“You wanted to see me Princess? Am I in trouble?” Twilight asked. She limped through the door into a small office, after being asked to report to her. It was in a private wing, which she got lost several times just to find. Struggling to maintain her collectiveness, Twilight tripped twice before reaching her seat.
“Yes Twilight, you are in trouble.” Celestia calmly answered. “Consider yourself expelled from this school. I no longer want to see you anywhere near the school’s premises.”
“W-w-what?” Twilight flailed out of her chair and onto ground. Her heart raced around the prospect, hyperventilation soon following afterwards. As Twilight gasped for more air, Celestia let out a soft giggle from behind her desk.
“Calm down, Twilight. Twas just a jest. Unless you do want me to expel you?”
“Oh, n-no thanks, Princess. I think I’d prefer to stay a student.” Twilight gasped. She got herself back up on the seat and looked Celestia in the eyes.
“I’m glad to hear that Twilight. Do you know why you’re here?”
“N-no, Princess. Did I do something wrong?”
“You mean besides trying to kill Silver?” Celestia asked back. Twilight looked away, turning towards a wall and kept quiet. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of Twilight, well besides failing.” Twilight returned to staring at the playful alicorn, finding Celestia to be grinning with amusement.
“Excuse me, Princess? Were you expecting me to try to kill Silver?”
“No, I expected you to fail and try again.” While Twilight stared at her with a confused look, Celestia ignited her horn in gold, whisking out a musty folder. She then levitated it to Twilight, undoing the seals as the auras switched from hers to Twilight’s.
Opening the front cover, Twilight read the name inside. “Silver Swirl, born on the eve of the last Lunar year. Parents: unknown. Place of birth: unknown. Status quo: Princess. Magic: alicorn equivalent. Race: unicorn.” Twilight kept reading until most of the info was just common knowledge. “I don’t understand Princess. Why did you give me Silver’s file?”
“Read the analysis on her genetic structure.” Celestia gestured.
Twilight kept her skeptical look up, but didn’t question the all knowing promethean. “DNA results returned contain subject’s blood shows...” Trailing off, Twilight started to pale as she saw what it said next.
“Subject shows clear signs of having... pure alicorn genes, as well as matching chromosomes, but seems to have a recessive gene that suppress the formation of wings. However, magic capabilities do not show any hinderage from these recessive genes.”
Beginning to shake, Twilight closed the folder and set it back onto the desk. “Is Silver your daughter?” Looking Celestia directly in the eyes, Twilight began sweating as the princess let out a giggle.
“I’m surprised in you, Twilight. What gave you the idea that she was my daughter?”
“Well... who’s else could she? You’re the only alicorn alive, right? I mean...” Twilight began brightening on the cheeks as she turned away, “you’re not exactly a virgin goddess.”
While Twilight remained antsy, Celestia giggled at the deduction. “No I am not. But I can tell you with certainty that Silver is not my daughter. The report however, is true though.”
“Why... why are you telling me this? You said Silver’s file was... classified.” Twilight’s eyes then bulged as she realized the outcome of reading restricted information. “Oh, wow, will you look at the time? I think my sister’s calling me. Goodbye Princess, nice meeting ya.” Rushing to the door, she found it locked with magic, delaying her escape.
“Twilight,” called Celestia, rising from her seat. She walked to the desperate filly and watched as Twilight begun using her chompers to forcefully open the door. Using a wing, she swept the filly away from the door, and back into the seat. “You don’t fear death, Twilight. So what do you have to worry about me?”
“Hehehe...” laughed Twilight nervously, “oh just never being able to see my family again is all.”
“Do you really see me as someone who would do that, Twilight?” Celestia lost her cheerful tone and asked in a more serious manner. In her efforts to try to calm her, Celestia only made things worse as Twilight began hyperventilating again.
“Pardon-me-Princess-but-I’m-quite-sure-there-were-two-princesses-that-ruled-Equestria. Please-don’t-banish-me!” Twilight flinched and closed her eyes, waving her hooves around to whack the alicorn away.
“You’re right, there were two Princess.” Celestia turned her back, facing the wall and unlocking the door with her magic. “But you have yet to give me a reason to banish you. You may return to your class Twilight, our talk is over.”
“O-okay, Princess. It was nice to meet you in person.” Calming down, Twilight limped to the door and magicked it open.
“Twilight,” called Celestia, stopping the filly at the door. “Do keep this between us. It wasn’t I that made her file classified. There are secrets worth dying for, and you now know one of them. Good luck in your studies, and staying alive.”
