Every year ponies display their sexual prowess by competing in the Ponymon league. This year, Dash aims to train her own pony and win the championship. Arriving to Twilight’s library late, there is only one ponymon left for her to choose. . .
Disturbing thus far, but in a hilarious way. I can't help but wonder how many fetish balls there are. Can they be customized? Programmed with new scenarios? Take out the mind rape, and you basically have a personal VR system. It's quite intriguing.
Also, I can't help but notice that Granny Smith isn't a part of the provisional Ponydex, nor does Scootaloo's typing match the chart. You may want to address that. Oh, and it would appear that it is flat out impossible to complete the Ponydex, because the trainer would have to capture herself.
it will kill my heart if you do this but I need to tell you that there is a fan name for a filly nnm, its nix from past sins.... why am I telling you this? also i like what you did with molestia was funny
151... you actually cataloged 151 names for this monstrosity. Not sure whats worse, you put in the effort to get these names, or that I actually read them.
Hmm, Rule 5 needs some clarification. Obviously, Gym leaders and possibly even Gym trainers would be exempt. Also, if a trainer is defeated by another trainer, what happens to their Ponymon? Do those transfer, too, are they released into the wild, or are they turned back into ponies?
I had to turn half my brain off to get through that Granny scene. Nothing could be imagined in detail, or would get nightmares.
I mean seriously, imagine this:
Your rancy old grandma is anal-voring your favorite pet, which then is exploding inside your granny's stomache.
I... just... don't even.......
But the glossary was fucking golden. Seriously. I think that thing particular can also be used beyond this story to spread laughter. Photo Finish -> Quick Finish -> Instant Finish. Someone dare to tell me this isn't Hollywood humor there.
I'd be sorely tempted to say trying another fic in this universe without the meta-trolling would be awesome, but I'd be equally worried it would fall flat. By playing it straight but tongue in cheek, this story does a lot to subvert the fridge horror aspect of pokemon.
Similarly, I wonder what a ponymon cutie mark would be, but I also find the idea of Scoots evolving and still being a blank flank equally hilarious.
2814952 Never actually saw "American Pie." Tried to find the relevant clip online, found out that actress went on to play Lily on How I Met Your Mother, which instantly made that part of my headcanon for the show. From now on, I will think Lily went to band camp and did freaky things there.
29 Lyrape At first I read that as "Lyr ape" and thought that it was a funny play on words focusing on Lyra's fanon obsession with humans. The I realized it was "Ly rape." Different creature, that.
2813810 There's a damn good reason Shining Armor moved all the way to the Crystal Kingdom in the frozen north. You try being the consort of three horny princesses for an entire month every year. Poor stallion couldn't stand up straight for months.
2815441 Indeed I am, but I have a super horrible memory. I only remember useless trivia in case I end up on a game show, and where I put my dick. It helps that my dick is attached. One second.... yep, still got it.
Anyway, I'll take you up on that offer. At some point I really need to put a list on GDOCS of my editors and what they edit. I'll probably blog later today "Editors, tell me which stories you want to edit and time zone (GMT+- X)."
I hate to be impatient, but the only joy in my life is writing 10k words a day, posting them the same day, and waking up in the morning to over 9000 comments.
2815707 I was going to go into a lot more depth in it for fun, but I wasn't sure people would like it. Let me improv what "could have been" :
One year ago, Dash is in Pinkie's Ponymon ball. . .
NSFW Dash woke up where she always did after passing out from orgasm-induced exhaustion: the slab of wood in Pinkie's basement. There were splinters in the wood digging into her back, and meat hooks yanking back on her wings.
Pinkie came in and Dash found herself dripping wet, tugging at her bonds to increase the pain. She had been through this so many times the slightest pain felt pleasurable to her deluded mind. She barely heard the words coming out of her mouth as she chopped off her wings, drove red hot nails through her limbs, and electrocuted her.
She came while her spleen was being pulled out, and mused at how odd that was. The Ponymon ball cut to the next scened. Dash was trapped in the icing of a cupcake, just another decoration.
