Welp, looks like I was right about where you were going with Spike. I was hoping he'd grow from this whole thing and move on. Eh, as long as he's happy I suppose.
This has been one of my consistent favorites on my update list. It is a very well written story, has great backgrounds, isn't just about the "scenes" and really embraces the character's personalities. I will be looking in to any more work you've done, I only wish I could favorite it more than once!
Comment posted by nodamnbrakes deleted Jun 6th, 2013
While I, too, have some reservations about how you treated Spike, I can understand from a storytelling standpoint that some people/dragons are just irredeemably bigoted.
That being said, there are many people who don't and, consequently, hate you for treating Spike "harshly."
Personally, I'd say fuck them. If they wanna read Spike fanfiction where he's awesome and perfect and Rarity is just bouncing up and down on his big ol' dragon cock, they can write such a fic themselves.
I may not like the way Spike was in this fic, but I can appreciate an excellent story even if it has an element I don't like.
I am wondering though - this is "Iron Will vs the Penile Code"... But Iron Will didn't really do anything here... I was sort of hoping that he would play a bigger part. (No pun intended) (really, that was purely coincidental...)
This is an alienating attitude and it's, quite frankly, absurd. The first is abject trolling but it bears answering because these two are related. It's how wars erupt in a fandom. I've pointed out why I particularly didn't like the way Spike was treated, but it's a noted miscommunication between what the author was trying to convey and what we as readers were seeing.
Heretic's suggestion is profoundly insulting. What you are suggesting is extremely unethical. It's insulting to me as a reader to suggest it and extremely insulting to Gabriel as an author to do it. So you may kindly keep your opinion of our attitudes and not so kindly swallow your own fingers.
I like to imagine that the original ending was Spike finding someone that he was happy with, and ultimately parting on good terms with Rarity and the Diamond Dogs before going off to have mindblowing sex with that someone. Then, after the shitstorm over Spike's characterization, Gabriel was all like, "fuck that noise."
On another note, the description of two siblings masturbating on opposite sides of the couch as "innocent and pure" nearly made me choke on my food. The whole scene is just so bizarre already and then you throw that line at me and I can only laugh.
With respect... I know you are trying to be moderate. And truth to tell, I like Spike. In my more normal stories he gets his occasional bone. He still has Peewee, he has mustache priveleges, he's got his own Masonic Lodge of cool dudes that play poker and hang out, and while he isn't dating anyone yet, he's trying and has gotten encouragement from Twilight and the rest. But in this particular story I wanted a hypocritical bureaucrat and there he is. He's not perfect but he is not wholly irredeemable. Just exceptionally unpleasant. But at least he found what works for him. I am oddly pleased you can invest such passion into a review. But... well... moderate your moderation. If that makes sense.
Thank you! All my other stories use a vastly different Headcanon, one that could be descibed as "continuity heavy" as most stories in some way reference elements or implications in others. I realized this when i submitted a story to EqD and started worrying about it not being included because that would preclude other postings that rely on knowing what happened in that one. Slightly complicating matters, a collaborators has made side-stories/expanded world stories as well. It's a lot of text but I like to think it's worth it.
Another end to another excellent work by you, good sir. Always been a fan of your world building and I will unabashedly admit you've influenced my own work. Only wish Luna, Fleur, and Lime had made more of a cameo. The Tea Table has always been my favorite story out of your set.
Kinda wanted a Spike redemption but can understand why you didn't go for it. Not everyone has to get the typical 'happy' ending.
2680893 Also, don't let the parasprite make love to your keyboard. Windows already includes a Sticky Keys function.
Here's why I said what I said. I honestly didn't like how it ended. Kind of left me unsatisfied. But writing that ending you knew that people who gave sympathy to Spike in the story were likely to walk away with a bad taste in their mouth. So there's not much point in me saying things I've already said, and Spike's issues aside, it was a pretty good story and resolved itself pretty much as I thought it would.
