11180406 While that would be nice to see, (believe me, young Trixie sounds like a brat and a bully who needs a lesson) I don't think he will change that much that quickly. I am, however, not saying he won't change.
Previously, we have learned he lived for at least 30 years being "cowardly", in comparison to how long he has lived in his new body it is not even half. And just to clear this up, being Cowardly is not completely a bad thing. It is normal to want to avoid pain, it is normal to want to avoid uncertainty, and it is normal to want to avoid mistakes that could lead to bad outcomes. It only becomes a problem when it dominates you, as I imagine Incognito knows personally from his previous life.
The process will be slow, since he will have to unlearn more than a quarter-century of habits. But Incognito is not alone here, and has a good head start on his incentive to change.
This would be a boring story if every problem was solved immediately, right?
If Gravelord Nito of Dark Souls 1 has a high enough wisdom, one day he might turn all his curses into a positive.
25% extra effectiveness when dodging, assessing, and escape sounds like a game breaker in certain scenarios. Imagine if these abilities of Nito's was an aura buff.
I mean, really, in late game, 25% sounds likely overpowered if the character has a high enough min-max. Especially if the buffed stats go above the cap
Hmm. Not too sure I like the idea that everyone knows they’ve got “stats” but it’s not been too intrusive so far, and I very much like your characterizations. I do like the story so far overall, so keep doing what you’re doing!
I feel this chapter's focus is to remind us that RGRE is a thing here, and this was just a little, very little taste.
And also that our MC here is starting to grow and clash with his past life's mistakes. Of course this is just the start, but with the literal will of the world questioning your actions, there is plenty room for improvement.
Really liking this story so far. We will see where it leads us to in the future.
Incognito trotted happily down the street, feeling fairly content
Also, as with every single chapter so far, you seem to have trouble with quotation marks.
e quiet, you little invalid. Trixie will make whatever remarks she pleases about your dam, she said, spitting out the disparaging term harshly.
I stopped counting when I noticed 4 other instances of missing quotation marks, or ones placed incorrectly. You really need to edit your work, my friend, this is sloppy.
I for one hate cowardly characters. It just makes me angry that for some reason you start crying and can't do anything but cry. You can have emotions but when you let fear of whatever is in front of you freeze you stiff just sucks. Also if you start crying for literally no reason is even worse Like SpongeBob or seasons 1-3 deku from MHA. Get your shit together.
11180764 Thanks for the catches fam, I made some adjustments but I'm in mobile so proper editing will have to wait for tomorrow when I have a day off and a good night's sleep behind me.
11180804 Oh no, the crying wasn't because he was scared. The tears didn't start until he realized what he had done. He was perfectly capable of acting and decided not to. The tears were from shame.
In my opinion cowardice isn't so much not being able to act. If bravery is acting even though you are scared of suffering, then I'd say cowardice is attempting to avoid taking action even when you are able in an attempt to avoid suffering, which is much worse for me at least.
The fucking cheek, big talk for an immortal deity to be "disappointed" with a mortal for "cowardice". What was she expecting him to do? Stand up for a stranger as a colt in a mare-ruled world? That's not cowardice, it's called picking your fights and that was not one he could win. I'm not criticising the story here, just that god's comment actually angers me. If I were Nito I'd be seething at the cheek of this bitch back-seating my life. "Get your arse down here and say that to my fucking face you star-spangled, judgmental bitch." But hey, now I'm invested, no one should be allowed to get away with harming Derpy
11180523 Maybe, it would depend on how the Accolade/Curse system stacks things. In some RPG's it's possible to have opposite buff/de-buff traits active at the same time. For example, in GURPS you can take both the 'Lucky' Advantage and the 'Unlucky' Disadvantage and the mechanics stack in a way that is very different from having average luck. (For completeness sake, it makes your luck very swingy, things either go great or terribly there's almost no middle ground.)
I feel this chapter's focus is to remind us that RGRE is a thing here, and this was just a little, very little taste.
I'm not getting strong RGRE vibes from it. If he'd been a girl on Earth and Derpy had been a boy being picked on by another boy, nobody would have expected the girl to confront the male bully aor stand up for the boy being picked on. And nobody would accuse her of being a coward for doing nothing.
