My Little Octavia

by rainbowdash_25

chapter 6

~Luna’s POV~

Still recovering from her teleportation spell, Luna set’s out to find Michael and the rest of the group. As she is walking, she notice’s how different the two worlds are from each other. What she finds most remarkable is that the weather on earth is controlled by no pony, but on its own. One more thing she found fascinating is the night sky, how different it looks to the one she created back in Equestria. Luna thought to herself, “I need to stop looking at the sky and start looking for Michael.” She starts on her search once again. Little did she know that she wasn’t alone in her neck of the woods.

~Michael’s POV~

When we all went into the tent to get some sleep, I just couldn’t shut myself down; I had way too much on my mind. How did those people find my dad and why did they have him come after us? Did they think that I would trust him, and come along nicely? Even though I hate his guts, I just hope he doesn’t get into too much trouble. After about an hour of just laying there, Michael finally fell asleep.

~In another part of the woods~

“Why have you not brought back them back too us, like we told you!!” The leader of The Bandits continued on yelling at Michael’s father and his friend. “We told specifically to capture them and bring them to us, isn’t that right boys? All you could hear was a bunch of “Yes sir” and “You did tell them that boss.” The leader turned back towards Michael’s father and said, “Do you think you deserve another chance, or do I need to go and do it myself?” Robert, Michael’s father, took a step forward and said, “Please we can do this, just give us that second chance.” The leader of the bandits said, “Alright I’m a man of my word, you get another shot at this, but if you fail, you won’t survive to see another day. Do you understand me?” Robert and his friend said, “Yes sir.” One of the members of the group came up to the leader and said, “Sir, one of our patrols has spotted a bright flash of light, about 30 minutes walk from here. Do you want me send out a group of men to go check it out?” The leader thought for second and then said, “Yes, head out and check it out and if you find anyone, bring them back here.” The guy then ran towards a group of men and set out to find out what it was they saw. The leader thought to himself, “About time you showed up Luna and I can’t wait till we meet again.” He chuckled and told Robert and his friend to get lost and he walked back to his tent.

~Luna’s POV~

Luna, after finally recovering from her big use of magic, decided on using a tracking spell to try and find Michael. Her hand started glowing and then, just like a hologram, a radar appeared above her hand. It showed an image of the forest around her and red dots telling her where Michael was at. As she was looking more closely at it, it showed more dots coming closer to her location. Luna quickly started running, whoever it was, she had to get out of here. Luna started undoing the jacket that she had on and spread her wings out. Just as she was about to take flight, someone grabbed her leg and pulled her back to the ground. Someone else grabbed her wings and tied them down and also tied her hands together. “What is it you people want and how did you know where I was at?” Luna asked them harshly. “It’s not what we want, it’s what our boss wants and we think you might know who he is.” The person that said this started laughing and everyone else around them also laughed. They started heading back towards their camp site, with Luna tied up.

When they got back to their camp, their leader spotted them and grinned when he saw Luna. “I’m surprised you didn’t put up much of a fight your Majesty.” He sarcastically bowed and laughed, “I’m guessing you didn’t want to fight, because your curiosity got the best of you and you wanted to know more about who we are. That was your biggest mistake, because you aren’t going to find any answers here. We work for someone with bigger plans, for both worlds, Earth and Equestria.” After saying all of this he raised his hand and cast a magical barrier around Luna. Luna tried countering It, but was to late, the barrier already surrounded her and it made it to where she couldn’t use magic. Luna looked over to where the group’s leader was and said, “You won’t get away with this Leon!”

~Anthony's POV~

The next morning, "I want to leave the forest! It's creepy!" Vinyl whined, mouth full with toasty marshmallows. "She's right. Can we leave now?" Octavia asked. "Sure thing, guys." I replied. "Yay!" They both shouted.

Our band of intelligence was siting down near the fire, enjoying weenies and marshmallows, while the ponies enjoyed another dandelion sandwich with marshmallows, as well. After the incident last night, we decided to leave camp after we rested. No one wanted to re-live it and nopony wanted to stay near the ominous forest, so it was chosen to leave the woods itself and find another path.