But I can complain all I want about Spike's situation, and, to be honest, it won't do me any good. I'm not a customer, I'm a reader. You're an author, not a store manager. I've had similar situations with other stories where the story itself was fine, but had one little thing been changed it would have been fantastic. And I've entertained thoughts on some of these stories of writing my own "alternate ending" to resolve it. But the problem is doing that is extremely dishonest. It's plagiarism, and it's deeply insulting to the author to do it. It's also extremely childish. Yes, I'm unhappy about event A happening when I think it should have been event B. So what. Nothing I can do about it. It's already out there. I can bitch and moan and complain, but it's likely not going to change.
That's why I got angry about his post. What he is suggesting is dishonest and childish. It's also extremely arrogant to suggest it, treating me like I'm a window-licking loser.
okay now that I've read what happen to spike in the epilogue that just made me angry that he now a cuckhold. i mean no redemption no getting the girl no meeting some else just him being a loser. that was just wrong Gabriel just wrong. i know you heard say this several times already but i just really think you could have done better with spike and i really hope you do in future stories
Pretty much already been said, but again this fic couldn't have ended any better. Although some people are pretty skeptical of Spike's outcome. To those out there that are skeptical, look at it this way. There's plenty of fics on this site that cater to a good outcome for Spike, this one ended up being just an exception. It's Gabriel's story, plain and simple.
i was hoping for a plot twist in which Pinkie would enslave Twilight in a basement, i mean, the windowless ban with free candy in it but i guess in this way it was even more funny , at last Twilight got to try the carnal for herself
I do understand. But... I think you see the irony of your statement on a fanfiction site. As well, some things crave adulteration and fixing. Like alternate endings to Cupcakes or Rainbow Factory. I'm fine with that.
That's half the reason I did it. A subversion. I wanted to emphasize the windowless white free candy van aspect to make folks think Cupcakes and groping without consent. But it is actually as cordial as their relationship in the show.
I suppose there are some fics that do. But it feels really dishonest to me. I might not like it but I just feel like there's really nothing I can do about it. I see fanfics as creating your own stories within an already established universe, not changing a story for your own benefit. Fanfics of those sort are typically garbage.
And for the record, I've never read Cupcakes or Rainbow Factory. I hate horror in general.
True, I suppose. I've never done it but I understand the impetus. I managed to avoid Cupcakes but I checked a MSTed version of Rainbow Factory. The only thing I ever "adulterated" or similar was all the works and ideas of Ayn Rand. With perhaps a bit of a pisstake towards ultra-objectivist dorkface Jay Naylor.
well this story has been a very confusing one for me Gabriel well i do like this story quite lot and it the sex scenes are great. the only real complaint is that well you know it already how spike was treated in this story. i mean sersiouly he doesn't get girl and the girl he loves pretty much forgets he exists. that really left a bad taste in my mouth. now i know you don't hate spike but the diamond dogs are jerks to him. sorry for ranting this but it just makes me so mad. but i cant just hate this entire story just because of spike's treatment. it is well done, and i hope to see more of it soon.
Finally bit the bullet and read it, and it was strange. Very, very strange. I feel nothing for or against it. Nice at parts but also slightly disturbing. I give it a 5 out of 10. Not great but not terrible.
Your concluding civility is quite encouraging. You seems to be a very decent, if perhaps overly passionate, fellow with a fixed idea about how Spike should always be treated. Just as a warning: not everyone treats Spike with respect. If you go off in a punching rage every time he is disrespected you will end up tired with bloody knuckles. Try to relax and accept it as the nature of thefanfiction beast.
There will be no more done on this universe, at least not in the forseeable future. But I am glad you enjoyed some parts.
2693655 yeah your right maybe i was too overreacting to it. it because spike is my favorite character on the show and to see him getting treatment like is would make me angry but i understand it your story and you don't hate spike or want to be rude to any one who does.
I'm actually fairly Spike-positive. It's just that most of my story ideas are fixed on places that don't really feature Spike, plus my preferred ship is Fluttershy/Rarity. I really should show off Spike more, but I don't want to just contrive reasons. So I need to really think about it.
