It's been some time, hasn't it? (Addendum added) · 5:11am Aug 21st, 2016
A friend of mine, who's changed his name so many times on here that it ceases to matter who he is, recently asked me to be the 69th downvote on his fic "for the lulz", as the kids would say. So, I indulged him. Having finished the deed, I went to logout of FiMFic, planning on slinking back into the night. Something stopped me, though, and instead I clicked (somewhat narcissisticly) on my own profile. I spent an hour or so just reading over old comments on fics that feel like they were written decades ago, in a different time, a different age. In many ways, they were. I'm not the same person I was when I wrote "Live Free or Reinhard", or when "Unread Letters From a Friend at the End of the World" unceremoniously ended without so much as a whimper of defeat.
I think, necessarily, I have changed so much since I started writing fanfiction on here, that it feels like I'm reading someone else's words when I skim over my old fics, laugh at the stupid jokes or the silly writing. There's a part of me that feels like I'm peering into the past, at a different life, but another part of me that recognizes that there's still some of the guy who wrote about Scootaloo dying over and over again in myself today. I still have the same sense of humor (more or less), and I still find it endlessly amusing to see things through the eyes of incompetent characters, but I just don't have the same passion for writing as I once did. It's an odd state of affairs really. If, by some twist of fate, I wrote another fic today, it wouldn't be penned by alexmagnet. It would be written by "The Artist Formerly Known as 'alexmagnet'".
Hell, I'll be honest and say I don't even know why I'm writing this blogpost right now. I was reading over comments on my old fics, and it got me feeling all nostalgic, and then the comments on my profile page as well. I still get PM's from time to time, mostly just asking for permission to translate a story, but occasionally I get people asking where I'm at. I feel bad, but I've ignored most of them. This blog post is not an attempt to make up for that, or to really apologize for anything. As I said, I don't know what it's for. For the first time in a long time, I just felt like writing something. Hell, I may not even post this. I just wanted to write.
For the people who are curious, and those who are not, but have read this far anyway, I'm finally fulfilling a lifelong goal soon. As of writing this, I will be moving to Japan to live with my fiance in 5 days time. Obviously, this is quite the life event, but even beyond the obvious layer of it, this will forever change who I am. There will be the Alex from before living in Japan, and then there will be the Alex from after. Maybe it's the combination of this weird feeling and the nostalgia from FiMFic that's got me in a writing mood. I have this profound sense of longing to be with my fiance again, and yet an equally profound sense of fear and anticipation at a life not yet lived. It's terrifying, exciting, incredible, and scary all at once to know that I'm about leave everything I've ever known behind. It's not the first time I've lived outside of the United States, but before I was still with my family, and now I'll be on my own. Well, not quite on my own. I'll have the most amazing person I've ever known living with me, and that's far more than a small comfort. Still though, I can't help but feel a connection to Heinlein's Stranger, and Japan is very much a Strange Land.
Anyway, I'm very much just rambling from thought to thought here, but since I mentioned old comments before I figured I'd say this. Even though I left so many things unfinished, and so many stupid, stupid fics unwritten, I do want to say that I felt like I had a good run. I can look back on everything I created and say that I feel very proud of it. I mean, in a lot of ways, it's sort of amazing, isn't it? I don't mean that in an arrogant, or narcissistic way, but seriously, look at this entire website. Isn't it kind of incredible what was created here? Without FiMFic, there are 4 unbelievable years that I wouldn't have all these memories of, or hell, not just memories but actual recorded histories of. It's a bizarre, sort of unbelievable thing, right? I guess what I'm saying is that even though I've moved on from this period of my life, I'm still grateful for everything it gave me, including some really great friends and a lot of great memories.
Boy, this is a rambly post. I guess this is why stream-of-consciousness writing never got all that big. In any case, I suppose the point of all this guff is to say that even though I'm gone, and I don't really plan on coming back at this point, I want to say thanks to everyone here who ever supported me. 6 years on and I still feel compelled to come back to this damn website, haha. I love all of you, in a really sincere and heartfelt way. I may have left FiMFic, but hopefully you'll be happy knowing that I'm happy. I'm engaged to the love of my life, and living out my childhood fantasy of moving to Japan. What more could I ask for?
BTW, Trixie is still far and away the best pony. Also, I felt a brief, yet incredibly strong, urge to write a new fic when I started playing No Man's Sky. That game is pure writing crack
As requested, here is some closure on Lettters.