Pinkie bit into the cupcake, and Dash felt her teeth squeezing her. Her tongue rolled Dash around, eventually finding her clit. The large tongue milked the miniature pegasus until she came again, then Pinkie swallowed.
The wet confines of her throat massaged her on the way down, until Dash landed with a splash in the stomach. Soon, the walls began to churn and rub against Dash. Her skin tingled and her feathers and fur fell off. The stomach walls pinned her under the stomach acid, and she had another orgasm as she lost conciousness.
She woke up in the final stage of the Ponymon ball's sadistic, yet orgasmic, journey. She was in a tight, hot, dark tube being squeezed from all sides. Her body felt like jello, and then there was a large contraction, much harder than the rest.
Dash saw the light as Pinkie Pie shit her out onto the floor. She laid there in a steaming pile, curled up onto herself, and rode out several orgasms as she cooled off. In mere moments, she would wake up back on the slab in Pinkie's basement.
@someone: The only way to catch them all is to catch themselves after catching the other 150.... genius! All 151 could live in the day care, having lots of sex, and nopony to turn them back.
2813726 I just google image searched "net ball" and found the second image. The first image was searching "pokeball"
2814022 If it makes you feel better, the odds of more flesh-slapping anal-vore is 20% lower for future chapters.
2815721 Oh, and to your comment on how Dash got out: I left it vague so the reader could imagine it. The two ways to get out are this: 1.) Physically kick the ball open before it restrains you (a.k.a. the instant failure to capture a non-weakened opponent.) 2.) Do not reach orgasm and resist it's influence for a set amount of time. (The 'three shakes', and then they pop out and it goes 'oh, so close!')
2815916 I shall never stop until everyone's sides are in outer space!
2815096 I'm not sure about multiple things so I'm gonna essentially spell it out. Apple pie is basically the "all American pie". That's what ties it into apples. As for the sex pun, the full line from the movie is "This one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy." Hopefully this clears up any confusion that you/anyone else reading this might have. If you weren't confused about any of this then I'm sorry for wasting your time.
PS: I just remembered that in (I believe) Ponies: the anthology, they made this joke with Applebloom. Sooo. Yeah.
i think you may have listed mayor mare twice, at 95 as mayor mare and at 112 as may-or, i could be wrong but thought you might wanna know. otherwise really well done.
I give up. I can only express my frustration and sit back and watch in horrified awe, like a slow motion train wreck full of east european fetish magazines.
2818813 Sheer audacity is the only reason I'm writing it. That, and pent up sexual frustration.
2818503 Thank you for the compliment! Nopony like watching a train that isn't crashing. It's just like Nascar: You watch it for the crash, not the 400 right turns each driver makes.
I hope you are making a 152-300 because you forgot Berry Punch, Sapphire Shores, Rumble, Fleetfoot, Rapidfire, Surprise, Apple Fritter, Red Delicious, Red Gala, Golden Delicious, Caramel, Flim&Flam, Flash Sentry, Night Light, Babs Seed, Lucky, Wildfire, and Carrot Top. Those are just off the top of my head right now. Also are you going to have Daring Do in your story? Oh and one more thing one of the shadowbolts is named descent. I feel like a MLP Wiki. LOL
good sir after reading your story i would like to ask for your permission so i can write a side fic to it, i have ideas just running threw my mind rite now
2813082
Shouldn't it be "Filatiotaloo" ?
2813146
MADNESS!
I love this story! its just so silly!
*Drinks Soda* Hmm, predictable chapter so far...
*Saggy Smith Appears*
Arg! My nose! Carbonated water does not go in the nose!
My god. You.... You batshit crazy guy...
You MADE them all into... I'm impressed.
~Skeeter The Lurker
...
Just...
I don't even know.
I'm somewhat surprised I didn't see "Cherry Popper" amongst Cheeralie's evolutions.
Disturbing thus far, but in a hilarious way. I can't help but wonder how many fetish balls there are. Can they be customized? Programmed with new scenarios? Take out the mind rape, and you basically have a personal VR system. It's quite intriguing.