The problem is that in your main universe, you haven't simply shipped Rarity away from him, you've shipped off any potential mates he might have. Sweetie's entangled in an awkward relationship with Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom with Zecora (which I still cannot wrap my head around). If you're going to write a story where he gets with someone, you'll need to either use some little known character like Babs Seed or Twist, invent your own character, or one of the other established ones gets broken up (which is extremely unlikely, so that can be scratched). And then you have another issue in your little Hybridizing pamphlet that basically says that a dragon with anyone but a dragon is simply too much trouble biologically for the female. This pretty much crushes any hope of Spike getting together with anything beyond a dragon while having a relationship that is meaningful. You can either play it up as an important romantic point that love can persevere even through that large hurdle, get him with a dragon or else retcon it completely. The fact that dragons were singled out in this instance strikes me as odd anyway.
Part of that is one reason why Spike's fate bothered me somewhat in this fic. He's a bit lonely in your main universe and this story seemed to pile on a bit. The Diamond Dogs didn't receive their comeuppance within the narrative, but I suppose that's not to say it didn't happen away from the printed text, lost in the timeskip. Spike's end is pathetic and depressing. Despite what he might say, he is not happy with his arrangement. I can only imagine Rarity's reaction to it being a mixture of pity for how low he's sunk to utter disgust at the thought of it.
True in a way but not quite. Spike isn't interested in the ones you mentioned. It's clear from the 'Rarity' scenario that he likes mature mares. Owlowicious even advises Peewee of this. And the birthing thing is something he recognized. He would be fine with adoption. The reason dragons get singled out, as you say, is they are very singular. Many times larger than ponies, far longer-lived and with offspring about as large as a pony. It's dangerous if not always fatal to the mother, even leaving aside the question of how the spem will her in her. I suppose if you're really, really fixated on this point I could sent him through what Big Mac went through. The power of the Granter could make it happen.
But about his fate... this may be more values dissonance. I have to think cuckolds know what they're doing, I've conversed with a lot of them. Sure, it makes no sense to you or I that they are satisfied, just like I don't know how a threesome relationship works or how a BDSM relationship works. But I am told it does and absent empirical data to the contrary I must conclude it does.
Little attention? Perhaps it's just because my normal stories get relatively scant attention save for loyal readers (I don't quite attract new folk like this thing) but this got enought attention for my purposes. It made the feature box and has a lot of comments and upthumbs. I'm very glad you like it.
2724310 He wrote a sex scene between a djinn (male) and a cab driver (also male). It didn't even sink in to me how graphic it was until one of them was blowing the other or something, been a while since I read that book. I was like halfway through before it occurred to me that this was pretty damn strange, and a different kind of strange than The Sandman or Coraline. Whenever I don't realize I'm watching something really weird until I'm halfway through it, it reminds me of reading that book.
You know that was one of my favorite parts as well. I love how zany and free she is. Benign (or at least restrained) Discord as the judge is funny and fun to write.
Honestly, just for this story, fuck Spike. The little beta cuck asshole deserves being put in his place and being a forever alone little bitch who's dick will never get wet from real pussy. Fuck all you haters.
8644814 Big Mac and Cheerilee didn't really love each other, their relationship was set up by the Apple family. Turnabout Porn, Part One
Applejack gave Pinkie a deadpan look that bordered on anger. “It ain't that he likes it. Ah'm pleased as peels ta see he ain't shy 'bout procreatin'. Gotta do his part to help propagate the Apple family. But he weren't interested in th' wife the whole family helped him ta court an' land. All he wanted was ta watch porn, 'stead-a doin' his stallionly sire duties an' getting her all good an' knocked up.”
“I see... so it wasn't the pornography, it was just that he married a mare he didn't like. Thank you,” Pinkie said, waving a hoof and hopping away to her desk. “Going to redirect?” Pinkie asked Twilight.
A very sweet and appealing ending to an oddly amusing piece.
Good ending!
I gotta admit, dood. I was worried Twilight might have been forced into one of them sex videos, but she wasn't, so I'm happy, dood.
The rest was also pretty good, dood. Keep it up.
2680501
2680544
2680546
Glad that you all liked the ending and thought it was sort of cute. I was so worried.
Welp, looks like I was right about where you were going with Spike. I was hoping he'd grow from this whole thing and move on. Eh, as long as he's happy I suppose.
Good ending overall.
well this story was okay but still didn't like the way spike was treated but still okay
well, that' a nice "FUCK YOU" to all the people who supported Spike.
i respect that.
*thumb down*
*unfav*
Goodday sir.
