Man in a Pony’s World

by Nugget27

A Meeting Between a Princess and a Human

Bob sat down on a log let out a long exhale through his nose. He had been walking around for the better part of an hour, and he had still yet to calm down. How could he? He got piled with a bunch of work that he only just managed to do without messing up, only to not even be acknowledged for what he had done beyond his report card. He brought his hands up to his face and dragged them down as he remained silent. There was a small break in the Everfree Forest that he had found, which opened up into a small little meadow that had a small pond. It was… something nice and quiet, far and away from the ponies.

The same creatures that preach love, friendship, and acceptance had screwed him over oh so thoroughly.

First, he had to live out in the wilderness, stealing food from ponies just to survive, and even fight back against those ponies when they catch him stealing. His scarred body was more than enough proof for how much he had been through during just his first year in Equestria. Now this? Bob sat and pondered upon whether or not he should continue with this punishment, or say ‘screw it’ and just throw himself in the pond to let all of his problems… sink away. Or to run away from Equestria and pray to God that Celestia doesn’t hunt him down.

A rustling in the bushes let the young man immediately know that he wasn’t alone. He wasn’t surprised; he wasn’t an idiot. He hears rumors and has read tales of what happens to whoever wanders into the Everfree. Most of those rumors and rumors tend to not end well. “Maybe whatever’s watching me will kill me quickly,” the human grumbled as he turned his focus back on his reflection in the water. His face was the one part of his body that wasn’t physically scarred, but he could see just how… He was so tired. He hadn’t gotten any sleep, he was physically tired, mentally he was at his end because of writing that damned song with Twilight… He couldn’t get killed just yet, he still has to thank her for helping him out so much with rewriting that song.

As the human sat on his log, he stared down into his reflection in the pond. Was it really too much to ask to be treated as a person? Was it too much to ask for any pony to consider how he feels? Apple Jack pushed him too hard on the farm and only really felt bad when he finally got hurt, Rarity treats him well, but doesn’t go out of her way to spend time with him. Fluttershy… She’s very nice, very sweet. She does go out of her way to seek Bob out, but she probably thinks of the human as an animal. Twilight, she’s nice, he’ll admit that, but she’s probably only doing so because her mentor, who happened to be the ruler of the very country Twilight lives in, told her to. Rainbow Dash hasn’t done much in the way of talking to Bob, and Pinkie is… a bit too much at times.

Bob only just managed to get out of a welcoming party that the party pony threw in his name.

The human sighed; nothing is going to change. Bob still has a debt to pay, for stealing food and hurting ponies that tried to hurt him for stealing that food. “Why am I repaying ponies for the food I needed? It’s not like I could’ve worked for it anyways. Hell, why am I repaying ponies that struck out at me first? Why the actual living FUCK do I even bother?” There was something rustling in the bushes behind him. Now, the human wasn’t an idiot, he knew of all the horrible things that could possibly happen to him for coming into the Everfree Forest, it’s why he walked in here to begin with. “Finally, something that’ll finally kill me! Fuck, I don’t even know why I cling onto life so much!”

The rustling stopped, a breeze made the human shiver. He wore just a tank top and some shorts, since he figured he wouldn’t be seen on stage beyond when his name… would’ve been called so that he could be credited for his hard work.

“Fuck it, I’m going to go back to Ponyville and probably find a rope. I’m sure Pinkie will love a human shaped pinata!” Despite the human’s attempts to follow the path he took into the forest, he still got lost. He was pretty sure that he stopped paying attention to where he was going three steps into the forest because of just how mad he is. Slowly, but surely, Bob was more and more sure that he was just not going to find his way back to… He paused as he stopped at a rope bridge. It really never sunk into the human before he thought of it.

He had nowhere to call home. Sure, he lived in Ponyville, and he lived in Twilight’s library, but he couldn’t really call that home. Sure, he liked the purple unicorn that was his roommate, as long as she didn’t call him barbaric, or compare him to an animal, but it still wasn’t home. Maybe with some tools, and some time, and money, he could build a place he could call home. At least, until Celestia would be willing to send him back home, which she won’t be until he ‘repays his debt to society’ or whatever. As he got across the bridge, he stopped in awe.

Just before him were the ruins of a castle. They were very clearly worse for wear, and were in the middle of a forest full of monsters that might eat him while he’s sleeping, but… he could call this home! Away from ponies, nobody would know he’s here, and he could live off the land… “Fuck, I’m going to have to steal food again if I live here; I can’t grow anything worth a damn.” If only he were a horse, then he could eat grass, then, he wouldn’t be casted out, or treated differently.

Maybe then, he could be happy.

As the human stepped foot in the castle, he immediately began looking around… only to jump when he heard hoofsteps. It was kind of hard to not miss them, since hooves were pretty loud, as is, and were even louder on hardwood, or stone floors. “I wot ‘tis been a thousand years, yet surely I would know where my bed chambers are.” A feminine voice sighed. “Haply they were surprised when I turned into Nightmare Moon.” Bob hid behind a fallen pillar as… a dark blue alicorn slowly came into view.

To say she was beautiful, by pony standards, was an understatement. Her fur was… flawless, perfectly dark blue, with no tangles or scruff that the human could see from his hiding place. She had a starry mane and tail that flowed in a nonexistent wind much like Princess Celestia’s did. Except this alicorn’s mane and tail more resembled the night sky than a rainbow. She wore black, diamond jewelry that mainly comprised of a necklace… and that was it. There was a crown made of a similar material and she had light blue horse shoes. So she was clearly royalty of some kind.

What on earth was a Princess doing in a dump like this?