Twilight didn’t bother staying in the office to hear Celestia’s warning, dashing out and halfway through a corridor before she even stopped to catch her breath. Note to self: never ask Silver for a favour.
|~|~|~|~|~|
“Please excuse my skepticism here, Trixie, but now I just know you’re making things up. If you weren’t even there to witness Twilight and Princess Celestia talk with each other, how do you know about it? If the Princess didn’t want Twilight telling anyone about it, how you possibly know about it? I’m sorry but you’re starting to lose me here.”
“Well...”
“And all three of you being so casual about killing each other? It doesn’t matter if you can magically heal your organs, I’m pretty sure at least one of you would be traumatized by it. And all this conspiracy with the Princess and this mysterious relative of her? I hope you can see why I’m skeptical.”
“I might have made up a few things here and there... But only not to bore you!”
“Believe me darling, I’m pretty sure I’d be more interested in hearing about your real life than some made up story just for entertainment. Now if you don’t mind? Could you give the real version? I know your sister is talented, you speak highly of her already, but I’m quite certain only alicorns have the ability to come back life.”
“Do you honestly want to hear a boring version of it? I mean, a battle to the death? Are you sure?”
“The truth, if you don’t mind. I really won’t think less of you. Sure life can be boring when you first think about it, but after you look back on it, you tend to laugh at how silly it was. What really happened?”
“Alright there really wasn’t a battle to the death...”
“Go on,” Rarity gestured with a hoof.
“We went to the library instead...”
|~|~|~|~|~|
“How’s your latte Trixie?” Silver asked.
“Great! Thanks Silver. What did you get?”
“Oh, just some hot chocolate.” She answered. She beamed at the filly and turned to Twilight cautiously. “Twilight, are you sure you can handle an espresso? I don’t think you’re old enough to be anywhere near that stuff.”
“I’ll be fine,” she reassured, waving a hoof to ward away Silver’s worries. “Besides, I could use something this strong on long study nights. What’s the worst that could happen?”
“Just be careful Twilight, it’s hot.” Silver answered. She sipped from her cup, levitating a book from her saddle bags onto the table. Inside she had a page marked with a silk ribbon, and a picture of what looked like her family.
“Who’s in the picture?” Trixie asked. She got a hoof to the rib from Twilight, and a stare saying it’s not their business. Looking closer, the photo was brown with age, cracking at the edges and the colour a monotone.
“Oh just me and my friends.” Silver grinned. She stared blankly at it, eventually showing the sisters the photo. They saw Silver pose with her friends, all of them laughing and giggling with one another.
“What were their names?” Twilight asked, examining the photo with care.
“The top right was Morning Glory. She always thought of ways to help her friends even when she was overworked herself.” Said Silver, pointing to a pinkish pony. “Bottom left was Ivy. If you ever committed a fashion crime, she was always the first to know.” Silver moved her hoof to the other side, pointing to a violet pony. “Crystal was always the brainy one. She’d look at the stars most of the time and had a knack for seeing the future.”
She moved her hoof diagonally, to another pink pony. “She was Twinkle Star. Twinkle had the power to grant any wish, but never her own.” Her hoof then moved to the last pony besides herself. “That’s Trixiebelle. She’d always try to get us to laugh, especially on a rainy day. And there’s me,” said Silver, pointing to the white pony in the center.
“Hey Silver?” asked Trixie. “What’s your special talent? Your cutie mark doesn’t really say much about it.” She got another elbow from Twilight, which Trixie knew was starting to bruise.
“Well, if you were wondering, it was being a guardian. I protected my friends with my magic and what not, and my mana shields always took the shape of swirls, hence the silver swirls.”
“Ahh, I wish my cutie mark was just as interesting! All I can do is illusion magic.” Whined Trixie.
“Everypony has a special talent that only they can do, Trixie. Not many ponies can do illusion magic that you probably can do in your sleep.” Said Silver, getting the picture back and putting into her book.
“Yea, because illusion magic is gonna get me far in life. Just imagine how many ponies I could entertain with a magic show.” Trixie said, rolling her eyes.
“Hey at least you know what your cutie mark means. I still don’t know what mine's supposed to be or what it does for that matter. Just a huge star surrounded by more stars,” said Twilight, pointing to it.
“Yea, because the the unknown is better than trickery. I totally see that being true, Twilight,” Trixie scoffed.
“Come on you two,” interrupted Silver. “Class is about is start. We’d better get going before we get detention for being late. Thanks again for the donuts Trixie.”
|~|~|~|~|~|
“Now that sounds much better, darling.” Rarity smiled.
“Sure,” said Trixie. “If you want a totally boring version.”