Here, the goddess of the realm officially informed him he was a coward and saddled him with a curse for not rescuing the damsel in distress. That's about as non-RGRE as you can get. At the same time, if he'd been a girl and the bully had been a boy...the bully would probably not have picked on the girl like Trixie did here:
“Hey! Hey you, colt! what are you staring at, huh!? Do you have something to say to Trixie or are you just going to stand there and cry all day?”
This isn't RGRE.
If Trixie had tried to leverage the fact that she was bullying Derpy to flirt with Incognito, that would have been RGRE. If he'd stood up to Trixe and Trixie had immediately backed down despite him being smaller and scared, because she "wasn't going to fight a colt" that would have been RGRE. if Derpy had suddenly found the courage to stand up for herself because a colt was watching, even that would have been RGRE.
The only hints of RGRE here are the few lines of dialogue that I guess are trying to inform us that it's RGRE despite the fact that the action isn't showing it. "must be scary for a colt to have such a big mean filly in his face" and "Pathetic, hiding behind a crying colt." in particular. But given how completely non-RGRE the action is...these couple lines of dialogue aren't really enough to change the balance of what's going on here.
Honestly, I come away feeling like the author is male, trying to write RGRE, but the social conditioning is strong enough that he's writing Earth-normal situations with a little bit of RGRE-flavored icing on the top.
11181359 My point still stands tho. Maybe I should have written that this was a reminder that the story will contain RGRE elements in the near or far future.
Left the site for a while because I lost interest, come back to see what I missed and I think I'm back in again thanks to this, look forward to seeing more mate.
The proper response to that one liner is "I didn't see you fucking doing anything either. And it's a bit hypocritical to chide me for cowardice while hiding behind a remote interface."
I appreciate that the Rob is continuing to be a presence in the story rather than just setting things up and vanishing(which is garbage writing) but damn that is one judgemental horse.
11181555 well, you have to keep in mind she seems to view mortals to be about as valuable as pokemon cards, she isn't disappointed morally, she is disappointed because him standing there like a lump when faced with that sort of situation was boring to her.
11181359 same here, the goddess' statement is not a moral admonishment, it's an expression of disappointment. He was branded a coward because he met the conditions. In an rgre situation (or my interpretation of it at least) , a stallion (or colt in this case) would not be expected to come to the defense of a mare (or filly), nor would most of them consider it. however, since the character comes from a morel framework where he would be expected to step in in that situation, and has that ingrained into him (keep in mind, 30 years vs 5), he did feel like he should help, but chose not too because he did not want to take the risk that he might get dragged into it.
He then stood there for some considerable length of time, long enough for Trixie to stop what she was doing and notice she was being watched, and she probably attempted to get his attention a number of times before he snapped back to reality. The line asking him if he would say something is a frustrated attempt to communicate, not bullying.
thirdly, she did back down because a colt was involved, she simply framed it in a way that would be the most disparaging towards her target by accusing her of using him as a shield. if anything "I wouldn't hit a colt" expressly would have been kind of cheesy and on the nose IMO. it sounds like someone might have rgre brainrot, but I'm sure most of us do at this point, me included, so it can't be faulted.
Okay, so I immediately rolled my eyes when I read the first few paragraphs.
'Because, of course some random designated asshole pony (DT, Trix, spoiled, Gilda, blueblood) is gonna be extremely rude to a fan/the author's favorite character and the main character is gonna come to the rescue'
He was sadly pulled out of his thoughts by the sound of some rabble being roused nearby. A rather haughty female voice crying out in indignation.
“I-I’m sorry, I just don’t know what went wrong…”
The colt turned to the source of the commotion. He saw a little grey pegasus filly with a blonde mane sitting cross-eyed on the cobbles, rubbing her head as a rather angry-looking little blue unicorn filly glared down at her with disgust apparent in her eyes.
“Well, clearly quite a bit from the looks of you, if I had to guess, your mother probably drank too much when she was bearing you.”
To quote Po from Kung Fu Panda, "Now wait a minute. That's uncalled for."
Well after this i dont think he is gonna be a coward and next time he might just hit trixie
Will all his other bonuses stack or even multiply as he achieves them? As in the Ability, Mr Popos Dodge?
great chapters!~
11180406
While that would be nice to see, (believe me, young Trixie sounds like a brat and a bully who needs a lesson) I don't think he will change that much that quickly. I am, however, not saying he won't change.