"Did you get everything we need from the camper?" I asked Michael. "Yeah, there in the sleeping bags. Be careful, though. You know the bags can easily rip and the stuff inside is delicate," Michael said. "Right. Yo, everybody-" I was cut off. "EveryPONY." Octavia corrected.

Michael laughed. "So...yeah everypony," I then mumbled something inaudible, "hurry up and eat your food. We should leave ASAP for better chance of 'early bird gets the worm.'" Surprisingly, we all wolfed down our meal and started to heave the sleeping bags over us and we carried (or in the ponies case, hauled) the stuff around the forest.

*Thud*

Michael turned around in a flash. Vinyl started laughing hysterically. Octavia had face planted in some mud, sleeping bag on top. "Are you alright?" Michael asked and put down his load to help Octavia. "Yes, I'm fine. But I guess I'm not much of a work pony. And vinyl, this isn't funny!" She laughed harder. Even her laughter made me chuckle a bit. Octavia looked unhappy and unpleased. I soon recognized the emotion and stopped gawking. "Sorry, Octavia, I didn't realize how embarrassing this was to you. We're sorry, right Vinyl?" She continued to chortle. I smote her by the hind leg. "Ye-yeah, i-I'm sorry, Tav-i!" Vinyl apologized, trying to hold down her laughter. We continued around the forest for about 2 hours.

"Are we there yet?" Vinyl questioned. "Now, don't go starting that." I replied.

Another hour passed and finally we saw a road about 700 feet away. We quickly sprinted to it with our remaining energy. When we reached it, it wasn't a road. It was a highway. "What's a highway doing around here?" I asked, not meaning to have an answer. "I don't know, why were ya asking me?" Michael replied. I stood silenced. He responded to my silence after a while. "Uh, you think we should scavenge the highway banks for anything useful?" I nodded. "I don't want to mess up my complexion anymore than I already have." Octavia confessed. Michael didn't want to fight with her, I could tell. So I tried to persuade her. "Hey, come on Tavi! Michael will teach you more... Skills in cello-playing. Right Michael?" I winked at him. "D-uh, yeah, I'll help you play the cello more." Immediately Octavia shot up with a grin smeared across her face.
"Really!?"
"Yes!"
"Yay!"

Soon after that we commenced our search for supplies. After 7 minutes of frantic search, Vinyl said she found something. So I went over to see what it was. "It looks like some kind of token." She said to me. "Hold on. Give it to me." I asked. Once I received it, i couldn't believe my eyes. What she found was two BITS. No. Freakin'. Way. "Woah!" I screeched. "Wait, what?" Michael asked. "Can you believe it? Vinyl found two bits!" I responded.
"No way!"
"I know right! Nice job vinyl."
She smiled.
"Hey... Aren't bits the usual currency in Equestria?" He yet again asked.
"Duh!" I replied.
"Where the hell did that come from?"
"I don't know."
"You'd better keep that safe," I said, "Don't know what might happen to it."
He replied with a nod and put the bits in his pocket.

I spotted an old tire on the highway a short way from me. I quickly checked the highway for any incoming vehicles. As soon as that was done, I ran up to the tire and snatched it up, then brought it back. "Yo, look what I found. An old tire." "Why would we need that?" Michael asked, looking back at the ponies to (I guess) make sure they're okay. "You never know. We might need this. It still got some air in it." I set the tire down beside the sleeping bags and went back to searching.
*Crunch*
The dirt below my feet suddenly caved in a pit.
I screamed.
"Ahh!"
I landed on my right foot, but that wasn't all.

When i landed, my foot made a snapping sound. I had broke my ankle I think. The pain was unbearable. It felt as if someone took a sledge hammer and brought it down on my ankle with such force, it could break a brick. I don't know why it hurt so much. Another cry escaped me after a while, one of agony. "Ahh, my damn foot!" I looked up. Foot and hoof steps were heard nearing me. "What happened!?" Vinyl gasped. "The ground caved in! I don't see a way out." I took a look around the pit. Nothing. Nothing but utter darkness. "I also managed to...break my foot." "What? How?" Michael said. "I don't know. We have to get me out." "This is very dreadful," Octavia said, "We have to help him!" "Please get Anthony out!" Vinyl pleaded to Michael. He stood there, then seemed to have thought of an idea. "Wait here." He said and walked out of my sight. "Hurry!" I yelped.

