The beginning of the Bound By Blood Saga. This story focuses primarily from the perspective of Shadow Scythe as she, Zeloph, Moxxi and company venture to her home world to stop her enigmatic foe, Mortis. But he ain't the only thing to worry about.
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phew....you really made a new record here
Time to comment on UaR. Probably will be short because I read UaR.
(1) First part is the same, however we can see Zeloph carry Shadow to her new resting place.
I’m even more sad than when I was in PoW! Zeloph is going to bury her near Jonn’s resting place!
(2) Idk what the creature was meant for, but if it was mentioned then it must’ve been important. Not smart enough with this area though so I won’t be able to make theories yet. But it feels… connected to Shadow or Mortis’s reaper past?
(3) Wait… NO! WHAT!? Why did Mini Trix have to die! We do care for you Mini Trix!
And now she’s gone too?
What about the plushies she left behind in Oona’s dimension?
Thanos: Gone, reduced to atoms.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
(4) Equinox and Autumn scene again.
(5) And now we have Mortis. And now he confirmed that Shadow passed away.
WHY!?
(6) I guess we’ll have a Triad x Penny scene. At least they’ll be bonding with each other, maybe they can survive this war despite being on the opposite side?
(7) Feel so sad for Zeloph, at least his friends are supporting him and trying to help him go through his pain and gain mastery of the Vorpal Blade.
Zeloph is better than Mortis.
(8) Wait, he was going to agree to suck on Layla’s tits? Bruh XD
But hey, I understand Zeloph’s position, not an easy decision. But now I guess we’ll have both Bellatrix and Zeloph wanting to increase their powers.
Heh?! So now it’s become a Bellatrix and Zeloph clop scene. Huh.
Yeah, Zeloph isn’t like most men. He’s sigma male level.
At least the alcohol will help him go through this and that Layla will help prevent Zeloph from impregnating Bellatrix.
Bruh Layla, mention these things, don’t leave Zeloph and Bellatrix not knowing what’ll happen to them.
(9) So… did Zeloph really transform???
(10) Midnight scene, again.
(11) Ah, I forgot that Moxxi and Midnight will have sex. In another timeline / moment, this would’ve been a better moment of just carnal transaction, but I guess neither are going to really enjoy this?
Actually Moxxi probably would enjoy some Midnight getting bonked in the head, given it’ll be the only positive moment for her. At least Midnight heard that Moonlight still loved him (but she obviously felt very betrayed by his actions).
Lightning + Moonlight x Dion was certainly an interesting ordeal, especially since Dion did allow Midnight to fuck Oona, it is fair that Dion fucked Lightning. I imagine that if Oona, Midnight, Dion, and Lightning were together Midnight probably wouldn’t have had any embarrassment from allowing this to occur.
(12) Interesting to see everyone either have sex or be happy with each other. Which makes Midnight’s condition all the more sad because he’s forced to endure this terrible experience.
At least hopefully he’ll be removed of his Hyper Stallion trait, or at least have his anger suppressed to 0.
Though from reading Viscera’s scene (in which Equinox wasn’t as happy as everyone else lol), imagine if he just gets injected with more Hyper Stallion genes again, and this time just flat out dies thanks to Fiery. Cause it sounds like that’s the plan. At the very least his DNA will be shipped to Fiery so that his scientists can work on it.
Fiery probably wouldn’t sacrifice himself as the Hyper Stallion, right?
(13) Again it’s sad where Midnight is now. He’s suffering so much embarrassment that I wish he just dies to save him from more. Cause I don’t think that him having his Hyper DNA removed will stop it from occurring.
(14) And of course, Viscera is going to cause everything to go bad, really bad. I feel bad for Equinox now. Everyone in Midnight’s world suffered so much and they’ll probably keep suffering until they finally rest, whether from someone actually helping them (Marathyssa helping Shining) or through death (please kill Midnight for his own sake lol)
Hyper Stallion or no Hyper Stallion, Midnight is just dying of embarrassment lol.
His honor as a soldier is getting thoroughly destroyed by everyone.
(Lol, as if he has any left after doing what he's done. To be honest it feels awkward having to read this since well I'm his author and Midnight is my main OC, my representative, but oh well, it's still fun reading)
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1. Figured it would be fitting since they're both important to Zeloph.