What follows is a brief outline of the ending I had planned for the Letters series, as well as what my immediate plans for the current chapters had been. Major spoilers ahead, so read at your own risk.
The first chapter of Unread Letters introduces two new characters, Starkad and The Warden. These two have a lot of history, and specifically Starkad was going to have an elaborate, but only hinted at, backstory. They were to be central to the plot of Unread Letters but acting more as a backdrop to Trixie’s story. The Warden wanted to war with the drakes, and Starkad was smart enough to realize it would be suicide. However, he had his own agenda. He wanted The Warden to start a war so that he could stab The Warden in the back and either show him to be incompetent and take his place, or put him a position to be “heroically” killed in battle so Starkad could take his place. Either way, Starkad was gunning for his office. Trixie was to have very little to do with this, except that she would be occasionally visited by Starkad to be questioned and probed for information further. The main effect Starkad and The Warden’s story would have on Trixie is that she was trapped in Frostvale because of it. While trapped in the city, she was going to take a job as an apprentice blacksmith forging armor. I’m not sure how well it came across in the story, but Trixie was meant to be focused entirely around protecting others. All her spells are defensive, and she takes up blacksmithing to learn how to build armor to protect others. This would come into play later when her and Twilight would meet up. But more on that in a bit. The long story short with Frostvale was that I was going to have most of Unread Letters build up to a great war between the ponies of that city and the drakes, with Trixie and her friends escaping during the cover of battle. While the city fought, Twilight and Co. would arrive to see Frostvale aflame and assume the worst.
Beyond that, I hadn’t planned much until later one when Trixie would be travelling north with Corona and Polaris (who would have nearly given up on life, only to have Trixie pull him back). While Trixie and Co. are making their way through the mountains, fighting creatures along the way, including a cool idea I had for “bonewolves”, Twilight and Co. would be very quickly catching up until they would eventually meet. Twilight tries to convince Trixie to give up her quest and come back, but Trixie refuses, and Twilight eventually is persuaded to join her and see it through. At some point Trixie was going to have another chat with Abraxas (the voice she spoke with after drinking the Dragon’s Eye potion) about more destiny stuff. I should mention at this point that Abraxas is entirely manipulating Trixie for the ultimate goal of turning her into a dragon so that he can bring about a second great coming of dragons to the world. By telling her it’s fate, she feels has to know for sure what her destiny is (btw, the whole point of the entire series was to have this destiny vs. free will conflict, with Trixie ultimately realizing there is no such thing as fate). So, eventually Trixie and Twilight (and the rest) make it through the mountains and reach The End. In this case, it is literally the End of the World, as in the the earth falls away and there is just an impossibly huge set of stairs leading upwards.
Trixie is all ready to bravely forge up the stairs, but Twilight thinks it’s a bad idea. They argue about it, and after some time, Trixie decides that she’ll go it alone and leaves her friends behind, because none of them think it’s a good idea to enter this abyssal portal to an unknown world. After climbing the stairs for an eternity, Trixie finds herself in space above the world, floating for eons, stuck in time. She finally comes across Abraxas, who reveals himself to her by splitting open the moon (as you’ll recall he was, according to legend, sleeping inside the moon). They talk and Abraxas congratulates Trixie for fulfilling her destiny, and then he explains what her purpose is. Trixie, meanwhile, has had loads of time while floating around to think about things, and she recalls all the letters she wrote to Twilight. She starts to regret not listening to her and recklessly entering the portal, so when Abraxas finally speaks to her, she declines his offer to become a dragon and chooses to return to her friends. Abraxas doesn’t want this to happen, so he tries to force Trixie to stay. As this is happening, Twilight, too, has been thinking a lot and decides that she shouldn’t have let Trixie go in by herself, and so she and the rest of the group enter the portal as well and soon find themselves facing off against Abraxas with Trixie. Twilight and Trixie, working together, are able to close the portal to The End and force Abraxas to their world where Tiamat and her drakes are waiting. Then an epic battle ensues and eventually Abraxas is defeated. The series ends with Twilight, Trixie and the rest returning to Ponyville (Corona and Polaris having decided to stay in Frostvale to start new lives), where Trixie takes up residence for a time, eventually realizing that she’s not content, and that her place is, once again, travelling on the open road. She bids farewell to Twilight, promising to visit in the future, and heads off into the distance, with the final line being, “Her tail bobbing up and down as she walked away, the tip of Trixie’s horn was the last bit of her to disappear beyond of the crest of the hill.”
