5 -A Squirrel to Feed
"Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and anvil, is rightwise king born of england." Pinkie Pie intoned, reading the inscription engraved upon the swords hilt.
"I...wait, what?" Twilight was bewildered, Pinkies statement having seemingly managed to make a sword appear out of nowhere. "You...how long has that sword been there?" The sword reached almost twice the colts body length, and Twilight could not for the life of her rationalize how she had managed to overlook it.
"I've...had it this entire time ma'am." Arthur absently adjusted the scabbard with a hoof. He looked from her to Merlin, hoping for some intervention. He didn't like how she intoned it, as if carrying a sword was out of the ordinary or something. Come to think of it, he hadn't seen anyone else with any weapons. Any visible weapons anyway. And with everyone he had seen walking through town being completely naked (with the occasional hat or scarf), he would felt he would have known almost immediately.
"That's impossible. I may have been distracted, what with the hydra rampaging and all, but...but I..." Twilight sputtered, unable to finish her thought process. She leaned closer, getting a better view. "Is it a...situational awareness dampening spell?"
"More of a...don't notice whats there type of...how-how-how in blazes did she see it?" Merlin scowled at Pinkie Pie, eliciting a giggle from the pony in question. "I constructed that charm myself, the material of the scabbard is magically tuned, I based it off of a -" Arthur's eyes glazed over. Merlin's descriptions while informative, were slightly above what he could understand.
With a loud grumble located deep within his gut, Arthur managed to interrupt the flow of conversation. He also managed to direct four very embarrassing stares from those assembled in the room. "I...haven't had anything to eat since yesterday...we all haven't..." They had been directed directly from the castle, to the forest, to this "hospital". It was only slightly overstating it to say that the previous day hadn't been conducive to "relaxing" in any way shape or size.
Merlin laughed, deep and hearty. It resounded around the room, causing the rest to join in momentarily. "I suppose we could all do with a bit of a bite. Wouldn't you say so, miss Sparkle?"
"I...yes. We can all get some food in the cafeteria, but I don't think the nurse will approve of you moving with that leg." Twilight gestured to the cast, which Merlin had by this point propped up on top of a wad of blanket. "How about Pinkie and I go to the cafeteria, and we'll be back with a couple of trays. Does that sound good to you?" With this she gave a tenuous look towards Arthur and Guinevere, a slight smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.
"That...sounds lovely?" Arthur didn't really know how to respond. Most of the time, it had been him waiting on others. From time to time the cook made something special for him, but he had never received any special treatment. Especially from his step brother, Kay.
"So we'll just go get the food, and be back before you know it." With a broad smile from Twilight, and a promise from Pinkie Pie involving something called "cupcakes" they left through the door.
"We need to leave." Merlin stated, swinging his back legs off the bed once more. "I appreciate this Twilights hospitality, but having the attention of an alicorn could be-" he opened the door, peering left and right down the hall. "Rather distracting. Nothing bad persay, just...bad memories. Come along Wart-PEN, I really have to remember that. Listen-"Arthur and Guinevere had followed him down the hall, and pulled to a stop once he whirled around to face them. "Remember your new name, Pen. For the both of us. Guinevere." With a slight smile, Merlin turned back the hall at an increased pace.
"Merlin, I don't-" Arthur dodged around a stallion, who had pressed himself against the wall to make way for the strange old pony with the cast. "I don't get it, why cant we wait until after eating? What harm could she do?"
Merlin stopped once more. "For starters, she was getting too familiar with information relating to your sword-" Merlin poked a hoof towards the sword, "and if it gets back to a certain somepony that I carted another worlds cornerstone across the veil, I would...well..." Merlin had stopped once more, and was sheepishly scuffing at the floor. "I'm pretty sure she wouldn't be very happy with that...not happy at all..."
"She?" Arthur asked, pushing Guinevere off of him. She had apparently seen something interesting near the ceiling, and had propped herself up with her two forelegs on his back.
"She? What? Never mind Pen, lets go." Merlin set off once more. Peering through a duo of flapping doors, Merlin pushed through them and continued. "Wheres the blasted exit? They're supposed to have all exits clearly marked, yet here we are running in circ- OH GOD SHHHHHHH" Merlin doubled back through a door, and pinned Arthur back against the wall. "Well Wart, we seem to have found the cafeteria. As long as we wait a couple minutes for those two to leave..." Looking through the cracked door, Arthur saw Pinkie Pie shoveling food up high on multiple trays. She then proceeded to balance them upon each other, and exited with Twilight in fast pursuit. "Well, It looks as if you'll be getting a meal anyway. Lets try to be quick, shall we?"
-~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~-
" -That's why its nearly impossible to see through such a spell, but whatever. Lets chalk it up to Pinkie Sense. I don't think we could reasonably work out the equations for-" Twilight stopped in the middle of the hallway, the furious muzzle of nurse Redheart pushing directly into hers.
"Where. Are. They." Nurse Redhearts voiced dripped with venom more deadly than any manticore.
"I...I don't...what?" Twilight backed up as carefully as she could, hoisting the two trays of food she had gotten above her so she could more easily escape.
"I leave a patient with you, I expect that patient to still BE THERE when I come back to check on them. I don't want to come back to an EMPTY ROOM, now do I?"
"I...we were just... food?" Twilight's mind was racing. Why would Merlin and the two foals have left the room? It didn't make any sense! Couple that with the furious onslaught of Nurse Redheart, and Twilight thoughts were scrambling.
