...And Some Other Stuff
Dale pointed at Nancy, then Redcorn. He had a blank face.
"So. All. This. Time. You. Weren't. Healing. My. Wife?" Dale said in a robotic-like tone.
Redcorn nodded with an ashamed look on his face.
"You. Nancy. Sex?"
"Yes sug. I'm so sorry." Nancy said as she looked at the ground.
Dale remembered all the signs.
"Dale! This isn't what it looks lik-"
"Shut up. Now get off of my lawnmower and start healing my wife!"
...
"He's taking the fun out of this."
"Joseph's true father is-"
"NANCY LOVES YOU!"
"-an ALIEN!-!-!-!"
...
"What?"
"I dreamt of this Indian. But, he had no face. No eyes, no mouth, no nose, nothing! Then, I saw Joseph being born. I looked in his face...he had no face...like that Indian..."
...
"I am that Indian! I am a Native-American!"
"Nancy. What's John Redcorn doing in the shower?"
"I believe I deserve the ass-kicking. I slept with my best friend's wife...for 18 years!"
"Yeah Bill's wife was a tramp!"
Dale stared at Redcorn. "I thought you were stealing that lawnmower. I thought Joseph was an alien. I thought I was an Indian. I thought you had sex with Lenore. All that wasn't true?"
Redcorn nodded.
"Even having sex with Lenore."
Redcorn let out a disgusted look. "Of course not."
Dale took a deep breath. "Let me sum it up. You were having sex with my wife and you are actually Joseph's father?"
Redcorn and Nancy nodded, clearly ashamed.
Rainbow Dash stared at Dale, seeing what his reaction might be.
Derpy looked at Mark, who shrugged.
Cotton raised an eyebrow.
Dale stood there for a minute.
Slowly, he formed a demented smile, similar to Twilight's when she had to find a lesson to report to Celestia.
Dale let out a laughter.
Cotton cringed. It was a far more demented laughter than the one from the forest.
"I've been cheated on this entire time!" Dale shouted insanely, his smile still on his face.
He continued laughing and falling to the ground, jumping up and down.
Everypony in town stared at Dale.
"I think ya broke Gribble." Cotton told Redcorn and Nancy.
Dale immediately knocked down every stall and started tripping everypony he saw.
He stole a jacket from one of the stalls and wore it.
He flew to the empty schoolhouse and started writing on the chalkboard, "Rusty was Here. Go Watch Don't Mine at Night."
He flew to the playground and went to the sandbox. He grabbed a good amount of sand and put it in the pockets of jacket.
He flew to Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. He shoved them into a puddle of mud.
"Hey Tiara." Dale said with his sadistic smile. "POCKET SAND!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!"
He grabbed some sand and threw it at Diamond's eyes.
She screamed and covered her eyes.
He then flew around, creating havoc.
"So! What now?" Cotton said,
"We gotta find a way to make him calm down!" Rainbow Dash said.
Mark grabbed some cigarettes he had personally kept for himself.
"I'll try to calm him down." He said as he flew to Dale.
Dale was busy writing "BUTTON MASHxSWEETIE BELLE" on a wall, right next to a picture of a scepter with Twilight's head on top, which he also drew on the wall.
Mark landed next to Dale. "Hey Dale! Look! Smokes!" He said as he grabbed a cigarette and showed it to Dale.
Dale stared at it and took out twenty other cigarettes he had.
Mark blinked. He'd forgotten Dale had cigarettes.
Dale, however, smiled insanely and jumped on top of Mark.
"Hey let go of me!" Mark shouted.
"Mark!" Derpy shouted with a scared look on her face.
"Mark Walsh! No!" Cotton said as he ran towards Mark and Dale.
To his surprise, Dale was then jump-kicked by a green and blue striped unicorn. He had a white and black mane and a grey tail. He was wearing a headband on his head and was equipped a wooden pole. His Cutie Mark was the pole that he had.
Dale got up and growled. "That's it. Prepare to be destroyed by a lethal, dangerous, forbidden combination of the deadly arts of Tai Chi, Kung Fu, Ba Gua, Krav Maga, Taekwondo, Capoeira, Street Fighting, Wrestling, and Pega-Fu! Monkey Style - Squirrel Tactic - Alicorn-"
Dale is immediately interrupted when the unicorn then shot a beam at Dale.
Dale then fell to the ground, snoring.
Mark walked up to the unicorn. "Hey thanks Mr...um..."