Bob leaned on his pillar as he watched the alicorn go to and fro, across the abandoned, destroyed throne room. Then… didn’t notice when he pushed a piece of rock off of the pillar. The alicorn jumped. “Whom goes there?” She shouted. “If there are looters, we will toss thou ‘i a dungeon for stealing royal property!” her eyes quickly landed on Bob. “What kind of foul creature are thou?” Her eyes squinted. Her horn lit up and Bob quickly found himself floating in front of the blue alicorn. “Praytell, why are thou hither? Human?”

“...you know what I am?” Bob asked.

“Of course, our sister told us told us about a creature she found some few over a month since. A ‘human’ she bid it.” She started to glare at him. “Thou were meant to be ‘in Ponyville, why are thou i’ our corky castle? Trying to run aroint from thy punishment?” She asked.

“I’m not. I’m just mad at a few ponies and ran out into the Everfree forest… You are asking me why I’m here, right? I can barely understand what the heck you’re saying.”

“Of course. Say to us, why are thou enchafed? Are mine subjects not treating you well?”

“Enchafed?” Bob tilted his head.

“Forgive us, we are still adjusting to modern Equestrian. “Why are thou mad?”

“School play. You wouldn’t care.”

“Yet I doth, if it made thou join all the way out hither, what… happened at this ‘school play’, young human?” The Princess had set him down.

“I was tasked to do something for the play, since my whole class was meant to contribute to it in some way. I got to play the music used in the play, the violin, guitar, and the drums. I had to play three instruments, sing, and I gotta say, as stressful as it was, I had fun…” Bob smiled for a brief moment… “Then my teacher, who was also the director, couldn’t even be asked to tell the audience that I had anything to do with the play. All she did was give me an A for theater, and called it a day!” Bob let out a long, deep breath. “I just wanna be treated like a person, not some fucking animal. Ponies assume I don’t have feelings, and it’s fucking frustrating.”

Luna tilted her head, before glaring even harder. “Our knowledge on plays and shows haply outdated, yet e’en we know that thou should’st credit everypony involved, no? Didst that fall out of practice while we were towards the moon?”

“Keyword, your highness, ‘everypony’. I don’t fit that category.”

“Neigh! That shall not doth! Join, we shall take thee back to Ponyville, and correct thy teacher! Haply I shall yell at mine sister for punishing a child, whom was clearly struggling to survive ‘i the wilderness, alone, as well!”

“You can take me back to Ponyville, if that wouldn’t be too much trouble. Please don’t yell at my teacher on my behalf; I already did that when I wasn’t credited for my work.”

“Get on our back, we shall carry thou to Ponyville then. Thou are staying with mine sister’s pupil, Twilight Sparkle, yes?” Bob nodded. He reached out to…

“Wait, this won’t be awkward, will it? Me being on your back and all.”

“Nein,” Luna plainly said.

“Okay…” Bob put his hand on Luna, who was as tall as he was before stopping. “Wow… your fur is so soft!” He almost squealed. “Oh… That is a crime; you probably won’t let me pet you, or hug you,” the human said as he climbed on the alicorn’s back.

“Pet us? We are not an animal, young human. Praytell, what is thy name? It would be rude to call thou ‘young human’.”

“It’s Bob. And… I know you’re not an animal. You’re way, way too smart to be considered just an animal. Though Twilight Sparkle is pretty smart, and she doesn’t mind when I scratch her ears; she actually likes it.”

“Well, thou may scratch our ears? We’d doth it ourselves yet mine teeth canst not reach ‘em, and hooves are horrible for getting scratches. Consider this… a favor that thy Princess ask of thee.”

“Say no less,” Bob did as asked, and Luna’s Princess Face broke. Her Princess Mood broke as well. She cooed before leaning into the human’s palm.

“This is nice,” she lowered herself to the ground and Bob got off her back to sit beside her. “Thy paws are lovely. We might not but say to our sister about these!” She hummed. “Perhaps we shall even lift thy sentence when we return… Thou never strike us as a criminal throughout our engagement.” And… Bob hugged her. “Eep! Unhoof us…” She hummed again. “This actually feels nice. Perhaps thou wouldn’t mind being friends with us? Then thou may hug and pet us as thee please!”

“It… would be nice to have somebody I can call a friend.”

“Then thou shall call me Luna!” The Princess nuzzled her human. “And Celestia will not be allowed to receive hugs from thee! As thou art mine!”

Author's Note:

i was gonna have chrysalis in here, but figured having Bob run into Luna, who’s trying to look for something in her old home, would make more sense.

Chryssy and the changelings will play a factor, but not for a while.

gonna also keep this chapter short, as I wanted to establish Bob’s new friend first and foremost.

i also think Luna would warm up to Bob pretty quickly, mostly because he is still a kid, and would probably sympathize with Bob over how he was overshadowed by the rest of his class and not paid his dues.

Comments

[Theresa hall]

How is it that the out of date princess understands this bit of basic manners yet the teacher doesn't?

[FoxyLove]

YES!!!! Luna deserves ALL the HUGS!!!!

At least in this story.

[Solar_Wolf]

Luna is 1,000 years out of date and she has more common sense than most every pony in Ponyville but each out what you say remember bob she is 1,000 years out of date in her mind setting I slip of a word can mean something else to her

[Skyblazer9]

11751752
Indeed she does deserve all the hugs unlike the xenophobic ponies who have treated him like garbage!!

[6mike161]

11751724
Maybe ponies were less racist in her era but they became more xenophobic while Luna was banished.

[Solar_Wolf]

[6mike161]

11752092
I said less racist not not racist at all

[AgentKorpsman]

11751936
Yeah I wonder who let that happened in the first place

*looks over to a certain princess and nobles*

[lastbreathjared]

11751755
*cough cough* the og man in pony world story *cough cough*