This has been one of my consistent favorites on my update list. It is a very well written story, has great backgrounds, isn't just about the "scenes" and really embraces the character's personalities. I will be looking in to any more work you've done, I only wish I could favorite it more than once!
2680620
we should talk on skype or something because you're a genius and i want to make love to your keyboard <3
While I, too, have some reservations about how you treated Spike, I can understand from a storytelling standpoint that some people/dragons are just irredeemably bigoted.
That being said, there are many people who don't and, consequently, hate you for treating Spike "harshly."
Personally, I'd say fuck them. If they wanna read Spike fanfiction where he's awesome and perfect and Rarity is just bouncing up and down on his big ol' dragon cock, they can write such a fic themselves.
2680912 - This
I may not like the way Spike was in this fic, but I can appreciate an excellent story even if it has an element I don't like.
I am wondering though - this is "Iron Will vs the Penile Code"... But Iron Will didn't really do anything here... I was sort of hoping that he would play a bigger part. (No pun intended) (really, that was purely coincidental...)
2680889
2680912
This is an alienating attitude and it's, quite frankly, absurd. The first is abject trolling but it bears answering because these two are related. It's how wars erupt in a fandom. I've pointed out why I particularly didn't like the way Spike was treated, but it's a noted miscommunication between what the author was trying to convey and what we as readers were seeing.
Heretic's suggestion is profoundly insulting. What you are suggesting is extremely unethical. It's insulting to me as a reader to suggest it and extremely insulting to Gabriel as an author to do it. So you may kindly keep your opinion of our attitudes and not so kindly swallow your own fingers.
2681141
THIS nigga.
Heretic's comment is both insulting to authors who make Spike the perfect dragon but also to people who enjoy reading those fanfictions.
May I make a suggestion SLAP MY ASS.
I like to imagine that the original ending was Spike finding someone that he was happy with, and ultimately parting on good terms with Rarity and the Diamond Dogs before going off to have mindblowing sex with that someone. Then, after the shitstorm over Spike's characterization, Gabriel was all like, "fuck that noise."
On another note, the description of two siblings masturbating on opposite sides of the couch as "innocent and pure" nearly made me choke on my food. The whole scene is just so bizarre already and then you throw that line at me and I can only laugh.
Better than being a dog, in my honest opinion.
2680701
Sometimes there are o ideal solutions and some people are just... stuck with something they can get along with, not their dream ideal.
2681172
2681141
With respect... I know you are trying to be moderate. And truth to tell, I like Spike. In my more normal stories he gets his occasional bone. He still has Peewee, he has mustache priveleges, he's got his own Masonic Lodge of cool dudes that play poker and hang out, and while he isn't dating anyone yet, he's trying and has gotten encouragement from Twilight and the rest. But in this particular story I wanted a hypocritical bureaucrat and there he is. He's not perfect but he is not wholly irredeemable. Just exceptionally unpleasant. But at least he found what works for him. I am oddly pleased you can invest such passion into a review. But... well... moderate your moderation. If that makes sense.
2680870
Thank you! All my other stories use a vastly different Headcanon, one that could be descibed as "continuity heavy" as most stories in some way reference elements or implications in others. I realized this when i submitted a story to EqD and started worrying about it not being included because that would preclude other postings that rely on knowing what happened in that one. Slightly complicating matters, a collaborators has made side-stories/expanded world stories as well. It's a lot of text but I like to think it's worth it.
Another end to another excellent work by you, good sir. Always been a fan of your world building and I will unabashedly admit you've influenced my own work. Only wish Luna, Fleur, and Lime had made more of a cameo. The Tea Table has always been my favorite story out of your set.
Kinda wanted a Spike redemption but can understand why you didn't go for it. Not everyone has to get the typical 'happy' ending.
2680893
Also, don't let the parasprite make love to your keyboard. Windows already includes a Sticky Keys function.
new changed. new change.
assembled form candid. assembled from candid.
bull in a vagina shop. That's even more groan-worthy than Orthod-Ox.
2681539
Here's why I said what I said. I honestly didn't like how it ended. Kind of left me unsatisfied. But writing that ending you knew that people who gave sympathy to Spike in the story were likely to walk away with a bad taste in their mouth. So there's not much point in me saying things I've already said, and Spike's issues aside, it was a pretty good story and resolved itself pretty much as I thought it would.
