings thing doesn't really fit correctly, since that would easily result in a massive population increase. That would certainly contradict the idea of them being rare and important to protect. If this is not a rare case, with most families having far, far fewer children, then there is a balancing mortality rate involved. <Speculation> I thought of the possibility of that luck (or substance or otherwise responsible for it) being extracted from Bicorns, resulting in probably or certain death. While, obviously, morally evil as hell from our current standards, other civilizations here on Earth, and many in the past, would have no moral issues with such. Also, This would only be the case with Sapient beings. Humans clearly have no moral qualms about breeding, raising, and slaughtering Animals, who are only Sentient, not Sapient. </Speculation>
I suppose we might as well also note that Discord was asked if he created new Bicorns. Implying, I think, that he either made more, transformed some, or made the originals sometime in the past.
Yes, get a new Ally! Who knows, you might even be able to take her with you when you return! That... Actually seems like a really good course of action actually. Spoilers! ;p
Keep going! ;)
Been waiting to see whether they'd act like men, or mice.
Ed stands up to Twilight. Pierre goes around her. Nice to see neither of them rolling over for her.
Have an upvote, and a reptile with facial hair.
The suspense.
Aldo, as they can(presumably) eat grass, why don't they just loan a few starting books about magic, then about illusions and then just escape at night? I'm pretty sure that single guard has to sleep at some point...
5181865 hohoho... Someone is making assumptions about what bicorns can do... No worries my dear lad, things are just getting started.
5181771 And the shipping begins. Just as planned!
5181790 I will cherish this draconic being and its active pilosity. Thank you, good sir. Have this vital organ of an enemy of mine in return.
5181865 I do not recall saying bicorns are capable of using magic. Unless... are you implying they should beat Chainmail up with books while he is asleep? Such an evil idea... I love it.
5181935 Ouch, were you one of the participants in the thread where I was called an 'eldritch horror'?
Cuz that condescending style brings back memories.
5185249 I don't have a clue what you are talking about...but as someone who knows all that is going to transpire I was merely making a friendly jab...I apologize if it came off as mean-spirited...lol
5183319
That's the thing, you didn't say it...
And no, I don't like nor promote violence, I'm one of those 'Love & Tolerate' guys.
And, if they can't use magic(which I say they can), then just sneak out or jump out of the >omg so high<(just in case saying, that was sarcasm) 2nd story window, of course check what's below the window and where the guard sleeps first.
5185258 No problem, do you want to see the thing I was talking about? The thread I mean? I am somehow, even if I have deduced many mistakes on my part, still proud over it, proudest thing in my life actually XD.
5185265 Taking that whole...aim high shoot low thing to heart arn't we...lol
5185268 I have no idea what you mean, quite literally, English isn't my mother tongue.
Anyway, decided to give you the link anyway, its a long thread, idk if you'll want to read it all, most of the fun starts at Page 2:
www.fimfiction.net/group/822/humans-arent-bastards/thread/31700/the-bambi-syndrome-or-overromanticizing-and-idealization-of-animals-and-nature
5185268 I have no idea what you mean, quite literally, English isn't my mother tongue.
Anyway, decided to give you the link anyway, its a long thread, idk if you'll want to read it all, most of the fun starts at Page 2(although, if you want to understand it all, read from the beginning):
www.fimfiction.net/group/822/humans-arent-bastards/thread/31700/the-bambi-syndrome-or-overromanticizing-and-idealization-of-animals-and-nature
5185278 all i meant was you chose a funny thing for your most proud moment...lol and thanks for the thread...i guess.
5185487 Uh, yeah, I did, um, welcome, I guess, I think I am the proudest over this because I personally somehow had fun whilst writing the responses >_> idk how that works.
Also, the pink side of your avatar is more profit.
5186616 not gonna lie...i have very little idea what that quip about my avatar means...
5186684
^^
I found the premise of this story to be quite interesting... and its execution didn't disappoint me
You've managed to create two original characters with their own little quirks and distinguishable personalities, which many other authors fail to properly do with theirs. I don't even mind their constant bickering
I haven't noticed any glaring errors that would distract me from the immersion, so that's also a plus.
All in all, I enjoyed reading this and will be looking forward to future chapters
5188367 We're really glad to hear this. My co-writer has declared that you made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
As you can imagine, we do so like having those characters clash, as they are great friends that cannot stand each other for extended (read, in the order of seconds) periods of time. Or pretend to. We have a blast writing them snark at each other. So, we're glad they end up looking like their own persons in the end.
In any case, we thank you for this comment and will do our best to please you with more chapters as soon as possible.
5188367 I wish to state i never said i felt warm and fuzzy inside...I offered a hug...geez lol
Plus...Frenchies and Brits love to argue...this is just a fact of life...lol
What is wrong with me.
...yeah still not buying it. If bicorns were having 12 foals a generation, even if you only started with 2, at that rate they'd outnumber the number of humans on planet Earth in under half a millenia. That's assuming a roughly 150 year lifespan, sexual maturity at age 18, infertility at 120 and 1 child per litter. I'm not weird.
5234296 I'm sorry to say your comment does make you weird. More specifically this one
5233980 .
This being said, you're making certain assumptions here. For starters, the line "But everyone acts as if there is some obligation to lift their tails for bicorns." is inaccurate. Everyone is acting as if bicorns have an obligation to lift their tails for others, there's a very big difference here. Another is assuming that this kind of rate or even attitude is constant throughout the history of the country.