Also, I can't help but notice that Granny Smith isn't a part of the provisional Ponydex, nor does Scootaloo's typing match the chart. You may want to address that.
Oh, and it would appear that it is flat out impossible to complete the Ponydex, because the trainer would have to capture herself.
I see no Cloud Kicker on this list...
Moondancer has the most non-sexual evolution names.
Ohhhh hot dayum! I haven't laughed that hard after reading in a long while! Love love love the evolution names bwahahaha
I come to suspect that it's possible to capture two pokemons in one ball right? I'm talking about the Spa Ponies.
it will kill my heart if you do this but I need to tell you that there is a fan name for a filly nnm, its nix from past sins....
why am I telling you this?
also i like what you did with molestia was funny
151... you actually cataloged 151 names for this monstrosity.
Not sure whats worse, you put in the effort to get these names, or that I actually read them.
damn it, i was hoping that blueblood would be like magikarp... but without evoulution... hahaha... ahhhh he's a prick.
you win... this hits my favs
2813381
Not so loud. Somebody might hear you and then the whole thing will be for naught.
I lost it
This is like the fried twinkie of fanfics.
It's bad for you and doesnt even sound appetizing and you just feel bad afterward.
But damnit if it isn't delicious while you eat it.
Hmm, Rule 5 needs some clarification. Obviously, Gym leaders and possibly even Gym trainers would be exempt. Also, if a trainer is defeated by another trainer, what happens to their Ponymon? Do those transfer, too, are they released into the wild, or are they turned back into ponies?
I had to turn half my brain off to get through that Granny scene. Nothing could be imagined in detail, or would get nightmares.
I mean seriously, imagine this:
Your rancy old grandma is anal-voring your favorite pet, which then is exploding inside your granny's stomache.
I... just... don't even.......
But the glossary was fucking golden. Seriously. I think that thing particular can also be used beyond this story to spread laughter. Photo Finish -> Quick Finish -> Instant Finish. Someone dare to tell me this isn't Hollywood humor there.
2814022
I'd be sorely tempted to say trying another fic in this universe without the meta-trolling would be awesome, but I'd be equally worried it would fall flat. By playing it straight but tongue in cheek, this story does a lot to subvert the fridge horror aspect of pokemon.
Similarly, I wonder what a ponymon cutie mark would be, but I also find the idea of Scoots evolving and still being a blank flank equally hilarious.
I applaud you, for such creative and amazing writing
We're all mad here.
love the ponydex, will milky way show up as a trainer, a wild pony, or other?
2813156 you know what made my day and the music I listened to when reading this?
dubstep on everything!!!!!!!
please continue this story
Applebloom's evolution has, quite possibly, the best name there.
2814654
A-mare-ican Pie?
2814767 This may help
"This one time, at band camp..."
Omg this story is funny an awesome :)
2814952
Never actually saw "American Pie." Tried to find the relevant clip online, found out that actress went on to play Lily on How I Met Your Mother, which instantly made that part of my headcanon for the show. From now on, I will think Lily went to band camp and did freaky things there.
U mad?
2814767 drove my chevy to the levi but the levi was dry
giggety
the type chart dosent say which type is effective against the others
ex:
Pegasus
earth +
is earth good vs Pegasus or pegaus good vs earth
29 Lyrape
At first I read that as "Lyr ape" and thought that it was a funny play on words focusing on Lyra's fanon obsession with humans. The I realized it was "Ly rape." Different creature, that.
Please stop
I am dying
Lungs not functioning
I cannot stop laughing
Oh my holy fucking hell
This
This is pure genius
My sides are broken
All of my yes
One of the stories you can't avoid, no matter what
Totallyrape sounds like a fun Ponymon.
2816417 Thanks :D
2813342
That's one of Cherry Jubilee's evolutions.
2813381
Unf. Personal VR system. I need to go find me some bondage balls (and there are every kind, even a master ball out there somewhere...)