But I can complain all I want about Spike's situation, and, to be honest, it won't do me any good. I'm not a customer, I'm a reader. You're an author, not a store manager. I've had similar situations with other stories where the story itself was fine, but had one little thing been changed it would have been fantastic. And I've entertained thoughts on some of these stories of writing my own "alternate ending" to resolve it. But the problem is doing that is extremely dishonest. It's plagiarism, and it's deeply insulting to the author to do it. It's also extremely childish. Yes, I'm unhappy about event A happening when I think it should have been event B. So what. Nothing I can do about it. It's already out there. I can bitch and moan and complain, but it's likely not going to change.
That's why I got angry about his post. What he is suggesting is dishonest and childish. It's also extremely arrogant to suggest it, treating me like I'm a window-licking loser.
okay now that I've read what happen to spike in the epilogue that just made me angry that he now a cuckhold. i mean no redemption no getting the girl no meeting some else just him being a loser. that was just wrong Gabriel just wrong. i know you heard say this several times already but i just really think you could have done better with spike and i really hope you do in future stories
Pretty much already been said, but again this fic couldn't have ended any better. Although some people are pretty skeptical of Spike's outcome. To those out there that are skeptical, look at it this way. There's plenty of fics on this site that cater to a good outcome for Spike, this one ended up being just an exception. It's Gabriel's story, plain and simple.
and they lived happily ever after
i was hoping for a plot twist in which Pinkie would enslave Twilight in a basement, i mean, the windowless ban with free candy in it but i guess in this way it was even more funny , at last Twilight got to try the carnal for herself
Aah!
Aww
Why you gotta tease me like that, man?
2682158
I do understand. But... I think you see the irony of your statement on a fanfiction site. As well, some things crave adulteration and fixing. Like alternate endings to Cupcakes or Rainbow Factory. I'm fine with that.
2682722
That's half the reason I did it. A subversion. I wanted to emphasize the windowless white free candy van aspect to make folks think Cupcakes and groping without consent. But it is actually as cordial as their relationship in the show.
2682722 except spike who just get the sh*t stick at the end
2683164
I suppose there are some fics that do. But it feels really dishonest to me. I might not like it but I just feel like there's really nothing I can do about it. I see fanfics as creating your own stories within an already established universe, not changing a story for your own benefit. Fanfics of those sort are typically garbage.
And for the record, I've never read Cupcakes or Rainbow Factory. I hate horror in general.
2687887
True, I suppose. I've never done it but I understand the impetus. I managed to avoid Cupcakes but I checked a MSTed version of Rainbow Factory. The only thing I ever "adulterated" or similar was all the works and ideas of Ayn Rand. With perhaps a bit of a pisstake towards ultra-objectivist dorkface Jay Naylor.
well this story has been a very confusing one for me Gabriel well i do like this story quite lot and it the sex scenes are great. the only real complaint is that well you know it already how spike was treated in this story. i mean sersiouly he doesn't get girl and the girl he loves pretty much forgets he exists. that really left a bad taste in my mouth. now i know you don't hate spike but the diamond dogs are jerks to him. sorry for ranting this but it just makes me so mad. but i cant just hate this entire story just because of spike's treatment. it is well done, and i hope to see more of it soon.
Finally bit the bullet and read it, and it was strange. Very, very strange. I feel nothing for or against it. Nice at parts but also slightly disturbing. I give it a 5 out of 10. Not great but not terrible.
2690716
Your concluding civility is quite encouraging. You seems to be a very decent, if perhaps overly passionate, fellow with a fixed idea about how Spike should always be treated. Just as a warning: not everyone treats Spike with respect. If you go off in a punching rage every time he is disrespected you will end up tired with bloody knuckles. Try to relax and accept it as the nature of thefanfiction beast.
There will be no more done on this universe, at least not in the forseeable future. But I am glad you enjoyed some parts.
2693655 yeah your right maybe i was too overreacting to it. it because spike is my favorite character on the show and to see him getting treatment like is would make me angry but i understand it your story and you don't hate spike or want to be rude to any one who does.