"Look, you see them, you get them back to their room, that stallion is NOT in any shape to be wandering around! And you-" Redheart turned to Pinkie, a scowl on her face quickly frozen by the fact that she didn't really have anything to rail on her with. "You just keep the streamers to a minimum. Mr Clean may like you-" she referred to the bald janitor with the magic erasers, "but even he gets tired having to clean up your messes." She pushed past Twilight, and steamed off down the hall. She stopped twice to peer over anothers shoulder to see their clipboards, but quickly moved out of Twilight's and Pinkie's sight.
"Pinkie. We have to find them. We need to...to..."Twilight wracked her brain, trying to think up a plan. "We'll do a sweep, room by room, we'll see if anypony's seen them...well at the very least,"Twilight turned to Pinkie Pie with a smile, "We know they aren't in the cafeteria!"
-~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~-
"Is it really all right? Won't this be the first place they check?" Arthur asked, as Merlin scarfed down another sheaf of "hay fries". They tasted good, but Arthur still wasn't quite used to the "herbivore" role. No meat? Arthur couldn't fathom it. Guinevere had managed to find a "peanut butter pecan nut ball" tray and had made Arthur load her up half of what was available. They were tasty enough.
"This will be the last place they check, trust me Wart. I figure... we can wait a good fifteen minutes before they check here. Just keep you head down and, oh for goodness sakes will you calm her down?" Merlin gestured to Guinevere, who at this point was letting loose with squeals of delight. Presumably in relation to the food she had secured.
Arthur took one of the balls she had been violently offering to him, and this seemed to calm her to some extent. She chittered at him in a low tone, tucking into another with gusto. "So what next Merlin?"
"What next? Well I assume that our purple alicorn friend is only visiting, we shouldn't have to skip town if we keep quiet for a bit. A rural little burg like this, not exactly the locale of one of her status. Probably not more than a couple days. Heck, she'll probably be doing us a service, unless alicorns have become common stock. Soak up a fair amount of attention. Very popular." He had finished everything on his tray, and looked back to the serving counter. Maybe a second course? He hadn't had jello in a while... "We'll probably find a farm or something of the like on the outskirts of town. I suggest we start there. We go and see if we can't get a room. I should still have applicable currency, if we overpay," Merlin winked at Arthur, " we should be able to keep our activitys on the- hehe," Merlin stopped, finding perhaps the choice of words rather funny. "-down low."
Arthur didn't get it.
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A farm huh? Well Merlin, there just so happens to be one on the outskirts of Ponyville. But I don't know if you'll wanna stay there, the farm happens to be home someone who's close friends with that alicorn.
4103881
Bah, what are the odds of that?
Why do I have a feeling more and more of Merlin's expectations are going to be dashed, and maybe even his negative ones?
so, he's gotten on tia's badsside in times past eh? this could be good
Gwen's gotten funnier
Hmm, wonder what he did to irritate Tia? Heh, if they'd just played it cool rather than acting all sneaky everything would have been fine, now there going to have everypony chasing after them.
4103914 Oh, I don't know, probably 10/10.
I really liked this chapter, and can't wait to see more.
4103914 By the rules of Dramatic probability, (a field of mathematics not often thought of out of story telling circles) quite high actually. It's two basic principles are as follows: "If the potential for conflict is visible, then it will never be passed over." and "if there's a million to one chance against something of vital importance happening, then it's that one time rather than the other 999,999 times."
Or as Rich "The Giant" Burlew put it by way of his characters in The Order of the Stick "And once again, Probability proves itself willing to sneak into a back alley and service Drama as would a copper piece harlot.", and "A 10% chance is pretty unlikely, but everyone knows that a one-in-a-million chance is a sure thing!"
Surely Merlin has studied dramatic probability!
4103914
I am so glad for the inclusion of the squirrel. She's just so adorable and precocious... and I am hoping so much to see Pen Dragon and her in Cheerilee's class, even briefly. XD
Discord: "Oh-ho! I think I'm going to need more popcorn!"
Brilliant short chapter.
Hrmmm...
Oh, Merlin? The Library might be a good idea...Plenty of history and magic, after all..
4106278
Library you say? Perfect! Not exactly the location an alicorn would go looking anyway. If only a library was a small town staple that he would have known undoubtedly about.~
4107298
I......eh.......what? Chanting?
Hehehehehehehehe, Merlin has no idea what he's in for, Twilight is going to be chasing him around for a while. I suggest Pinkie prepare a Yackety Sax tape for chase scenes. And I bet Merlin pissed off Celestia somehow last time he was in Equestria.
*grabs popcorn* THIS IS GOING TO BE AWESOME!
Ah! Perhaps a certain alicorn will be angry at Merlin, but not for the reasons were think!
Sounds too me like Merlin was a player in his day.
Did Merlin tick off Celestia? but how....
"MERLIN! YOU LEFT ME AT THE ALTAR!"
.....
Okay, maybe not that, but still. I'm curious.
4109047
Not.............THAT severe.........
Good god are all my good ideas really this obvious?~
Really though, Merlin did not leave Celestia at the alter.
Now this has nothing to do with the fanfic per say , but...
Who else thought of Merlin's Sugar Bowl when they watched the dinner scene of 'Keep Calm, Flutter On'? I know that scene was mostly a reference to Beauty and the Beast, but there was a bit of The Sword in the Stone too when you think about it.
guinevere = squirrel
why? how? why?
4104376 perhaps it's Lulu not Tia
Hm... The more I think on it, the more... saddening... It seems that Merlin picked THAT name for the lady-squirrel.