3. We'll see what happened to the plushies (hopefully next chapter?), I already came up with the scene in my mind but there wasn't room with how packed this was!
11. Yeah, Moonlight will always love Midnight, she simply feels disappointed and betrayed by him.
I was mixed about Lightning shacking up with Dion (It was originally Beatrix), but I figure a combination of lingering estrus and her being childish due to raised in the hive all her life, wanting to feel grown up means she decided to do some 'adult' stuff!
12. Fiery probably wouldn't become a hyper-stallion if he could, he likes being in control!
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(1) Yeah, poor Zeloph. He suffered so much. And I imagine that Viscera would like Zeloph to produce an encore and eliminate everyone in his fury, just like how eventually Zeloph cracked after the death of Jonn and killed all the sinners.
(3) Imagine if the plushies stay alive and save the world lol (by telling that Omen is the bad guy I guess)
(11) Yeah, its nice that Midnight can see that Moonlight still cares deep inside, at the same time Midnight has become a living piñata for everyone to bonk with a stick.
(12) Indeed, would he sacrifice Midnight again if he got the chance?
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3. Don't think the plushies know about Omen since they weren't there and are independent entities after Demi brought them to life.
12. Fiery would do anything he thinks is for the better of his Equestria in his warped mind.
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(3) Ah so they don't die even if Mini Trix is gone? Or do they go into stasis?
(12) You think we'll soon see Fiery's past more? He probably was twisted into his current state just like Equinox.
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3. You'll see, but yes, they're still around!
12. More of Fiery's background would be interesting, so far we've seen little hints of his past piece-by-piece.
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(3) huzzah
(12) need more info? Still thinking about his role in the Original version of Midnight.
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What in particular did you want to know? Thunder, Shining, and Fiery were the head knights under Cadance, Thunder and Cadance died, Shining and Fiery fell apart in different ways due to a fallout between them.
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Hmm, well if I were to see anything in PoW for Fiery, then I guess more flashback to more distance parts of his past lol.
Cause he does seem to be very distracted now.
I like every single character.
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Hopefully eventually! Although I want to give everyone some focus, and Fiery is pretty well explored so far.
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Alright
I think "flush" will be clearer in describing blushing here.
You used the noun here. The adjective is "melancholic".
Either shorten the highlighted phrase to "numb" or replace it with "void of emotion".
It's "balled".
That sentence could be taken in all the wrong ways.🙄
You'll exploit anything that happens, no matter how disrespectful it may be.😠
What's wrong, Mortis? Regretting Atalanta's death already?
Wow, jumping right to home base. If that's what it took to get laid in reality, I would have a harem in the 100s by now!😤
How can a beak still feel like lips?😕
"Mouthpussy"? Is that a sex term I've never heard of?🤔
Seb, just stop.
Like what? His dick?😝
Try enclosing with asterisks to indicate sound effects in her voice.
Isn't "asscheeks" 1 word?
Good question.
At best, it's a test. At worst, it's a trick.😰
Somehow, this sounds incredibly suspicious, even for a dream.
I knew it!😤
Typo here. It should be "Changelings".
the 2nd "sorry" is redundant.
The "T" is missing at the start.
Full stop is missing here.
It should be "dog".
Damnit! Viscera's anaesthetic is starting to take hold.😰
It just keeps getting worse & worse with each chapter. If I didn't know you better, I'd think you were sadistic!
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1./2./3./4./13./14./19./20./21./22./23. As always, thank you for the additional grammar.
7. I don’t think so. Perhaps it’s just dawned to him how empty vengeful victory truly is. Even with his dead nemesis’ soul at his disposal, nothing is satisfying.
8. It’s an unapologetic horny tale.
10. It’s a pretty common slang in hentai/wank material.
11. Just goes to show that being good is quite the chore.
12. Nah, too easy.
16./17./18. I truly love this sequence. Not because of the smut or nightmare, but because I was able to get away with a casual reveal that no one’s figured out yet.
25. Oh trust me. I’ve been holding back from making the situation even worse. So many threats to reveal, it’s a shame I can’t choose all of them. Maybe for other stories down the road…
26.You got me! That is indeed the hidden title.
27. It’s hard to tell a compelling narrative if crucial characters aren’t at risk of dying. Regardless of her status or her lover’s determination, Atlanta was doomed to die. And unfortunately, others will follow if Omen isn’t stopped…