Previously, we have learned he lived for at least 30 years being "cowardly", in comparison to how long he has lived in his new body it is not even half. And just to clear this up, being Cowardly is not completely a bad thing. It is normal to want to avoid pain, it is normal to want to avoid uncertainty, and it is normal to want to avoid mistakes that could lead to bad outcomes. It only becomes a problem when it dominates you, as I imagine Incognito knows personally from his previous life.
The process will be slow, since he will have to unlearn more than a quarter-century of habits. But Incognito is not alone here, and has a good head start on his incentive to change.
This would be a boring story if every problem was solved immediately, right?
First you got my curiosity but now... You got my full willing attention!
If
GravelordNitoof Dark Souls 1has a high enough wisdom, one day he might turn all his curses into a positive.25% extra effectiveness when dodging, assessing, and escape sounds like a game breaker in certain scenarios. Imagine if these abilities of Nito's was an aura buff.
I mean, really, in late game, 25% sounds likely overpowered if the character has a high enough min-max. Especially if the buffed stats go above the cap
If his destiny is to be distinctly average, since he did something cowardly, he has to be brave now to cancel it out
Hmm. Not too sure I like the idea that everyone knows they’ve got “stats” but it’s not been too intrusive so far, and I very much like your characterizations. I do like the story so far overall, so keep doing what you’re doing!
11180443
Oh it's not a bad wish if you want a quiet life. It's just rarely that easy.
I feel this chapter's focus is to remind us that RGRE is a thing here, and this was just a little, very little taste.
And also that our MC here is starting to grow and clash with his past life's mistakes. Of course this is just the start, but with the literal will of the world questioning your actions, there is plenty room for improvement.
Really liking this story so far. We will see where it leads us to in the future.
Also, as with every single chapter so far, you seem to have trouble with quotation marks.
I stopped counting when I noticed 4 other instances of missing quotation marks, or ones placed incorrectly. You really need to edit your work, my friend, this is sloppy.
I for one hate cowardly characters. It just makes me angry that for some reason you start crying and can't do anything but cry. You can have emotions but when you let fear of whatever is in front of you freeze you stiff just sucks. Also if you start crying for literally no reason is even worse Like SpongeBob or seasons 1-3 deku from MHA. Get your shit together.
Anyways still good work on the writing
11180077
How dare you
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR_GbR90Q3fmhP8PqSh0b-vkYoUfLvHWyuLpA&usqp=CAU
11180764
Thanks for the catches fam, I made some adjustments but I'm in mobile so proper editing will have to wait for tomorrow when I have a day off and a good night's sleep behind me.
11180804
Oh no, the crying wasn't because he was scared. The tears didn't start until he realized what he had done. He was perfectly capable of acting and decided not to. The tears were from shame.
In my opinion cowardice isn't so much not being able to act. If bravery is acting even though you are scared of suffering, then I'd say cowardice is attempting to avoid taking action even when you are able in an attempt to avoid suffering, which is much worse for me at least.
11180708
Good synopsis, and glad you are enjoying ^^
11180409
Let's hope he doesn't have to learn Piccolos Dodge
11180476
Well spoken ^^
11180489
Always happy to entertain!
11180521
Indeed, fear is a powerful motivator. :3
11180658
Thanks! The fact that everyone is aware of the system will play into things later on, I've got some fun plans for thematic stuff.
11180523
Perhaps, but what, and when!!? >:3
The fucking cheek, big talk for an immortal deity to be "disappointed" with a mortal for "cowardice". What was she expecting him to do? Stand up for a stranger as a colt in a mare-ruled world? That's not cowardice, it's called picking your fights and that was not one he could win.
I'm not criticising the story here, just that god's comment actually angers me. If I were Nito I'd be seething at the cheek of this bitch back-seating my life. "Get your arse down here and say that to my fucking face you star-spangled, judgmental bitch."
But hey, now I'm invested, no one should be allowed to get away with harming Derpy
11180523
Maybe, it would depend on how the Accolade/Curse system stacks things. In some RPG's it's possible to have opposite buff/de-buff traits active at the same time. For example, in GURPS you can take both the 'Lucky' Advantage and the 'Unlucky' Disadvantage and the mechanics stack in a way that is very different from having average luck. (For completeness sake, it makes your luck very swingy, things either go great or terribly there's almost no middle ground.)
11180923
What about Vegeta's Instincts?
