The Iron Chancellor

by Radical Centrist

A disappointing prelude

"We've found the earth ponies commander!" General Shocker announced, flying down to Hurricanes' cloud. "They will be here in around an hour."

Hurricane was currently studying a map of their current surrounding whilst he was surrounded by unicorn nobles. "How many did you see?" He asked, checking the ground to ensure the map was accurate.

"They are currently marching in columns, and they are around 10,000 strong." Shocker answered the even columns allowing him to guess accurately. "They also have iron armour, weapons and strangely, giant wooden spoons."

"The spoon again..." Hurricane thought, fearing that he had killed Lefty needlessly. "Worry not, our elite pegasus army will scatter those untrained mud ponies." Hurricane dismissed, as everypony knew the only way to win battles were to employ trained, pegasus knights which would smash into enemy formations, routing them by force and speed.

"How about us? Will, you need our support?" The unicorn nobles asked, their entire body covered in golden armour.

"You will shield our officers whilst the mud ponies shoot their bolts," Hurricane decided, rolling up the map. "We will wait for the mud ponies to come and tire themselves out."

"Shall we prepare an ambush then?" Shocker asked, which got Hurricane shaking his head.

"Nay, an ambush will get us disorganised. Instead, tell the pegasuses to perch on top of clouds and tell them to attack at a signal. Make sure they are also grouped so our charge will not be scattered." Hurricane ordered, "A unicorn on me, you will be giving them the signal." A unicorn nodded, and the rest flew off. The other unicorns moving via cloud walking and a pegasus guard who carried their cloud.

---

"They're right above us..." Forest repeated, increasing the tension within the army.

A villager from a nearby hill had told them of a pegasus army that was hiding above the clouds sent to crush them, and they had prepared accordingly, telling all the soldiers to hold their pikes close so that they could raise them at the faintest notion.

"They're waiting to surround us..." Jaco stated, holding onto his crossbow firmly.

The soldiers braced themselves for a fight, intentionally slowing themselves down to not exhaust themselves. Catapults were moved to the centre of their columns instead of the back, as they knew they would be surrounded.

"Are they going to do anything?" Green complained, the fear of a looming battle overshadowing the fear of death. "A signal? A noise? Anything?"

"Be patient colt," Copper scolded, "A unicorn noble will probably initiate the battle with a flare spell..." Copper scanned the skies for any such signals.

Then they saw it.

A glaring red flare radiated across them, its orange glare reflecting off their iron plates. As every Jacobin looked up to see the spectacle, all the clouds above them dispersed into puffs to reveal a horde of pegasuses.

"PIKES UP!" Forest shouted, causing a blanket of poles and iron to rise and cover the suns' ray. "FORM SQUARES!" he barked, and the soldiers followed, moving into formation in an orderly manner.

"THEY HAVE SHIELDS! FIRE THE CATAPULTS FIRST!" Copper ordered, which caused many of the soldiers to retract their crossbows and focus on their pikes. The catapults fired.

---

"DESTROY THEM! CHARGE!" Shocker shouted, encouraging the pegasus to surge forward, diving straight towards the mud ponies to destroy them.

The earth ponies then suddenly raised giant spears and began grouping into individual squares, causing Shocker to hesitate slightly. "THEY ARE TRYING TO IMPALE US! HALT IMMEDIATELY!" The charging pegasuses agreed as they all stopped mid-charge to evaluate their situation.

"Where are our rangers?" Shocker asked himself, as he looked around to locate them. He found them lagging behind, still perched atop clouds so that their arrows wouldn't fly off.

"Sir! What do we do?" A pegasus lieutenant asked as they were forced to stare at the earth ponies below awkwardly, their surprise entirely gone.

"We wait for our rangers, charging now would be suicide." Shocker replied, watching the earth ponies staring at them too. Then he realised something. "SCATTER IMMEDIATELY! THEY ARE TRYING TO PICK US OFF WITH BOL-"

SPLAT

His words were cut off, as the hurled rocks annihilated him as well as the pegasus front and second lines, turning the skies into a cloud of dust, rocks, gut and blood. The rangers looked in horror, as their comrades directly below them were turned into paste. The unicorns held their horns and cringed in pain, as the blunt projectiles shattered their shields which were only conjured against piercing attacks.