4162490
Can't speak for his stories, but he is right about being the friend. Folks used to call him Nietzsche half a lifetime ago.
Well, we all change.
Hmm.. could just be passing maybe a bit more staying
Well, you just felt like writing, nothing unusual about that.
Nice! I hope you like it in Japan!
Yeah, I can understand that.
Well, even though you've left, I'm glad that your life is at such a high point. Good luck.
It was a joy to know you.
Have a good life.
~Skeeter The Lurker
So long and thanks for all the dead Scootaloos. (But, seriously, I loved reading your work and I wish you all the best with the next chapter of your life).
Good luck in Japan. I lived there for a couple of years, and I had a nice time, all things considered.
Sad to lose ya, but adults understand that them's the breaks.
Adults also understand that the best way to keep a promise, is not to make one.
I can only hope that you've learned the lesson. You'll need it in your upcoming marriage.
Stay safe,
Spade
We change until we die, and then we change in a somewhat different fashion.
Heck, if I hadn't rewritten vast chunks of some of my original fics, I might not recognize them too.
We're going to miss you. Write often.
Before you go... I ask one thing:
An idea of what was planned for Letters.
~Skeeter The Lurker
It has definitely been a long time since you typed here and it's also good to hear your voice once again. Since you mentioned Japan, I might actually have a chance to see you since I lived there before. Right now though, I'm in the Philippines taking engineering classes and I might end up missing you out. Don't worry mate, Japan is a wondrous place. I'm glad you get the chance to live and view the land of the Rising Sun with your fiancé. It makes me happy to hear that from you
As for the life ahead of you, live it to the fullest. I'm joyful that you find that one chance of happiness and I wish you the best of luck no matter what. Maybe when I get a vacation of sorts, I might get the chance to go to Japan and not only live with my family temporarily but to get to see you personally as well. I've been dying to see many of the people who write personally and hearing that you are living in Japan makes me ecstatic. It's a farfetched dream, but one I would love to strive for.
All in all, all I can say is good luck, farewell, and have a wonderful life you humorous man
I'm glad that you're feeling happy at the moment. While I've never visited Japan, it does sound like an interesting place to live in, and I definitely understand how living in a new country can be both exciting and scary at the same time. And that Trixie picture at the end of the blog post is beautiful. She's best pony for a reason, after all.
Also, I do like the idea of just writing for fun, even if it's something that will never be posted. It makes the act of writing more relaxing and therapeutic in a way, but that's just how I view it. Anyway, it's wonderful knowing that things have been going smoothly for you, and I wish you the best of luck wherever you decide to go next.
Good to hear from you. Thanks for stopping by, and best of luck in Japan. (And should that writing urge ever grow completely uncontrollable, well, you know where to find us.
)
wow shit hi hello welcome back goodbye? D: Enjoy the new life! It will be just like your Japanese animes. :V
godspeed. remember you're never truly alone.
know where the embassy is, their numbers and all that. while japan doesn't have that pesky kaiju problem anymore, they still have to contend with them earthquakes and such.
also, travel. not just up and down japan but all of asia, oceania, and china.
we'll keep the lights on for ya here.
4162514
Thanks for understanding
4162527
Haha, yeah, I'm gonna miss killing Scootaloo over and over again.
4162534
I always wondered if someone was gonna call me out on that. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that it happened. But you're right, it was a lesson well learned.
4162547
I won't make any promises (see above reply), but I'll try to make a few posts here and there
4162554
Yes, like many of my unfinished fics, I had the ending completely planned out, but the middle bits were just vague ideas. I wouldn't mind outlining that ending a bit here if you and other people would like that. Maybe it will give some closure, or something.
4162555
I've always wanted to visit the Philippines. Well, I'll be living right in the heart of Tokyo, so if you get a chance, hit me up
4162560
It actually took me quite a while to find that picture, but I'm glad I did. Like you say, there's something about it that just feels so right. I feel a strong connection to it, for whatever reason.
4162728
I heard tell that a few months back that FiMFic might be allowing original fiction, or that there would be a separate site or something like that? If that's true, then I may have one or two ideas that I'd like to put to virtual paper.
4162807
Actually, I was in Japan for a few weeks back in December, and while it wasn't quite like Kill la Kill always led me to believe, it was absolutely incredible. My history nerd-side loved everything about it.