There is a number of factors that have yet to be revealed that are keeping the number of bicorns in Equestria still lower than the rest of the population that you do not know of. But, without spoiling anything, you are also forgetting to take into account consanguinity if such a scenario would occur, with a rising number of birth defects and others. And since there ARE herds in this fic, a significant number of families in a single location are related to one another, often to the first and second degree.
5236833
Of course my model is ridiculously simplistic. For any degree of realism I'd have to include a food source, and a finite geographical area for that food source to grow upon, thus putting a hard limit on any population growth. But my only real point was I can't figure out why ponies are so intent on not just... letting bicorns die off naturally.
The tail raising comment was about how all the mares were being all awkward and blushing and shy. If they were anticipating nothing more sexual than watching a Nature documentary I'd think they would be more... enthusiastic? Encouraging? Just there's less risk involved when you're not the one who's going to be riding the pocket rocket. But their reaction could easily be something unrelated to the bicorn restoration and totally not evil internment project. (BRTNEIP)
You would get so many downvotes if this was about bison not bicorns.
Good story, good characterization so far. I at least fully understand and agree with the incredulity thing. You do not accept someone's word of an unlikely event without proof and personal experience. This is the case regardless of how different that world is from the reader's.
I can't recall if Equestria Girls was locally confirmed. I think it was however. This adds the Quantum Mirror (Stargate ref) as extra points of evidence to it being at least inside the realm of possibility.
Although magic, teleportation, shape-shifting, and Quantum Mirrors exist, it is still not easy to accept. Especially with the Mirror being only operational once per *unknown delay * (30 moons meaning 30 days, or two and a half years, due to local nature of reality and astral manipulation) and hence would not be a possible avenue of entrance. That along with her preconceptions (which everyone has tons of) easily explain and make it fully reasonable that she believes them to be making up stories. I still have no idea if traumatic memories can actually cause you to come up with new false memories to cover them up in reality, but many fictions suggest that is the case. Bicorns, locally, are known to sometimes be abused, obviously in secret, and she believes them to have escaped. She follows up with what are obviously more or less standard protocalls, and, as with almost any person (exceptions are people who are dangerously open minded, like conspiracy theorists) will have the data they observe pigon-holed into their preconceptions. If they don't fit perfectly, some minor details can be explained away. If it is extreme enough, then the whole system breaks, and they end up having to reevaluate things. She did not observe, in any way, any true evidence that they are telling a true story.
She did not view their arrival, Transformation, or old forms. She did not view their memories (which admittedly is probably illegal, and depending on local rules of how memories work, may or may not then be sufficient) She only knows them to be Bicorns, who were in the Everfree forest, and seemingly in questionable mental state.
On Bicorns, they apparently have a intrinsic Luck effect, which is presumably genetic.
This makes me think of Larry Niven's Ringworld's Teela Brown. I think that is gramatically correct...
In Ringworld, the Pierson's Puppeteers manipulated Human's Breeding Programs. By which I mean that after strict birth control to avoid overpopulation was implemented, they later managed to tweak the system somehow. Each person, or family, I believe, had some number of Child slots, and could sell them for significant amounts of money to another. Additionally, extra slots were given out in a lottery-type event. This had the interesting effect of causing people who were adapt at making significant amounts of money to be more likely to reproduce, which had selective evolutionary pressures, making those skills somewhat more common.
Additionally, The lottery did in fact select for luck, which was locally (in universe) a genetic trait. Teela Brown was one such result. Many others existed, and in the book, they convinently were all busy, away, or otherwise impossible to contact for the mission to the ringworld, due to their luck. Teela Brown constantly twisted events around her to make her more likely to survive, and even to avoid injury. I think she never even learned to walk like other people, seeing as she never even stumbled or even got an injury at all, if I recall correctly..
Which was not quite the same as making the mission itself more likely to succeed...
Anyhow, I think the local setup here is similar. Bicorns, regardless of origin, have a similar genetic luck effect. What that chance manipulates, I don't really know. It is unlikely that it Reduces chances of injuries by a lot, since that protection law exists. Also, They can obviously be abused, based on Twilight's assumptions about their origin. I have no idea what chances the luck trait effects.
I am uncertain as to whether or not Bicorns interbreed with other pony-types. (and whether they are considered one of the 4-6 pony-types. Earth Pony, Pegasus, Unicorn, Alicorn. Also bat Ponies, and then now Bicorns.) If they do, then presumably that would give some of the luck trait. However, other data suggests something more disturbing.
5234296
The 12 siblings thing doesn't really fit correctly, since that would easily result in a massive population increase. That would certainly contradict the idea of them being rare and important to protect. If this is not a rare case, with most families having far, far fewer children, then there is a balancing mortality rate involved.
<Speculation>
I thought of the possibility of that luck (or substance or otherwise responsible for it) being extracted from Bicorns, resulting in probably or certain death.
While, obviously, morally evil as hell from our current standards, other civilizations here on Earth, and many in the past, would have no moral issues with such. Also, This would only be the case with Sapient beings. Humans clearly have no moral qualms about breeding, raising, and slaughtering Animals, who are only Sentient, not Sapient.
</Speculation>
I suppose we might as well also note that Discord was asked if he created new Bicorns. Implying, I think, that he either made more, transformed some, or made the originals sometime in the past.
I just realized Edward and Pierre don't have cutie marks. Shouldn't that be a big red flag, or do bicorns not get get marks?
...it is slowly dawning on me how "Harmony " is maintained in Equestria. I speculate that requires more than just the Elements.
Holy shit, I understand that bicorns are treated as some sort of anti-death lucky charm/misfortune detector but damn
.... run