• Member Since 7th Jan, 2013
  • offline last seen September 28th

Distaff Pope

An experienced writer of limited skill and dangerous enthusiasm.


This story is a sequel to The Royal Ponyville Orchestra

I really just... Sure, I thought having a bachelorette party would be nice. Certainly, after the year I had, I wouldn't say no to a relaxing weekend in Canterlot with my friends, but instead, I get Bon-Bon confessing that she's a secret agent, and oh yes, she wants me to do a little light espionage for her. There are roughly a hundred things wrong with that statement, but by far, the worst one is that I, Octavia Melody, bastion of rationality, agreed to help her.

Note: The first three chapters are the story. The last two chapters are the originally published drafts that I'm keeping around in case someone actually preferred that version of events and so I have a monument to the fact that I can make some really stupid writing decisions sometimes.

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 33 )

Mind control and altercation is probably one of the most terrifying things that I could think of, the force against ones will and controlling them to destroy everything they have ever done or accomplished. Just damn.

By the time I had finished my story, both of us had cried, run out of tears, and cried some more, something I had previously thought impossible.

Those are the worst kinds of crying.

Damn, I would probably kill myself if even half of the things Tavi has been through happened to me.
Anyway I am glad to read the rest of the story! :rainbowkiss:
Also you should totally make references to this in the Princess Lunas Academy somehow! :pinkiehappy:

I smiled reassuringly at her. “Bon-Bon, you’ve planned this out so well, I don’t think anything could go wrong.”

*Smashes forehead against keyboard*
I thought RPO taught you never to say that Octy!

:yay: I liked it!!
It was dark but for some reason Nightmare Night and Anthro Con seemed darker to me.
Maybe because I wasn't expecting it in RPO or maybe because I've been preparing myself for this fic for a while, I don't know!
What I DO know is I enjoyed this immensely!!! Thank you for writing it, I kinda need more variety in my reading so this was a good break from all the smut and cuddles.

4544742 Things have just been going well for her for so long she kind of thought her streak of terrible mind numbingly bad luck was over. Doubly so since she was outside of Ponyville when she said it.

4545087 It is interesting that you found Anthro-Con and NN to be darker than this. I think both of the theories you offered as to why are valid explanations. Anyways, glad you enjoyed it. Hope to see you in the next chapter of my Sweetie Fic (Still being written).

Damn, that was grim. I enjoyed it a lot, though.

4582876 Thanks, glad you did. A story that's more in line with the original tone of the RPO SHOULD be coming out later this week.

More words surfaced in the vast emptiness. Slowly but surely, I scooped them up and managed to cobble together a functional sentence. “Humans. Real. What?” A mostly functional sentence.

“I can’t drink,” I said. “Not without having a particularly negative reaction to my medications.”

I feel like something is missing there. Did you import it from gdocs? It tends to eat some stuff.

it might
certainly never read. Still, it was important to play the part, I suppose. “I’m not that talented.”

Seems something got eaten again.

“No,” I said, dropping to the ground and grovelling before him. “You know I wouldn’t, I just love you so much and I want you and-”
He laughed his calm, easy, melodious laugh. “It’s alright, pet, get to your hooves.”

“I need...” he said, slowly trailing off. “I need you to write a letter to that former fiancée of yours. What was his name?”

Here as well, unless it's just a double space between the lines.

one over by my charm

"I think you mean "won over by my charm"

Alright I'm sorry for not taking your advice. All in all it wasn't that bad. It wasn't great, but it also was not bad. The writing was fine for the most part, but I just cant say I liked it. Okay... Tavi killing the guy just turned me off entirely, I kept reading under the hopes that Celestia would give her the news that he had actually survived, but... yeah. I don't like it when a character I love has to deal with something like that. I suppose explanations are in order.

I have written stories where Fluttershy has killed, but I did it because in that universe, Fluttershy is a killer. However I wrote a stupidly over the top of cuteness Flutterdash fic where I would never make her kill anyone or anything. Then in the middle ground I have read a story where Fluttershy has been forced into the responsibility of putting down sick or injured pets that have no chance for recovery. I work under the idea that these are three entirely different characters and thus have three entirely different personalities and sets of morals. This particular Octavia... it just didn't feel right to see her kill a pony. I suppose that spoiler would have been enough to keep me from reading this one, but, meh, I regret nothing. I'll see you at the next chapter.

5385969 Like I said. I despise this story. I really do. Consider it basically non-canon. A mistake made on my part that will be fixed one day. It's not true to the Orchestra verse and it's my least favorite story. You know what, this story has been an albatross around my neck long enough. It's time for me to fix it.

5385988 Well that is exciting, not the albatross thing(seriously you shoot one bird and the whole ship goes down) but the editing part. I wish you the best of luck and I think I'll add this to tracking just so I can keep an eye on it for when it does get its mighty re-release.

You can take away a pony’s memories and give them a pleasant lie in return.

Memories of Shadow confirmed in the same universe! :pinkiegasp:

Also, the term 'orgy' is outdated, they're called genital jamberines now. :twistnerd:

5565130 If you really want to get crazy, just imagine that the original version is the atrocious reality Celestia wiped away. However, I'll leave all that to the domain of fan theories. Also, to be fair, Celestia does another mind magic spell in Foal Fever, so... the hints have always been there, but they will just stay as hints, I think.

The frank approves.

Yeah, I like this one better. I read the first version and I was rather annoyed. It made sense what happened to her because of alcohol and meds but I didn't like how it turned.

This feels a bit closer to what the other stories are like. I'll just pretend the others didn't exist. :pinkiesmile:

I actually like the original...

6676183 I'm not saying the original was bad, and as a standalone story, I wouldn't have changed a thing, but it's tone was so completely odds with the rest of the Orchestra-verse that I became profoundly disappointed with it. I leave it up for fans of the original and to remind myself not to let my interests take the driver seat.

My guess, A. He won't take the mint. B. It wont knock him out, or C. Some shit happens and ruins it.

This isnt really dark, its like those comedic spy movies. Also, with a name like turn coat how does one not suspect traitor?

6803087 The Dark tag is a holdover from the original draft, I think.

Good storie

And credit for having the guts to keep both chapter 'round. Ill give them a read.

:rainbowderp: shit... Woah, i will coment after the next chapter

Hm. That has a supprisingly moral ending, i was expecting Celestia to offer a memory wipe or something that would cause controversy in the comments.
It has a very light ending though, and as for a guy that reads Horus Heresy Novels, this wasnt dark. But i can see why you despise it with what you have further down the line.

6803659 I don't completely despise it, it just felt really out of line with the rest of the Orchestra-verse, especially Octavia's side of it. Okay as a standalone, but it kind of cast a pallor on Goal Fever and Weirdly Wed.

6803825 i didn't say "completely". And yeah, pretty much

GOOOOOOAAAAAAAL!!!!!! (Funny the first typo of your's i point out is in a comment)

I skimmed the first of those 2 chapters, think I'll just stick with this version. It's an okay story but didn't really hook me. Octavia's Bachelorette party had such great potential I just felt that this story didn't do it justice. I think the pacing was just a little to fast for my liking and lacked depth in certain areas, also a Hangover style Octavia Bachelorette party where Octavia drank despite her meds would have been hilarious.

Fuck, it really would have. And now in 2019, the Hangover is old enough it's not played out anymore.

Lmao, I'm worried to read the review because of what a mess this story was

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