4162879
Whoops, saw your comment after the mass reply refreshed. Now you get your own special reply
While I was in Japan I got to visit Kyoto and Osaka, but the lady and I are planning trips to both Hokkaido and Kyushuu. I'm also definitely planning on visiting Korea and Vietnam, as well as Australia if I can find the time and the money.
4162906
That'd be lovely. If you do want to reveal what was to be, I would be happy.
In all seriousness, I do wish you the best in Japan, and I also hope you plan to pop in and say hi to people you've met here. You may have quit pone, but that's no reason to forget the people, right?
~Skeeter The Lurker
I'm happy you'll be happy, but I'm unhappy Unread goes unfinished. If I were a better writer, I'd offer to continue it for you, but I am not.
4162906
So long, and thanks for all the ponies.
Keep in touch, yeah? I miss talking with you, man.
4162906
I'd like that!
Also, I'm glad to hear from you and wish you all the best in Japan!
Don't be a stranger, buttface.
4162906
Go get yourself into a period drama, that'll do the trick. :D
4162917
I was actually thinking about this. If someone wanted to pick up where I left off, either taking the ending I'll outline later, or writing their own, I would be okay with that. I would really love to see it finished, even if it's not by me
4162937
I noticed you added me on Steam, Floyd. Hit me up on their sometime, all right?
4162990
I'll check into the Skype chat from time to time. In fact, I should pop in at least once more before I leave the US.
4162996
Y'know, I was just thinking I should do that. I couldn't pass for Japanese, but I maybe I could play Commodore Perry?
4162914
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I'll go ahead and write up a short thing about the ending and post it as an addendum to this blog hidden behind a spoiler warning. I'm a little busy today, but I'll ping you guys and let you know when it's been added later tonight.
4162906 in the heart of Tokyo eh? Well that sounds like a blast! If Iget the chance to see that place, sure! I'll be sure to visit once
4163022 Will do. Thinking of getting Overwatch soon, so maybe I'll add you on battle.net if you have it.
4163261
I have it, but only on PS4, unfortunately...
4163022 I'd probably at least give a shot at it from an outline. Might be an interesting thing to see how multiple authors get to the finish line.
Well, on one hand, I'm very sorry to see you go. I very much enjoyed your stories, especially 'Letters'. I might have quibbled with the ending, but I cannot deny that it is a beautiful story. You painted a beautiful world around Trixie, and no matter what, I hope you are proud of what that story accomplished.
But, I am heartened that you'll be leaving us on such a good note, and with so many opportunities in front of you. A new home in a new land, and a partner to share it all with? Who could ask for more?
I wish you and your fiance all the best, and a lifetime of shared memories!
Good luck!
-GMP
PS: Please do stop in once and a while, and let us know how you're doing. We'll miss you terribly, but we'd love to say hello every now and again. ;)
PPS: I too would love to see a synopsis/cliff note version of what you had planned for the 'Letters' sequel.
4163022 hmm, pick it up and run with the ending? Most intriguing!
Is there a good way someone could get in touch with you after you leave? Specifically in regards to the story?
4163836
I'm still working on the write up for the outline I sort of had, but it should be up tomorrow (assuming I'm not too swamped with work).
4164108
The best way to contact me would be either a PM on here (I still check notifications from time to time), or to add me on skype.
4162914
4162972
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4164108
I've added the outline about the ending and some of the plans I had for Unread Letters to the blogpost. Hopefully it provides some closure
Well, it's too bad to see it end up unfinished, but I can't complain too much, I never had that passion for writing in the first place. At least we get a little closure here and at least you're moving onto a happier life and not suddenly vanishing because you were hit by a truck or lost your job and can no longer afford the internet.
4162490
I'd be more convinced were you using proper punctuation and grammar in that statement, I fear. It's much the same for titles and story summaries, really. I see someone trying to get me to read a story who can't even use a period and it's the same as a big red warning light.
4166379
It does. Thank you.
~Skeeter The Lurker
4166379
It does, thank you.
4166379
It genuinely does. Thank you. This one one of the stories I was saddest to see die. You're a talented writer. Please, come back and let us know if you ever elect to create a fully original published work.
I find this post very relatable. Maybe I'll do the same thing and just outline my stories for my own fans. Think of it, my first blog post in, like, 3 years.
Thanks for the super abridged version of Letters. Its quite different from actually reading the true written word. I hope your enjoying Japan with your new life.