The unicorn turned around and stared at Mark.
Mark was surprised when he saw that the unicorn's right eye was actually a reddish glass eye.
The unicorn let out a grateful smile. "I finally found you...Mark Walsh."
"That voice...that eye..." Mark said as he put a hoof on his chin.
His eyes widen.
Costa Rica
Four Weeks Before the End of the World.
A young man was surrounded by four thieves in an alleyway
He had a reddish glass eye.
One of the thieves was holding a wallet.
"Please! Don't! My sister needs that money! Or else she'll die! I swear! PLEASE!"
The thieves just laughed. "Likely story." One of them said as he walked away, along with the other thieves.
"NO! PLEASE, MY SISTER IS PREGNANT AND IN DEBT! NO! PLEASE NO! NOOO!" The young adult shouted as he flew to the ground.
Just before the thieves left the alley, the one who had the wallet bumped into Mark.
"Please!" The young adult shouted. "They have my wallet!"
"Is that so?" Mark said as he quickly snatched the wallet from the thief.
Immediately, all the thieves took out a switchblade.
One tried to stab Mark, but Mark punched him in the stomach and threw a trash bin at him, knocking out the thief.
Another tries to attack, but Mark dodged and punched him in the face, knocking him out.
Another charged at Mark, but Mark kicked him in the stomach and threw him at a wall.
The last one tried to flee, but Mark grabbed his throat. "Mark Walsh." Mark said with a grin. "Remember my name." He said before h knocked out the guy.
Mark then threw the wallet next to the young man.
"Here you go. Crap. I'm gonna be late." Mark said as he looked at his watch.
Mark ran away. The young man tried to run after him to thank him but he didn't know where Mark was now.
The young man let out a tear. "Thank you...Mark...Walsh...I swear I'll thank you...somehow..."
Mark gasped. "I gave you your wallet."
The unicorn let out a tear. "I was able to save my pregnant sister with the money. She then had a son. I don't know what his name was, since the world ended."
The unicorn looked at the Everfree Forest.
"I spent my time, training under a zebra named Zecora, still thinking about you. Eventually, I found out that you lived here in Ponyville."
He bowed. "Thank you. You saved more than my life, you saved my sister and her son."
Mark scratched the back of his head. "Um...My pleasure...um..."
"Ben Long." The unicorn said.
Mark smiled. "You're welcome Ben Long."
"Excuse me!" Cotton shouted. "Mind telling me what ya did to Gribble."
"I used a spell that will revert him back to normal. Should work."
Dale immediately woke up, yawning.
"Woah. What happened? I remember Nancy and Redcorn telling me that they had an affair, and then I woke up! I fainted, right?" Dale said with a nervous grin.
Everypony in town looked at each other and shrugged. They all nodded.
Cotton chuckled as he saw Diamond Tiara giving a glare at Dale. "Doesn't pay to be a bully, doesn't it?" He said to Diamond Tiara, whose only response is a raspberry.
"Oh and Redcorn and Nancy, I forgive you." Dale said.
"WHAT?-!" Redcorn, Nancy, Mark, Derpy, Rainbow Dash, and Cotton said at the same time.
"Just like that?" Mark said as he shook his head.
"John Redcorn's still a friend and Nancy's still my wife. As long as he's sorry and promises never to have sex with wife, and she's sorry and promises never to have sex with him, I forgive them both. Besides, at least I know that Redcorn's not gay, Joseph's not a alien, and that Nancy was impregnated by aliens." Dale said with a smile.
"Now I gotta find out more about Charlene..." He said to himself.
Cotton just rolled his eyes.
"Dis turned out OK...for everyone else that is..."
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Cotton Hill in Equestria? This can't end well...
Over fiddy
menfavorites! Thanks everypony!My god, this Ben Long's design is like, OC incarnate. He's just missing wings and a completely resolved backstory.
3637540
Eh I wasn't thinking well. If the readers don't like Ben, I wouldn't mind killing him off. Though Mark and Kenny will be spared.
3638215
No, it's nothing bad, just damn, the design I'm seeing is just mismatched enough that it's weird. The guy is five different colors after all, excluding butt-tattoo.
3638240
Oh, OK. Eh, not everyone who enters Equestria looks normal.
3638242
I wouldn't be surprised, there are only so many colors you can use, and Rainbow Dash is about half of them if you change the lighting.
3638248
You should look at the main character of this story
SweetieMash for the win!
Glad Dale forgave them.