2693700
I'm actually fairly Spike-positive. It's just that most of my story ideas are fixed on places that don't really feature Spike, plus my preferred ship is Fluttershy/Rarity. I really should show off Spike more, but I don't want to just contrive reasons. So I need to really think about it.
2693782 that all right with me i do just hope spike to get some action in one of your future stories.
2693782
The problem is that in your main universe, you haven't simply shipped Rarity away from him, you've shipped off any potential mates he might have. Sweetie's entangled in an awkward relationship with Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom with Zecora (which I still cannot wrap my head around). If you're going to write a story where he gets with someone, you'll need to either use some little known character like Babs Seed or Twist, invent your own character, or one of the other established ones gets broken up (which is extremely unlikely, so that can be scratched). And then you have another issue in your little Hybridizing pamphlet that basically says that a dragon with anyone but a dragon is simply too much trouble biologically for the female. This pretty much crushes any hope of Spike getting together with anything beyond a dragon while having a relationship that is meaningful. You can either play it up as an important romantic point that love can persevere even through that large hurdle, get him with a dragon or else retcon it completely. The fact that dragons were singled out in this instance strikes me as odd anyway.
Part of that is one reason why Spike's fate bothered me somewhat in this fic. He's a bit lonely in your main universe and this story seemed to pile on a bit. The Diamond Dogs didn't receive their comeuppance within the narrative, but I suppose that's not to say it didn't happen away from the printed text, lost in the timeskip. Spike's end is pathetic and depressing. Despite what he might say, he is not happy with his arrangement. I can only imagine Rarity's reaction to it being a mixture of pity for how low he's sunk to utter disgust at the thought of it.
2694140
True in a way but not quite. Spike isn't interested in the ones you mentioned. It's clear from the 'Rarity' scenario that he likes mature mares. Owlowicious even advises Peewee of this. And the birthing thing is something he recognized. He would be fine with adoption. The reason dragons get singled out, as you say, is they are very singular. Many times larger than ponies, far longer-lived and with offspring about as large as a pony. It's dangerous if not always fatal to the mother, even leaving aside the question of how the spem will her in her. I suppose if you're really, really fixated on this point I could sent him through what Big Mac went through. The power of the Granter could make it happen.
But about his fate... this may be more values dissonance. I have to think cuckolds know what they're doing, I've conversed with a lot of them. Sure, it makes no sense to you or I that they are satisfied, just like I don't know how a threesome relationship works or how a BDSM relationship works. But I am told it does and absent empirical data to the contrary I must conclude it does.
2696464
Cadmus sowed dragon's teeth and reaped a crop of destruction. These guys are sowing STDs in their partners. So I was going for the blunt statement.
2693782 i know you said your spike-postitve but i doubt others would think that if they read this story
2708258
If anyone read this expecting to learn about my main universe I think they're severely misunderstanding both.
There are way more lesbians and fewer porn stars in the main universe.
2720495
Little attention? Perhaps it's just because my normal stories get relatively scant attention save for loyal readers (I don't quite attract new folk like this thing) but this got enought attention for my purposes. It made the feature box and has a lot of comments and upthumbs. I'm very glad you like it.
2724310
He wrote a sex scene between a djinn (male) and a cab driver (also male). It didn't even sink in to me how graphic it was until one of them was blowing the other or something, been a while since I read that book. I was like halfway through before it occurred to me that this was pretty damn strange, and a different kind of strange than The Sandman or Coraline. Whenever I don't realize I'm watching something really weird until I'm halfway through it, it reminds me of reading that book.
I like Pinkie Pie as the lawyer.
2732316
You know that was one of my favorite parts as well. I love how zany and free she is. Benign (or at least restrained) Discord as the judge is funny and fun to write.
Honestly, just for this story, fuck Spike. The little beta cuck asshole deserves being put in his place and being a forever alone little bitch who's dick will never get wet from real pussy. Fuck all you haters.
*Reads final final epilogue*
Hmmm, at least he has some closure.
the only thing i did not lik about the story is you never explained why big mac and cherrilee broke up. is big mac a voyeur?
8644814
Big Mac and Cheerilee didn't really love each other, their relationship was set up by the Apple family.
Turnabout Porn, Part One