I started to feel drowsy. Oh no. "I...I think I'm gonna-" and then everything went black. *Thud* "Anthony!" Mom called out. "Just six more minutes, mom!" I replied. Wait a second. "Mom? Is that you?" "Dude, it's Michael!" Suddenly I stood right up. Pain shot through my right foot.
"Oh, yeah. Right."
"Yo, you alright?"
"If you forget my injury, then yeah I'm fine."
"I got a truck to pull over by the highway. It was carrying rope and twine. You're getting out, bro!"

Relief overwhelmed me. "How long was I blacked out?" I asked.
"Four days!"
"What?!"
"I know, right?"

Soon some rope was brought down and I grabbed onto it. "One, two, three, pull!" I could hear a man I could tell much older than me or Michael. They, including the man, pulled me out of the pit. As soon as I was out, I flopped onto the ground. "Thank you!" I told the man. "Yer' welcome. Name's Eddie. Mighty well to meet you." He said and stuck out his arm. I shook it.
"Nice to meet you too."
"Sure hope ah meet ya guys soon. Ya folks are real fine."
"Me too. Thanks for helping out, Eddie."
Michael took out his wallet.
"So how much will it be? A twenty?"
"Oh no, don't worry, I'm jus' helpin' out a little, you know?"
"You sure?"
"Of course! Ah'd better get back to ma shift. Got a lotta stuff to haul, ya know?"
"Don't worry we understand," We both said.

And without another word he got in his semi-truck and drove away. Michael called to the ponies. "I made them hide behind the bushes where they couldn't be seen."
"That's smart."
"Come on out, it's safe!"
Octavia, and only her, stepped out the bushes.
"Where's vinyl?" I asked her.
"I don't know! All I heard was some grass shaking and hoofsteps. I turned around but nopony was there!"
"What now!?" Michael said.

~Back at The Bandits camp~

A scout group had just got back to check in and "Leon" their leader is in for a surprise. "Hey Boss check out what we got, we think your gona like it," A scout member said. The scout pulled Vinyl out from behind him. She had a bag over her head and was freaking out.
"Where am I!!
Michael!
Anthony!
Anyone!!

Leon smiled and thought, "This is perfect, one down and three to go." He walked towards the scout group and Vinyl and said, "Where are the others didn't you see them?" "She's the only one we saw Boss," The scout cringed expecting a blow to the head, but it never came. "If you found this one, they are bound to be out looking for her, now get back out there and look," Leon shouted. They soon left and Leon walked towards Vinyl and said, "Your mine now Vinyl and I'll be soon getting my revenge on you and your little friend Octavia." Vinyl shook in fear and was tossed into the magic prison with Princess Luna.
"Here's a little friend for you Luna enjoy."
"I'm sorry I failed you Luna," Vinyl said bowing.
"I'm not mad Vinyl, for I too have been captured. Lets just hope the others will be safe."

~Michael's POV~

Michael walked over to Anthony who was on the tire crying, "I failed.. I failed in protecting Vinyl." Michael knelt down and put his hand on Anthony's shoulder, "Everything will be alright. Im sure that Vinyl will be alright, she is a tough one."

After consoling Anthony, they all got up and started walking down the highway. Anthony was having a little trouble with his foot being broke, Michael had to make some temporary crutches, made out of sturdy branches and the twine.

Along the way, they found a abandoned motorcycle. Seeing it was a little damaged, they just had to deal with it. Michael took the lead and drove it, with Anthony behind him and Octavia on his lap. They pulled out onto the highway and drove down a little ways.

After about an hour on the road, they pulled off onto a dirt road and went down, about three miles. They soon came upon a village of some kind. "I thought there weren't anymore villages in the U.S.?" Anthony said. Michael shook his head and laughed, "They don't call them villages anymore, but they are considered unincorporated."
"Oh."
They all checked into a motel and decided to stay there for awhile.