“I don’t mind it, Trixie. Honestly, I’d rather be bored out of mind and hear a truthful part of your lives than some pizazz version with nothing but explosions every five minutes.”
“If you say so,” Trixie scoffed, rolling her eyes.
“Oh, I know so. Besides, just because you don’t think it’s interesting doesn’t mean it’s not interesting for someone else. Sometimes it’s the quiet and easy life that’s most would prefer listening to. Now this Silver, she sounds rather intriguing, is she not?”
“Now that part however, I didn’t lie about.” Said Trixie, her eyes sparkling with a sense of mystery.
“What?”
“Silver really was immortal, almost as old as Princess Celestia if not more.”
“How’s that even possible? I thought only alicorns were immortal.” Rarity asked, a skeptical eyebrow raised.
“Now that’s a million bit question.” Grinned Trixie. She opened her saddlebags and magicked out a book with a golden unicorn on the covers. “Have you ever of the Elements of Harmony?”
“I think I’ve heard of it...” said Rarity thinking through her memory. “It certainly sounds familiar though.”
“Well, isn’t it strange how we’ve all heard about it, but don’t exactly know what it is? Just like one of those déjà vu moment? After doing some research on them, I found something rather interesting about the Elements and Silver.”
“Now, how do I know this is true?”
“Truthfully, it’s mostly rumors and speculations, with a bit of guessing...” Trixie said, mumbling as her last words.
“So it’s not true? That it’s just possibly possible?” Rarity asked, hearing Trixie’s mumbled words.
“Ehh, right now it’s leaning towards legends.” Answered Trixie, flipping through the pages. “Two sisters blah blah blah... Night and day blah blah blah... more mumbo jumbo about harmony... Banished to the moon yada yada yada...” Flipping through more pages, she finally found it.
“Here it is, Elements of Harmony. Greatest source of magic known to Equestria, but lost through time. Some speculate they lock themselves away, only revealing their true nature to those that have proven themselves worthy of their power.” Trixie flipped again to a picture of six glowing gems, each of them a different color.
“And how does this relate to Silver again?” Rarity asked, glancing over the picture with her glasses.
“Well, this is just a speculation right now, but I think she’s a bearer of the Elements.” Trixie whispers.
“Aheh...” Rarity said. “Remind me again how this makes her immortal?”
“Because of her cutie mark of course!” Trixie said, excitement in her eyes.
“You’ve lost me, and that is quite hard to do.”
“Her special talent was being a guardian right? Well, you put two and two together and you get this! Silver was granted immortality as the Elements saw her fit to protect them, but this isn’t alicorn type immortality. No, this is you can’t kill me kind of immortality.”
More like putting sweaters and ties together. “And you figured this all out how?” Rarity interrupted.
“With science of course! And a really big hydra.”
“W-what?”
“Anyways...” coughed Trixie. “Back to the story.”
oh god...
2144118
It's like Ghost Gusters all over again!
Personally I think it just shows how much you need a editor. Some of the events and scene transitions still seem disjointed.
Everything is better with Science.
Now... I see what you did there... you were writing the entire last chapter with the perspective of Trixie trying to liven up the story...
Without some sort of clue, readers don't have much to go on as to why the story jumped the rail so hard. Seeing this though, it was funny, if still somewhat stupid. Good to see the story is back on the rails, even if now somewhat less sensationalized. Wonder how Trixie's statements about the EoH work if/when Trixie/Twilight and the rest of the Mane 6 get back together to go confront NMM.
well ok you got one over on us.,..you sly cunning...thing you ... i guess i owe you an apology....later
At least you have a plushie.
Do keep this between. It wasn’t I that made her file classified.
I still don’t know what mines is supposed to be
I think I’ve hear of it
1. Do keep this between us.
2. Mine.
3. Heard.
Now then... let's see what the author's note has to sa-
TELL ME WHERE YOU GOT ONE NAO
Thank god, I was afraid you were really going to pull this through.
A while after reading last chapter I was like "Wait a second Trixie is telling the story, so she could be making this up. Well let's hope I'm right."
I was kinda worried there was no mention of it in the beginning of this chapter, but it resolved shortly after.
Congrats, you trolled people taking time out of their day to read and review your story.
My butt is hurt and it's mostly due to your smarmy authors note.
So Twilight DIDN'T epicly not-die?
Also, is it 'fun' or, "FUN"?
Well, sorry about my comment last chapter. I never should have doubted a writer as great as yourself.
Not like the trolling..........
I'm glad to see the story didn't jump the shark. I like this story, and the premise behind it too much to unfavorite it. I'm just glad to see you haven't taken leave of your senses. Though, I would advise against doing things like that. That's a good way to lose readers.
