4. For the Want of Magic
For the last few months, Rarity had been devastated that her life’s passion up to that point was in shreds. Most days she retreated into her room and almost entirely refused to leave, her parents were obviously worried but didn’t know how to handle it.
But, one day, Rarity came down to breakfast to find her parents had packed bags and hopeful smiles.
“What… Mom? Dad? Traveling again already?” Rarity asked glumly as she slumped into her seat at the eating table.
“Well not just us Rarity, we have a little bit of a surprise for you.” Her mother said as she slid a plate of toast in front of her. “Eat up hon, we have to catch the noon train!”
“Noon train? Wait… We? As in- me too?”
“That’s right, we’re going to Canterlot for the weekend!”
Rarity’s eyes went wide, even though her fashion dreams were in the gutter, visiting Canterlot was a dream come true— the sights, the refinement, the majesty, everything about the capital. Rarity could hardly contain her excitement.
“Oh… Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!” The filly jumped up and gave both her parents a hug. She floated her toast into her mouth and rushed off to her room to pack her bag.
~~~
The train ride was uneventful but Rarity bounced in her seat the whole ride.
“Now Arriving: Canterlot Station!” the conductor said as the train pulled in.
The crowd at the station was massive but Rarity was so caught up in the sights of everything that she didn’t notice the pink filly in front of her until both tumbled into each other, Rarity accidently smashing a bottle open as she tripped.
“Oh gosh… I’m so sorry!” Rarity said as she helped the other filly up.
She responded with a strangely dated accent, “All is well, no harm done… Thank you for helping me up but I must go.”
The filly gave a quick bow to the confused Rarity before galloping into the throng and catching up with a red unicorn. Looking down at the smashed vial, the label was soaked through but she could make out ‘Silk-eaf Extract Mag-al Ac-ler-t’.
“Huh… weird,” Rarity thought to herself as she caught up to her parents but something felt off.
Like that day with the rock, Rarity felt magic flow into her horn without her control. She screwed her eyes shut but her magic was already weaving its way free. Around the station, gems of all kinds floated away from their owners accompanied by cries of surprise and indignation. Meanwhile, Rarity had braced herself on a column as the gems started floating around her.
Her parents made their way out of the train and tried to get their daughter’s attention to ease her out of her magical surge, but with no luck. The rapidly growing sphere of gemstones finally caught the notice of the guards and a particularly brave private leaped into action, charging into the storm of jewels.
“Hey! Hey kid!” The guard said, shaking Rarity to get her attention. “I’m here to help, what’s your name?”
Rarity winced but replied through gritted teeth, “R- Rarity… My name is Rarity.”
“Rarity, alright. I need you to breathe, can you do that for me?”
The white filly nodded as she sucked in a sharp breath through gritted teeth. It seemed to make things worse as the whirlwind of gems grew larger again, but the guard lit his horn as well as a rose light surrounded the two. Rarity’s breathing steadied as the whirlwind calmed down before dispersing, jewelry clattering to the ground around the duo.
Before Rarity could give thanks to the young guard that saved her, her parents galloped up and scooped Rarity up in their forelegs.
“Oh thank you sir!” her mother said between smothering Rarity.
The guard responded with a chuckle, “Just doing my job Ma’am, I got a baby sister myself so I recognized a surge when I saw it.”
Rarity looked down in embarrassment as more guards and huffy socialites gathered around to respectively question her and collect their belongings. After clearing up none of the magic was intentional, most ponies cleared off, except one. A green maned unicorn who picked up his inadvertently purloined cravat but turned to address the young filly.
“Your name, young lady. Rarity, was it?” He said with the gentle tone of a teacher.
“Oh! Yes, yes it is good sir,” Rarity forced out looking up at the older gentlepony, “Uh… Sorry about… Whatever it was I pulled off of you.”
“Oh it’s quite alright young lady... I noticed, however, that was quite a lot of magic you were slinging around, if quite out-of-control.”
The stallion reached into his saddlebag and floated out a brochure for Rarity’s parents, “Allow me to cut to the chase, my name is Wiser Wits and I’m a professor at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. The display of magic from your daughter is, pardon the pun, a rarity and would do well with cultivation. Which is why, with your permission, I would like to sponsor your daughter for a spot at CSGU.”