Author's Note:

So here is the 6th chapter I hope you all like it and I'm sorry for the wait. I've been caught up with school and having to prepare for finals since its the end of the school year. My co-writer Meat Biscuit aka Demise, wrote Anthony's POV for me again and I have to say that he does an amazing job with it. I wouldn't be able to do much without his help now, so thanks again Demise.
P.S. If you spot any gramar problems let me know and I'll fix them.
Rainbowdash_25 out!!

Comments

[Rainbow Song]

a bit plain but still fine

[rainbowdash_25]

2572626 thanks for liking it and ya i guess it was sorta plain lol but i tried and it wouldn't be near as good if it wasn't for my co-writer

[DoctorSerious]

Alright, so chapter 6 is out. And after reading it, I can honestly say you didn't improve after last time. You didn't get worse, but it's still just plain and boring. There is no meat to your story, no character, no real excitement. Well, except for maybe one thing.

So what made me say that? First, the villians aren't all that threatening. They just seem like very basic bad guys, who are way over their heads.
Second, things still sort of happen. They don't seem to have any real reason for making it happen, like Anthony breaking his foot. What does this mean for him and the group? Will they get slowed down? We don't know, it happens and 'BAM!', that's it.
And there still isn't any character development going on, or atleast, not really anything that speaks real character development. Anthony crying over not being able to protect Vinyl is a step forward, but isn't explored enough. Vinyl is his favourite character, they made music together. I hope you write more emotion in the next chapter about this, because this can be a good inside on Anthony's character. And Michael still seems too bland to pay any attention to, sorry.
And still some wish-fullfilment logic (seriously, how do they keep finding all that stuff?) and some grammar mistakes, like misspelled words and you switched from first person to third person once.

But I did say that something interesting happened, which is the capture of Vinyl. The capture of Luna I didn't count, seeing as it seemed way too easy. Really, she didn't fight back? That's pretty dumb, Luna. But with the capture of Vinyl, I still question the fact why they didn't capture the rest of the group. It seems pretty self-explanatory to look around for the rest. Once again, kind of bad bad guys.

So in the end, you haven't really changed what made your story bad to begin with. The story is still sort of going nowhere, the characters are bland, too much is going the way of the main characters (except Vinyl's capture, not Luna's) and it still isn't all that exciting. Perhaps you should make the chapters longer from now on, or slow down some of the scenes.

I wish you luck in the future.

[rainbowdash_25]

2576402 Thanks again for the insight and i will keep trying to improve it.

[FlutterFan93]

*Looks at title*
*Sees descrpition*

This is not based off of my little dashie so don't get the wrong idea.

Suuuuuuuuuure it isn't

[rainbowdash_25]

2644242 Im sorry for that im kinda new at this lol

[rainbowdash_25]

2648162 Did you read the story?? Jw

[FlutterFan93]

2671512 I tried, but it's written horribly

[rainbowdash_25]

2671550 sorry its my first time

[ZerOAimi]

how can they check in if their stuff got erased
other than that,great chapter
MORE!!!!!

[rainbowdash_25]

2804366 you actually like it? Not many people do But thanks for asking for more I kinda got writers block on this fic so Ill try my best to continue it

[Demise115]

2804366 co-writer here. Have u ever heard of False identity?

[ZerOAimi]

2807694 I never really thought of that......

[rainbowdash_25]

2804366 oh forgot to tell you, I guess they just paid cash no I.D. lol that's my guess. Didn't really think about it

[Flowtas]

When I read the short description my first thoughts were

they are racist

And

Being a brony was the best thing that ever happened to me

[sinewystatue382]

nice cant wait for more chapters to come out soon

[rainbowdash_25]

11181239
Oh wow someone came across this after so many years. I completely forgot about this till my wife asked if I ever written fan fiction. Decided to login and show her. Thanks for commenting. I may come back and rewrite all this for the better as I was in my freshman year of high school when i was attempting to write fan fiction.