Uh, come again?
I... I thought you were going to go for a simple "alternate universe" story with this, where apart from Twilight's family dying everything is the same...
Now it's some kinda big magic-battle-destruction-revival-boom thingie...
What happened to that cute?
I'm halfway in the "Classmates" chapter now, and I don't think I can go on reading
4chan meme go!
Or was that unintentional?
Sir, first i have to say i love you story and it has a wonderful plot.
It was great and believable up until "Two of a kind" and the preceding chapters.
These fillies dont act like kids, they act like teenagers.
And the classes they are taking makes no sense, Trigonometry? Chemistry? I know you said this was an advance learners, but at that age(what im assuming is possibly 5-6) their minds wouldn't be capable of handling all that. Twilight Rising from the ashes? Seriously?
Like i said, its well written, but unbelievable.
Well, this was...for lack of a better phrase, quite a ride and in the spirit of rides, strap yourselves in folks this is going to be a long analysis. Okay, to address the elephant in the room, yes I too share the same sentiments as so many before me have made clear on the whole point of Trixie's joke story telling moment. I could understand it if she were like Varric from Dragon Age II and she isn't reliable narrator; however, thus far Trixie hasn't shown herself to not be reliable (and no you cannot fall back on the the-lack-of-doing-something-does-not-preclude-that-they-can't defense). The reason it worked there is because on the two instances he lies he does it to a) to see if the seeker is gullible and will believe anything he says and b) to hide a painful experience he'd rather forget. That same thing being done because the meeting of Twilight's rival is to Trixie a boring event despite the fact that she has had no problem reciting things that are about as equal in terms of boredom level, approaches insulting. I say insulting because you've had no issue telling parts of your life that to the casual listener within the story would sound like, "Can't find something to give to your favorite adopted sister on her birthday to show that you appreciate her existence despite being blessed with a ton of wealth? Psst, rich pony problems." Now, when it comes to talking about a new pony that adds a new level of complexity and depth, we tell fibs. (i.e. we've spent the last six chapters doing nothing but recitation of events that are mildly interesting in their own right and now we want to show that Trixie can lie, why?) I think Rarity put it best,
In short, it nearly derailed the plot, comes dangerously close to derailing your own character with us now wondering if everything she is telling is just one big fat lie meant to keep Rarity around long enough to help her learn how to knit, and more than likely cost you some readers. Please don't do that again as we the readers don't like it when you do this. There, I said it. Happy elephant? Good, now to move on to my other point, which is Silver Swirl.
I have mixed feelings about her. On the one hand, I like that her Sue-ness is being used in a way that actually makes me not mind having her around. If anything, she serves more as a point to provide a physical comparison of Twilight's limitations in the same way Twilight serves to show Trixie's limitations. Heck, I even liked her calmly staring down Evil Lord Twilight when she started pulling a Palatine and went all "Unlimited POWER!". On the other however, I question the idea that she is both the guardian of the elements and older than Celestia. This raises more questions than answers such as:
1. Why does she have this power and why is she only now making herself known?
2. Why she in an advanced magical educational institute for young ponies when all the knowledge that they are learning she would already know (i.e. is her sole reason for being here limited to finding the next wielder of the Elements of Harmony, if so what led her here?)
3. Are the bearers of the elements always six individuals that are like the main six? If so, where does Celestia and Luna fall in that and if there were others in their group what happened to them to ensure that they are not alicorns or even alive now?
4. How did Swirl become an alicorn and is it related to how Celestia and Luna became alicorns?
5. Are Celestia and Luna natural alicorns or are there other ones aside from these two in this story, and for that matter is Nightmare Moon an alicorn too or is she something else and in no way related to Luna at all?
6. Where do the elements come from if she is their guardian?
7. If Silver Swirl is the guardian of the elements, then how did Celestia and Luna get them to defeat Discord?
8. Has there always been a guardian or is she the only one? If she's the only one, what happens when she is no longer in possession of them?
9. Can only one pony wield them or does it have to be multiple ponies to use them and do they have to embody the element they are using?
10. Is Silver Swirl the guardian all the time or some of the time? If she's the guardian all the time, does this mean she can use the elements and further does this also mean that she embodies all the elements at same time and all the time? What happens when she doesn't?
I could go on, but I think you get the point. Her potential godhood, while serving to make her a potential Sue, could potentially hinder your own plot as we would then be left with the question of "why doesn't Silver Spoon solve x problem", or forcing you to come up with reasons as to why she's not around to prevent either Trixie or Twilight from pledging themselves to the forces of darkness for a time (i.e. their mother Moonlight who I pray is not Luna in disguise as that too would raise an Everest size amount of questions). My point is that I urge you caution with the way you want to use her as she could remove all tension in a situation just by merely being there.