The sudden revelation was too much for Rarity to handle as she promptly fainted onto her luggage.
~~~
Dear Diary,
Oh I just had the most wonderful day! Well… apart from my magic acting up again but it led to something good this time! It got me noticed! Eeeeeeeee! Ok, I should probably explain what that means, a professor at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns only the most prestigious school in Canterlot, maybe even the Kingdom! Anyway! Professor Wits is his name and he’s so nice! He said that he would sponsor me when the next entrance exam rolls around! (Mother and Father were happy to hear that he would be covering expenses)
He also said that I have the most potential he’s seen in a filly in all his years! I have a real shot at finally being a Canterlot Pony!
~~~ 6 Months Before the Entrance Exam ~~~
Rarity found herself at Canterlot Library, snout buried in some book about Thaumaturgical Basics, and barely understanding any of it. She had tried asking for help from passing ponies but almost all of them barely acknowledged her presence, those that did were maybe worse.
“What are you doing here?”
“Learn to speak properly, bumpkin.”
“I think everything in these halls is too advanced for you, country girl.”
Rarity sighed as she set the book down and stared at the ceiling, Canterlot wasn’t at all like she imagined. The scraping of a chair shook Rarity back to the present. She tilted her head to see a teal pony pushing over a seat next to her.
“Hey, you seem a bit out of your depth,” she said frankly.
“... I really am, I think.” Rarity responded.
“Maybe I could help,” the teal mare said brightly, “I mean I’m not the top of my class or anything but, I’m passing at least!”
Rarity was skeptical at the random filly’s help and tried her best to put on a front of control, “And… Why should I trust you? Considering the absolutely horrid manners of the rest of the ponies I’ve had the displeasure of meeting today.”
The teal pony laughed, “Oh don’t worry I’m not like the jerks that are everywhere here, but I guess I didn’t introduce myself.”
She put out a hoof for Rarity to shake, “Lyra Heartstrings! From Ponyville too actually.”
Rarity shook the mare’s hoof but froze when she mentioned Ponyville, “Wait, how did you know?!”
“Aside from the rest of the library treating you like dirt on their hooves?” Lyra said, “Well, rumors travel fast, and I heard about something happening at the train station yesterday about some filly from Ponyville having a surge. That was you wasn’t it?”
“Uh… Yeah, that’s about right… You were nice enough to give me your name, mine's Rarity Belle.”
“Nice to meet ya’ then Rarity!” Lyra said, smiling again as she took a seat next to her.
“Nice to meet you too, but you mentioned class?”
“Oh, yeah I’m a first year at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns.”
“Wait really?! I’m studying for the next entrance exam!”
“Oh! I should have guessed with all these prep books! I remember most of these but… What’s with these books on history?”
“Oh, well back home at least history was one of the few subjects I enjoyed and it helped with—” Rarity cut herself off, the wound from her failed fashion attempts still raw, “... With a hobby. I just thought it’d give me something to stand out with.”
“Oh that’s cool!” Lyra said, “And yeah, definitely. A friend of mine, Moondancer, is a real genius at everything and that’s kinda how she got in!”
Rarity simply nodded as she floated the book back in front of her, now that she had somepony to look through it with her.
“I mean… It's the spell construction that's tripping me up the most right now,” Rarity said as she floated over her answer sheet.
“Ooh, yeah memorizing those formulas is tough,” Lyra said, flipping through the Thaumaturgy book Rarity had.
“Here! Section three! Actually this is what I'm learning about now,” Lyra said with a giggle.
“Oh thank you!” Rarity said as she checked through her notes, “You're a lifesaver Lyra.”
“Hey no problem, us Ponyville gals have to stick together right?”
For the first time all day, Rarity smiled and giggled along with Lyra until a librarian came to shush the two.
~~~
Dear Diary,
Ok well things didn’t go how I expected but, well I think I found a friend! Maybe.