"*Hrgk* I'm going to be sick..." A unicorn noble groaned, his horns aching and stomach-turning witnessing the gore.

"What... What just happened?!" Hurricane demanded, witnessing the wooden spoons hurling stones which devasted his charge. He began regretting killing Lefty, for he could've informed him of this devastating weapon.

---

"Now gentlecolts! Now's your time!" Jaco announced waving his helmet, prompting the soldiers to dig their pikes into the ground and aim their crossbows. Their targets were in the open, vulnerable, frozen in shock and terrified. It was perfect.

TWANG

The pegasuses tried to evade, but the hail of bolts climbed too quickly to avoid. They weren't strong enough to pierce their armour due to distance, but it pierced their wings and scattered their clouds, causing them to fall to the pike-ridden floor.

In response, the Jacobins hid under their shields attached to their pikes, stabilising the pikes by grabbing onto them.

It began raining pegasuses.

"Quite a sight innit'?" Forest piped, trying to lighten his soldier's moods from the gory scene. Nopony heeded him, and simply closed their eyes to prevent the blood from entering them.

The falling pegasuses were skewered onto pikes, the lucky ones dying instantly from the pikes scrambling their brains. However, some were kebab'ed or impaled by multiple pikes, their intestines and guts sprawling all over the shields attached to the pikes.

---

Hurricane saw helplessly as the wooden spoons were being reloaded, and their position seemed bleak. "RETREAT! BACK TOWARDS THE FORTRESS!" Hurricane boomed, flying immediately away, leaving the unicorn nobles to look over the routing pegasus.

The Jacobins meanwhile, stood shocked.

"THAT WAS IT?!" Forest gasped, expecting a gigantic battle, but instead witnessing an enemy army withdraw entirely after a single volley. "They are yet to be destroyed..." Forest grimly thought, as the escaping pegasus could just easily fly over them towards their holdings.

"Unfortunately yes, as we don't have the capabilities to chase them and destroy them." Green shrugged, memorising a detail in the book; If your opponents are more maneuverable, you stand no chance defeating them!" It had summarised an event when a large armour griffon force was defeated by a fast, light force by ending in battle which they could win and fleeing when they couldn't.

"Then how are we supposed to defeat them then?" Jaco inquired, whilst traces of blood dripped down his helmet.

"...by forcing them to fight us," Green concluded; already knowing how he could achieve this without burning villagers or mines to provoke a response.

"How will you achieve that?" Copper questioned Green; pondering what they could do.

"Why, by sieging everything of course," Green shrugged, as, without the forts, all the earth ponies would be free to do whatever they wanted. This meant that if they did not intervene, they would soon lose their food and starve. Green knew that they would forsee this, and knew that they would fight doggedly to protect their main headquarters; Cloudia.

After all, you can't defend something whilst flying. Or else, the earth ponies would simply take the forts and seal the roof, cutting the pegasus off.

The pegasus would fight.
The Jacobins would fight.
The unicorns would fight.

They would all fight on the ground.

Author's Note:

Commander Hurricane isn't braindead, so he told his soldiers to retreat instead of ramming their heads against the pikes.

Only 700 died.

What did you expect? The entire army dying? Puh-puh-preposterous! Only a dumb cartoon character would order an attack in those conditions!

Comments

[Bronycommander]

agreed, you did a great job writing it

[kaiser0kolovos]

Destroying an entire cloud city? Go big or go home apparently.

Attacking Cloudia, which the Earth Ponies have never been able to threaten before, would help to break Hurricane's (and the rest of the Pegasi's) pride.

I wonder what can the Jacobins do to the Unicorns to cause a similar reaction.

Edit:
Wait a second.

"He began regretting killing Lefty, for he could've informed him of this devastating weapon."

He did tell you about the catapults you twit.

[HB_DS2013]

I'm starting to think canon severely nerfed earth ponies.

[Davenfjeld]

Duly incredible, I still think you ought to go through and repair those early chapters though (and you do still write some clunky sentences).

Ive read this entire thing in... 3 hours and 40 minutes. Not bad. A wonderful read to be sure, I cannot wait for more!

It is now 20 to four. Goodnight

[Radical Centrist]

10823854
Thanks for the corrections, I will fix them all shortly

[Radical Centrist]

10823634
Thanks alot

[yammering2]

I love it !!!!!!!