Lastly, once again Trixie herself. How is Trixie in this school? Or rather why? I get it Twilight vouched for her but why would she if Trixie is nothing more than the smart lazy scholar? Why enroll somepony who's known to not place much emphasis on doing work when there are others to do it for them into a potentially life ruining situation that you know they will not handle well? And for that matter why does Trixie hate doing work (i.e. why is she lazy)? I could see the argument that she is lazy because she's a rich, spoiled brat; but if that were true why did she pick out a sister in the first place? Why not ask her ninja-stallion-servant to do it if she's so lazy? My point is why is her laziness limited to the educational/ mental actions and not physical actions like knitting? In addition, why does Trixie hate learning or hearing Twilight recite facts that she knows?. If she is easily swayed by just hearing them, then Twilight would win every argument they ever have and Moonlight would simply need to recite facts to force Trixie to do whatever it is she wants, including committing horrible acts against society (i.e. if she is that is her weakness then why isn't she evil already since all it would take for her mom to convince her to do things her way is to start reciting math theorems). And while I'm on the subject of education, I would also like to parrot the question about their age. How old are Twilight and Trixie at this point anyway? Are they young fillies like Apple Bloom or are we dealing with teenagers like Cadence when she was foalsitting Twilight? They can be in an advance school at a young age, but a little clarity on what age they are to begin with would be nice. On a quick side note, this is also why I hate time skips as we are left wondering what happened in the in between time we are not privy to, how does what happened relate to the events that are transpiring now, and also have are characters attitudes changed to a significant degree in that time to affect them now? Yes, I know that this is still the beginning but at least two of those could be answered in a quick sentence or paragraph by none other than our narrator herself in a q&a session between her and Rarity.
Overall, I'm a bit torn about this chapter and the last one. This and the previous chapter didn't really reveal much about the story. The only thing we learned is that Silver Swirl is smart as our two protagonist and that somehow Trixie and Twilight learned that she older and more powerful than she looks, for some reason. And while I am among those that were outraged at the potential plot derailment/ trolling that the readers suffered for a chapter and a half, I did find the stuff that came before to be a little intriguing (the quick debate about their mother was nice as it showed that Trixie does harbor some animosity towards Twilight's relationship with Moonlight even after the time skip) and the part in the café was also nice as we see Silver Swirl try to cheer Trixie up about her cutie mark and generally being friendly towards two fillies/ young mares she has only just met, however the part that came before it and the recovery attempt that followed left me doing a literal thinking man for about a week.
And now for the minor nitpick/ gripe:
Doctor Hooves- I don't know who he is, why he's qualified to teach advanced magic, what that thing on his desk is, why everyone likes him and I'm not going waste my time trying to figure out why there is a huge following for the show "Doctor Who" which I have never seen nor care to see despite the near billion times I have heard references and been told to watch it. Making a nod to a niche group of people/ fans is always a risky business as those who are in the know will always find enjoyment at the acknowledgement of their knowledge while those not in the know are forced to either submit and find out about it or remain in the dark until they decide to give in. That isn't to say don't appeal to the things you like else why would you be here writing stories. Nor am I saying, don't cater to fans of something as that argument is flawed on its premise alone. However, what I am saying is don't introduce something that has little to nothing to do with your story other than for a simple nod to its fan base (i.e. the whole Derpy fiasco). This is especially annoying when you do it as a nod, get called out for it, then try to find half-hearted reasons for its inclusion outside of that nod. In short, crowd pleasing is a very risky gamble (not to say that you are doing that but from my perspective that's what it looks like--I am more than likely heavily over-thinking this) and is best done on a very limited scale as you can't please everyone all the time.
At this point, I'm guessing you're actually Discord, but you decided to come to Earth to troll us humans with stories about the ponies who beat you and made you their friend.
2167085 Keep reading, it's not what it seems. Remember that TRIXIE is the one telling the story.
So uh, are you ever going to have Twilight meet the other Mane Sixs?
Way to troll
Im sure you were about to lose some readers .the fact that rarity didn say a single word in previous chapter makes one to think this turn wasnt planned but you were brilliant all the time so thsat had to be a troll atempt. ...seriously not cool..
Yeah Trixie, not everyone likes having Michael Bbay every five minutes!
I just knew that Trixie was making that up about Twilight and Silver fighting like that. For a protege to go and open wounds is so wrong in every way.
2169790
Not to mention a protege of the princess being an ass by opening old wounds.