I should explain what I mean… Canterlot ponies are so mean! None of them are like the courteous ponies in the stories! All day, they’ve just been complete (pardon my prench, diary) wankers! But… I suppose that’s how real life is. I mean, not that I haven’t found good ponies here! This page would be covered in tear stains if that were the case. Eventually a nice pony actually came to help me as I was, frankly, stumbling my way through textbooks. Her name was Lyra Heartstrings, and actually she was from Ponyville too. Told me her mother is of minor nobility and pulled some strings to get her an audience at CSGU as well, just with the difference of a few months. So she knows what I’m going through with my studying and offered to help me! We’re supposed to meet tomorrow at the park, I don’t know if this means we’re friends yet but… A lady can hope I suppose.
~~~ The Next Day ~~~
“Rarity! Over here!” Lyra called out from the picnic blanket she sat on, her other friends craning their heads to see who she was calling to.
Rarity trotted over, saddlebags heavy with study books, as Lyra threw a hoof around the bashful filly, “Glad you made it! Let me introduce you to the girls.”
“Minuette was the most excited to meet you,” Lyra pointed to another spiky haired pony who eagerly waved to Rarity.
“Nice to meet you!” Minuette said.
“Over there is Lemon Heart, she's got four left hooves sometimes but she's the nicest pony I know,” the aptly yellow coated mare looked up from her sandwich with a smile.
Another white coated filly sidled up to Rarity, “I'll introduce myself before Miss Chatterbox over here says something embarrassing about me. I’m Twinkleshine, a pleasure to meet you luv.”
“Hey! I was gonna give a good impression of you!” Lyra said, “And over there, with her muzzle in a book, is Moondancer!”
The bespeckled filly jerked up at her name being said and gave a nervous wave that Rarity was half tempted to mirror.
“And uh… Yeah, looks like she’s still not here…” Lyra mumbled under her breath before she perked back up, “So I guess that’s everypony!”
Rarity looked around at the group with a small smile before gingerly taking a seat near the edge of the blanket and trying her best to sound refined, “It’s uh- It’s very much a pleasure to meet you all as well.”
Twinkleshine gave a sisterly chuckle, “Oh don’t worry too much about tone with us luv, we aren’t exactly upper crust here.”
Nods of assent all around as Lyra threw a hoof around Rarity, “Besides, we need to get you into CSGU, eh?”
“What do you mean by that?” Moondancer asked, looking up from her book again.
Rarity floated a textbook out of her saddlebag and answered, “Well… Lyra here found me studying at Canterlot Library… For the next entrance exam at CSGU.”
That got the group’s attention as Rarity fidgeted under their stares, before the group erupted into excited gushing.
“-Oh! We could have a study group!-”
“-I have some prep books you could have-”
“-Oh I always wanted an underclasspony to mentor!-”
Rarity scooched back from the ponies swarming her before somepony clearing their throat got all their attention, as Moondancer set down her book.
“Let’s not swarm the poor girl now,” she calmly addressed everypony, “it seems pretty clear we’re all ready to help… So Rarity, where do you want to start?”
“Oh- uh well… I’ve been having trouble with memorizing some of the spell constructions.”
Moondancer cracked a small smile, “Let’s hop to it then.”
~~~
Dear Diary,
Today was fun! Met Lyra’s friends, well I guess my friends now too! I can’t believe I’m actually looking forward to studying… Then again my alternative is sitting sadly alone in the library with passive aggressive stares from everypony that passes me by, soooooooo.
Suppose this is the better alternative, wouldn’t you say?
~~~ 3 Months before the Entrance Exam ~~~
Rarity didn’t know why she let her friends convince her coming to this party was a good idea.
“C’moooooon Rarity! You can’t just lock yourself in the library until the Entrance Exam, you gotta relax! Even Moondancer took breaks when she was studying!”
“I resent that but, Lyra’s unfortunately correct… Honestly, I don’t think I’ve seen you anywhere other than here, the park, and your dorm. Besides, studies have shown that letting the mind rest helps stimulate information retention.”
“Uh… Translate from nerd, luv?”
Moondancer sighed from Twinkleshine butting in, “It means that she’ll remember things better if she gives herself a break. Look, you can stand right with me and we can leave after an hour, alright?”
