I Wrote Another Thing · 6:20pm Jul 10th, 2020
On Monday, Twilight overslept by fifteen minutes, ate some pancakes Spike left in the kitchen for her, went to Sugar Cube Corner to get muffins, and spent the rest of the day reading until it was time for her friends to come over. The visit was nice. They played Monopoly.
On Tuesday, Twilight checked Ponygram.
#LazyMorning tagged her latest picture; #SelfCare. The image depicted her sprawled out in bed, head rolled back, sheets tangled around her. Faint rays of golden light artistically graced the sheets and her skin alike, and by their presence it clear that she was asleep long after the sun had come up. A line of drool ran down the side of her cheek, clear enough in its presence to make her appear unpresentable. And yet, she was not unkempt. Her tail was splayed out just so as to catch to light, her colors popped, her wing muscles stood out beneath her angile frame, and if her mane unbrushed and wild, it was wild in a way that made stallions think of what else might tangle her sheets.
It had six-hundred likes and twenty-two comments. A stallion she didn’t know called her, “Hot.” So she decided to switch to her blog. Ponygram was vapid anyway.
“DRAGON SLAVERY,” her post from that evening read, “OR, HOW I LEARNED TO CHECK MY PONY PRIVILAGE.” It was ten-thousand words long, talked about the history of race in Equestria, marxist economics, and for some reason, very strong opinions on rent control. It had pictures of Spike slaving away over a hot stove, then warming himself on the stove because he hadn’t been provided adequate clothing to support his cold-blooded lifestyle.
It had 812 shares, and had been republished in the Manehatten Times. Other blogs were calling it, “A stark yet heartwarming picture of the life of the royal family. Proof that #PrincessTwilight is flawed yet relatable.”
So Twilight decided to just go on Ponybook. Who read blogs anymore anyway?
“Getting down with my girls!” her latest post read, beneath a collection of pictures of them together. The monopoly board was, for the most part, strategically cropped out, allowing the picture to focus on all of them clinking their cider glasses together and being terribly photogenic. The one exception was a picture of Rarity considering a pile of monopoly money with an smile that might be described as “scheming.”
It was tagged #ElementofGenerosity #FutureMinisterofCoin #LikesCoins. The commenters were worried that Twilight was drinking so heavily on a Monday.
But they did share the post on their walls.
After a moment, Twilight looked up and over her shoulder. Behind her hovered a small purple quadcopter drone. It even had writing on the side. “Twilight’s Drone.” In case she lost it.
It’s camera flashed. Her phone beeped.
“Lol. Too lazy to find a mirror, using a smartphone to fix my mane. #ModernProblems #LazyTuesday #FilterTime.”
The drone had photoshopped out her mole, and removed the stray hairs from her bangs. So that was nice.
That afternoon, Twilight had lunch planned with Rarity and Rainbow Dash. “I think social media might be bad for us.”
“Don’t touch anything yet,” Rarity pushed the two of them away from the table, her horn glowing as she fiddled with her smartphone. The cafe had brought them hay toast, honied oats, tea and little cakes. “I haven’t finished taking pictures of the food.”
“Send me those.” Rainbow sighed, putting her own phone away. “Your camera is better than mine.”
“Ordering the alfalfa cakes was brilliant.” Rarity adjusted her phone, floating it this way and that, tilting it around the table. “They taste like soap but they look amazing next to the teapot.”
The camera attached to Twilight’s Drone flashed. All three of the girls’ phones beeped at once. Rarity immediately checked hers, while Rainbow struggled to quickly pull her own from her saddlebags.
“Very nice,” Rarity cooed. “Cropped my phone out. Got me looking up at the clouds. The rest of the cafe in the background. We appear positively heavenly.”
“Yeah,” Rainbow agreed. “I look like, cultured and stuff. That drone is great.”
“Right, but is it though?” Twilight frowned. “Like really, is it?”
Oh You
Suspension of disbelief shattered. You really expect me to believe Twilight misspelled that?
Or perhaps it's a subtle indicator of the damaging impact of social media. Hmm...
Hey! We're supposed to be writing fantasy, not reality. Go back and make it less believable.
What does princess twilight have against #moles? they're #positivelyadorable. Shame on her for catering to the incessant whims of pop fashion. #polydactylpride
“Right, but is it thought?” Twilight frowned. “Like really, is it?”
Did you mean though?
So is a blog post the way to post stories of less than 1000 words now?
And since this is my first communication with GapJaxie, I should probably SQUEEEEE on general principles.
5305312
I did, have have corrected the typo you so helpfully highlighted!
More like it's my way to post something that I'll never turn into a story, but that I enjoyed writing and that I think people might enjoy reading. I do this from time to time.
Hey you! I'm glad you like my stories. :D
Twilight doesn't seem too pleased with the drone and none of the others have one. Possibly a gift for being a princess? I can see Celestia insisting on the importance of being relatable with her subjects. Good PR could have prevented the whole Nightmare Moon debacle!
I can't shake the feeling that this is all metaphor for the fandom: is it right to have so many adult voyeurs peeping into a child's fantasy world?
If that is indeed the question...I have no answer, no comment, and an urgent appointment I just now remembered.
lol this was pretty good.
"presence it clear that she"
"presence it was clear that she"?
"her angile frame"
I did not find much in the way of definitions for that word; are you sure it's what you meant?
"and if her mane unbrushed and"
"and if her mane was unbrushed and"?
"PRIVILAGE"
...I mean, yes, text-dialogue, but also Twilight. Is it supposed to be spelled that way?
(Though I see that FoME already pointed this out, and unlike another already-spotted typo, you didn't change it... so I'm guessing this one, at least, was deliberate, and FoME's hypothesis regarding the reason seems plausible.)
"was ten-thousand words"
"was ten thousand words"?
You appear to have inconsistent capitalization of "Monopoly".
"with an smile"
"with a smile"?
...Kind of starting to wonder if the "typos" are deliberate, though.
"It’s camera flashed"
"Its camera flashed"?
"anything yet,”"
"anything yet.”"?
"tea and little cakes"
"tea, and little cakes"?
(Though that, of course, is if you want to use the Oxford Comma.)
Also: :)
There is entirely too much punctuation in that sentence.
It would be sufficient to write:
Or for emphasis:
The quotation marks are redundant since you have just told your reader that these are someone else's words.
And for the love of Strunk and White, what is that comma doing there? No no no no no no NO Oh mama mia! Mama mia!
Lol, that was #tooreal
I win.
assets.rbl.ms/17689313/origin.png
Also, you can buy unit insignia:
cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0742/9831/products/CBP_AMO_Droney_Patch_1200x1200.png?v=1540337436