11180708
I'm not getting strong RGRE vibes from it. If he'd been a girl on Earth and Derpy had been a boy being picked on by another boy, nobody would have expected the girl to confront the male bully aor stand up for the boy being picked on. And nobody would accuse her of being a coward for doing nothing.
Here, the goddess of the realm officially informed him he was a coward and saddled him with a curse for not rescuing the damsel in distress. That's about as non-RGRE as you can get. At the same time, if he'd been a girl and the bully had been a boy...the bully would probably not have picked on the girl like Trixie did here:
“Hey! Hey you, colt! what are you staring at, huh!? Do you have something to say to Trixie or are you just going to stand there and cry all day?”
This isn't RGRE.
If Trixie had tried to leverage the fact that she was bullying Derpy to flirt with Incognito, that would have been RGRE. If he'd stood up to Trixe and Trixie had immediately backed down despite him being smaller and scared, because she "wasn't going to fight a colt" that would have been RGRE. if Derpy had suddenly found the courage to stand up for herself because a colt was watching, even that would have been RGRE.
The only hints of RGRE here are the few lines of dialogue that I guess are trying to inform us that it's RGRE despite the fact that the action isn't showing it. "must be scary for a colt to have such a big mean filly in his face" and "Pathetic, hiding behind a crying colt." in particular. But given how completely non-RGRE the action is...these couple lines of dialogue aren't really enough to change the balance of what's going on here.
Honestly, I come away feeling like the author is male, trying to write RGRE, but the social conditioning is strong enough that he's writing Earth-normal situations with a little bit of RGRE-flavored icing on the top.
11181359
My point still stands tho. Maybe I should have written that this was a reminder that the story will contain RGRE elements in the near or far future.
Damn, I'm guessing the Goddess will play the role of guilt tripper and motivator in this story
Left the site for a while because I lost interest, come back to see what I missed and I think I'm back in again thanks to this, look forward to seeing more mate.
The proper response to that one liner is "I didn't see you fucking doing anything either. And it's a bit hypocritical to chide me for cowardice while hiding behind a remote interface."
I appreciate that the Rob is continuing to be a presence in the story rather than just setting things up and vanishing(which is garbage writing) but damn that is one judgemental horse.
11181555
well, you have to keep in mind she seems to view mortals to be about as valuable as pokemon cards, she isn't disappointed morally, she is disappointed because him standing there like a lump when faced with that sort of situation was boring to her.
11181359
same here, the goddess' statement is not a moral admonishment, it's an expression of disappointment. He was branded a coward because he met the conditions. In an rgre situation (or my interpretation of it at least) , a stallion (or colt in this case) would not be expected to come to the defense of a mare (or filly), nor would most of them consider it. however, since the character comes from a morel framework where he would be expected to step in in that situation, and has that ingrained into him (keep in mind, 30 years vs 5), he did feel like he should help, but chose not too because he did not want to take the risk that he might get dragged into it.
He then stood there for some considerable length of time, long enough for Trixie to stop what she was doing and notice she was being watched, and she probably attempted to get his attention a number of times before he snapped back to reality. The line asking him if he would say something is a frustrated attempt to communicate, not bullying.
thirdly, she did back down because a colt was involved, she simply framed it in a way that would be the most disparaging towards her target by accusing her of using him as a shield. if anything "I wouldn't hit a colt" expressly would have been kind of cheesy and on the nose IMO. it sounds like someone might have rgre brainrot, but I'm sure most of us do at this point, me included, so it can't be faulted.
that's just my look on things though ^^
11181583
Well. I am writing a letter of protest to her.
Dear Horse God-
Words can hurt.
-hugs and kisses, Mad Maud.
Okay, so I immediately rolled my eyes when I read the first few paragraphs.
'Because, of course some random designated asshole pony (DT, Trix, spoiled, Gilda, blueblood) is gonna be extremely rude to a fan/the author's favorite character and the main character is gonna come to the rescue'
But they didn't...
So congratulations, expectations subverted
I hope he can get rid of the coward curse.
11182267
I'm sure he does too XD
Well, there is a lot positive about this curse. More good than bad actually. If he plays his cards well he can do a lot with it.
Shielding, hit and run attacks. As long he can outlast the opposition he can win any confrontation
To quote Po from Kung Fu Panda, "Now wait a minute. That's uncalled for."