And Moondancer kept her promise… For the first few minutes before she got dragged off by a band of classmates, which left Rarity unfortunately trapped at the Cute-ceañera of a pony she didn’t even know, kicking her hooves in the corner of a fancy garden.
“I should have just stayed home with Lemon Heart…” Rarity thought glumly as she stared out at the crowd.
As an uneducated, country filly on top of not having a cutie mark, really, it was a surprise the jeering didn’t start sooner.
“Oh, you must be that commoner that’s looking to get into CSGU!” A rich colt said as he sauntered up with this posse, at least they had the decency to be upfront about their prejudice.
Rarity scowled and buried her head in a book she slipped into her saddlebag when none of her friends were looking.
“I bet she doesn’t even know how to speak the proper tongue without butchering it with contractions!”
“She’s a blank flank too,” a filly said as she sauntered behind Rarity, “I bet her cutie mark is going to be a rake or some other menial task… She might be my gardener in a few years!”
That brought mean spirited laughter to all her tormentors as Rarity blushed from the embarrassment and tried to slip away but they had surrounded her.
One of the unicorns of the group ripped the book out of her grasp as he tauntingly held it above her, “Hey! Give that back, you cur!”
Rarity felt her magic threatening to surge but she tamped down her frustration and bit her tongue but, the ponies around her were definitely making it difficult to stay calm.
“Oh she does speak after all!” The unicorn held the book up to read the title, “A History of Canterlot... Hah! As if a commoner like you could ever hope to understand the histories of our most noble houses!”
The unicorn flippantly threw the book over his shoulder with a condescending look to Rarity. She saw the book soar across the room before it was caught in… A familiar yellow aura.
“Blueblood,” Lyra said tersely as she followed the arc of the thrown book to the crowd surrounding Rarity.
“Ah, the other commoner! I suppose you all know each other with how inbr-” Blueblood was cut off by Lyra.
“Yes, thank you for stringing together utterly horrid sentences, you oaf,” Lyra ignored Blueblood and stomped her way past, only to be blocked by the rest of the crowd.
“Oh… the half-breed is here to ruin our fun?”
“Not just her luv,” Twinkleshine sauntered. “You’re the mare of the hour, Jade Timepiece… Frankly, atrocious behavior of a host and I’m regretting accepting this invitation if this is how you treat one of my friends.”
The green pony was thrown into shock at the accusation, which let Minuette and Moondancer push their way through the crowd and grab Rarity. The gang now together, they formed a circle around their friend.
“I think we’ll be taking our leave,” Minuette said as she glared at anypony that tried to stop the group from leaving the garden.
In the cool Canterlot streets, Rarity let out a sigh of relief, “Thank you girls… Really, truely, thoroughly, thank you…”
“No need luv,” Twinkleshine said, “really if anything we should be apologizing to you for dragging you out here…”
“No, no! You were right… I’ve been working myself to the bone and I needed a break… Just a poor choice of how to do it, huh?”
Rarity’s light barb made laughter bubble up from her friends, genuine laughter unlike the venomous jeering from the party.
Lyra spoke up, “Well day’s still young… Y’know I heard there was a new donut place, maybe we could check it out?”
The gang excitedly bantered as Lyra took the head of the group to lead the girls along, and Rarity eased back into quiet contentment as she cracked a small smile.
~~~
Dear Diary,
Oh I just have the best of friends, well I say that but this started as one of the worst of days but I digress. So my friends, how I adore them but in this specific instance they irritated me to no end, dragged me out to join them for a Cute-ceañera but well… We’re all blank flanks as of now and things… Went badly the second I got separated from them to say the least.
(Honestly, I don’t think my trust in Canterlot will ever recover. Perhaps that’s a good thing though)
Anyway, frankly embarrassing story cut short, my friends came to save me from the absolute wankers that accosted me for both my status as common folk and as a blank flank. Needless to say, my friends all burned a lot of bridges today… All in my defense… Honestly, I can’t thank them enough.