2813575 2813437
Don't worry, I'm sure nothing else creepy will happen.
2813439
Cloud Kicker + Granny Smith aye. I'm going to have to start 152-300 later today...
2813558
And they say I'm not funny. I'm plenty funny, I just have a twisted sense of humor.
2813894
Fixed
2813810
There's a damn good reason Shining Armor moved all the way to the Crystal Kingdom in the frozen north. You try being the consort of three horny princesses for an entire month every year. Poor stallion couldn't stand up straight for months.
2815441
Indeed I am, but I have a super horrible memory. I only remember useless trivia in case I end up on a game show, and where I put my dick. It helps that my dick is attached. One second.... yep, still got it.
Anyway, I'll take you up on that offer. At some point I really need to put a list on GDOCS of my editors and what they edit. I'll probably blog later today "Editors, tell me which stories you want to edit and time zone (GMT+- X)."
I hate to be impatient, but the only joy in my life is writing 10k words a day, posting them the same day, and waking up in the morning to over 9000 comments.
2815707
I was going to go into a lot more depth in it for fun, but I wasn't sure people would like it. Let me improv what "could have been" :
One year ago, Dash is in Pinkie's Ponymon ball. . .
@someone:
The only way to catch them all is to catch themselves after catching the other 150.... genius! All 151 could live in the day care, having lots of sex, and nopony to turn them back.
2816167
Indeed, she is even a shiny one!
2813726
I just google image searched "net ball" and found the second image. The first image was searching "pokeball"
2814022
If it makes you feel better, the odds of more flesh-slapping anal-vore is 20% lower for future chapters.
2815721
Oh, and to your comment on how Dash got out: I left it vague so the reader could imagine it. The two ways to get out are this:
1.) Physically kick the ball open before it restrains you (a.k.a. the instant failure to capture a non-weakened opponent.)
2.) Do not reach orgasm and resist it's influence for a set amount of time. (The 'three shakes', and then they pop out and it goes 'oh, so close!')
2815916
I shall never stop until everyone's sides are in outer space!
2813592
As much as _I_ hate to tell you…
Nyx is clearly the MOST evolved form of the NMM ponymon
Because of how clearly wrongity-wrong that would be!
Whorin’ Soarin - That is all.
2815096 I'm not sure about multiple things so I'm gonna essentially spell it out. Apple pie is basically the "all American pie". That's what ties it into apples. As for the sex pun, the full line from the movie is "This one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy." Hopefully this clears up any confusion that you/anyone else reading this might have. If you weren't confused about any of this then I'm sorry for wasting your time.
PS: I just remembered that in (I believe) Ponies: the anthology, they made this joke with Applebloom. Sooo. Yeah.
i think you may have listed mayor mare twice, at 95 as mayor mare and at 112 as may-or, i could be wrong but thought you might wanna know. otherwise really well done.
You used the name Lyrape. I feel privlaged.
I give up. I can only express my frustration and sit back and watch in horrified awe, like a slow motion train wreck full of east european fetish magazines.
2818813
Sheer audacity is the only reason I'm writing it. That, and pent up sexual frustration.
2818503
Thank you for the compliment! Nopony like watching a train that isn't crashing. It's just like Nascar: You watch it for the crash, not the 400 right turns each driver makes.
And this trainwreck hasn't even begun to burn.
I hope you are making a 152-300 because you forgot Berry Punch, Sapphire Shores, Rumble, Fleetfoot, Rapidfire, Surprise, Apple Fritter, Red Delicious, Red Gala, Golden Delicious, Caramel, Flim&Flam, Flash Sentry, Night Light, Babs Seed, Lucky, Wildfire, and Carrot Top. Those are just off the top of my head right now. Also are you going to have Daring Do in your story? Oh and one more thing one of the shadowbolts is named descent. I feel like a MLP Wiki. LOL
There can only be one Ponymon Champion.
good sir after reading your story i would like to ask for your permission so i can write a side fic to it, i have ideas just running threw my mind rite now