I’m writing this entry in this donut place that Lyra learned about and, to be honest? Their Trotston Creme Pies are to die for an
lyra dragging me away now, finish lat
~~~ Day of the Entrance Exam ~~~
Even with all her studying, Rarity still felt like the time sped by so quickly. But, with the preparation of her new friends, she did feel confident. Her parents had procured another set of tickets to come see their daughter’s examination (Rarity would deny running up and embracing them both for a solid five minutes).
Her friends were there also, cheering her on and wishing good luck as they walked with the Belles to the examination hall. But, finally, the hour of the examination was at hoof as she was ushered to a seat in one of the massive lecture halls and the written exam started.
Rarity cracked a smile as she tore through the pages, questions easily coming to her like water. Even spell construction didn’t give her an issue! She grinned as she read the open response section about the history of Starswirl the Bearded’s Crystal Mirror and dove into her writing. She ran out of space but nopony said that she was limited to one page, so she asked a couple of foals around her for their blank pages. It earned her a few strange looks but she ignored them and pressed on.
“Time!” The pony proctor called out, “Everypony, quills down and I will come to collect your responses.”
“Drat! I had more to say…” Rarity thought as she straightened her exam and handed it to the proctor.
~~~
As the foals were separated and ushered to their practical exams, Rarity felt the creep of anxiety fall over her like a heavy blanket as everypony was left to stew while the proctors looked over their exams. Finally, it was her turn as she was called into the test room.
“Ok just relax… I can't let my magic get the better of me…” Rarity thought as she took a deep breath, and pushed the door open.
Inside was a set of proctors sitting on a table facing the entrance, windows flanking the door let light shine clearly upon the dragon egg set in the center of the room on a wooden cart.
“Hello Miss Belle.” the center pony said. “My name is Seacoast Breeze. My colleagues and I will be overseeing this test today, nod if you follow so far.”
Rarity did so while swallowing the lump in her throat.
“Good, as you can see in front of you there is a dragon egg. Your task is to attempt to hatch the egg within the allotted time of 1 hour. Nod if you understand.”
Rarity blanched at that. One hour? To hatch a dragon egg?! Her friends said that their practicals were performing their known spells, what was this?!
Rarity numbly nodded as the assembled proctors in front of her all raised their quills, “Your time begins now. Good luck Miss Belle.”
Rarity trotted up to get a good look at the egg, at one point it might have looked purple, but the shell looked rusted somehow, the shell a deep red with streaks of darker magenta. When Rarity put a hoof to it it felt warm, like a bowl of hot soup. Screwing her eyes she dug into her memory for something, anything, on dragons.
A rough memory of Moondancer reading something aloud bubbled up, “Dragon mothers in the wild keep their eggs in bonfires. Their fire breath both keeps the egg warm and lets the parent’s magical signature be imprinted on the baby dragon before birth…”
Rarity took a breath and let magic flow into her horn, feeling it envelop the egg, hoping a connection would spark but nothing seemed to be happening.
“Urgh! What is this? How am I- Why would they even- Do they want me to fail? Is this something I’m meant to fail at for some kind of lesson?!” Rarity’s thoughts churned as the proctors kept staring with unreadable expressions, but that only added fuel to the fire in the filly, “Oh that’s absolutely what’s happening! I can’t believe this!”
Rarity’s feelings mixed with her scattered thoughts and for some reason, her mind wandered back to the same frustration she felt that day when a magic surge brought her into the middle of nowhere for a rock.
Letting out a cry of frustration, she let her control slip for a moment and felt her magic surge through her horn as the egg lifted clear off the ground… with the cart it was on dragged with it.
Her frustration was very rapidly replaced with panic as she realized she was surging again as the proctors bolted out of their seats.
“No! Everytime this happens something goes wrong! I can’t let it this time…” Rarity steeled herself as she focused as hard as she could.
Rarity’s thoughts slipped past her lips unbidden, “I can control it this time! I- I can!”
And as she pulled the reins on her emotions, so too did she pull the reins on her magic as the thaumic force calmed down from a raging storm, to a focused gale. Her magic still tightly gripped on the dragon egg, she saw as cracks began to form. Splitting down from the top of the egg down as the shell fell away to reveal a rust red baby dragon, still wrapped in Rarity’s magic as she gently set it down on the cart.
Panting from the exertion, Rarity turned to look at the proctors who all wore the same look of complete surprise.
“Well?” Rarity called out, “I did it!”
“R- right.” The head proctor said as she composed herself. “Congratulations Miss Belle… You have done something that has not been accomplished by… Any aspirant in nearly 50 years.”
“50 Years?!” Rarity called out in astonishment before the implications of that statement caught up and her anger returned, “Wait, so I was meant to fail!”
“Allow me to finish Miss Belle.” The proctor said, her expression softening, “Yes… The Dragon Egg test is one meant for applicants to fail… Particularly excelling applicants. Your physical exam is… One of the highest scores since the last applicant we gave the Dragon Egg test to.”
Rarity started wondering where this was going.
“It’s a… test of character so to speak, how one reacts to failure. The last applicant failed that test. However, you succeeding is an… Entirely different test passed Miss Belle. Honestly, I can say for certain… Welcome to CSGU.”
Rarity’s face split into a wide grin as she squealed with excitement and started prancing in place.
“Oh… One more thing, Miss Belle.” Seacoast called to get the filly’s attention.
Rarity stopped in her celebration, cleared her throat and listened intently.
“Well, one more congratulation in order really since it seems you hadn’t noticed in your excitement, perhaps you would like to look at your side, dear.”
Rarity followed the proctor’s vision as she looked to her flank and saw a shooting star of blue on her flank, as her excitement peaked once again and she let out a whoop of joy that woke up the baby dragon.
~~~
Hondo and Cookie Belle were of course, proud of their daughter for both getting into such a prestigious school and getting her cutie mark in one day, but they stepped aside so that she could spend the night with the friends that helped her get here (Well,they chaperoned the group going to Pony Joe’s to celebrate at least).
“To Rarity, for doing the impossible!” Lyra said as she raised a donut in toast
“Well not impossible,” Moondancer said as she smiled over her own bite of donut.
“Just let me hype up our friend Moonie,” Lyra said with a pout as Rarity giggled at her antics.
Beside her in a basket was the dragon baby she hatched, soundly asleep.
“So, what you thinking of naming it luv?” Twinkleshine said as she nudged Rarity’s side.
“It’s not an it!” Rarity said defensively, “He’s a wonderful baby dragon… But also I haven’t the slightest clue.”
“What about Spike?” Minuette said, “Y’know cus the… Spikes.”
“Eh, bit too on the nose don’t you think?”
“Sumseff?” Lyra said through a mouthful of donut.
“Sunset doesn’t have the right ring either…”
“Perihelion?” Moondancer supplied as everypony but Rarity gave her a look of confusion, “What? It can be shortened to Peri… That’s cute…”
“Well, yeah I like it too but… Actually, I think I got one.”
Rarity picked up the baby dragon with her magic as the rest of her friends waited to hear her name.
“I think I’ll call you Jasper… Since you look like the gem.”
The baby dragon yawned in seeming agreement as the girls all cooed at the adorable reaction.
Rarity knew that this was only the start of things to come, but she felt like she could take on all of it.
So heeeeeeeey everypony. Been busy with college with miderms and such and uh-
My looming 100 Hours on Darktide after getting it the day after I published Mena's Chapter
Other things 
(What can I say, killin' 'eretics is fun).
Needless to say, even without college stress and... other hobbies, this chapter was a bit tough for me. Despite Rarity technically being the Main Character in this timeline, I found myself in actually a kinda similar situation to Fluttershy's chapter where I was a bit lost on how to take her but now I think I got her set for the right path!
Welp, that's 3 down, 3 to go! Next up is Twilight! This one I'm gonna have some fun with 
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Ok I can definitely see how you struggled with this chapter, yet made it work beautifully! Great job.
Hey there. Thanks greatly for the dialogue, characterizations and future chapter set-up. Definitely liked that one guard helping Rarity through that surge on the train before Rarity's first meeting with Lyra. And also liked Rarity's meetings with Lyra's other friends (aside from Bon Bon, obviously, but that's probably for later anyway). And yeah, Definitely liked the Canterlot Five stepping in to help Rarity out with the bullies. And glad to see Rarity doing well in the entrance exam before the Dragon Egg part. And glad Rarity was able to control her magic enough to hatch the egg without anything else happening (other than getting her mark anyway). And the nods to Twilight's earlier attempt (both doing well before the Dragon Egg part AND the "giving up too soon" being the reason she failed [which means she really WOULD do a lot better in a school that had far less pressure]). And the list of possible names for the Dragon (including the canon Spike) before Rarity decided on Jasper were good stuff. And, yes, concerning Sunset Shimmer was a pretty terrible bully before she was made to see the light quite some time later, it makes sense that Rarity and her Canterlot friends would find the name "Sunset" to be rather distasteful.
Of course, now we've got Loyalty, Kindness and Magic covered. That leaves Laughter, Honesty and Generosity. Of course, Applejack is probably going to end up getting Generosity (since Honesty is her CANON Element [which rules THAT ONE out] and she would probably be too serious for Laughter), Twilight might get Laughter (from learning how to work through most of her worst issues and laugh off misfortune with Cadance's help - not to mention her magic is at a level where, if she put her mind to it, she could easily become a MUCH less jerkish Discord), which would leave Honesty for Rainbow. Though, I admit that all of these guesses could be wrong.
Anyway, really looking forward to more of this.
11740162
That guard's actually a familiar face, if one not named
(He'll show up next chapter but that's giving the game away huh?)
And glad that my explanation for why Twilight is seemingly the only one from CSGU with a dragon makes sense lol
As for Sunset... Well probably common knowledge to a few of the Canterlot Crew if not Rarity. But that storyline definitely wont be for a while (wherein Rarity lives out all of our nightmares: Having to go through High School again)
11740142
Aw thank you! Luckily next chapter should give me less grief because I've had a bunch of ideas for that one I haven't had the chance to put into motion yet
11740170
And that's perfectly fine. Take your time. Good stories take time to craft right (I should know....*stares blankly at the abyss that is my many incomplete works on here*)!
So is Jasper is a completly new different character from the Spike we all know?
11740196
More like Spike with a palette swap on him lol (But, yes, but it's more differences in being raised by Rarity rather than Twilight)
11740201
So...dose that mean that Jasper would develop a crush on Twilight when they first meet? Like what happened when Spike met Rairty for the first time?
Is Rarity a mommy now?
Rarity's cutie mark looks fantastic! Next is Rainbow Dash. I'll be willing to see what type of cutie mark she will get.
Here's a song that will make you natural. Enjoy!
https://youtu.be/V5M2WZiAy6k?si=CUbqZDisHgdi1IMv
More good
A red dragon...
I don't know why, but I almost wanna assume that this is Garble, but of course, renamed to Jasper. I'm probably wrong, but that's my best guess. Everyone else had switched elements, so maybe it's not too big of a leap to assume.
lovely
Usually, I like going into these first stories with the intention of offering some constructive criticism, but honestly, there ain't much here to criticize. Other than a few times where you could have shown without telling and writing numbers out (Eight instead of 8), you've pretty much aced it. You have a fun premise, and believable characters, and the plot is strung together with a relatively logical series of events that never go so far as to strain credulity.
10/10 can't wait to see where you take this and most of all what happens to the remaining mane six!
I wasn’t sure how this was going to go, but it’s pretty good. The challenge now is if and how this Rarity also finds she needs friends - because she has some good ones at the moment
Lol I've been meaning to reinstall darktide thanks for reminding me
Finally checked this one out, and I kind of want to slap past me with a pool noodle for taking so long. This is wonderful!
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As the Emperor Wills! (I am a basic bitch and have been playing solely Vet lmao, I do have a Psyker named Twilight in the wings though lol)
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Thank you! and I've been there for fic lol but glad you've given me a chance
Really liking this so far, good stuff here!!
I’ve always wanted a story like this, can’t wait for applejacks chapter. Hope your doing well
Another great chapter. Well done.:D
New chapter, more fun! Let's get to it then!
Finally we see the- I was gonna say titular character but that doesn't really make sense, let's go with our Main main protagonist! It was fun (albeit sad) to see the deconstruction of Rarity's image of the capital and honestly I don't blame her at all, at least when she's an adult she knows how to be able to deal with the backlash in her own way but to a child? Of course that'll shatter her perfect image of Canterlot!
It's very nice though to see not everypony is is as vile as the others and Rarity managed to slot right in to as kind a friend group as Lyra and co. so much praises to them!
With how violent Twilight's surge were in canon were It's odd (though not unwelcome) to see such a comparatively tame magic surge. And we gotta say thank you to the brave Guard who stepped in, I'm sure we'll see more of him! I also really like Professor Wits, he's a very nice pony!
Absolute favorite scene so far however has to be the egg hatching scene and ugh i love the explanation you came up with on why such an extremely difficult test would be grounds for Twilight not getting in, it just made sense! I also really like the Proctor's reactions as well as the donut shop scene right after, they were very fun!
Over all a very good introduction to the Element of Magic and sets up some very interesting story elements in the future! I'm also really surprised no one has yet to comment on the fact Celestia isn't anywhere to be seen seeing as she was quite essential to the upbringing of canon Twilight but hey ho.
Speaking of Twi, can't wait for her Chapter! After all she's my most anticipated chapter next to Applejack so that'll be exciting! Cheers!
Definitely enjoyed this chapter. I like the idea of the Mane 6 taking different paths but still arriving at the same destination. I have often thought it would be interesting to have Rarity the one being the alicorn. My only advice is to slow down a little bit - at times this chapter felt rushed.
First off great chapter now observations
Firstly I wonder where poppyseeds is taking young pinkamena
Secondly that guard that helped rarity wouldn't happen to have a lavender colored bookworm for a sister would he?
Thirdly I wonder how the absence of celestia will affect the story going forward,considering that she was the overarching architect of everything that happened in the first three seasons.
Fourth, on the subject I wonder how you will get the main 6 together here since at least rarity seems to have a perfectly serviceable friend group with whom to activate the elements of harmony.
And fifth not a question but considering what happened in fluttershy's chapter I have one eye glued to a certain draconaquis statue in the castle gardens
Overall good chapter as always, I am sufficiently intrigued,and next time WE FINALLY GET TO TWILIGHT'S CHAPTER OHYEAH, THIS IS THE ONE IVE BEEN THE MOST EXCITED ABOUT AND ITS FINALLY AT HAND I AM SO PUMPED, I AM SO PUMPED,I AM SO FLIPPING,EHHEM- um yeah,can't wait till next time, have a good day.
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Well, that guard will definitely be showing up again next chapter
Celestia may be having a more hooves off approach to things this time around, but maybe Rarity will get on her radar in the future
Definitely something I'll address when the Friendship is Magic Part One and Two rewrites roll around!
As for a certain statue... Well, perhaps Harmony's opponent has some plans in the Great Game as well.
I'm definitely excited to tackle Twi's chapter as well what with her- Ah well I can't give the game away so soon but let's just say she's ending up in Ponyville much sooner than in canon
Who does the cutie mark pictures out of curiosity?
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Oh I edit them up myself actually!
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Nice! That's impressive
Got a question.
We see here that the dragon egg test is not meant to be passed. So how come Twilight failed? Wouldn't she have gotten in and just not been Celestia's student?
Seems like an inconsistency in the world. Unless her reaction to the egg test was that bad.
That aside I'm loving the story so keep it up. So far my favorite is Fluttershy 's tale.
Calling it, the guard at the train station was Shining Armor.
And would that prospective student who "failed" the Dragon Egg test happen to be one Sunset Shimmer?
Ah, the Secret Test of Character ... I do hate it. Don't get me wrong, it does seem to be the only real explanation for why every student of CSFGU doesn't have a dragon, but I find it dumbfounding how no one ever goes "You deliberately gave me misleading, or outright false, information and instructions in order to judge my by a hidden criteria, proving that you are either uninterested in, or unable to, deal with me honestly. So why the tartarus would I trust anything you wish to "teach" me when any, or all, of it could all be another one of your "tests"? Goodbye."
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Second point: Sadly, no. Sunset passed it, since she was Tia's apprentice LOOONG before Twilight. It was Twily...